r/AmiInTheWrong

So, I been with this girl for about a year and half. She was married before and her husband died. They both had each other’s name tattooed on them while married.
Her husband has been deceased for about 3 years.

I told her we won’t have a future much longer if she doesn’t have the tattoo covered.

It’s on her chest and although during the winter it is mostly covered, during the summer when it’s hot and she wears tank tops or shirts with open chest area, it is shown.

I don’t want anyone asking her what it says and she says someone else’s name and they know that’s not me.

I believe most people would feel the same way.

If it will be a long term committed relationship then there should be sacrifices and accommodations made. Never mind thinking about spending the rest of my life with.

I’m not asking her to forget her past with the guy but I don’t want to be with someone that has another man’s name on them. Especially when it’s noticeable.

She has said she would but doesn’t have the money right now, she has kids and it doesn’t look like she will anytime in the near or far future either.

She also has said if I want it off so bad then I should pay for it.

That right there is a big red flag for me because I do a lot for her and her kids.

I feel like her saying that is like a slap in the face.

Am I over reacting or do I have a reasonable expectation?

I’m 18F and my boyfriend is 19M. A few weeks ago, an older woman (probably late 40s/early 50s) came into his job. He works on cars, so she got his number for work-related reasons. What bothered me was how she acted toward him. She kept grabbing his arm while laughing and even put money in his pocket. My boyfriend said it made him really uncomfortable.

I’ve dealt with situations in the past where people crossed boundaries and nobody really stood up for me, so I’m not someone who just stays quiet when something feels off. I ended up texting her because I felt like boundaries needed to be set. Looking back, maybe messaging her directly wasn’t the best move, but I was upset and protective of my relationship.

Now I’m wondering if I overreacted or if my feelings were valid. Am I in the wrong?

AITA
So for context I’m a 16 year old female and my boyfriend is also 17, we’re Juniors in high school and have known each other since 8th grade. I’ve been smoking weed regularly since I was 14 years old because it helps with my anxiety. When I don’t I’m so anxious and paranoid that I jump at the slightest sudden sound. He smokes just because he wants to. He sneaks out of his house at night to go smoke with friends at a park. His dad has grounded him for it several times before. My parents know I smoke. A few weeks ago he took me on a date and while I was leaving he and his dad were at my door, and his dad yelled at me that we better not be smoking weed in here and that I better not be supplying it. His dad doesn’t know I smoke. But my house smells like weed because my dad smokes heavily and very day as I only smoke once or twice a week at home over the weekend when I don’t have to do anything. My boyfriend is getting stoned at school and most days of the week. Personally I don’t like him smoking weed because he becomes mean to me and I’ve made that clear to him. I don’t want to make it an “I’m smarter than you” argument but I’m an AP (Advanced Placement) student and enrolled in community college. He is failing majority of his class and has been since we’ve met. I think I’m safer and smarter about it and he’s evening recklessly because he’s doing it at school and has gotten caught. After his dad yelled at me because of his habits I told my boyfriend if he keeps smoking he and I will have problems. Am I a hypocrite?

To be clear I don’t have an issue necessarily with him smoking I have an issue with his recklessness. He’s smoking at school, getting caught, sneaking out, any lying about it. I told him we’d have problems after his dad accused ME of being the problem and encouraging it.

My friend 26 (f) masc-lesbian. She's short and on the tiny side, and has a fade . We were out dining at a restaurant one night, and it's important to note she had a drink or two. Our waitor was a young man, and was very polite and accidentally called her "sir" when addressing her. She corrected him, and though he owned up to his accident and apologized, she berated him and asked him if his pronouns were "she/her" and could she address him as a woman. He was very polite and kept saying "no ma'am." We tipped him generously, but we told my friend she was in the wrong because she was responding to him out of spite as opposed to a valid misunderstanding. She says we are in the wrong for saying she was rude for this because we don't get misgendered and don't have valid insight on the topic Is my friend in the wrong or are we in the wrong for calling out her behavior?

Currently in a situation and not sure the next step to take. My baby was born at 34 weeks and had a 3 week stay in the NICU, she just currently came home. We have only been home for 2 days before learning that my step mother pulled out a life insurance policy on her without our consent or even a discussion. Oh and made herself the beneficiary. I confronted them and my father and told them they have way overstepped a boundary. They’re excuse as to why is because it’s a savings account for “college” and they have policies on my siblings and their nieces which I find extremely bizzar. We have called the company the policy if through and they have told us to email them to cancel the policy because she used fraudulent information to obtain the life insurance and that you cannot obtain it without the parents consent or if you are a legal guardian. Not sure which steps to take in order to get this fixed and protect my daughter. Mind you they pulled this life insurance while she was still in the NICU on breathing support and she has other health conditions.

I’ve had this friend for a while and not too long ago she had vented to me about her having bulimia. At first I comforted her and tried to stick by her side but honestly now it’s kinda annoying me. Every time I go out with her, after she’s finished eating she’ll go to the bathroom for about an hour and makes me wait for her. She’s always body checking around me, asks me if her bones pop out too much, and always talks about how “fat” she is. Other than that I notice that sometimes my carts or cash go missing (which mind you I work almost 10 hours a day for my checks and she doesn’t have a job) everytime she comes over and I’m sick of it. I just feel like she takes advantage of me and I’m not sure what to do. Do I drop her?

I \[18F\] have been dating my bf \[18M\] for 6 monthes now and he gives me a gift every month. It is really cute but it stresses me out cause obviously i need to give him something as well. I really suck at gift giving and honestly i hate it. And i feel bad for not wanting to buy him a gift. But i mean a gift every months is just crazy! I usually end up buying something last minute. I don't know what to do. I don't wanna hurt him by saying that his gifts make me more anxious than happy. But i am running out of ideas and most of the time i don't have the time to go to every store and look for gifts. Personally, i just enjoy spending time with him. I don't think that gifts are necessary. I mean we have some legos i got him and stuff he got me that we haven't even finished building. I don't see the point in anymore gifts.

M27 / F27

My girlfriend and I got into a minor argument around 2am last night. I want to be fair and admit that I definitely escalated things afterward by intentionally continuing to annoy her when she was already irritated. I was tickling/prodding at her feet trying to get a reaction even though she clearly wasn’t in the mood for it. Looking back, it was immature and aggravating, especially because she had something important the next morning and was stressed about getting enough sleep.

Things escalated and she ended up punching me in the face hard enough that I cut the inside of my lip. What upset me afterward was that there didn’t seem to be much remorse about it, and the argument kept spiraling from there. She started insulting my appearance and telling me I should “go to hell and burn.”

She only ended up getting a few hours of sleep before a 10am–4pm event the next day, and her main argument is that I ruined the night before something important. To try and make things easier this morning, I offered to pay for her Uber there and back, bought her a coffee, etc. The coffee was refused and is just sitting there untouched.

I do accept that I pushed things too far with the annoyance and contributed to the situation when I should’ve just left it alone and let us both calm down. But I’m also struggling with the fact that the physical side of it and some of the things said to me seem to be getting brushed past because she was stressed and tired.

Trying to get a balanced outside perspective because I genuinely can’t tell if I’m underreacting or overreacting to how unhealthy this whole interaction was on both sides.

So I (23M) have this classmate (22F) who's been in basically all my classes for four years. In four years, she has genuinely never spoken to me — well, okay, there was this one time like a year before all this where we had the most forgettable small talk ever. Barely even counts.

So you can imagine how weird it was when she randomly DMed me out of nowhere in a panic asking for cash.

Around the same time I found out through a friend that she was apparently hitting up a bunch of other classmates too — and the wild part? She was giving everyone a totally different emergency story.

She also asked me in the same message if I knew any good loan apps she could use. She also asked if I knew any good loan apps she could use. I just told her I didn't know and left it at that.

Here is the exact text exchange:

15/11/2025

17:27 - Classmate: [My Name], [Classmate Name] this side

17:27 - Classmate: I need your help

17:38 - [Missed Voice Call] (I purposefully didn't pick it up as talking would have made the situation even worse.)

18:04 - Classmate: Hello?? Are you there??

18:07 - Me: What happened?

18:08 - Classmate: Im stuck up with some fake loan app fraud and they are blackmailing me now with some edited pictures

Can you please lend me 1k/2k [local currency, enough to buy 28-57 Traditional Kitkat Bars] ill pay you back on time I swear on my parents

18:09 - Me: I'm sorry to hear that. But my parents stopped lending me money after they got to know I have 20 backlogs.

18:09 - Classmate: I just need to get out of this shit

18:10 - Classmate: Can you tell me some loan apps which will give me loan i already 2 loans to repay

18:11 - Me: I suggest you go to the police station. Blackmails don't end well.

18:12 - Classmate: But tonight I need to pay back or else something might happen

18:13 - Me: Then you better hurry to the police station.

(One month later. When she messaged me this second time, I was already having a lot of trouble trying to get 8k \[local currency\] back from the exact same friend who had warned me about her other chat requests.)

13/12/2025

13:55 - Classmate: Can you lend me 300 [local currency] ??

14:18 - Me: I don't know. Can I? 🫩

14:19 - Classmate: I'll be grateful if you will help me

14:20 - Me: And I will regret it if I did.

14:20 - Classmate: I'll pay you back soon within 2 days itself but rn I really need help

14:22 - Me: That's what they all say before they blocked me right after. This isn't my first Rodeo. I'm in no stage of lending money at this moment.

14:23 - Classmate: Ik but you can trust me ill pay you back

14:24 - Me: I already told you I don't have it at the moment.

14:25 - Classmate: Okay

She never messaged me again after that. I don't really feel bad about not lending her anything — I genuinely didn't have it to give. But I do keep thinking about how I got a little sassy when she asked a second time. That part's been bugging me. AITBA?

Edit:- To people who think she was hacked, stop it. She wasn't hacked. I can see her current status every time she is just enjoying herself partying, so no, I don't think she was hacked. And also, from the way she chatted with me, I could understand that it was her. And for those who think it's AI, we'll I don't care anymore. You could just be a fart of Omnipotent AI and you don't even know it yet. I used Kitkat bars as a way of showing the value of my currency around the world.

In high school (HS), he had something like 5 girlfriends, over the course of 2-ish years before he left to another school because of the harassment from the girls' friends. When he and I'd talk back then, he'd say that he'd check in during their sexual exploits and ask if they're alright and that all his relationships had safe words that they could use.

I believed him, I never spoke to the girls about it, some of which were my friends - and the closest of which told me they broke up without bad-blood.

Come to find out 5-years later from her (21F), that she was raped in a church parking lot by him. She hadn't felt comfortable with what was happening and he'd been really pushy over the last few weeks and they did things that she didn't want. However, she hadn't said anything to him about it when it was happening, nor after they went home or broke up. I was aghast, I knew that in the last several years, since he graduated HS, he'd been going to therapy and working through what made this kind of happen.

Now, I, before finding out about the church parking lot from my old friend (though we no longer speak), had a short friends-with-benefits with him. I felt I could trust him. And it was chill, we hooked up like 3 times? The last time made clear to me how these misunderstandings were happening; I had told him that I didn't want anything under my belt but he slowly convinced me otherwise - and things kept going past what I'd wanted them to, but I hadn't said anything. I was consenting but for HS and for younger people, I can understand that it feels like a very heavy pressure to consent.

Whenever I'd spoken to him about the past, like HS, and about the relationships that failed for him, he'd be confused but say he really wanted to grow and actually learn but that the women who he broken up with didn't want to hear from him and he had to respect that.

When I heard about the church parking lot, I told him I couldn't be his friend because, although he was growing and making effort to change, I knew him too long - I knew him when he made those choices and it's like I am approving of them, which I do not.

But I do miss him, we'd known each other for 7, nearly 8, years at that point. He helped me through my parents divorce and was a pretty solid friend to have, but I don't want to support SA or ignore the people who he's hurt. Be friends or no?

I (22F) have a sister (25F) Jane. Jane has asked me in the past if I think she’ll be a good mother and to not her feelings I said maybe. I explained to her the risks, the mental health toll, the stress of having a kid.

Fast forward to yesterday I told her I don’t think she’d be a good mother. She has really bad mental health issues, she has psychosis from drugs, she isn’t financially stable. She is on a limited income. I told her that with her mental health I don’t think she’d survive having to go off her meds for pregnancy or she won’t survive the postpartum depression. I told her after birth your hormones get really messed up. I also told her that her not having a job and being on a limited income isn’t going to be good for having a kid. Kids are expensive. I also told her she was abusive to me in the past and she can’t even handle her cat most days and is kinda abusive to it. I also brought up she never shares and with kids they expect you to share everything, she doesn’t even share with her boyfriend. Also that you’ll have to put someone else before you.

She said to me in response that I don’t see what her and her boyfriend see. She also said she’ll wait till she’s 26. She’s turning 26 this year.

My parents know and have explained they won’t raise her kid or if it shows signs of abuse they will report her. I don’t think Jane fully believes them.

I really don’t think she’ll be a good mother and I told her my thoughts but I kinda feel like an asshole but I’m also mad she’s living in this fantasy world and not thinking about it logically. Every issue I mentioned or things I mentioned that’s not in the post she makes an excuse that won’t be helpful.

So am I in the wrong for thinking she’ll be a bad mother?

When I was in school I was head over heels for this boy that was a few years older. We would talk all the time on Facebook but never in person (every day till like 3 am) he then got a girlfriend and I felt hurt by this and in my 15 year old mind I thought let me have the next best thing and some revenge and sleep with his brother ( 15 years ago now) . It was stupid and I regret it and I don’t even really remember it. A few years later. The crush messages me, we start talking again, I come clean and he hates me. Year later, we talk again, he can’t get over that I did and again stops talking to me. - current day - we’ve been talking every day for over 2 months now, we’ve gotten extremely close but not met yet and he says he has now gotten over the situation and I’m starting to completely fall for him all over again and I’m scared he will become not okay with it further down the line. Does anyone have any positive experiences with any similar situations? I really really really want this to work out and need some hope.

My friends i decided to go padel last week friday and the day before i asked one of my friend (dave) if he can pick me up as i didnt have car.

He said he will but on the day 20 mins before the session started that guy went to get a haircut and then when i called him said wait 10 mins then when i called him he said go with someone else. I find that really disrespectful. I spoke to my friends (ryan) and said this is the issue and one guy said “you are a grown man you can make your way” but i have agreed upon with dave that he will pick me up. He ended up leaving without picking me and i ended up taking uber. I decided not to talk to any of them.

Am i overreacting? Please tell me

For context, i am in a group of 6 friends (me included in the 6), i would say im the one that got everybody together and like as good friends. That was in 7th grade. In my country, the schools are from 1st-7th, 8th-10th, 11th-13th. Im now in 10th grade (newly 16 years) and i feel like 2 guys in our group have started distancing themselves from me.

I have noticed that towards the end of 9th grade and start of 10th grade, one of my friends started talking less to me, almost trying to like ignore me. When school is over, the same friend doesnt mind to go with me from school, but we dont really talk much when going home. I have tried asking him questions before, but he always answers with an answer that wont hold up the conversation. This same friend got asked by some girls in class if me and him are even best friends, and he took some time before answering, and still did not say yes. This happened while i was listening and while he was looking me in my eyes. He tried to laugh it off, so did i but i did not forget this at all. This happened around a month ago. I also tried to be nice and engage a bit with him today, sent him a video that i know he would laugh at, just left me on read.

Another friend of mine, also tries to somewhat ignore me, talks to me sometimes and does start conversations at school, but not like he did before. At the same time, this friend does talk to me more than the other friend. We both like working out, so we sometimes talk about that, that happens around once or twice a week.

The 2 i have now mentioned are very good friends among eachother, they hang out very often and go talk alone sometimes when the group is talking together. I used to hang out with these guys sometimes, play games, but now i barely have contact with them outside of school. I dont know what i have done wrong.

Since late 8th grade, i have tried to focus alot on my sport, cause i am trying to go pro. Since that, i have not been really invited to any events that the whole group has been a part of. I was once at practice, while the whole group was at a sports bar watching a football match. If i was invited, i would have skipped the practice and came to spend time with them. At this point, i feel like i have made better friends through my sport in some years than i have at school, even though i have been with these guys for 9 years now.

For next year, we switch schools from the current one. I am signed up to the school with the 2 guys i just talked about, and one other guy that i am going to a concert with, later on in the year. I kind of regret signing up for the school that i did sign up for, and kind of wish that i signed up with the other 2 guys instead, cause i feel like i can start conversations with them much easier than the rest of the group.

What am i supposed to do in this situation?
I apologise if something is not clear, but just ask if there are any questions about what i have written or in general.

The conversation started on this subreddit on Saturday and this is what happened after I confronted her.

I (M23) met my girlfriend (F23) while I was in college and we had been dating for about 8 months. Everything had been great at first but things changed half way through our relationship. She found out I was looking at anime and animations on instagram. Some had sexual tones to it but no nudity. It was not hentai, weirdo stuff, or pornographic at all. Just creator stuff on instagram. She blew up when she found out and a week long argument followed. After that I was hopeful that things would get better and the love would come back to our relationship but it didn’t.

I had just finished college before that argument and we went to my home state and moved in together. Things continued to get worse though. All her trust for me was gone. She would go through my phone almost daily, she would question who I talked to when we were apart and who I followed on instagram, she didn’t want me to talk to family or friends for relationship advice but she could talk to hers anytime. She would get extremely upset with me over small things. It took a toll on me. I had to cut all ties with any female friends from college to keep her comfortable. I’m not a cheater. I would never do anything like that but she treated me like one regardless. I felt like I was walking on ice around her to keep her happy. One step out of line led to an argument. There’s more to it but I would type here forever.

We were fighting almost daily and it got to a point that she was trying to threaten me financially and emotionally. Over the weekend I finally stood up for myself and told her how I felt. I told her that my family was concerned for me and I didn’t like being treated like this. She can’t tell me what I can and can’t do or who I can and can’t talk to. She can’t blow up on me over small inconveniences or threaten me. It was a bad argument that involved a lot of yelling. Eventually she picked up her phone and I assumed she was just gonna call her family so I walked out. When I came back in a few minutes later I found out she was calling the police and said she I was yelling at her and she needed help. I couldn’t believe it. I just opened the door and asked her to leave which she did. The police never showed up but I was broken. I would never assault her or force her to be there. I couldn’t fathom the idea of doing anything to her. I loved her and would always do everything for her. My whole life could have been ended over a false accusation.

Yesterday she left to go back to her home state. She said I was cruel and my family was crazy before blocking me on everything. I’m heartbroken. I still love her but those last few months were so hard to go through. I was being emotionally tortured for months and it all ended with the police being called on me. However deep down I still love her and part of me wants her back. I feel terrible inside and I’m so lost. Does this relationship need to be let go?

i met his guy in the summer last year it was long distance and yes i get it’s hard and all that but i wanted to make it try anyways fast forward to October last year.. i go over on the boat to see him and finally meet him after months online i meet his family, his mum,dad, and siblings and became close with his sisters
we did have sex and kiss and slept in the same bed for a week and bit. after everything i left to go back home it was every emotional day anyways a month or so later he starts acting distant then he ends it with me and says he can’t do long distance and it’s not far on me and him etc so i’m quite upset and he blocks me on everything bear in mind we said we would still stay friends. then a couple months later i still miss him and i’m still quite close with his family friend and i tell her i want to message him and i still miss him and she has ago at me and says he doesn’t want anything to do with me etc etc but she talks about this guy all the time she been off and on with and i havent once had ago or said anything rude towards her and even now i still miss him and i genuinely don’t know what to do because his siblings want me to come over again and see them.

So I grew up in the suburbs, most of my life and recently have proved to the inner city and and like the happy year I’ve been here there’s probably a domestic once or twice a month in the apartment building. I left today to go let someone in to the building in a large man was fighting with his girlfriend or wife who is not only significantly smaller, but about 2.5 feet shorter then Him. They were parked in the middle of the street with both their cars black in the road and she pushed him so he grabbed her shoulders and threw her against the car and I sat from a distance.” Hey guys probably not a good idea to be doing that out here.” More referring to the male like dude like this. Don’t look good like if a cop drives by you you’re going in no matter what. Or a video of it gets out. But anyways, he instantly let go of her and like doesn’t say anything, and then she turns to me and starts yelling, saying she can defend herself and I politely start trying to tell her im sure he was ready to beat her ass (guy is driving away at this point) and she keeps yelling mind your own business. Finally I got made and I told her you know what your right I should have let him beat your ass I definitely can see why he’d want to

Am I in the wrong for interfering