u/Hunters_ofArtemis

Is it always like this?

I’m a newly licensed funeral director at a small town funeral home owned by a larger corporation. I started here after I finished mortuary school and have only ever worked at this funeral home.

My boss is verbally and emotionally abusive, takes no accountability for his mistakes but will berate me and my coworkers for any of our errors, gatekeeps important information, cherry picks cases, and hijacks cases after I have been the director to make arrangements with the family. He expects me to work 60+ hours a week and 7 days a week and denies lunch breaks because “he does too so it’s fair”. My entire apprenticeship under him I hardly ever received any teaching or training on how to be a funeral director. I would be either denied the opportunity to step into a director role or (usually after I’d made repeated requests be able to learn) I would be thrown into situations with no guidance and then berated for making mistakes.

He and the entire team basically check every bigotry box possible. They are racist, sexiest, homophobic, transphobic, xenophobic, ableist, and religiously intolerant to any non-Christian ideology. Discriminatory comments are made openly and regularly in the office about families and members of the community.

I have brought up some of these issues to his boss. When I described the work expectations her response was “well you know we have a business to run and (my boss) works that much too so it’s fair. And you know, we have a business to run”. Before I could even get to the way he treats me and the other team members she said “he’s (my boss) is such a great guy, you’re lucky to learn from him. You have it so good here”

My question: Is this normal in funeral service? If upper management is telling me how good I have it, is this just the reality of what it’s like to work in the industry?

Everything I’ve experienced has made me question if this is the right career path for me. I was so excited to go into funeral service but now it’s taken a dramatic toll on my mental and physical health, ruining my relationships, and burning me out before I’ve even really started.

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u/Hunters_ofArtemis — 11 hours ago
▲ 4 r/dating

I feel so alone

I’m a woman in my twenties and while I do have a boyfriend I feel like he’s been growing more and more distant.

Things started out great, there was a mutual interest in sharing knowledge and in emotional connection. We would talk for hours about a variety of intellectual, spiritual, and emotional topics.

As the relationship progressed, we connected more physically and intimately as well. We started becoming more connected in each other’s lives and would perform acts of service to show affection to each other.

Lately I feel like he’s been pulling back and sharing less. When I ask leading questions I get one word answers that shut down any further conversation. I ask what’s going on or how he’s feeling and I get a basic answer. Acts of service don’t happen organically anymore. Physical touch has also decreased, I will put my arm around him or kiss him on the cheek and he doesn’t reciprocate or react.

I’m having a major medical procedure soon with an extended recovery period afterwards and limited mobility. He has hardly said a word about it even though he knows what I will be going through. Last time I saw him I was trying to feel out if he would be visiting me at all and I basically got an answer of “maybe”

He’s talked about wanting me in his life for a long time and how much he values the relationship but I can’t help but feel like he doesn’t care anymore. I don’t know what shifted, maybe it all got too real and he got scared. I just know I had hoped I’d found a partner that supported me and I would in turn support, but I just feel shut out and alone.

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u/Hunters_ofArtemis — 1 day ago

Dumb question and I am fairly certain I know the answer but……

Would any licensed medical professional recommend having a beer or a glass of wine while pregnant to prevent you from going into early labor because it relaxes things or giving kids a little brandy to settle them down.

The aforementioned “medical advice” was allegedly told to my coworker who has two children under 2 by a doctor. I could not imagine any doctor recommending any pregnant woman to drink nor to give a child alcohol.

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u/Hunters_ofArtemis — 2 days ago

Been eating this like every other day for a few weeks now! I love customizing every bite by assembling the different elements on my spoon.

u/Hunters_ofArtemis — 7 days ago

I have an idea for a play and some loose concepts for scenes and characters but no idea how to string it all together. I have some acting/stage management experience so I know theater and I have some writing experience but I’ve never tried to put the two together. Never done a playwriting class or course either. I just have an idea I want to get out of my head and I don’t know how to even start or what are some key aspects of pacing/theatrical storytelling that I should incorporate.

I’m probably overthinking this but I just need a little guidance on how to get going!

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u/Hunters_ofArtemis — 9 days ago
▲ 2 r/Hair

I have had pretty much the same haircut for a while now and I am absolutely bored out of my mind. My hair is mostly straight with a little waviness. I have tried adding a little layering but it always looks kinda flat. My life doesn’t really facilitate me styling or curing my hair every morning and I need to be able to put it in a ponytail and keep it out of my face.

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u/Hunters_ofArtemis — 9 days ago

So the dad of the guy I’m dating is a taxidermist and while I haven’t really know the guy that long I would like to get him something fun for his birthday! I was seeing some other people suggest interesting eyes but I wasn’t sure what sizes to get. What is a typical size eye for a small mammal (probably like anywhere from squirrel to cat)? I figured I could get him some unique options for him to get creative with. Or if anyone has any better suggestions for gifts please let me know!

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u/Hunters_ofArtemis — 11 days ago

I am a newly licensed funeral director currently in a very rural area. I will be moving to a major metropolitan area soon. I used to dye my hair all the colors of the rainbow before I entered funeral service and honestly I miss it.

I have known embalmers with vibrant hair, many piercings, and visible tattoos. All of which would be completely unacceptable at my current job. So I’m curious if inner city funeral directors are more accepted with vibrant hair.

I’m thinking of doing a hot pink peekaboo if anyone is curious 😁.

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u/Hunters_ofArtemis — 14 days ago