u/The_SunFlower0

AITA
So for context I’m a 16 year old female and my boyfriend is also 17, we’re Juniors in high school and have known each other since 8th grade. I’ve been smoking weed regularly since I was 14 years old because it helps with my anxiety. When I don’t I’m so anxious and paranoid that I jump at the slightest sudden sound. He smokes just because he wants to. He sneaks out of his house at night to go smoke with friends at a park. His dad has grounded him for it several times before. My parents know I smoke. A few weeks ago he took me on a date and while I was leaving he and his dad were at my door, and his dad yelled at me that we better not be smoking weed in here and that I better not be supplying it. His dad doesn’t know I smoke. But my house smells like weed because my dad smokes heavily and very day as I only smoke once or twice a week at home over the weekend when I don’t have to do anything. My boyfriend is getting stoned at school and most days of the week. Personally I don’t like him smoking weed because he becomes mean to me and I’ve made that clear to him. I don’t want to make it an “I’m smarter than you” argument but I’m an AP (Advanced Placement) student and enrolled in community college. He is failing majority of his class and has been since we’ve met. I think I’m safer and smarter about it and he’s evening recklessly because he’s doing it at school and has gotten caught. After his dad yelled at me because of his habits I told my boyfriend if he keeps smoking he and I will have problems. Am I a hypocrite?

To be clear I don’t have an issue necessarily with him smoking I have an issue with his recklessness. He’s smoking at school, getting caught, sneaking out, any lying about it. I told him we’d have problems after his dad accused ME of being the problem and encouraging it.

So for context I’m a 16 year old female and my mom is a 33 year old drug addict who’s barely around. My dad is 33 and has had full custody of me and my little sister 13 since I was 8.
In August of 2025 I needed to go to the hospital for an ovarian cyst, my mom took me because my dad needed to work. On Thursday night I started to have similar symptoms and pains and informed my dad when it became hard for me to walk. He said I should go to the hospital and called my mom and asked her to take me. She said she would and she picked me up drove me to the hospital and we parked in the parking lot for 20 minutes before she decided she didn’t want to sit there all night since the waiting room was full. She asked me if she could get my heating pads, medication and bring me back in the morning, I agreed. The next morning (Friday May 1st of 2026) I messaged her and told her the pain was still bad. And at 10:19 am she told me she needed to go to Tempe for her car but then she’d take me to the hospital. At 2:03pm I told it my lower right side of my stomach still really hurt, and I felt dizzy. She told me to take my temperature and it was 96.2. I took it twice and told her. She insisted I didn’t know how to properly take my temperature and then stopped messaging me. She picked up my little sister and older brother from school since that’s the only day a week she does pick us up. She drove them back to my dad’s and after hanging out for 30 minutes she left with my brother to go to my grandmas. She hadn’t checked on me or talked to me the whole time she was there. At 5:00 pm I called my friends mom and asked her to drive me to the hospital because at this point I was crying in pain and had been begging my mom for 10 hours to take me and my dad was at work since he works from 8am to 11pm Friday and Saturday. My friend’s mom picked me up and I messaged my sister to lock the door, because I was going to the hospital. I didn’t tell my sister who was taking me. My friend’s mom drove me to the hospital and stayed with me for 9 hours while I had an IV, and ultrasound and other things done to me. I also didn’t tell my mom I was going to the hospital, either way she hadn’t called or texted or come seen me in the hospital the whole 9 hours I was there. When I was being discharged the doctors told me it was likely I had a condition called PCOS. It explained why I got ovarian cysts, hadn’t had a period in almost a year but also meant I was infertile. They told me to make an appointment at a gynecologist to get more information and tests. I was discharged at 1am and I crashed at my friend’s house. My dad had called to check on me while I was in the hospital and so did my friends. It’s important to note my dad told my mom I was in the hospital. When my mom found out she messaged my sister to ask who took me, she said she didn’t know. Which was true because I didn’t tell her. Now it’s Sunday and I’m back at my dad’s, and my mom is messaging my little sister asking what the hospital said, I told her to say she didn’t know as neither went to the hospital with me. (I didn’t expect my sister to go) my mom insisted my sister knew what they had said, I did tell my sister but I asked her to not tell her since she had refused to take me. Now my sister and I aren’t telling our mom what happened at the hospital. Am I in the wrong?