r/ENFP

Half a year ago, I (infp) and an Enfp mutually decided to take a break. We were extremely close and loved each other but unfortunately something happened that we needed a break but had planned to reconnect without a definitive time.

We had no contact at all within this period. I reached out 6 days ago. And Enfp agreed to reconnect (enthusiastically) with 2 lines but Enfp was busy at the time to reply anything more than that.

I am anxiously waiting for a sign to catch up and reconnect. I have missed my friend and thought about my friend almost every day.

I doubt it’s the same for Enfp as it’s a very busy person with many friends. I am starting to think Enfp forgot that I had even texted. Or just not interested anymore? Could this be the case? I am very confused.

I'm a 30F INFJ, and as I'm getting older, I feel like I'm starting to see the benefit of Fi more and more. From my simple understanding, it's: putting myself and my values above everything else, and because I'm very in tune with what I want and don't want, I do unto others how I want it done unto me? And also, you guys have this very.. brooding feeling face. I can tell that you guys are feeling something deeply. Unlike myself. I definitely would consider myself to be a deeper thinker than a feeler. (despite being an INFJ)

I remember thinking that ISFPs, INFPs and ENFPs harbored a very egocentric side to them. I used to think you Fi users were just pure outright "SELFISH" (but I love these mbti types btw). I couldn't understand how Fi users could just go with their choices that completely left out the feelings of other people. My choices always used to be based on how they would affect others.

But now I'm starting to realise that at the end of the day, the emotions of others' aren't really my business, and that I'm not the savior of people. It's not my life purpose to make everyone happy, and I have my own feelings and desires too. I've only recently started to be more in touch with my own genuine feelings, and I feel very grounded.

I honestly hope my future partner is an ENFP, but I'm kinda scared that I might misunderstand their Fi (especially this function above other functions) and this might result in some kind of conflict. My dad's an INTJ and his Fi function is always something I never quite understood all that well. It made me misunderstand him A LOT.

So.... Did I get Fi right? Is there anything you guys would like to add?

I also really overthink and struggle with it and also need space and quiet time…is that a thing for just me or most of my kinfolk….also does everyone ask a lot of questions…about everything…to everyone or? Don’t mind me I’ve just begun my talking online life…forgive the jumble 💙 I might have selected the wrong flair…this could have been “random” or “discussion”…can change it cause don’t need support here but it is a question I’m curious about

Hey all, I’ve been chatting with an INFJ who, from where I’m standing, has been pursuing me. Consistent texting for months, sharing history etc. on our last call he asked me about kids and marriage. When I brought it up, however, he said he just wants friendship. I feel confused and super hurt! It really seemed like he wanted more, he was even joking about coming to see me and mentioned places near him he wanted to take me. Now I don’t even know if I want to stay friends tbh.

I feel weird about posting this. I don't usually speak this vulnerably and candidly but I'm kind of desperate. I've been going through a lot recently and I need some ENFP energy in my life.

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Background that you can skip if you don't want to read it: My husband recently abandoned me with our 1 year old. I've tried like an idiot to get him back but of course he doesn't want that. Ever since our son was born (not his fault at all), I keep hitting rock bottom, climbing back up, walking off a differently cliff, and hitting rock bottom again even harder. Now more than ever, I'm realizing that I'm surrounded by people (mostly S's) who have nothing but judgment to give.

I've sought therapy but my therapist lectured me for more than 20 minutes about how I'm living immorally by being vegan because God gave us animals so I'm being rude by not eating his "gift." And that was his own tangent. I didn't ask about my diet and it's not up for negotiation. I'm also not Christian so I don't care what the Bible says about it. Seriously, every single time I start feeling hope or reaching out, someone just punches me back down.

I've been fantasizing about running away and living in the woods with my son, but there's no tofu in the woods. I stayed in a tiny home with him for a few days recently and it was glorious. We picnicked in the sunshine every day. Just perfection.

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I keep thinking about the ENFPs I've known in my life and how good their energy felt, but I haven't connected with one as an adult for some reason. So I have a few questions: I'm 36F, so if you're 30 or older in particular, can you tell me how to find you in the wild? I go out and about pretty much every day and I meet a lot of people but I never seem to find you. Or could you tell me something you would tell a friend going through a rough time? I could use it! Also, I'm feeling completely unloveable today so for the ego boost, could you tell me what you love about INFJs?

A recent post about male ENFP’s compelled me to make this post.

I think that all NF types are on this planet to help heal it. Each in our own specific ways.

As ENFP’s, I believe it is on us to be the ones to bring human connection back to the forefront. The ability to connect with literally almost anybody, and the capacity to hold conflicting views simultaneously makes us the key to bridging the gap.

When we are living in love, when our life is going well, our capacity to spread that love increases tenfold. It’s why we’re here.

It’s the reason so many of us find it difficult to stay static in my opinion. Because we’re not only supposed to stay in one situation and build that one out. We are supposed to continuously motivate and spread love that’s why we’re known as the campaigners. We are the literal cheerleaders of the world. what I’ve noticed that’s crazy, as I had to build something long lasting (family) in order to really see that I can do it and it can be beautiful, but also to give myself permission to not stay in other situations when my time is up. ENFP’s aren’t meant to be tied down where more like boats who need an anchor we must be able to move around and do what we have to do but if we don’t have that anchor, life will surely be more chaotic.

ENFP men specifically, I feel the reason we are so rare is not because we don’t exist, but society has turned us into something else. And I think that’s on purpose because if they saw strong men who are simultaneously empathetic and loving who don’t think violence is the answer to anything… who saw the value in women as equals in all aspects of building together… they would lose their collective minds, and that’s why they try so hard to push this alpha bro manosphere garbage on our young boys and men.

Honestly, all of the Myers-Briggs types when fully healthy have their special way that they’re supposed to contribute to the whole.

All right, that’s pretty much it. Keep shining that light ENFPs the world needs it now more than ever

I’m asking this in every MBTI’s subreddit because I’m curious. Personally as an INFJ I love ENFPs, my dearest friend I’ve ever had was an ENFP so I really appreciate you guys, I’ve never met an ENFP I didn’t like. So I’m curious to know how your relationships with INFJs tend to be?

So I’m pretty sure I’m an ENFP but I do have some doubt and questioning towards other types. I want to hear yalls most random “if you’re an ENFP you would definitely relate to this” takes. The more specific the better :)

i find this to be like so common its actually crazy

i could talk to new people and i feel like at first i'm holding back my personality, don't say much, and then i'm like... ight, i think i can let out a small bit of it

then i hear it "what drugs did u take" "are u drunk?" xd and sometimes I DON'T EVEN THINK THEY RE JOKING??????????

sometimes it might make me hold back, overthink a bit, feel the need to stay low, but sometimes i don't really care and i'm like it is what is it xd

but i'm seeing a pattern, it happens quite often, so i'm wondering if it could be related to my personality type and if other enfps experience this?

i find it that a lot of times, i'm open to having literally discussions about everything and anything even ab things people might find odd/weird/TMI to mention, but for me it's just like not like that really

i'm very open to talking about anything, i might hsesitate to open conversations ab stuff like that at first but once i see the other person taking initiative it feels safe to do so

it's just that i find quite everything to be normal, human like, it could be issues or habits we have as people, that might feel odd to be talked about by some people, but in my head im wondering why is it considered a taboo subject, now obv theres some exceptions and limits, what the other person feels comfortable with and same for me

i'm fine w people telling me the most random, deep, out of pocket stuff, and i kinda like it when i can feel comfortable to do so as well

do u guys feel the same?

I'm not an ENFP but I'd love to hear what the general opinion is here.

So I have a couple of questions;

1. How fast does it typically take you guys to notice you've been ghosted?
2. Do you even notice it at all, especially when it's coming from naturally quiet people?
3. How do you respond to it?

What kind of philosophy do u feel like u lean towards to the most? I feel like i'm mostly leaning towards stoicism and maybe absurdism.

I kinda like the idea that everything and anything is possible if we put our mind to it, to not let things outside our control take over us and do whatever we can, and just do the things we want to do.

Life has no meaning, but that's fine, for me, it feels like that just gives it more freedom, although sometimes it might make u question it its even worth doing stuff (which leans into nihilism kind of), but at the same time it's like "i can do what i want then, no?"

So yeah i'm kind of all over the place with it, but i enjoy stoicism and the way it can change ur mindset around stuff.

So, whats ur philosophy?

But I feel maybe others may disagree, or maybe I understood something wrong. I thought I was Ti-Fe like yk, but I rlly think I have Fi, because I just value things just because I like them, like I scroll Pinterest and just save as many pins as I can that I think look rlly nice, or aesthetic to me.

I have strong likes and dislikes for bad smells, tastes, looks, colors, animals, etc. I think I come off as quite expressive, idk if I’m nice, I can be, I can also be devils advocate, easily, like ENTP can, I can debate like ENTP, easily, but like, I also think I have Fi, I of spend a lot of time thinking about, “the real me” underneath my physical body, my true essence, and how I rlly am personality and looks, wise and trying to be that irl, but it’s too impossible because even best surgeries in the world can’t change me that much, or precisely.

I also like to multitask when doing something, like if I get bored of one task, I can work on the other, etc, and I can handle thinking a lot of things at once. Also I thought I had Fe, but I think I realise what others are feeling after putting myself in their shoes, or simulating myself in their body, yk? And then I feel too guilty, even if I’m right or being abused, but I try to not think about that.

I’m like pretty smart, but I act goofy and silly, and rambling, because that’s more fun, and funny, to me.

Ima sleep described as getting quite moody, which I don’t think ENTP could be like, as much as I get. Like the Fi-ness I could call it.

I do think I’m Ne over Se because I’m in my head a lot, and I ramble when talking and just making connections in real time when talking or yapping for so long.

I like to make friends but not too deep ones, like have fun with people, mostly online bc irl I’m kinda a little scared. Or well don’t go outside very often.

I can be more pessimistic though, idk, I appear very silly.

Also idk if I have dom Ne? Like idk, most of my posts look like I do.

I’m ALs not very private person, I open up rlly fast, and sometimes open up a little too much, and don’t realise it.

I hate school, and rules, uniform, and I’m reallly inconsistent, and hate repetition especially for a long time, I get scared I’ll fail or drop the routine.

I am also very minimalist, I don’t like too much clutter, or things, like around me irl, and I am a little OCD too, about other people’s dna touching me, or germs kinda, but idk.

Do you think I am still ENFP? Or something different?

First off idk if I’m ENTP or INTP or ISTP or ESTP or ENTP or INFP, yet but I think I am, thus, the sub, but I, like see when you look at cognitive functions, etc, and whatnot… idk which one I am, like I can’t self tell which ones I use and don’t, idk which part of me is even real and what’s imagination.

I change personalities everyday, whatever I want, and get lost in the act 💔, idk man, idk, I don’t know who I rlly am, maybe that’s why I hold onto mbti to say what I am, but more importantly, I think I NEED… OTHERS to tell me what I am, like I can’t tell myself I am self blind, that’s why I’m posting to ask others so much, and sharing random self info so y’all can tell somehow…like oh my… I change who I wanna be everyday, so I become so biased to certain types too, but I make up lies, or arguments, I can see myself from so many angles, I don’t know which ones is the real one, it’s kinda why I can think of myself as every type, or gone thru every type.

What do I do guys?

It’s also kinda typology help, but, on the outside, I am very silly and annoying especially when I talk, or start talking, otherwise I’m like autistic leve quiet, people think I don’t know how to talk, and overthink social interaction, because I’m thinking of all ways I can respond, but the it’s too late and they think I’m a loser or something and I lose aura, (ok I know I sound immature I promise I’m not a kid 😭 I’m 19 ok?!) but yk? But I find it funny to tell others, but I also spend so much time in my room, mostly because I have all the fun in my phone, if you took my phone away, I’ll probably be outside, or annoying my siblings, but like here I can talk to to so many people’s,

Do y’all think I’m mistyped????? Idk I can’t tell I can be anything and anyone, maybe I’m lying even now?

I fake Personas so much, but I find it super hilarious to, like I pretended to be a boy for like so long, and flirting with girls, heheh hehe but anyways rlly appreciate the helpsss

Hello guys, ENFP here

How are you guys handling your relationship with the INTP?...

I have an INTP girlfriend but sometimes I feel like I can't understand her properly and end up making her sad or feel overwhelmed, but at the end of the day I know how to make her feel better but I don't want her to feel like that, I want to make her happy all the time by understanding her more and know how to do the right thing before she say it to my.

Any advice you can give me? I will be so thankful because my girlfriend means the world to me and I don't want to make her sad even a little bit 🫂

Hey so I need help with how to navigate this situation. I am obsessed and tortured by the breadcrumbs this ISTP Leo is giving me but can't seem to detach. Please excuse this long post but I would prefer to give all the context.

I work parttime for an events company bartending and I have a crush on my occasional coworker. So we met about a year ago. I was in a serious relationship and didn't really notice him at first. Its an intermittent job so we have worked together maybe five times total. He's very charming and the life of the party at work but I could tell he was an introvert, and uses drugs/alcohol to be on. The second time we worked together I got the sense that he noticed me, he texted me after as well and asked for my instagram and added me. The third time we all got really drunk/stoned working at this very long event. He asked to go for a walk with me later in the evening and gave me a lingering hug. Then after our walk he kept saying (drunkenly) things like "I'm in love" to the group and being really obvious/silly about it. I ignored it and didn't quite get all the language/cultural nuance because I am a Canadian in a Mexican environment. He basically tackled me when I said goodbye. I was still in the relationship so tried to brush it off. I was secretly turned on, and this was when I started to develop an attraction for him because we have real chemistry. The next few times we worked together I kept my distance because of the relationship. He did make me a perfect joint out of an orange skin which I thought was cute and unusual.

Fast-forward to: I broke it off with my 11 year boyfriend who was abusive emotionally, verbally and sometimes physically. (It's been two months now since I succeeded in leaving him). About a week after I left my ex, I wasn't thinking about this bartender guy at all. Impulsively though, at the end of the night I was out with a friend, wanted weed, and thought of him so I texted. He told me to come to his friends bar, which I did, but I left quickly because it was a little sketchy and I was drunk. When I got back to the hostel where I was staying I texted "I'm stoned and horny now" and then fell asleep. I woke up to a million messages and a dick pic. I thought it was cringe but when I opened the messages and read them I was attracted. I really like the way he texts and speaks... and the whole package. I responded with an Omg and he pivoted to asking how I was etc.

Anyway.. I'll try to speed this up. I invited him over later in the week... he was working late he said he'd come over the next day but then ended up being too hungover but we texted and talked on the phone all day. I got really addicted then because we spoke on the phone for hours and he was a great listener and very cute. He never explicitly told me he wasn't coming over, but kind of kept me on the hook all day. I should add that he is a big partier and does drugs and drinks a lot so he is very crazy and inconsistent with everyone, as far as I know. I thought he would work for a casual thing, because of the sexual chemistry, but he proved inconsistent the following weekend as well. He asked me to hang out Friday, but I had plans, then we said we'd see each other the next day. He didn't text until Sunday and told me that he had had to work. Finally the following week he came over late at night after work and we slept together. It was so good and he texted me a bunch after saying how great it was and he wants to see me again, but I went away for a few weeks. He consistently messaged and communicated online during that time. He asked me if I was back, but didn't make plans. So midweek when I was back, I asked him if he wanted to hang out Friday and it was a, maybe I have to work type thing. He then pivoted to asking me more questions about how I was doing/what I'm up to. He didn't text until Sunday and said he had to work with a crying face, no apology. I didn't respond. At that point I thought it should be over. I was sick of it. That was last weekend.

But he consistently likes and comments on my stories, and this Friday he texted me just wanting to make conversation, asking questions about me, but telling me he had to work all weekend. His tone since I've been back has been less flirty and more interested in my life. I think he was always in part interested because I am artist and I have a lot of things going on (exhibition, book being published), which I have read an ISTP values. But he does not seem bothered or urgent about seeing me. I think most logical people would interpret his behavior like he is just trying to keep me around in case he feels like seeing me, but maybe there is a nicer, ISTP explanation? He is definitely an avoidant-dismissive. He has said he doesn't do relationships, for what? because everyone just thinks about themselves.

What I want out of it is not a relationship but a friendship/casual sex thing. I am not needy and after being in a controlling dynamic, his independence attracts me a lot. But I do require a little more consistency, and to see someone who I can be sure actually likes me.

I am thinking though, I should let it go totally because his intermittent attention has really got me hooked. I can't stop thinking about him, it's a compulsion. Help! Can someone please explain his behavior? Why does he want to text me all the time, but doesn't make plans? Does he like me, does it matter? What should I do?

Hii ENFPs!!

I just met this enfp guy and he was the sweetest guy and soo in tune with the surroundings and taking care of me(enfj) and his other friends as well.

Y'all are the sweetest people ever!!

Just got a random thought so I wanted to ask you guys the question mentioned in the title!