u/Cultural-Medium8706

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having communication problems in my relationship and i came to realized that it ain’t the fight that’s the problem it’s a pattern because how the argument s are being handled. we hurt each other and im sure i hurt her. and we still haven’t came back to each other after this argument and right now im just getting silence. so things are getting serious because i have love for her but im gettin silence so there is not any respect. i feel sad and uncomfortable when there is no respect. it’s gotten hard and i dont know.

tldr: dated since 7th grade 5 years, on/off

Had a big argument. i said “I’m done with this” (meaning the convo). She said “I’m done with you.” i apologized and tried to fix it without actually talking it through with her n she had complained about before she said this “you act like nothing happened”
i realize now that the real issue isn’t the fight, but the pattern of how conflicts were handled over time. It’s been a whole month of no contact. i reached out, she didn’t respond.

During the silence she reposted TikToks as if she is still in a relationship, and she posted things that made me think she might moved on. At the same time, she stopped posting things that used to bother you, which to me felt like a small sign of respect ?

I started dating this girl in 7th grade. I have no one irl to talk to about this.

I'm 17 years old now, so it's been around just 5 years of being on and off. even when we ddid break up before we never really stayed apart for long. the longest we ever went was 3 months, and we always ended up reconnecting. and we recently reconnected after 2 months and its been a year now since that.

recently we had a argument. during the argument I said "I'm done with this" and I meant I was done with the conversation, but she replied "I'm done with you" I also said I needed space. and gave her a option if she just wants to talk when she calms down. then later I also said I would respect her space than I apologized for my part in the argument. which she didn't respond to. the message before that was the last message that she responded to.

I tried to fix things by apologizing I reached out a day later even a week later and so. I tried to fix it by apologizing and just moving on which is how I'm use to handling conflict. she had previously told me that I ted to " act like nothing happened at all" after arguments and now I realize she is right. and I probably wouldn't have realized without space to reflect unless I'm told my behavior specifically. I was apologizing and that's really it.

I tried to reach out a few times but she didn't respond it's been a month of no contact. stupidly I reached out before doing a lot of reflecting and I reached out doing the apology thing. I feel like maybe I could have said I'm here when you wanna talk and then when we talk and figure something out then I can save my apology for then ya know.
I realized It seems like she's bread crumbing me definitely because she is reposting stuff online. that seems like it has something to do with our relationship. and like about other people so it made me feel like there a another guy. at the same time I noticed after the no contact she stopped posting things that use to bother me after I told her that's why I unfollowed her on there and I took that as a small sign she is showing respect ?

I been trying to figure out if she still likes me or something or if she is avoidant and got overheated or if it's just another thing where we eventually reconnect. I been thinking its how we handled the argument is the problem ebcuade its a pattern she said that I been doing. I understand why this might of upset her and that's why she could be choosing silence and not reconnecting with me not bc she stopped caring and moved on t o another guy.

I just don't know what to do. like her bday is coming up its in just 14 days and I don't know weather to even send her a happy birthday text or not and just let it go. I feel embarassed sending those texts not gonna lie its because I failed but yea. Im wondering will she come back was what we talked about really real? like our future/ is this the end will she come back??? i miss her and i want her back

tldr: dated since 7th grade 5 years, on/off

Had a big argument. i said “I’m done with this” (meaning the convo). She said “I’m done with you.” i apologized and tried to fix it without actually talking it through with her n she had complained about before she said this “you act like nothing happened”
i realize now that the real issue isn’t the fight, but the pattern of how conflicts were handled over time. It’s been a whole month of no contact. i reached out, she didn’t respond.

During the silence she reposted TikToks as if she is still in a relationship, and she posted things that made me think she might moved on. At the same time, she stopped posting things that used to bother you, which to me felt like a small sign of respect ?

I started dating this girl in 7th grade. I have no one irl to talk to about this.

I'm 17 years old now, so it's been around just 5 years of being on and off. even when we ddid break up before we never really stayed apart for long. the longest we ever went was 3 months, and we always ended up reconnecting. and we recently reconnected after 2 months and its been a year now since that.

recently we had a argument. during the argument I said "I'm done with this" and I meant I was done with the conversation, but she replied "I'm done with you" I also said I needed space. and gave her a option if she just wants to talk when she calms down. then later I also said I would respect her space than I apologized for my part in the argument. which she didn't respond to. the message before that was the last message that she responded to.

I tried to fix things by apologizing I reached out a day later even a week later and so. I tried to fix it by apologizing and just moving on which is how I'm use to handling conflict. she had previously told me that I ted to " act like nothing happened at all" after arguments and now I realize she is right. and I probably wouldn't have realized without space to reflect unless I'm told my behavior specifically. I was apologizing and that's really it.

I tried to reach out a few times but she didn't respond it's been a month of no contact. stupidly I reached out before doing a lot of reflecting and I reached out doing the apology thing. I feel like maybe I could have said I'm here when you wanna talk and then when we talk and figure something out then I can save my apology for then ya know.
I realized It seems like she's bread crumbing me definitely because she is reposting stuff online. that seems like it has something to do with our relationship. and like about other people so it made me feel like there a another guy. at the same time I noticed after the no contact she stopped posting things that use to bother me after I told her that's why I unfollowed her on there and I took that as a small sign she is showing respect ?

I been trying to figure out if she still likes me or something or if she is avoidant and got overheated or if it's just another thing where we eventually reconnect. I been thinking its how we handled the argument is the problem ebcuade its a pattern she said that I been doing. I understand why this might of upset her and that's why she could be choosing silence and not reconnecting with me not bc she stopped caring and moved on t o another guy.

I just don't know what to do. like her bday is coming up its in just 14 days and I don't know weather to even send her a happy birthday text or not and just let it go. I feel embarassed sending those texts not gonna lie its because I failed but yea. Im wondering will she come back was what we talked about really real? like our future/ is this the end will she come back??? i miss her and i want her back

tldr: dated since 7th grade 5 years, on/off

Had a big argument. i said “I’m done with this” (meaning the convo). She said “I’m done with you.” i apologized and tried to fix it without actually talking it through with her n she had complained about before she said this “you act like nothing happened”
i realize now that the real issue isn’t the fight, but the pattern of how conflicts were handled over time. It’s been a whole month of no contact. i reached out, she didn’t respond.

During the silence she reposted TikToks as if she is still in a relationship, and she posted things that made me think she might moved on. At the same time, she stopped posting things that used to bother you, which to me felt like a small sign of respect ?

I started dating this girl in 7th grade. I have no one irl to talk to about this.

I'm 17 years old now, so it's been around just 5 years of being on and off. even when we ddid break up before we never really stayed apart for long. the longest we ever went was 3 months, and we always ended up reconnecting. and we recently reconnected after 2 months and its been a year now since that.

recently we had a argument. during the argument I said "I'm done with this" and I meant I was done with the conversation, but she replied "I'm done with you" I also said I needed space. and gave her a option if she just wants to talk when she calms down. then later I also said I would respect her space than I apologized for my part in the argument. which she didn't respond to. the message before that was the last message that she responded to.

I tried to fix things by apologizing I reached out a day later even a week later and so. I tried to fix it by apologizing and just moving on which is how I'm use to handling conflict. she had previously told me that I ted to " act like nothing happened at all" after arguments and now I realize she is right. and I probably wouldn't have realized without space to reflect unless I'm told my behavior specifically. I was apologizing and that's really it.

I tried to reach out a few times but she didn't respond it's been a month of no contact. stupidly I reached out before doing a lot of reflecting and I reached out doing the apology thing. I feel like maybe I could have said I'm here when you wanna talk and then when we talk and figure something out then I can save my apology for then ya know.
I realized It seems like she's bread crumbing me definitely because she is reposting stuff online. that seems like it has something to do with our relationship. and like about other people so it made me feel like there a another guy. at the same time I noticed after the no contact she stopped posting things that use to bother me after I told her that's why I unfollowed her on there and I took that as a small sign she is showing respect ?

I been trying to figure out if she still likes me or something or if she is avoidant and got overheated or if it's just another thing where we eventually reconnect. I been thinking its how we handled the argument is the problem ebcuade its a pattern she said that I been doing. I understand why this might of upset her and that's why she could be choosing silence and not reconnecting with me not bc she stopped caring and moved on t o another guy.

I just don't know what to do. like her bday is coming up its in just 14 days and I don't know weather to even send her a happy birthday text or not and just let it go. I feel embarassed sending those texts not gonna lie its because I failed but yea. Im wondering will she come back was what we talked about really real? like our future/ is this the end will she come back???she is really like my best friend (for a girl)

edit: fixed the text

I started dating this girl in 7th grade. I have no one irl to talk to about this. I'm 17 years old now, so it's been around just 5 years of being on and off. even when we ddid break up before we never really stayed apart for long. the longest we ever went was 3 months, and we always ended up reconnecting. and we recently reconnected after 2 months and its been a year now since that. recently we had a argument. during the argument I said "I'm done with this" and I meant I was done with the conversation, but she replied "I'm done with you" I also said I needed space. and gave her a option if she just wants to talk when she calms down. then later I also said I would respect her space than I apologized for my part in the argument. which she didn't respond to. the message before that was the last message that she responded to. I tried to fix things by apologizing I reached out a day later even a week later and so. I tried to fix it by apologizing and just moving on which is how I'm use to handling conflict. she had previously told me that I ted to " act like nothing happened at all" after arguments and now I realize she is right. and I probably wouldn't have realized without space to reflect unless I'm told my behavior specifically. I was apologizing and that's really it. I tried to reach out a few times but she didn't respond it's been a month of no contact. stupidly I reached out before doing a lot of reflecting and I reached out doing the apology thing. I feel like maybe I could have said I'm here when you wanna talk and then when we talk and figure something out then I can save my apology for then ya know. I realized It seems like she's bread crumbing me definitely because she is reposting stuff online. that seems like it has something to do with our relationship. and like about other people so it made me feel like there a another guy. at the same time I noticed after the no contact she stopped posting things that use to bother me after I told her that's why I unfollowed her on there and I took that as a small sign she is showing respect ? I been trying to figure out if she still likes me or something or if she is avoidant and got overheated or if it's just another thing where we eventually reconnect. I been thinking its how we handled the argument is the problem ebcuade its a pattern she said that I been doing. I understand why this might of upset her and that's why she could be choosing silence and not reconnecting with me not bc she stopped caring and moved on t o another guy. I just don't know what to do. like her bday is coming up its in just 14 days and I don't know weather to even send her a happy birthday text or not and just let it go. I feel embarassed sending those texts not gonna lie its because I failed but yea. Im wondering will she come back was what we talked about really real? like our future/ is this the end will she come back???

I started dating this girl in 7th grade. I have no one irl to talk to about this. I'm 17 years old now, so it's been around just 5 years of being on and off. even when we ddid break up before we never really stayed apart for long. the longest we ever went was 3 months, and we always ended up reconnecting. and we recently reconnected after 2 months and its been a year now since that. recently we had a argument. during the argument I said "I'm done with this" and I meant I was done with the conversation, but she replied "I'm done with you" I also said I needed space. and gave her a option if she just wants to talk when she calms down. then later I also said I would respect her space than I apologized for my part in the argument. which she didn't respond to. the message before that was the last message that she responded to. I tried to fix things by apologizing I reached out a day later even a week later and so. I tried to fix it by apologizing and just moving on which is how I'm use to handling conflict. she had previously told me that I ted to " act like nothing happened at all" after arguments and now I realize she is right. and I probably wouldn't have realized without space to reflect unless I'm told my behavior specifically. I was apologizing and that's really it. I tried to reach out a few times but she didn't respond it's been a month of no contact. stupidly I reached out before doing a lot of reflecting and I reached out doing the apology thing. I feel like maybe I could have said I'm here when you wanna talk and then when we talk and figure something out then I can save my apology for then ya know. I realized It seems like she's bread crumbing me definitely because she is reposting stuff online. that seems like it has something to do with our relationship. and like about other people so it made me feel like there a another guy. at the same time I noticed after the no contact she stopped posting things that use to bother me after I told her that's why I unfollowed her on there and I took that as a small sign she is showing respect ? I been trying to figure out if she still likes me or something or if she is avoidant and got overheated or if it's just another thing where we eventually reconnect. I been thinking its how we handled the argument is the problem ebcuade its a pattern she said that I been doing. I understand why this might of upset her and that's why she could be choosing silence and not reconnecting with me not bc she stopped caring and moved on t o another guy. I just don't know what to do. like her bday is coming up its in just 14 days and I don't know weather to even send her a happy birthday text or not and just let it go. I feel embarassed sending those texts not gonna lie its because I failed but yea. Im wondering will she come back was what we talked about really real? like our future/ is this the end will she come back???

people always call me bi polar but i am not diagnosed with it. im 17 f. bro this person my mom is dating would trash my room looking for things and leave it for me to clean when ever she as mad and assumed i did something wrong. my 2 year old baby cousin threw a toy at me and hit me which is normal for a toddler, and i tossed the toy across the room. bru i just dont know what to do.
the person my mom is dating is narcissistic and bi polar. i just don’t know if this correlates

tldr

gfs bday in 12 days dating 5years since 7th grade. had a argument i asked for space. no contact for one month. tbh i did reach out and i called once a couple weeks ago but i figured i should give her more space reach out or no?

can someone make my decision? her birthday is in 12 days. we have been dating for 5 years we started dating in 7th grade. we got into a argument and i started saying i needed space then we argued some more . after the argument i apologized and said ill respect your space. i did reach out a few times after that and she didn’t pick up. last time i reached out was 2 weeks ago. we haven’t talked in one month
so far it seems 50/50 people are saying move on and the other 50 is saying yeah say happy birthday.
i need someone to help me make the decision, is it over and don’t reach out or do i say happy birthday. i just don’t know what to do.

so anyone have advice?

by the way this is a positive post

struggling with no contact. my partner of 5 years since middle school we have periods of no contact. we will be good for atleast 11 months then we will have one argument and go no contact for ( the longest it’s been is 3 months) i hear that this is something that happens with them? we are still high schoolers and no we don’t go to the same school anymore i moved away. I don’t have hope she will come back. She hasn’t picked up any calls or texts. it’s legit no contact.
we have been going strong we talked about getting married and all those things since we were kids now all that is playing out life is going just how we planned it. everything is going good besides the relationship aspect.

Dating

i use to check atleast 20 times a week i’m on week 4 and i check atleast once a day now. when will this stop i have other things i could be focused on but she is just stuck in my mind because it feels unfinished

sorry if this is a lot and all over the place. im(17)and a old friend reached out tonight we’re supposed to call tonight. reason he’s a old friend because i cut off all of my old friends because i use to steal and get in trouble with them. and he’s always been a bit more mature than the rest of my old friend’s. it’s been a year since i’ve been getting in trouble and since i have stole. i’ve been to therapy during the time i cut everyone off. bpd might be something to do with this. but i was dating this girl and completely turned my life around she made me a better person even tho we only talk sometimes now. i wanted to be a better person for her. i was wondering if anyone’s been through anything similar.

honestly this doesn’t have much to do about bpd but it does because she’s my fp. and has been since we were in middle school. and everything is feeling super intense

honestly he is cool besides the drama but i have a lot to lose and don’t want to get pulled into the bad stuff again. i’ve completely changed in a year. i use to be a piece of shi but it took one girl and a lot of self reflection work and therapy. im still working on myself too.

do i stay away?

if he asks me to do something risky do i say i don’t do those type of things?

do i ghost him?