u/seaair1185

Why do places on here have so many rules? You can't talk about this, you can't say this! I wanted to post normal stuff on any section and I'm met with a blockage. Even the vent subreddit has rules!! It should be a place where you speak freely. When I was on Reddit in the early years, I could post half the things I wanted to. Now you need X amount of karma, you need to wait for moderation. Yes! These steps are important — I get it! But I have nowhere to freely express anything! 😭

Even basic things I feel like are blocked. What a joke half of these things are…

Finding ways to combat AI is growing increasingly difficult. The other day, I posted a vent online (unrelated to AI) and found people calling my own experiences wrong! Said it felt like a generative story.

I have used writing for venting but also for finding new and exciting ways to create. And because I tend to use the em dash a lot, it's my favourite form of punctuation, it’s raised a few questions. I really dislike how a simple thing like this has been ruined. Continuing, I tend to draw, and the anxiety surrounding that is increasing day by day.

How have you combatted AI accusations? It’s so hard to publish or put out any creative media in the coming ages…

My dad and I are in a parking lot. He tells me to turn, and I freeze for a moment. (I had just released the bite point, therefore having the car move)

He reaches over to grab the wheel since there is a bush in front of us. I fully let off the clutch — the car suddenly increases in speed. I don't know if I accidentally rested on the acceleration or not, in my heart I feel like I didn't.

Long story short - we end up in a bush. No damage… Thankfully. But my ego is shattered. Yet, I look to my dad and I see war in his eyes. He stares at me for a moment. Then a quick:

“Alright yeah, get out.” with a nod.

Then we switch seats and the drive home is silent.

First time in a car, ever. Never read anything about cars, somehow when I first got in he said:

“Okay, we will go forward around this curb. Drive till the end, turn and go back around.”

Safe to say — we did not do that.

I honestly feel embarrassed to even step into a car again. He had really high hopes for me… 😭😭

Update: small amount of damage. Never felt so much guilt in my life…

Being sensitive ruined my relationship, let my emotions be a lesson.

I shut down a lot. Asked for reassurance on all of that. For example, one of the big ending things of our relationship was my emotions. Every talk which muttered the word “break-up” resulted in instant tears. Then, I would try to push for conversation but then my ex felt guilty. It made resentment grow.

Near the end, they shared a few deep things and I responded in tears. Since, it's crazy to think the person you love could go through that. But I shut down. Never truly forgave me after that.

Now, when we broke up, I went out drinking with a friend. When I got home, being me, I spewed nonsense the typical begging. The next morning they had said:

I never think. My emotions control me.

I hurt people with this.

I'm cruel.

They hate me for this and will never get over it.

And I can't be angry. I don't even feel like I'm allowed to cry now, because all I am is an emotional burden. Being emotional and crying destroyed our connection. Anytime I did something wrong I felt the tears well, and I said I'm sorry. Then, they would say something slightly off and I would cry. I don't have anyone stable right now — and talking about emotions after this feels like hell. I don't feel comfortable feeling now.

So let my story be a lesson. Please, get the help and emotional support you need before it all explodes.

First break-up. Really don't know what to do. I’m 19, together for 3 years. I never had my dad’s love, he’s very old school. Says it's women’s only thing to be sad and, well… he’s a depressed alcoholic. Said he isn't trained to handle my emotions when I cry. Or feel anything. In fact, he laughed when I told him about this.

Really needing that support. I felt so heartbroken. I’ve gotten drunk, I’ve cried. But it's fresh. It’s been 3 days. No friends. No job. I miss my dad.

Just found out my dad never took my breakup seriously. So, all the support I've gotten from it feels fucking fake.

“Oh, it must be serious! You’re not wearing your promise ring anymore!”

“Oh, why aren't you going out today together?”

“You changed your wallpaper from her, aww! Take a look *mother’s name.*”

All while I was acivetly drinking myself to fucking death the other day and crying. Are you fucking kidding me? I feel so ANGRY. Because I've felt so alone. I have ZERO fucking friends. I can't be alone because I think of dying. I’ve tried and tried. Are you fucking kidding me? My ex has been texting me today about how she’s talking to people and missing sex.

I'm supposed to be fucking stable now?? You know, after the breakup she told me:

“You never think you only act on your emotions.”

WELL WHO AM I TO FUCKING KID WHEN EVERYONE SEEMS TO HATE ME? God, I'm so upset and angry. I'm fucking drinking again tonight I don't give a fuck what they all say. They can judge as much as they like for all I care. I hope this can fucking kill me in the end.

Recently broken up with my girlfriend. Not looking for a rebound… but just trying to navigate now.

I self-harm, have disordered eating, and scars littering my body.

There is no way I am going to let anyone new in. My scars, my body issues, nothing. I don't want to let anyone in.

How would you go about this? Talking to someone new… explaining all of this again, when it was already hard to say to my ex. Even to friends — they don't know it. How do I even say it to them? If they care.

It’s been 3 days. On the first day, people cared. Now? They don't! What's the point of it all? I’m so fucking alone. No friends. No job. No loving parents. The one person who cared for me is gone. And clearly, doesn’t like me anymore let alone love me?

What a selfish cruel world. The only person you can ever have is yourself. Even then, better hope you can manage yourself alone!

recently got broken up with and i don’t really care if she sees this, read on if you must.

i went out drinking, kinda, when it first happened. found a friend, got a few drinks and drunk them. it feels freeing to step back from it all for a bit. anyway, i was beyond drunk… i went home cried it out to my dad. although i was mean. said things like “you’re an alcoholic, how can you drink all the time, why do you do it?” it hurt his feelings. one bridge burnt for a while. then, i spammed her with messages — in all honestly i don’t remember exactly what i said. but i was sobbing and probably said things like i miss you, you know typically stuff.

fast forward next day — it must have been pretty bad. since, she soon said:

it was the most cruelest thing i’ve ever done.

she hates me for it.

it was selfish in other words.

she’s going to block me if i do it again.

don’t blame her for this. she wanted a conversation after she broke up with me. wanted to talk, and i wanted to forget.

fast foward more, i was doing sure “okay”. we found a stable ground for talking and it continued. but, last night. my parents returned to their normal judgemental selves. my dad got more alcohol — drunk more and turned mean. said things like:

everyone around you is going to die, then you’ll have no one.

i think im going to kick you out of bed tonight, i want it instead.

why are you still trying to talk to her.

cheap, shallow shit. but it hurts. i tried to reach out to my friend who i went out drinking with. it’s been a day and she hasn’t responded to me since the drinking. we left on good terms — why isn’t she talking to me? texted another friend and they left me on read. all at the same time my now ex texted, “i have so much more personality now, i don’t have to think about texting people as often. i’m finding new pieces of myself, it’s nice :)”

all nice things. happy for you, don’t get it wrong. but fucking ouch for the time. i’ve never felt this alone. and sometimes i feel like im stupid for being stuck in the past, or even trying anymore. my mum is going back to work soon — she’s been my only constant person ive been around. i can’t be alone, in other terms. i don’t know what i’m going to do afterwards.