r/pregnant

FTM here.

Before vacation 2 weeks ago we went in for our first ultrasound, estimating between 8-9 weeks. At the time we were actually measuring just shy of 7 weeks. Heartbeat was there, somewhere around 130bpm.

The techs weren't concerned with my travel, we discussed my meds and changes I had already made. Scheduled a follow up in 2 weeks, which was today. Immediately I saw no movement and knew. As the exam continued, she kept asking if I was 'sure' about my dating, where I confirmed it was the dating they gave me at the last appointment. Should have been 8w6d but I was measuring 8w1d. Asked if last time we had a heartbeat, and when I said yes, she sort of glanced away while telling me there wasn't one today.

She had me clean up and said they would take me straight to an exam room. Kept asking me about bleeding, cramping, etc. Had to tell each new face who came in that I didn't have any indicators. Went through all the hoops, scheduled tomorrow's D&C, got my blood taken, managed not to break down until after we got home.

Husband and I had a good mutual cry. It's been coming in waves. Told a few people, told work, have off the next 8 days. It was our first ever, and now our first loss. Cut off all my hair before vacation because it was growing out/fading and since I couldn't do touch ups, I felt like it was the responsible thing. It would be easier to manage through the spring/summer and then still be short by the time we would have a newborn.

I'm sure I'll break down again later, tomorrow, multiple times the next few weeks. We're going to have the genetic testing done so we can maybe have an idea of risks in the future. I'm turning 33 this weekend, it felt like things were falling into place and now I feel like the chance has slipped through my fingers. Who knows, maybe there will be another one, but for now I'm just going to focus on getting through tomorrow and disconnecting from everything for the next week, to prepare for getting the mask in place when I go back to work.

My Baby is almost 4 days old and I love her so much it hurts. I was so scared of my c section but let me tell you: I‘d do it 1000 times for her.

There is no need to be scared of c section ❤️ it was the weirdest but most amazing experience of my life and my daughter is the most precious angel

Whyyyy do people say the most fucked up things to pregnant women?

My FIL asks if I’m going to breastfeed.

Me: “if I can, I will, if I can’t, I won’t.”

Him: (leans to my husband) “talk her into it so you don’t have to wake up at 3am for feedings.”

Me: “I’ll probably wake him up either way.”

Him: “but he’ll have to work the next day.”

Me: “and I’ll have to care for a child all the next day.”

Him: “oh, you’ll have all day to sleep.”

Me: (fuming) “do not upset a pregnant woman.”

HOW ARE YOU ALL DEALING WITH THIS.

Sometimes people are joking but like… you’re. Not. Funny.

My brother congratulating my husband on having a DD for the next 9 months as if that’s all I’m here for. My other relative saying that my husband is going to start looking forward to mondays now.

It’s pissing me off and driving me nuts.

Anyone else?

Any recommendations?

I’m having a baby this summer, and found out that my sister decided to pause vaccinating her little one after “reading into it”. She said she canceled the 12 month vaccines and I assume she’s canceling the ones around a year and a half as well. How do I approach this, especially in regard to her coming over to visit? I just don’t know how to approach having her two little ones visit my new baby. My degree is in public health and I can’t shake my concerns. I don’t want to come off as judgmental or dismissive of her own fears around vaccines, but I need to protect my vulnerable baby. I also have a toddler myself, and I want our kids to be close, but not at my newborn’s risk.

Feeling guilty that I do not feel the desire to breastfeed. My 2 sisters who have children are both so passionate about breastfeeding, and all of the pregnant woman or newer moms in my life are the same way. I feel like something is wrong with me because I do not really want to. I have a plan to try, and if I still don’t love it or can’t produce I am ok with formula feeding. I talked to my OB about it, and he said formula has come a long way and even if my baby just gets colostrum at first and then we switch to formula, that would be good. Idk it just seems like a lot of work, it grosses me out to think about it (sorry if that’s blunt) and the pumping aspect of it just really scares me. I’m afraid that it will hurt, I don’t want to be the sole feeder, and I am also scared I will be anxious about not know exactly how much baby ate.

Our son is 1.5, we wanted a second baby, everything in our life has been set up for 2 babies. But as they say...you plan and God laughs.

We are having twins, so now we will have 3 kids.

I'm genuinely worried. I have to get a new car, twice the carseats, we were planning to let the 2 kids share a room for a few years till we get a bigger place but can you do that with 3??

My son still doesn't sleep through the night and now I have twins coming....what if they are equally shit sleepers? Maybe I should have stopped with our first....

How do I load 3 kids....how do I save them in an emergency. I wanted one kid for each arm where does the third go do I have to pick favorites in a tsunami?? Will my son feel less special next to the wonder twins? What if I become a shit mom because there are too many kids for me to handle.

My family keeps telling me I'll be a great mother of 3 and it'll all work out, but things only ever work out because I WORK THEM OUT. And I cant stop this constant mild panicking.

Everyone is trying to soothe me and call the twins a blessing. But I'm stressing out to much to appreciate this blessing.

Also HOW BIG AM I GONNA GET? I keep seeing reels of these ginormous pregnant twin moms and I'm greatly concerned how Ill survive.

Anyone else panic? Im only 9 weeks I can't do this for the next 31.

My husband (31M) and I (30F) have been married for 3 years. For a long time, we’ve gone back and forth about having kids — some days we wanted them, other days we weren’t sure at all.

Last month, we kind of spontaneously decided to try… and I got pregnant on the first try. I honestly didn’t expect it to happen that fast.

Now I’m completely overwhelmed. My husband is too. We’ve told a few people already, but deep down I feel so conflicted. Some days I feel excited, but other days I feel like I’ve made a huge mistake. We are in a great position financially, physically and emotionally to have a child but I’m so fucking scared.

I’ve even had moments where I think about avoiding the whole situation (getting an abortion) and telling people I miscarried, which makes me feel awful just typing out. The anxiety has been intense — like nothing I’ve ever experienced before. It doesn’t feel like me at all.

What’s confusing is that growing up, I always wanted kids. I even work in education and spend all day with children… but for some reason, this feels completely different, and instead of excitement, I mostly feel fear.

I guess I’m just looking to know… am I alone in feeling like this?

I’m 39 weeks today and feeling a little consumed by the discomfort of late pregnancy. So instead of wallowing and talking about all of the things that suck about being pregnant, I’d love to hear some of the things that you will miss about this experience so I can try to soak in my final days!

Here are a few of mine:

-Random strangers picking things up for me. It makes me a little emotional every time even though it’s such a small gesture

-Feeling my baby move and kick! This one causes me a lot of anxiety most of the time but I’m really trying to appreciate just how cool it is to feel her in me.

-No migraines during pregnancy! I’ve had chronic migraines since I was a literal toddler and they have completely gone away for my entire pregnancy. It’s been genuinely life-altering

-Feeling neutral about my body. Body image is so weird and I’ve always been a bit bigger. I’ve definitely had some moments of discomfort with the way my body looks during pregnancy but the vast majority of the time I’m just so grateful to my body for growing her.

I’m excited to see what I start missing once I do actually give birth!

I’m currently 34 weeks and I’ve been having nausea, swelling of my feet and legs, vision changes, and severe headaches but my OB keeps telling me it’s normal and I can’t have preeclampsia because I have low blood pressure. My vision changes include floaters, vision loss, black spots in my vision. I feel so crazy when they just blow off my issues and honestly it makes me sob so much because why aren’t they listening to me when I’m feeling like this so often.

I’m a little over 12 weeks and i’ve had morning sickness since about 8 weeks. I know morning sickness can happen at any time of the day, but i mostly always feel sick at night. I wake up full of energy and with a big appetite but once it gets around 6-7pm i start to feel so shitty. I get nauseous, headaches and my fatigue hits me hard. That’s around the time my toddler eats dinner and it’s soooo hard for me to get up and cook something because of the nausea. I sometimes even throw up and i’ll feel better for a few minutes then i’m right back to feeing nauseous 😭😭 Anyone else like this? 😅

Just screaming into the void! After my first pregnancy ended in a MMC at 9weeks in November 2025, this is HUGE blessing! I am SO EXCITED!!! Any cute suggestions on how to tell my husband?

6 weeks 4 days.

You either feel bad, with heartburn and nausea and aching boobs and cramping, or you feel kind of fine and normal and start to obsess over whether that means your baby is okay or not.

My boobs seem less achy today and I haven't had any nausea (but I did eat early and took my Adderall today, so maybe that's working on the nausea) and even though we just saw the heartbeat and got a thumbs up on normal development on Saturday, I'm feeling anxious about if my little sweet pea is okay.

I know symptoms fluctuate and that maybe I'm just having an "easy" pregnancy, and I'm still early, but I can't help but wish I felt more obviously pregnant 😭 anyone else in my boat?

Very newly pregnant (yay!) and holy guacamole I am so tired all the time and keep forgetting dumb things (I’m a teacher and have done stuff like calling kids I have had for years by the wrong name.) Any advice for keeping energy up and clearing some of the brain fog? I don’t want to just blurt it out to my students that I’m foggy because I’m pregnant, but the school year is almost done and I’m trying to stay strong until summer.

Things I am doing: eating small amounts of healthy food often to try and keep the energy up, going to bed early, and drinking lots of water, it just still doesn’t feel like enough with how high pressure my job is.

So STOP asking if I feel any different today than I did yesterday. Just leave me alone about it! 😭

So I'm a FTM, and I've been finding it very annoying since the very beginning of my pregnancy when people start giving me unsolicited advice or start comparing me to their pregnancies or other people they knows pregnancies. For example, my older sister (who, btw, I never told I was pregnant already knew, which pissed me off low-key) and her husband started telling me that I couldn't travel by car to another state because her husband's friend's wife started bleeding while she was traveling from Boston to NYC. I told them that they needed to stop projecting and comparing my pregnancy to others peoples pregnancies because we're two different people.

I'm starting to realize that when my partner, his family, or just anyone in general is giving me unsolicited advice or tells me things that I should or shouldn't do, I dismiss them, fake the funk in the conversation or just tune them out. is it wrong of me to do this? I just feel like unless it's my doctor I just don't really feel like hearing it.

Today we had our 32 week growth scan. Our tech knew we don’t want to know the gender. She was taking measurements and accidentally took a wrong measurement, so she switched over to the measurement screen to delete it. My eyes caught “sex: female” on the upper right hand corner of the screen. Did I just ruin my gender surprise or was that label referring to me?

Also when she was looking at my amniotic fluid, it looked like I saw a little penis when she froze the screen for measurements. Could have been the umbilical cord?

I feel like at this point I should just go into these ultrasounds blindfolded lol.

Just wanted a place to vent about how I’m feeling. I’m 10 days postpartum, so I know the hormones are ruling my feelings. Super long rant.

To start, my mom and I have never had a good relationship, she has zero emotional intelligence, she is selfish, and avoids taking responsibility for her actions.

Since I was a child I’ve been her emotional support, she has involved me in very grown up matters and always relied on me to make her feel better. She loves being the center of attention, and she loves to make me the butt of all the jokes.

Still, she has good qualities, and I was having her first grandchild, so although I was hesitant, I invited her to be present during the birth. Oh what a mistake that was.

She made the entire day about her.

I called her when they induced me. She was a 15 minute ride from the hospital.

For starters, she arrived at the hospital wailing and escorted by security. She parked in the wrong parking lot and had a breakdown on her walk to the hospital. She was 30 mins behind schedule, and was crying because she was “missing the birth” although I told her induction could take several hours and I was only 2cm dilated at time of induction.

She was upset when she arrived because I didn’t make a big deal out of her crying, I knew she wanted ME to mother HER, as always, but I was in fucking labor. So I honestly ignored it.

For every single pregnancy symptoms I’ve had, she’s had it worse. From nausea to feeling tired, to backache. The entire 9 months she is in worse pain than me. So while I was labor, and the pain got pretty strong, SHE was also having terrible back pain.

My husband stepped away to get food, since my mom was too flustered to leave the room and possibly get lost again, she laid down on my bed and closed her eyes while I was struggling with pain, bouncing on the birthing ball.

Once I told her that someone else should come in the room to help me since she was in pain (we had 4 family members in the waiting area), she asked me if I needed help, I said “YES” and she got up with a distressed face and half-ass helped me with comfort measures. While complaining that she was also hurting so much, but she refused to let anyone else come in. I was in too much pain to reach for my phone, so I just waited until my hubby returned.

Thankfully he arrived as the pain got worse and took over like a champ.

She eventually returned to the room from her lunch break, I had asked her to please eat outside since I was fasting, but she needed to eat in the room because fuck me, I had to tell her to stop and go outside twice. She acted like no one had mentioned eating outside before (even the nurses mentioned it).

During labor she completely ignored me, didn’t check on me once, didn’t ask how it was feeling, never came to my bedside. She stayed in the corner taking photos (I asked her to take 2-3 and she took over 150).

As I was hemorrhaging after birth for about an hour, I asked her to give me some fruit, I hadn’t had anything to eat in a day. She started eating the fruit, then tried to feed it to my husband, and then when he said the fruit was for me, she laughed and said “oh I forgot all about her” and finally gave me the fruit, all while looking like I was a burden.

Once we got the recovery room, we needed pillows, she set up my husband with two pillows, and asked he if wanted a third. When I asked her if I could have a pillow, she again said “I forgot about you”, at that point I said “why do you always have to treat me like this”, and she just ignored me and went to get more pillows.

Those are just a few things I can remember. Once she left the recovery room I broke down crying to my awesome husband. She truly made me feel like I didn’t matter the entire time.

Very typical, she likes to act like she is a devoted mother, but behind closed doors she is emotionally abusive.

She stayed with us for a week, she did help cleaning and cooking, but she also undermined and criticized everything I did. I stood up for myself and told her to stop every single time, but she just said “I’m just used to it.” Used to what? Putting me down?

I’m just so hurt and I wish I could keep my distance from her for a while, but if we don’t talk on the phone everyday she has a breakdown, and she isn’t stable. She has threaten suicide since I was a child, that shit stays with you, so I try to keep the peace.

But today, I just don’t know how to deal with all this pain and disappointment.

Thanks to all those who read this damn memoir.

I’m 31 weeks maybe a little more. Anyway, my boss tried to frame something I said in jest to a co worker in private as I was planning on abandoning my job. He said I should take maternity leave early. This is among the many other disrespectful things and comments he’s made towards me since he learned I was pregnant. He tried to tell me I wasn’t doing my job because all I was doing was my nursing duties and never did anything in the floor. I tried to explain I couldn’t lift people that it wasn’t safe for me. He said they have been more than accommodating. It is so untrue and I’m so hurt and angry and feel like a failure because I left for my own sanity. I was planning on working until 36 weeks at least. I’m so sad and depressed now. I cry everyday. I feel like a burden on my fiancé. He says I’m not and he works so hard but I still feel awful. I feel like I’ve been doing my best to keep my head above water and I just can’t anymore. I have no support except my finances but he works so much and is always gone.

Anyway. Sorry for the rant.

to start out i’m 22, my husband will be 23 in this month. we live on our own and have been married for over a year. we have our own vehicles and we both have jobs. we don’t have alot of money as we’re still in our studies but we do alright. we recently found out i was pregnant. i have told a total of 6 people and no one seems happy for me. i’m quite upset by this because everyone was jumping for joy when my cousin and my sister got pregnant. maybe they don’t want another baby in the family soon but it’s bothering me. neither my sister or my cousin was married and was still living at home when they were pregnant and gave birth. they were 20 when they found out, and both were unemployed. my cousin was in college but dropped out immediately. my sister didn’t have her license and still hasn’t gotten it. i’m not saying they did it the “wrong” way. i just feel like i’m more “ready” for a baby than they were. so i don’t understand why my family and friends seem so shocked. i’m feeling very low. if i could get some advice and congratulations that would be nice :’).