I just recently made the descion to cut off my bully friends a few weeks ago and my life has been so much better ever since. Does anyone else like having no friends or just has no friends? And when i mean no friends I don't mean nobody but my best friend or I have no real life friends but i have online friends I mean NO friends.
I’ve been trying to figure out if this is anxiety or just how I naturally am.
I can go out, meet people, do normal things etc. But it never feels completely relaxed.
It’s more like I’m always managing it in the background, thinking about how long I’ll stay, when I might leave, or whether I’ve had enough social time.
Even if I’m enjoying something, there’s still this part of me that’s kind of tracking everything and waiting until I can go back to my own space.
And when I do get back, I feel instant relief, like I can finally switch off.
It’s not that I don’t like people or going out, but it always feels like something I have to handle rather than just naturally be in.
Not sure if that makes sense, but does anyone else feel like this?
During Lent, our church had a small dinner every Friday night (meatless soup, bread, mac and cheese) and my husband and I sat at a table with people we didn’t know. This is one of my worst nightmares: making small talk to strangers. But everyone was really nice, friendly and kind. We met new people and we greet each other at church now.
Truth be told, I still liked going back home at the end of the night. I still like my alone time. But to me this was a big deal, breaking out of my comfort zone. I wish I felt more comfortable around people but I’m glad I did it.
I have been talking to a friend of mine and we were talking about how much we panic. She said she starts panicking easily but me, an introvert, on the other hand doesn't panic at all unless it's something that could embarrass me in public (I have a lot of social anxiety). But in an actual emergency situation I am very calm and can handle the situation well.
idk maybe it's because I game a lot. Are you guys like this or is it just me
I am an introvert in a very loose sense of the word, I. believe. I can be very rowdy, very loud, and I love people, but that love needs energy. I get that energy from the copious amounts of alone time I give myself.
I have this friend, who is quite similar to me with the love of people, but not about where they get their energy from. This friend seems to want to be around me 24 / 7. They are at my house every weekend, they try to get on my bus every Friday afternoon, every hangout they try to turn into a sleepover, every activity I mention they ask to come along with me, and every activity they do they invite me as well. I love them to death but the amount of time they want to spend with me is exhausting.
Today (Friday), they were able to get onto my bus yet again and go home with me, asked my father if I was available for a sleepover before asking me if I wanted to have a sleepover, and informed me after acquiring said sleepover that their parent plans to pick them up at ONE PM tomorrow. That is nearly twenty-four hours together, and they have been using this time together to try and plan future hangouts. I cannot do this.
What makes this worse is that this friend seems to have a... fragile view of my opinion of them. Every time I try to distance myself at all, they ask if I'm mad at them, even though I've said many times I just need quiet to replenish my social battery. How do I get this friend to understand that hangouts like this literally do nothing but make me upset and stressed?
does anyone feel like an imposter among everyone who has a social life… it’s not that I don’t have friends at all, I have a few that I hang out with consistently but I don’t have a big friend group
But when coworkers or people I just met ask about what I’m doing over weekends and stuff, I always feel insecure cus I just feel like everyone always has so much going on in their life and has so many friends to meet with all the time. And I’m like… am I normal
And in terms why I don’t have many friends, I moved around a lot so I just never have a solid group.. I genuinely think I am a nice person so it makes me sad that I’ll never have many friends
I know people say to go out and do more hobbies but as this group says I am an introvert so I honestly don’t bother going out of my way to meet people.. I guess kinda contradicting
pls give me a ides idk these days are horrible it was year ago when my ex boyfriend didn't choose me and this days I feel like my own bestfriend she's changed alot and tonight I stalked on her tiktok and I found out that she have new bestfriend even they have tiktok together and 12h ago I meet her because we go together on art school she was the own told me and says to me come to school and now I found out that her bestfriend she's one of students on art school. I feel like no one ever was choose me, I'm introverte I don't have any other friends she was the only friend I have i don't know what to do really
I'm 37 year old male who works as a dentist with a successful practice and own my own house. Despite my occupation, I have always been the shy, reserved, "quiet" type since I was a child. Never really had any close friends throughout my life. I've never been in a real relationship despite being 37. I remember growing up as a child, there were times I got bullied for being quiet and shy, so it only made me more reserved for fear of being ridiculed. This has carried over to my adult years, so I've never really learned to open up to people due to fear of being ridiculed. It's like a defense mechanism from childhood.
Yet in my career as a dentist, I can open up to people because I'm running a business. When I'm talking to patients, I don't struggle much. If it's a difficult patient, I have loyal staff to help me out. The staff help "carry" me in my career. They're loyal and I'm grateful for that. I think business-wise, I can do well with people. But when it comes to social and romantic connections, forget about it! I struggle big time.
I say recently within last few months, I've been having emotional highs and lows quite daily. It's never really been this bad. Despite my material success, I sometimes feel alone in my own house and that I'm missing out when I see everyone else around me having relationships, getting married and having kids. Especially seeing younger cousins. It makes me feel sad. Yet, those temporary feelings go away and then I'm happy to be alone again. It's like a weird contradiction. Because when I go out on dates with women, I often times want to be alone and single again, lol. Yet when I'm alone in my own house, I sometimes wish for connection and companionship. I don't know why it's like this. I also overthink alot and often replay scenarios in my head how different the outcome would've been if I acted differently.
I've had very limited experience with dating and often times the women felt I was too reserved and that there were "awkward silences". So, it often takes me back to my childhood when I got criticized for being too quiet. I completely suck at flirting and often miss cues. :(
Also, within the last year, I've been taking multiple solo international trips where I just travel alone. Like every few months. I love it because of complete freedom and autonomy! Yet at times, I do wish I had someone special I could've shared yet. I've had some people comment that they think it's "odd" that I travel just by myself because it isn't "normal".
Anyone else can relate? I just feel in my position as a 37 year old dentist, I should be married with kids. Society deems it that way, yet I feel like the odd one out. Sometimes I think about ending it because I just don't relate to regular people with friendships and relationships.
I've never seen a counsellor/therapist or been on any meds, but maybe it could help?
I’ve always been a massive introvert, but lately I’ve started to highly suspect that I have Asperger’s syndrome. Ofcourse I prefer my alone time, but also when I do have to socialize, I’ve always felt a mismatch of “frequency” with people. A grinding of mismatched gears if that makes any sense. Anyone else go through the same?
The pain of being introverted in family that legitamtely doesn't want to let conversations end.
Its the worst when you can tell "conversation" has no substance and its just two people saying the most random non sense to fill the void. Its complete hell when they know you are tuning them out mind your business and they say something to you just as excuse to force you to take part.
Just when you think the conversation is about to end and there is 10 seconds of silence they keep bringing up something else to keep the conversation doesnt even resemble the original topic and its so inorganic. And THEN they start repeating the same shit they have been saying for the past half hour as if they literally didnt just cover that.
Sometimes i cant tell who in the family actually has the mental disorders
Hello guys first im sorry my english is not the best but i need advice please also this may be a bit long so i grow up with a strict family when i was younger they were so many rules i couldnt go out alone expect only school if i wanted to go out ( which it become possible until high school) i will need to tell my family the whole plan and with who im going out ( obv should be only girls) and my dad will drive me and pick me up so i was very isolated then i just gave up on going out i hated the fact that i need to tell them everything and they need to drive me it was embarassing then one day at the very last month of high school i had a crazy day one teacher was absent so me and a friend went to pass time at the mall that was very close to high school and we had 1 hour free then my dad saw there he became someone else and started yelling at me infront of everyone in the mall and saying you will not go back to school some members of my family calmed him down so i could continue studying
So that night really affected me and shifted something in me i become very introvered i dont even have friends and if some members of my family visits us i will stay in my room
Now im 25 yo im a teacher i just started teaching and i just got my driving licence and yesterday i had a stressful day at work teaching is hard so i broke down in tears then out of nowhere my dad said to me « why are you like this? You have no personnality no friends you’re always alone and thats why your always sensitive over everything »
I wanted to answer him and tell him thats your fault but i just kept it to myself cuz i know his anger issues and we will start a problem
Now i just want to ask if im overreacting and what can i do to really change myself because this is affecting my whole life i cant even start dating like this
i just cant help myself... i need to vent... im so damn lonely... but it hurts so much...
im 36M from spain... have been alone all my life... no girl ever wants me... i tried so much, i try every day...
im weak, i need affection and i have a bunch of other stuff... and im not wanted cause of that... i need someone to hold me and trust....
i just cant deal with this pain... i write this while in tears...
nobody wants me and im so lonely...
i cant live like this... its just pain every day... its just pain and pain and pain...
nobody wants me...
Has anyone experienced embarrassing moments of their life like you can’t even share it to your closed ones that much embarrassing because I feel like I have had many such incidents and I can’t live peacefully imagining those stuffs
Hi I am new here. Would you interact with me?
just cheer me I touched my limits thats all I can do
Ever notice how you’re always the one texting first, checking in, making plans… and somehow still the easiest to overlook?
It doesn’t happen overnight—it builds slowly, until one day you realize people don’t choose you because they never had to. That quiet realization hits harder than anything.
If this feels a little too familiar, you might want to take a deeper look at why it happens—and how to break the pattern. 👇
About three years ago, I moved to a different city because of my boyfriend. Since then, I’ve often struggled with loneliness and sadness. These feelings usually come once every 2–3 months and last up to a week.
Recently, two new colleagues joined our workplace—about six months ago—and they’ve already managed to make friends here, get close to people, and even go on trips together. Meanwhile, I haven’t been able to find anyone in all that time. I did manage to meet a couple of people and we spent time together for a few months, but I realized that I was the only one putting in effort. Since I stopped reaching out, I haven’t heard from them at all.
As for my colleagues, it took me about a year and a half to somewhat fit in. Now there are a few people I can talk to, but we only interact at work. We don’t text or hang out outside of it.
When it comes to my boyfriend, we don’t have much in common. We spend about 80% of our time doing things separately. The only thing we really do together is travel abroad and watching TV, that’s it.
I do have a friend, but she lives in my hometown, and the only thing she really enjoys is drinking, which doesn’t interest me much anymore. So we just text and meet maybe 3x a year. . A long time ago, I also tried finding a friend online, but those connections usually faded over time.
What should I do? How is it that those girls were able to build connections within just six months of moving here? It’s true that I’m not an extrovert like them. I don’t enjoy typical small talk, but sometimes when I meet someone I really click with iam able to speak endlessly. I thought I can handle this by myself but probably not.
Anyway when I was a kid/teen I didn't have any problem with finding friends. So I have no idea what do I do wrong.
I stepped out of my comfort zone and messaged someone. Now I am obsessed with his answer. He needs to reply even if you want me to f*** off. This will sit with me forever. Sigh. I’m better off. Get over it.
Long story short I’m 21 years old and looking for a job to hopefully help pay for college, but everything around me is just cashier and stocking assistant jobs where I’ll have to talk with customers every day.
I’m not only scared to talk to strangers but horrible at talking to people in general. I can’t fake being good at or happy about it, so I have no idea what to do. I used to work overnight stocking at Walmart but it was too unhealthy for me so I quit a few months ago.
So does anyone have any ideas on what to do?