u/achillespatient

To make a long story short - I (37M) got back into dating a couple of months ago, after a couple years alone following a bad breakup and severe injury. A month ago I met two girls a couple days apart that I really hit it off with. We have been on roughly the same number of dates, although things have moved faster physically with one (only recently). There is a lot of intellectual, emotional and physical compatibility with both of these girls, which is making this very difficult.

I am having serious issues deciding between the two, and want to make that decision sooner than later, to avoid hurting them needlessly. I legitemately never thought that this kind of situation was possible, as it was always very clear to me who to pursue. I am having pretty severe panic over the thought of having to hurt one of them like this, because I can tell that they are falling for me. I am not a player-type that wants to date multiple girls at once, and am looking for a meaingful long term relationship.

Any tips on how to move forward would be much appreciated. How have you handled this in the past? How did it work out? How long is it acceptable to date both before going exclusive?Most importantly - how did you decide? The advice I have gotten from my personal network is ALL OVER THE PLACE - ranging from "it's OK to date nonexclusively for 2-3 months before deciding" to "you need to pick as soon as things start getting physical." I am trending towards the latter. Going to make a decision in the next week, depending on how things go over the weekend, although I'd like to gauge sexual compatibility with the other because that could tip the scales.

Yeah, I know, steak too juicy... lobster too buttery lol. I get it, but I am very mentally unwell over this and would love some support if you can.

To make a long story short - I (37M) got back into dating a couple of months ago, after a couple years alone following a bad breakup and severe injury. A month ago I met two girls a couple days apart that I really hit it off with. We have been on roughly the same number of dates, although things have moved faster physically with one (only recently). There is a lot of intellectual, emotional and physical compatibility with both of these girls, which is making this very difficult.

I am having serious issues deciding between the two, and want to make that decision sooner than later, to avoid hurting them needlessly. I legitemately never thought that this kind of situation was possible, as it was always very clear to me who to pursue. I am having pretty severe panic over the thought of having to hurt one of them like this, because I can tell that they are falling for me. I am not a player-type that wants to date multiple girls at once, and am looking for a meaingful long term relationship.

Any tips on how to move forward would be much appreciated. How have you handled this in the past? How did it work out? How long is it acceptable to date both before going exclusive?Most importantly - how did you decide? The advice I have gotten from my personal network is ALL OVER THE PLACE - ranging from "it's OK to date nonexclusively for 2-3 months before deciding" to "you need to pick as soon as things start getting physical." I am trending towards the latter. Going to make a decision in the next week, depending on how things go over the weekend, although I'd like to gauge sexual compatibility with the other because that could tip the scales.

Yeah, I know, steak too juicy... lobster too buttery lol. I get it, but I am very mentally unwell over this and would love some support if you can.

To make a long story short - I (37M) got back into dating a couple of months ago, after a couple years alone following a bad breakup and severe injury. A month ago I met two girls a couple days apart that I really hit it off with. We have been on roughly the same number of dates, although things have moved faster physically with one (only recently). There is a lot of intellectual, emotional and physical compatibility with both of these girls, which is making this very difficult.

I am having serious issues deciding between the two, and want to make that decision sooner than later, to avoid hurting them needlessly. I legitemately never thought that this kind of situation was possible, as it was always very clear to me who to pursue. I am having pretty severe panic over the thought of having to hurt one of them like this, because I can tell that they are falling for me. I am not a player-type that wants to date multiple girls at once, and am looking for a meaingful long term relationship.

Any tips on how to move forward would be much appreciated. How have you handled this in the past? How did it work out? How long is it acceptable to date both before going exclusive?Most importantly - how did you decide? The advice I have gotten from my personal network is ALL OVER THE PLACE - ranging from "it's OK to date nonexclusively for 2-3 months before deciding" to "you need to pick as soon as things start getting physical." I am trending towards the latter. Going to make a decision in the next week, depending on how things go over the weekend, although I'd like to gauge sexual compatibility with the other because that could tip the scales.

Yeah, I know, steak too juicy... lobster too buttery lol. I get it, but I am very mentally unwell over this and would love some support if you can.

To make a long story short - I (37M) got back into dating a couple of months ago, after a couple years alone following a bad breakup and severe injury. A month ago I met two girls (37F/29F) a couple days apart that I really hit it off with. We have been on roughly the same number of dates, although things have moved faster physically with one (only recently). There is a lot of intellectual, emotional and physical compatibility with both of these girls, which is making this very difficult.

I am having serious issues deciding between the two, and want to make that decision sooner than later, to avoid hurting them needlessly. I legitemately never thought that this kind of situation was possible, as it was always very clear to me who to pursue. I am having pretty severe panic over the thought of having to hurt one of them like this, because I can tell that they are falling for me. I am not a player-type that wants to date multiple girls at once, and am looking for a meaingful long term relationship.

Any tips on how to move forward would be much appreciated. How have you handled this in the past? How did it work out? How long is it acceptable to date both before going exclusive?Most importantly - how did you decide? The advice I have gotten from my personal network is ALL OVER THE PLACE - ranging from "it's OK to date nonexclusively for 2-3 months before deciding" to "you need to pick as soon as things start getting physical." I am trending towards the latter. Going to make a decision in the next week, depending on how things go over the weekend, although I'd like to gauge sexual compatibility with the other because that could tip the scales.

Yeah, I know, steak too juicy... lobster too buttery lol. I get it, but I am very mentally unwell over this and would love some support if you can.

TLDR: I am dating two very awesome girls and can't decide who to choose because it is not obvious and I have feelings for both. Never experienced this before and very anxious.

To make a long story short - I (37M) got back into dating a couple of months ago, after a couple years alone following a bad breakup and severe injury. A month ago I met two girls a couple days apart that I really hit it off with. We have been on roughly the same number of dates, although things have moved faster physically with one (only recently). There is a lot of intellectual, emotional and physical compatibility with both of these girls, which is making this very difficult.

I am having serious issues deciding between the two, and want to make that decision sooner than later, to avoid hurting them needlessly. I legitemately never thought that this kind of situation was possible, as it was always very clear to me who to pursue. I am having pretty severe panic over the thought of having to hurt one of them like this, because I can tell that they are falling for me. I am not a player-type that wants to date multiple girls at once, and am looking for a meaingful long term relationship.

Any tips on how to move forward would be much appreciated. How have you handled this in the past? How did it work out? How long is it acceptable to date both before going exclusive?Most importantly - how did you decide? The advice I have gotten from my personal network is ALL OVER THE PLACE - ranging from "it's OK to date nonexclusively for 2-3 months before deciding" to "you need to pick as soon as things start getting physical." I am trending towards the latter. Going to make a decision in the next week, depending on how things go over the weekend, although I'd like to gauge sexual compatibility with the other because that could tip the scales.

Yeah, I know, steak too juicy... lobster too buttery lol. I get it, but I am very mentally unwell over this and would love some support if you can.

To make a long story short - I (37M) got back into dating a couple of months ago, after a couple years alone following a bad breakup and severe injury. A month ago I met two girls a couple days apart that I really hit it off with. We have been on roughly the same number of dates, although things have moved faster physically with one (only recently). There is a lot of intellectual, emotional and physical compatibility with both of these girls, which is making this very difficult.

I am having serious issues deciding between the two, and want to make that decision sooner than later, to avoid hurting them needlessly. I legitemately never thought that this kind of situation was possible, as it was always very clear to me who to pursue. I am having pretty severe panic over the thought of having to hurt one of them like this, because I can tell that they are falling for me. I am not a player-type that wants to date multiple girls at once, and am looking for a meaingful long term relationship.

Any tips on how to move forward would be much appreciated. How have you handled this in the past? How did it work out? How long is it acceptable to date both before going exclusive?Most importantly - how did you decide? The advice I have gotten from my personal network is ALL OVER THE PLACE - ranging from "it's OK to date nonexclusively for 2-3 months before deciding" to "you need to pick as soon as things start getting physical." I am trending towards the latter. Going to make a decision in the next week, depending on how things go over the weekend, although I'd like to gauge sexual compatibility with the other because that could tip the scales.

I am really struggling and am reaching out for support because I am in new territory. Making appointment with therapist, but I know you all have a lot of valuable experience, so I’m reaching out now.

I (37M) recently re-entered the dating pool after a few years off due to a bad breakup and a severe injury. I thought I was going to have a lot of problems getting dates because I am a regular guy, and a lot of guys appear to be struggling right now. However, I surprisingly ended up having a lot of success, and landed a lot of dates with very nice people.

About a month ago, I went on two first dates a couple of days apart and hit it off with both girls. I feel that both of them are genuinely compatible in a long-term sense, and are falling for me. I would have stepped out of online dating to pursue either solely if I had not met the other but the dates were like 48 hours apart.

I was hoping that the choice would become more clear, but the choice has been very difficult and it’s time to get exclusive because I don’t want to lead anyone on. I can’t believe it’s not more obvious. I’ve made my decision, but I don’t know how to let the other one down. I’ve never had to walk away from someone promising and willing like this, as opposed to a longer term relationship that clearly didn’t work out.

I know I have to end it so I don’t lead this person on. I don’t want to hurt this person. I don’t want to go into a new relationship having regrets about letting this other person go, even though I think I’m making the right decision. I don’t want this person to hate me even if I don’t think I’m doing anything wrong or dishonest. I’m spiraling and this is impacting my mental health.

Any advice or anecdotes would be much appreciated. I want to handle this responsibly and respectfully, but even at my age, I’ve just never been there. This almost feels as bad as getting dumped.

Please help, and try to take it easy on me. I’m really struggling.

I (37M) recently re-entered the dating pool after a few years off due to a bad breakup and a severe injury. I thought I was going to have a lot of problems getting dates because I am a regular guy, and a lot of guys appear to be struggling right now. However, I surprisingly ended up having a lot of success, and landed a lot of dates with very nice people.

About a month ago, I went on two first dates a couple of days apart and hit it off with both girls. I feel that both of them are genuinely compatible in a long-term sense, and are falling for me. I would have stepped out of online dating to pursue either solely if I had not met the other but the dates were like 48 hours apart.

I was hoping that the choice would become more clear, but the choice has been very difficult and it’s time to get exclusive because I don’t want to lead anyone on. I can’t believe it’s not more obvious. I’ve made my decision, but I don’t know how to let the other one down. I’ve never had to walk away from someone promising and willing like this, as opposed to a longer term relationship that clearly didn’t work out.

Any advice or anecdotes would be much appreciated.

In case it helps: 37M with BP2. 10 years medicated and no recent med changes. Work out daily. 10 years clean of cigarettes. 1 year clean of weed. Infrequent non-problematic drinking and gambling (irregular and event based). No hard drugs. Steady employment in high pressure white collar job.

My last long-term relationship was with someone who was very mentally unwell, so disclosure was very easy because we were both opening up about things, and there was no judgment.

I couple weeks ago, I met a very sweet girl (who doesn’t seem mentally ill) and we have gone on a couple dates. I can tell that things are moving in a more serious direction. Our third date is Thursday night, and if things continue to go well, I want to disclose before date 4. I take things pretty slow, but I want to be upfront with her before things escalate too much. This way she has a fair opportunity to back out if this is not for her, and she does not feel misled. I am scared of how she will react but think early disclosure is the right thing to do.

Any advice on how to handle this? Any help would be much appreciated. This is tough stuff lol.

In case it helps: 37M with BP2. 10 years medicated and no recent med changes. Work out daily. 10 years clean of cigarettes. 1 year clean of weed. Infrequent non-problematic drinking and gambling (irregular and event based). No hard drugs. Steady employment in high pressure white collar job.

My last long-term relationship was with someone who was very mentally unwell, so disclosure was very easy because we were both opening up about things, and there was no judgment.

I couple weeks ago, I met a very sweet girl (who doesn’t seem mentally ill) and we have gone on a couple dates. I can tell that things are moving in a more serious direction. Our third date is Thursday night, and if things continue to go well, I want to disclose before date 4. I take things pretty slow, but I want to be upfront with her before things escalate too much. This way she has a fair opportunity to back out if this is not for her, and she does not feel misled. I am scared of how she will react but think early disclosure is the right thing to do.

Any advice on how to handle this? Any help would be much appreciated. This is tough stuff lol.

In case it helps: 37M with BP2. 10 years medicated and no recent med changes. Work out daily. 10 years clean of cigarettes. 1 year clean of weed. Infrequent non-problematic drinking and gambling (irregular and event based). No hard drugs. Steady employment in high pressure white collar job.

My last long-term relationship was with someone who was very mentally unwell, so disclosure was very easy because we were both opening up about things, and there was no judgment.

I couple weeks ago, I met a very sweet girl (who doesn’t seem mentally ill) and we have gone on a couple dates. I can tell that things are moving in a more serious direction. Our third date is Thursday night, and if things continue to go well, I want to disclose before date 4. I take things pretty slow, but I want to be upfront with her before things escalate too much. This way she has a fair opportunity to back out if this is not for her, and she does not feel misled. I am scared of how she will react but think early disclosure is the right thing to do.

Any advice on how to handle this? Any help would be much appreciated. This is tough stuff lol.

As the title says, I’m (37M) looking to be more proactive with minimizing the impact of my bipolar 2 on my next romantic partner. I just discovered this sub Reddit and it seems like a great place to ask.

Some background about me. My symptoms were very severe throughout my 20s. I got diagnosed in my late 20s, and have been on a mood stabilizer for about a decade. Things never got as bad as they were since then. I put in a lot of work to manage my condition, which is needed because I am a licensed professional with a high stress job. I work out almost every day, quit cigarettes a decade ago, don’t drink regularly (event based), and see a psychiatrist. At times, I see a talk therapist and/or go to a support group, which I would like to make more regular. I was a habitual marijuana smoker for about 20 years, and quit last year, which I think has helped my emotional state. However, I admittedly go through weeks/months where I am depressed or hypomanic.

I have been single for a year after getting out of a 5 year relationship. Amicable breakup. Nothing crazy, just drifted apart and felt like our values were not longer aligned. I don’t cheat, gamble or rage, but I’m sure the depression and anxiety had some impact over the years that I could have been better about.

I had a couple really great dates in the last month and it occurred to me that I could be heading in a serious direction again. I usually disclose my condition before things get too serious, so they don’t feel misled and can get out if it is a deal breaker. That point is coming up in the next couple weeks, so I wanted to ask…

I have a lot of love to give, and I don’t want to mess things up just because I have a health problem. I make an effort to not do too much venting to them, and save that for other outlets. I also really push myself to be more sexually active when I am depressed, so it isn’t as noticeable.

Any advice on how to make this easier on a partner?

I’m enamored with the Lucky Harvey Guilloche chiming watches. Seeing them in the $1,500 to $2500 range. Does anyone own one, that is able to compare it to the fit and finish of other similarly priced Swiss or Japanese watches? I haven’t handled many Chinese watches in this price point.

The enamel dragon ones are cool as well, but that’s a battle for another day lol.

Thanks!