u/GrapefruitContent843

I’m 18M and I’m not really sure how to explain this properly, but I’ll try.

I grew up in a pretty conservative environment where even being friends with girls wasn’t really normal, even though my school was co-ed. So I basically didn’t learn how to interact with them in a natural way growing up.

Then I moved to a completely different country and everything changed at once.

I remember on my first day at a new school, I saw a girl in my class and thought she was really pretty. I was still overwhelmed by everything — new country, new school, everything felt unreal honestly. During break she actually came up and asked my name a few times because I didn’t respond properly. But my cousin stepped in and told me not to talk to her, so I just didn’t.

After that, I liked her but never really acted on it properly. I was kind of obvious about it, people picked up on it, but I never actually did anything and it just became awkward over time.

Looking back, a lot of my early social experiences were like that. Not just with her, but in general:

• I’ve had moments where I didn’t realize someone was flirting or showing interest and I just acted too casually
• Once someone confessed to me and I panicked and shut it down, and we just stopped talking after that
• A few times I was directly asked if I was single but I just froze or avoided answering properly
• I’ve had situations where I didn’t follow through or act when I probably should have just responded normally

There was also one really bad situation in school where misunderstandings escalated and screenshots/messages got spread around. It turned into a lot of drama and people believed things that weren’t true. That period honestly affected how I saw people and made me more reserved for a while.

Over time, I started going to the gym, got more confident physically, and I actually started socializing more. I talk to people way more normally now than I used to, and I don’t feel as “locked up” socially anymore.

But I still notice that in certain situations I hesitate or overthink instead of just reacting normally. It’s not as bad as before, but it’s still there.

I think the weird part is that from the outside I probably didn’t look socially “lost” or anything. At times people assumed I was confident or even fine socially. Most people thought I was attractive, fit, and extroverted, but I used to be shocked hearing that. I think I just had bad judgment in social situations growing up, and nobody really prepared me for any of this.

Now school is over and I’m about to start uni, and I feel like I’ve improved a lot, but I still don’t fully trust myself socially in certain moments.

Not really sure what I’m asking for, just wanted to hear from people who’ve gone through something similar and actually fixed it.

I’m 18M and I’m not really sure how to explain this properly, but I’ll try.

I grew up in a pretty conservative environment where even being friends with girls wasn’t really normal, even though my school was co-ed. So I basically didn’t learn how to interact with them in a natural way growing up.

Then I moved to a completely different country and everything changed at once.

I remember on my first day at a new school, I saw a girl in my class and thought she was really pretty. I was still overwhelmed by everything — new country, new school, everything felt unreal honestly. During break she actually came up and asked my name a few times because I didn’t respond properly. But my cousin stepped in and told me not to talk to her, so I just didn’t.

After that, I liked her but never really acted on it properly. I was kind of obvious about it, people picked up on it, but I never actually did anything and it just became awkward over time.

Looking back, a lot of my early social experiences were like that. Not just with her, but in general:

• I’ve had moments where I didn’t realize someone was flirting or showing interest and I just acted too casually
• Once someone confessed to me and I panicked and shut it down, and we just stopped talking after that
• A few times I was directly asked if I was single but I just froze or avoided answering properly
• I’ve had situations where I didn’t follow through or act when I probably should have just responded normally

There was also one really bad situation in school where misunderstandings escalated and screenshots/messages got spread around. It turned into a lot of drama and people believed things that weren’t true. That period honestly affected how I saw people and made me more reserved for a while.

Over time, I started going to the gym, got more confident physically, and I actually started socializing more. I talk to people way more normally now than I used to, and I don’t feel as “locked up” socially anymore.

But I still notice that in certain situations I hesitate or overthink instead of just reacting normally. It’s not as bad as before, but it’s still there.

I think the weird part is that from the outside I probably didn’t look socially “lost” or anything. At times people assumed I was confident or even fine socially. Most people thought I was attractive, fit, and extroverted, but I used to be shocked hearing that. I think I just had bad judgment in social situations growing up, and nobody really prepared me for any of this.

Now school is over and I’m about to start uni, and I feel like I’ve improved a lot, but I still don’t fully trust myself socially in certain moments.

Not really sure what I’m asking for, just wanted to hear from people who’ve gone through something similar and actually fixed it.

I’m 18M and I’m not really sure how to explain this properly, but I’ll try.

I grew up in a pretty conservative environment where even being friends with girls wasn’t really normal, even though my school was co-ed. So I basically didn’t learn how to interact with them in a natural way growing up.

Then I moved to a completely different country and everything changed at once.

I remember on my first day at a new school, I saw a girl in my class and thought she was really pretty. I was still overwhelmed by everything — new country, new school, everything felt unreal honestly. During break she actually came up and asked my name a few times because I didn’t respond properly. But my cousin stepped in and told me not to talk to her, so I just didn’t.

After that, I liked her but never really acted on it properly. I was kind of obvious about it, people picked up on it, but I never actually did anything and it just became awkward over time.

Looking back, a lot of my early social experiences were like that. Not just with her, but in general:

• I’ve had moments where I didn’t realize someone was flirting or showing interest and I just acted too casually
• Once someone confessed to me and I panicked and shut it down, and we just stopped talking after that
• A few times I was directly asked if I was single but I just froze or avoided answering properly
• I’ve had situations where I didn’t follow through or act when I probably should have just responded normally

There was also one really bad situation in school where misunderstandings escalated and screenshots/messages got spread around. It turned into a lot of drama and people believed things that weren’t true. That period honestly affected how I saw people and made me more reserved for a while.

Over time, I started going to the gym, got more confident physically, and I actually started socializing more. I talk to people way more normally now than I used to, and I don’t feel as “locked up” socially anymore.

But I still notice that in certain situations I hesitate or overthink instead of just reacting normally. It’s not as bad as before, but it’s still there.

I think the weird part is that from the outside I probably didn’t look socially “lost” or anything. At times people assumed I was confident or even fine socially. Most people thought I was attractive, fit, and extroverted, but I used to be shocked hearing that. I think I just had bad judgment in social situations growing up, and nobody really prepared me for any of this.

Now school is over and I’m about to start uni, and I feel like I’ve improved a lot, but I still don’t fully trust myself socially in certain moments.

Not really sure what I’m asking for, just wanted to hear from people who’ve gone through something similar and actually fixed it.

I’m 18M and I’m not really sure how to explain this properly, but I’ll try.

I grew up in a pretty conservative environment where even being friends with girls wasn’t really normal, even though my school was co-ed. So I basically didn’t learn how to interact with them in a natural way growing up.

Then I moved to a completely different country and everything changed at once.

I remember on my first day at a new school, I saw a girl in my class and thought she was really pretty. I was still overwhelmed by everything — new country, new school, everything felt unreal honestly. During break she actually came up and asked my name a few times because I didn’t respond properly. But my cousin stepped in and told me not to talk to her, so I just didn’t.

After that, I liked her but never really acted on it properly. I was kind of obvious about it, people picked up on it, but I never actually did anything and it just became awkward over time.

Looking back, a lot of my early social experiences were like that. Not just with her, but in general:

• I’ve had moments where I didn’t realize someone was flirting or showing interest and I just acted too casually
• Once someone confessed to me and I panicked and shut it down, and we just stopped talking after that
• A few times I was directly asked if I was single but I just froze or avoided answering properly
• I’ve had situations where I didn’t follow through or act when I probably should have just responded normally

There was also one really bad situation in school where misunderstandings escalated and screenshots/messages got spread around. It turned into a lot of drama and people believed things that weren’t true. That period honestly affected how I saw people and made me more reserved for a while.

Over time, I started going to the gym, got more confident physically, and I actually started socializing more. I talk to people way more normally now than I used to, and I don’t feel as “locked up” socially anymore.

But I still notice that in certain situations I hesitate or overthink instead of just reacting normally. It’s not as bad as before, but it’s still there.

I think the weird part is that from the outside I probably didn’t look socially “lost” or anything. At times people assumed I was confident or even fine socially. Most people thought I was attractive, fit, and extroverted, but I used to be shocked hearing that. I think I just had bad judgment in social situations growing up, and nobody really prepared me for any of this.

Now school is over and I’m about to start uni, and I feel like I’ve improved a lot, but I still don’t fully trust myself socially in certain moments.

Not really sure what I’m asking for, just wanted to hear from people who’ve gone through something similar and actually fixed it.

I might be wrong, but from what I’ve seen in KL, the whole “be loud, confident, dominant” advice doesn’t always match reality.

Online, the ideal is always described the same — tall (180+), very outgoing, expressive, socially dominant, etc.

But in real life here, I’ve noticed something different.

Guys who are:

• around mid-to-taller range (like 175–180ish, not necessarily super tall)
• in decent shape (lean/athletic, not overly bulky)
• well-groomed and put together
• and more calm/low-key rather than loud

still seem to get plenty of attention without doing much.

In some cases, it almost feels like being too loud or trying too hard is actually less attractive than just being composed and consistent.

So I’m curious — especially from women in KL:

Is the “ideal guy” here actually different from the Western idea?

Do you notice:

• quiet confidence > loud confidence?
• lean/athletic > big/muscular?
• being put-together > trying to stand out?

I might be wrong, but from what I’ve seen in KL, the whole “be loud, confident, dominant” advice doesn’t always match reality.

Online, the ideal is always described the same — tall (180+), very outgoing, expressive, socially dominant, etc.

But in real life here, I’ve noticed something different.

Guys who are:

• around mid-to-taller range (like 175–180ish, not necessarily super tall)
• in decent shape (lean/athletic, not overly bulky)
• well-groomed and put together
• and more calm/low-key rather than loud

still seem to get plenty of attention without doing much.

In some cases, it almost feels like being too loud or trying too hard is actually less attractive than just being composed and consistent.

So I’m curious — especially from women in KL:

Is the “ideal guy” here actually different from the Western idea?

Do you notice:

• quiet confidence > loud confidence?
• lean/athletic > big/muscular?
• being put-together > trying to stand out?

Hey everyone,

I’m a 23F from Pakistan and thought it might be interesting to do a casual Q&A.

If you’re from India and curious about anything — culture, daily life, uni, food, social stuff, or even random stereotypes — feel free to ask. I’ll answer honestly based on my own experience.

Not here to argue or debate politics, just thought it could be a chill way to share perspectives and clear up misconceptions.

Ask away 🙂

Hey everyone,

I’m a 23F from Pakistan and thought it might be interesting to do a casual Q&A.

If you’re from India and curious about anything — culture, daily life, uni, food, social stuff, or even random stereotypes — feel free to ask. I’ll answer honestly based on my own experience.

Not here to argue or debate politics, just thought it could be a chill way to share perspectives and clear up misconceptions.

Ask away 🙂

Not really sure how to word this, but I’ve been a bit concerned about my younger brother recently.

He’s 18, around 180 cm, and he’s been going to the gym pretty consistently for over a year. He’s in good shape now, nothing extreme but clearly fit.

Looks-wise he’s honestly fine — nothing he stresses about, just naturally good features and he keeps himself well-groomed.

Personality-wise he’s a bit quiet at first with new people, but when he’s comfortable he’s completely normal and easy to talk to.

The thing is, socially he feels a bit stuck. Most of his close friends are childhood friends, and now they’re all moving into relationships and different circles. He’s had situations where girls showed interest before, but it never really turned into anything serious or consistent.

Lately he’s been a bit more in his head and quieter than usual. Not anything extreme, just noticeable to me.

I don’t know if this is just normal at this age or if he’s just overthinking things socially. From the outside, what usually causes this kind of situation?

Not really sure how to word this, but I’ve been a bit concerned about my younger brother recently.

He’s 18, around 180 cm, and he’s been going to the gym pretty consistently for over a year. He’s in good shape now, nothing extreme but clearly fit.

Looks-wise he’s honestly fine — nothing he stresses about, just naturally good features and he keeps himself well-groomed.

Personality-wise he’s a bit quiet at first with new people, but when he’s comfortable he’s completely normal and easy to talk to.

The thing is, socially he feels a bit stuck. Most of his close friends are childhood friends, and now they’re all moving into relationships and different circles. He’s had situations where girls showed interest before, but it never really turned into anything serious or consistent.

Lately he’s been a bit more in his head and quieter than usual. Not anything extreme, just noticeable to me.

I don’t know if this is just normal at this age or if he’s just overthinking things socially. From the outside, what usually causes this kind of situation?

I’m 18, 179 cm, and I’ve been training consistently in the gym for over a year. I’ve built a pretty solid physique — broad shoulders, narrow waist (good V-taper), decent chest, and defined arms. Overall I’d say I look athletic and take care of myself.

Appearance-wise, I put effort in. I’ve got thick, wavy hair with good volume, strong eyebrows, and fairly sharp/symmetrical features. I keep things clean and put-together, nothing sloppy.

Personality-wise, I’m a bit reserved at first — not awkward or socially clueless, just more on the quiet side when I meet someone new. Once I’m comfortable, I’m normal and can hold conversations fine. I’m not hesitant to start conversations either, I just don’t come off as super outgoing immediately.

My interests are pretty normal: TV shows, gym, outdoor activities, and I’m open to trying new things.

im 18M, living in UAE along with my family. A very close family friend of mine whos a pakistani and he is also my long distant relative whos grandparents went from India to Pakistan during partition have invited my fam for his wedding. Non of my family members are available atp so im going alone. I have luckily got a visa tho i have to go to police station daily but the sponsor is very rich so i wont have much problem doing it. The wedding is in karachi cuz thats where the groom is from and ig he lives in defense colony idk what that is so lmk what u guys think.

I’m 18, 179 cm, and I’ve been training consistently in the gym for over a year. I’ve built a pretty solid physique — broad shoulders, narrow waist (good V-taper), decent chest, and defined arms. Overall I’d say I look athletic and take care of myself.

Appearance-wise, I put effort in. I’ve got thick, wavy hair with good volume, strong eyebrows, and fairly sharp/symmetrical features. I keep things clean and put-together, nothing sloppy.

Personality-wise, I’m a bit reserved at first — not awkward or socially clueless, just more on the quiet side when I meet someone new. Once I’m comfortable, I’m normal and can hold conversations fine. I’m not hesitant to start conversations either, I just don’t come off as super outgoing immediately.

My interests are pretty normal: TV shows, gym, outdoor activities, and I’m open to trying new things.

The thing is… I don’t really get attention from girls, and I’m not sure why. I’m not expecting anything crazy, but it feels like I’m doing most things right and still not getting results.

So I’m asking honestly — from a female perspective (or anyone with insight), where could I be lacking?

Is it:

• Vibe/energy I give off?
• Not being expressive enough early on?
• Something about how I approach or talk?
• Or something else I’m not seeing?

Be real, I’d rather hear the truth than just generic advice.

So I’ve been noticing this for a while in my uni and wanted to ask if anyone else has seen this kind of thing.

My friend is around 179 cm, been going gym for more than a year now so he’s got pretty decent arms and an athletic build. He’s a bit on the shy side at first but once he’s comfortable he talks normally, not awkward or anything definitely not the loudest in the room. He’s got thick eyebrows, wavy thick hair, good shoulder to waist ratio, around 15% bf not much shredded, strong facial features and a caramel skin tone. (THIS IS HOW GEMINI DESCRIBED HIM NOT ME ALSO I DON'T HAVE A CRUSH ON HIM JUST LAB SESSION TOGETHER)

What’s interesting is the amount of attention he gets from girls on campus. It’s not anything obvious or exaggerated, but more like passive attention — like people noticing him when he walks in, longer eye contact than usual, small random conversations turning into flirting sometimes, and some girls kind of teasing/flirting in a light way when talking to him.

He doesn’t really act like he’s trying for it either, just goes about his day normally.

I’m just wondering what people think might be behind it. Is it more about looks and gym, or just how he carries himself? Or maybe it’s just normal and I’m reading too much into it.

So I’ve been noticing this for a while in my uni and wanted to ask if anyone else has seen this kind of thing.

My friend is around 179 cm, been going gym for more than a year now so he’s got pretty decent arms and an athletic build. He’s a bit on the shy side at first but once he’s comfortable he talks normally, not awkward or anything definitely not the loudest in the room. He’s got thick eyebrows, wavy thick hair, good shoulder to waist ratio, around 15% bf not much shredded, strong facial features and a caramel skin tone. (THIS IS HOW GEMINI DESCRIBED HIM NOT ME ALSO I DON'T HAVE A CRUSH ON HIM JUST LAB SESSION TOGETHER)

What’s interesting is the amount of attention he gets from girls on campus. It’s not anything obvious or exaggerated, but more like passive attention — like people noticing him when he walks in, longer eye contact than usual, small random conversations turning into flirting sometimes, and some girls kind of teasing/flirting in a light way when talking to him.

He doesn’t really act like he’s trying for it either, just goes about his day normally.

I’m just wondering what people think might be behind it. Is it more about looks and gym, or just how he carries himself? Or maybe it’s just normal and I’m reading too much into it.

**TL;DR;** : This is a sample summary of the TLDR rule, just copy the text in gray box. Is this going the right way?

So I’ve been noticing this for a while in my private uni in Kuala Lumpur and wanted to ask if anyone else has seen this kind of thing.

My friend is around 179 cm, been going gym for more than a year now so he’s got pretty decent arms and an athletic build. He’s a bit on the shy side at first but once he’s comfortable he talks normally, not awkward or anything. He’s got thick eyebrows, wavy thick hair, good shoulder to waist ratio, strong facial features and a caramel skin tone.

What’s interesting is the amount of attention he gets from girls on campus. It’s not anything obvious or exaggerated, but more like passive attention — like people noticing him when he walks in, longer eye contact than usual, small random conversations turning into flirting sometimes, and some girls kind of teasing/flirting in a light way when talking to him.

He doesn’t really act like he’s trying for it either, just goes about his day normally.

I’m just wondering what people think might be behind it. Is it more about looks and gym, or just how he carries himself? Or maybe it’s just normal and I’m reading too much into it.

Hey everyone, I’m an Indian student living in Kuwait, and I’m looking to move to Malaysia for a BSc in Computer Science (Specializing in AI).

I’ve narrowed my list to Monash, APU, and UM, but I need help deciding. I’m an international student (CBSE board), and I want the "real" perspective on which one actually delivers.

My Stats:

• 10th CBSE: 89.6%
• 12th CBSE: 84% (Predicted)
• IELTS: 7.0 (Overall)

My Priorities:

• Prestige & Status: I’ll be honest—reputation matters to me. I want a degree that I can be proud of and that carries weight when I apply to MNCs or top Master's programs globally.
• The "Big Campus" Feel: I want a lively campus with a diverse crowd. I’m moving countries for this, so the social/networking environment is huge for me.
• Career ROI: In 5 years, I want to be in a high-paying MNC role or starting my own thing. I need a uni that doesn't just teach theory but actually connects me to the industry.
• Learning Style: I’m a fan of flexibility—blended learning (videos/modules) mixed with hands-on work.

My current thoughts:

• Monash: Seems like the "Harvard" of the group in terms of global ranking (#36), which fits my prestige goal. Is the CS/AI program actually better than a tech-focused school?
• APU: I hear they are the kings of tech and employability. Is the "tech-first" vibe worth more than a Top 50 global ranking for my 12th board scores?
• UM: Obviously the top local pick and great for the CV, but I’ve heard mixed things about how modern the tech facilities are for international students compared to private options.

For those of you in these unis or working in tech in MY: which one would you pick if you were in my shoes? Is Monash worth the extra cash for the name, or should I go to APU for the tech focus? Also, with an 84% predicted, do I have a good shot at scholarships?

Thanks in advance!