r/askgaybros

What the fuck is going on. It’s all I can think about, it’s like tunnel vision. I met a girl on Facebook in a l rave group and she invited me to a local show. Paid for my ticket and drinks. Her friend… 24 year old frat guy. We took a white Rolex pill and within an hour I felt an instant attraction. I’ve gone to rave party’s consistently for a year and I’ve rolled plenty of times before, but I’ve never felt such a strong urge in my entire life. By the end of the night she was furious and my new friend and I were making out all over the barn, ended up getting a cheap hotel room and he gave me the best head I’ve ever gotten while I scrolled through reels on my phone. Why am I still thinking about it a day later sober?

I shared my story about how my friend described the guy I find attractive as ugly and called me weird for liking him. I mean I get it he isn't conventionally attractive he is a bit older (I'm 21 and he was in his 40s), fat, a bit hairy and does not have great facial features (double chin and other not attractive attributes) but honestly I don't really mind. I like these types of guys.

After some time I started talking with this guy and it turns out he is bi and we hooked up. it was one of the best hookups. he fucked me really nicely I was craving more in the end. Just because someone doesn't look nice doesn't mean they aren't good in bed.

we have been in touch too. he is quite a lonely guy and he told me that he felt like I was pranking him when I asked him for a hookup because he doesn't get these opportunities. And I can feel how good and appreciated he felt while he was fucking me as if it was a rare thing for him. honestly loved that attention. Gotta get fucked by more guys like him in the future.

Im a college senior two of my close friends pulled an April Fools prank on me with the help of a club we’re all in (which I’m president of).

For some background information, I’m pretty out at my college and I do act pretty feminine and 98% of people assume I’m gay when they first meet me. However, my parents are very religious and outwardly homophobic. So at college there’s some people who know my family and shouldn’t know I’m gay.

I also have had horrible luck with guys. I haven’t been fully out since college but I’ve been rejected a bunch and just haven’t had any success (like I’ve only kissed one guy my whole life). Something I’m pretty insecure about.

My two friends are both very much aware of this.

In my clubs organization slack, there was private channel where all of this was getting planned for 3 days. So the prank involved my friends tabling (tabling is having a tabled set-up with promotional materials to advertise a club, cause, etc) with people from my club (from 10 AM - 4 PM) at our busiest part of campus for the “[my initials] philanthropy organization” and in hopes to find me a bf. They hand painted a banner with a rainbow flag, painted my face and put the the name of the “philanthropy organization”. They printer over 350 flyers titled “Me (or a friend) wnats Julian” with a QR code for a survey where they can put an Instagram handle and phone number. People who were tabling were instructed by my close friend to say things like

- excuse me, are you attracted to men? ,

-have you heard of the [my initials] philanthropy organization?

• hi! do you find this man attractive?

• hi! are you gay by any chance?

At the end of the day my friend planned to use the information and make a gc with me plus all the guys interested in me.

I didn’t catch wind of what was happening til a friend of a friend texted me an hour into the prank and was like did you know this was happening. I called my close friend who was leading this to take it down cuz there’s some people who go here who can’t know I’m gay. He immediately stopped it and apologized over the phone. On the phone after he apologized, he ended it with “do you want the numbers of the guys who were interested in you?” And that made me livid because how tone deaf it was. When I initially found out, I didn’t know who was involved or wha they were exactly doing at tabling. All I knew was that the were tabling me to find a bf.

On Friday, that’s where I learned more details (like how far out it was planned, what the banner looked like, there was a sign up sheet for people to table). And the worst of it all was some of my close friends who know my religious trauma and history with guys who were celebrating and many others being sad when they had to stop the prank saying things like “NOO WE WERE SO CLSOE”. And this just pissed me off because the prank on top of the potential outing it felt so humiliating.

So in our slack channel I sent the following message

“Hey all I just wanted to address what was happening in here.

First off this was potentially life altering for me. My parents don’t know I’m gay and are outwardly homophobic. I’ve had to deny my sexuality to them multiple times. There are some people who go here who know my family and don’t know I’m gay. This prank put me at risk. I’m very disappointed because some people here know my story. Even if you didn’t, it’s never your right to assume if a queer persons is fully out. And queer people don’t owe sharing their trauma to anyone.

Second of all this prank was straight up embarrassing, humiliating, and demeaning. No matter what your intentions were, this felt like you guys were first making fun and targeting me for my sexuality (just ask yourself if you would do this for straight person) and making fun of the fact my history with guys (or lack thereof). And some people here are aware of the latter. This is genuinely some prank that straight guys would do in high school to make fun of that one gay kid in their class.

I was and still am genuinely hurt by this prank because I’ve been so vulnerable with some of you and have told people here how much I’ve struggled with my sexuality.

I feel like there’s genuinely no excuse for this. It seems like this has been something very planned and thought about and not once anyone thought there was something wrong with this. I would appreciate if we never talk about this again and please don’t message me with an apology; I just need some time and space to still process everything.”

So sorry for the long post. In the moment ,i was proud of myself for standing up for myself and letting people know what they did was wrong. But i have a tendency to over think things and I’m not sure if I overreacted or if it wasn’t that deep. Thank you in advanced for any advice.

I want a man to care about me and I want to care about him.

But it's supposed to be other way. A man should protect and care his wife and kids.

It feels really out of balance since I am a grown *ss man and I can take care of myself.

But my weird brain wants a daddy and my body feeds me with happy dopamin bombs every time I am craving.

I nut it off, but it keeps coming back.

I dont need it, but I want it and I don't understand why nature wants me to live this way. It's unlogical for me.

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I'm 33 years old and have never experimented with my sexuality but have always been curious. I always dismissed the feeling for a lot of reasons, mostly due to fear of judgment. Now that I'm in my 30s, the feelings are becoming increasingly hard to ignore. It started off as a little glance at guys now I'm full-on checking them out and having sexual fantasies.

Maybe one of these days I'll make a reality. Any tips for starting out? For my people who found the courage to explore their sexuality later in life, how was it?

so i think i might be wired differently than most guys lol

like 2-3 years ago i posted a gloryhole clip on a gay forum. the guy had a really fit back and when he turned around after finishing, his cock was also nice. i thought it was hot.

got comments like "how is this hot? can't even see the cock, that's where the action is." then on a different post where it was all cock and sucking, that one blew up with praise.

i was genuinely baffled.

fast forward to now and i actually do porn myself, i also film and produce. when i shoot i focus on the whole thing — face, cock, body, everything together. but a lot of my competitors in the edging niche just zoom in on the cock the whole time, sometimes with really low quality cameras too. those posts get way more likes and shares.

meanwhile when i put something out and think "ok this looks actually good, this is hot" it barely gets any engagement. so i started doing this reverse psychology thing where i post what i personally think is NOT hot, and those ones blow up every time. kinda drives me crazy honestly.

maybe i just don't know what's hot to other people. or taste really is just that different.

because cock alone on screen does literally nothing for me. doesn't matter how nice it is. i need to see the face or the physique, the full person. then it works. but just cock with no context? zero reaction.

so how many of you can actually get going from cock alone with no body or face? and if you had to rank what gets you most, what order?

mine is body > face > cock

I’m only posting this because I’m trying to see if others can relate and how did they get through it.

So I’m Hispanic and in a Hispanic household it’s very difficult to be true to yourself and easily come out. I came out to family when I was 18 and as I expected I got a lot hate from my parents. My two older sisters were the only ones supportive and tried to help calm everything down but it really wasn’t easy to. My parents eventually decided to kick me out the house which was pretty heavy for me due to me still being in high school at that time.

My sisters secretly helped out by getting an apartment for me. I currently now pay for it now.

Now my question is how do you get over the fact my parents act like I don’t exist?

It’s been two years soon to be three years since my parents kicked me out and erased my existence. And yet that still hurts and irritates me.

And you’re going to be hateful just don’t bother commenting pls.

So I live in a shared house and one of my roommates (25ish M) who is straight, kinda acts different when he’s just home with us vs when his girlfriend comes to visit. They are in a long distance relationship and I feel like every time she’s visiting he kinda acts “colder” towards me (I’m gay). Not in a rude way but more as in more evasive, distant, aloof. Not sure if he’s just focusing all his energy and attention to her when she’s here but once she’s gone, he clearly shifts back into more of a “chatty” vibe and will even smile more at me. Haven’t really felt like he was flirting or anything but I just wonder what happens…maybe I should ask this at “Ask Straight Bros”? LOL (Which I’m absolutely not part of).

i am basically 95% bottom, with almost no féminin traits or traditionally "bottom" traits, it's easy enough on the apps to specify your type and prefrences, but in real life (and especially clubs and bars) ... it doesn't feel right to directly ask someone if he's a top when he approaches me ! i feel liki it kills the vibe, and i just generally do not enjoy being approached by bottoms just cuz of my "masculinity". i even thought of wearing shirts that explicitly say "bottom" when i go clubbing 😆😆.\

how do u guys deal with this

Could I have a sex life? I've been trying to become sexually active, but I run into so many road blocks that I wonder if it's even possible for me. I live in a small town to start off, (I can't move.) Apps like Grindr both scare and piss me off. I don’t feel all that comfortable with meeting people for sex I've never met in real life and I hate all of the fake profiles, they are the only ones that seem to message me. The rare times I go to a gay bar or any gay themed place in the city there is another problem. It is illegal to have sex with someone in more private places of the business (bathrooms or cruising places for example). Sex parties are another difficult situation as I'm an outsider and on a personal note, I don't have any friends to share any information like that with me and I don't know how to make any. On another personal note there's another problem that maybe I'm just ugly, I'm overweight and the gay community; I've noticed is remarkably shallow. I've been trying to lose weight in the hopes that it will improve my chances and appearance. I'm never looked at in a lustful way by anyone, or not by anyone that I know of. I don’t see how I can have a sex life. And finally I take my sexual health seriously I require condoms (a deal breaker,) since I refuse to be one of those irresponsible people that don't think STI's and STD's are no big deal. I don’t see how I can have a sex life with.

My boyfriend (top) and I (bottom) have been together for 7 years. He’s 37 and I’m 26. We usually have sex 2 a week because I need time to recover — he has a thick 8.5-inch dick and is very dominant. The sex has always felt good, but over time it became pretty routine. Even after 7 years of bottoming, taking his size can still be difficult sometimes, especially because he likes to go in quite fast.

But after our last trip to Tokyo, something changed. We discovered a new position and my hole suddenly became super relaxed. Now it takes his entire dick with almost no resistance, and we both feel nothing but intense pleasure. We have to try really hard not to cum too quickly, lol.

Want to know what the position is? He’s tall, well-built, and muscular, while I’m a twink. He starts by fucking me doggy style for a couple of minutes, then we lie down on the bed. I get on my stomach and pull my legs back towards my head. He then lies completely on top of me, pressing me into the mattress. In this position, I feel like a total whore — he slides balls-deep into me with his full size and just fucks me hard.

Maybe it sounds cliché and you already know this position, but I still wanted to share my little story. I’m honestly the happiest I’ve been in a long time. It’s been a week and I’m literally begging him to fuck me twice a day 😂 I know things might go back to normal once the excitement wears off, but right now I’m in heaven (sorry for posting this on Holy Saturday 😭).

Straight friends have claimed when in a locker room settings, they don’t look at other men’s dicks

Okay, so by the time I came out around age 16, I had only encountered bi guys. I flirted with about seven of them and dated two—one for four years and the other for seven months.

In my experience, the first guy I dated didn’t even consider that he had “lost his virginity” with me because I was a man, and he hadn’t had sex with a woman yet. He used to say I was just a phase and that he would eventually marry a woman and have children. Despite all of this, I continued the relationship because I was so young. I didn’t have internalized homophobia before, but after that relationship, I started hating myself in a way I couldn’t even explain. Later on, he came out as gay, though.

The second one was perhaps the worst example. He told me I should get bottom surgery and said a man with a vagina is even hotter, while also making me do all the chores and housework. Eventually, he cheated on me, left me for my girl childhood best friend of 8 years, and called me disgusting names with awful homophobia.

After that, I tried dating again and told myself I shouldn’t judge someone just because they’re bi. But the experiences were somehow even worse. One guy joked that he would marry a “virgin” girl from a village, and I completely lost it and cut him off. Later, I got good vibes from another guy, but he said he doesn’t date gay men and only uses them for sex because of societal pressure, since he doesn’t want to disappoint his family. Meanwhile, I feel like I don’t even have the option not to be a disappointment. Then he said I wasn’t a “dirty” person and that he didn’t want to be someone who would “take my innocence” or “use me” like others.

Now I feel extreme discomfort when talking to bi guys, thinking the same pattern will repeat. I really don’t want to be ignorant or anything—I just can’t help it.

So I've been a bottom most of my sexual life and I love it. What an incredible feeling it is to have my lover(s) devour, worship, and explore my ... well you get the picture.

I have topped a handful of times, but only twice to completion while engaging with my first love. I do have a deep appreciation for a man's posterior. I enjoy eating it, spanking it, exploring with my fingers, and recently topped a very plump booty. No release though.

Here's the problem and the hope:

I'm very inexperienced topping and that leads to insecurity. Obviously practice makes perfect, but in the context of the hookup culture where everyone is chasing their next dopamine high, it's not easy to ask for patience while I figure out how to pleasure him while also trying to experience pleasure myself.

I want to get more experience and eventually be that vers guy (who still prefers bottoming) that I know I am.

I'm likely overthinking it.

Any insight on this, oh great reddit gays?

So I hookup a lot at least once a week or sometimes I go month without any hookup. I've been hookingup since 16 and now I'm 23. So in all these years I've met n number of tops, I seriously don't even have count. Many of them have asked for recording the session where I've given them the permission for recording. Now I wonder how many such tops have my videos and what they are even doing with it. This thought is scaring me lol. I neither have their contact or in touch with them. But all I know so many tops have asked for recording the session. I'm just worried. Anyone in a similar situation?

So I answered an add on Doublelist (not the best hookup site) and ended up getting together at his house. This was my first encounter in a few years. The guy had advertised that he wanted someone to suck him off and seeing how that is what I crave the most, I was happy to oblige. Things went great at first - we actually kissed and had an intimate moment before I started sucking him. Every time he got close to cumming he asked me to slow down and I have to admit, after 15 minutes of sucking, I wanted it to be over. I was getting bored. When he finally came, he basically would not look at me and wanted me to leave as quickly as possible. Is it normal for guys who just want to be sucked to want you to perform for so long?

So I was talking to a friend about this the other day, and it got me thinking how you do it.

I personally do, because I learned it like that from my parents and it just feels cleaner to me. But my friend was like nah, just shake it off, and now I’m wondering how common each approach actually is. What do you do and why?

Is it more about habit, how you were raised, or just personal preference?

My boyfriend (24M) and I (21M) have been dating for almost a year, and things have been going really well. We’ve talked about moving in together around the 2-year mark and have agreed that we want pets in the future, but no children.

For some context: I’ve had pets my entire life. When I moved countries, I had to leave my two cats behind with my family because it was too expensive to bring them with me. I really miss having my own pet. Right now, I live with two flatmates, and I have a stable job. My boyfriend and I don’t live together yet.

Recently, a friend offered me the chance to adopt a 5-year-old cat for free. I got really excited about it, but when I told my boyfriend, he got very upset.

He said he wants us to get a pet together after we move in, and that he doesn’t want it to feel like “my pet,” but rather “our pet.” He also said he’s always wanted the experience of raising a kitten, since he’s never had cats before. He feels that I already have that experience and could help with raising one in the future (which I’m totally open to).

I understand where he’s coming from, but at the same time, I don’t see why me getting a cat now should be such a big issue, especially since we don’t live together yet and won’t for at least another year.

Am I missing something here? Is this reasonable from him, or is he overreacting?

TL;DR: Boyfriend doesn't want me to get a cat before we move in together because he wants it to be "our cat". Is this reasonable?

Without opening up the relationship or bringing in a third