r/exorthodox

Hello everyone, I've been an active member for quite a while here, and I guess it's time to reveal my secret, I'm an ex EO monk. AMA

Hey everyone, it’s been a while since I left the Orthodox Church but I still can’t stop thinking about some of the things that were said to me by people my age at my former church.

In my case, some “church friends” would “jokingly” call me racial slurs (I’m Middle Eastern) or thank god that I’m a Christian unlike my people who are “stupid mohammedan camel piss drinkers”. The way they talked to me was obviously nothing compared to how they talked about Black people or South asians since there were almost none in my church. For example they would make fun of Black people for having been enslaved or for speaking about racism and discrimination

I’m asking this because it’s one of the main reasons I, and probably others too, ended up leaving Orthodoxy. I’m sure many people of color didn’t feel at home in the church so I wanted to know whether others had similar experiences that made them reconsider or leave Orthodoxy as well.

Feel free to use the comments to support each other because I know how traumatic racism can be. I’d honestly be interested to hear from others who’ve had similar experiences.

I read some of his works years ago (Nihilism and The Religion of the Future) and generally know his story from a pious perspective only. The recent decision to initiate the process of his canonization has been met with contention, with some Orthodox people even expressing their hesitation. I’ve heard bits and pieces, but could still use a comprehensive breakdown of the allegations, preferably weighing the evidence on both sides.

So my sister's boyfriend came over and they started talking about marriage and stuff and he's orthodox too so they obviously started talking about orthodox marriage books and I heard my mom say "you know what's funny to me is that there's no books on orthodox marriage that don't talk about parenting." Haha so funny. But I thought "these are (most likely) young couples who are getting married and they're immediately told to have kids, like, it's their ​business, their choice, why do they HAVE to?

I posted in the Orthodox reddit that I don't think Fr Seraphim Rose should be canonized. Not even because I think he's guilty. But I think the chance that he is guilty for enabling Gleb is enough to not canonize him. You would think this is a normal conclusion to come to but honestly nothing about the responses or the idolization of this man is normal and neither is the way so many Orthodox Christians act in person. I think I will probably just start participating in lenten fasting and confession and service probably just for nativity and Pascha because I dont even want to make friends with most of these people anymore though I still love the faith. They are a bizarre crowd.

And I got Many many upvotes but none appeared because of all the down voting. It's like they do not care that a substantial amount of Orthodox Christians feel the same way I do that respect and justice for the child victims of Gleb comes before even a saint. Even if he is a real saint the children come first and they can privately venerate him but no they want to shove their fanaticism on everyone else. It's very hard to drive me away from the church because I have been very resilient and sticking with it but this really is a breaking point. It's very disappointing.

So basically when some (not all) young men join the OCA or Russian Orthodox Church there seems to be some kind of unspoken hope that they would find a beautiful girl in a veil or headscarf, soft spoken, Russian or something, fair, and devout. The hilarious part is that there seems not to be a single woman who meets their criteria. They hope to see a fair maiden praying quietly and fully devout - but then they end up being band members, granddaughters, or just normal people. It's like chasing a unicorn. Have any of you ever seen this happen?

Edit: The hilarious part is that I am the only "eligible" woman from 20-24 years old in the whole ROCOR Bay Area, and I have a boyfriend. XD

I unfortunately saw this as an orthodox Christian as a teenager. I’m fine now but was diagnosed with major depression with psychotic characteristics, my priest told me it was the devil influencing me and I should even HIDE information from my therapist in case the devil hears it.

I was baptized into orthodoxy at 15 and have left. But the most disastrous thing for me in this church was the bs sexual ethics that ruined my entire teenage years with intense anxiety and depression. Moralizing sex that is consensual or pornography is so harmful and against everything we know in science/psychology. The shaming that you’re a sinner for having basic biological urges that are a necessity as a human being is just so odd to me and I hated myself for years because I understandably couldn’t control my sexual desires. The logic of this church is that you should feel repentant and sorry for a biology God gave you and that is so essential to being a human being your body will force you physically and psychologically to act upon it. I always see young people extremely depressed and anxious about it in the church unable to question it out of fear of sin and I was like this for years, but once I got an outsider perspective looking in after deconstruction it’s just all completely illogical. I have since become Tibetan buddhist and my teacher who is a monk said sex is a good thing and that there’s no shame in it which was a huge relief for me.

I'm going to ask you to think back to when you were Orthodox, if you're willing, and answer honestly whether you enjoyed the Divine Liturgy while you attended. I'm not Orthodox, never have been, and have no plans to convert, but I do occasionally watch services online at one of the (few) Orthodox parishes in my area. I like some aspects of the liturgy, but other parts I find incredibly dull. Was this your experience as well? Did you sometimes find yourself zoning out? I've also found that some of the deacons speak so fast during the litany that it's hard to understand what they're saying. I'd appreciate your thoughts.

I'm generally interested in learning about different spiritual traditions, and eventually, I looked into orthodoxy. It struck me as almost completely miserable and sad. The worldview feels completely gnostic and medieval, almost all the saint quotes just feel like distilled catholic guilt, with a constant call to repent for whatever one does or thinks, and the endless fasting, prayer cycles, infinite bureaucracy and lessons to join the church and get a sacrament that is given to little babies who have no understaning of what's going on. I'm not a Christian myself, but from my understanding the Gospel is supposed to be... good news? This lifestyle doesn't feel much like good news.

So, without going into detail on all my critiques, I'm curious about why you chose to join the church. I wonder if there is an appealing part of the picture I missed out on, or if there is something else about it that made you reach that conclusion.

If you're a cradle, would you say you remained in the church only because it was the only thing you knew/were allowed to believe in, or if there were other reasons for you choosing to remain a member.

I knew it was only a matter of time before this was picked up by this particular sub. Get ready for a detailed exposition from the Holy Fathers about why Catholics are worse than pagans.

Here's the essence of the post, reasoning from statements of the sometime fascist sympathizer Velimirovich and his disciple Popovic:

St. Nikolai Velimirovic calls christian herersy -catholicism and protestantism - worse than paganism.

Words to the Serbian People through the Dungeon Window ~ What is Europe? Heresy. It is heresy. First of all, the papist heresy then the Lutheran heresy... Europe is heresy And any Christian heresy is worse than oaganism

Likewise, St. Justin Popovich says similar. He calls Roman Catholicism a "European Humanism". and this Humanism inevitably descends into atheism:

The Orthodox Church and Ecumenism ~ the anti-evangelical principle was borrowed from papism as a reliaious European humanism by all other trends of European humanism...papist humanism. Humanism inevitably develops into atheism, passes through anarchism, and culminates in nihilism. If someone is a atheist todav, know that if they are consistent, they will be an anarchist tomorrow, and a nihilist the day after.

https://www.reddit.com/r/ChristianOrthodoxy/s/ks8W7xgNnb

To me the idea of having something so heavy on your chest that you go into a dark room to tell someone instead of a professional psychiatrist who knows how to help you instead of saying "Well, keep praying, it'll get better, keep doing the same frickin thing you're doing that's not helping" it just makes me go insane, like, tell someone who can actually help you.

is it just me or is there not enough young adults in the Orthodox Church?

We are hearing of a revival of Gen Z's going back to the pews in the more traditional churches, like Catholic and Orthodox, but whenever I go to church it's just old people.

Do you guys see anyone in the 18-27 age range at church or am I imagining things?

I was venting on r/orthodoxy about the recent problems I had with orthobros it really gets to me what they say. I talked about how I have ocd and how one of my obsessions was wanting to destroy icons and stuff. I’ve always had these urges but they were magnified by the situation with the orthobros. They told me I was silly for listening to them and that I was acting like a child. I don’t know what to do they made fun of me for being a catholic which I mentioned amongst other things. I just really want to hear someone who speaks with God and know that I am loved. I’m sorry