u/krishnakanthb13

• After deciding to move on, I decided on

1. No Contact
2. Deleted Photos
3. Stored all Gifts separately, for now

• When trying to move on, I am trying for traditional dating process.
• I want to speak to someone, and I just end up avoiding the situation.
• After at home, thinking that I did not talk to that person, I feel sad.
• Automatically, my mind starts maladaptive dreaming, thinking what all I spoken.
• Immediatly, I start dreaming and running into fantacies.
• Ends up in porn and mastrubation.
• Mind becomes blank and resets.
• Wake up in the same place where it all started. Zero Again.

How do I come out of this situation?

• After deciding to move on, I decided on

1. No Contact
2. Deleted Photos
3. Stored all Gifts separately, for now

• When trying to move on, I am trying for traditional dating process.
• I want to speak to someone, and I just end up avoiding the situation.
• After at home, thinking that I did not talk to that person, I feel sad.
• Automatically, my mind starts maladaptive dreaming, thinking what all I spoken.
• Immediatly, I start dreaming and running into fantacies.
• Ends up in porn and mastrubation.
• Mind becomes blank and resets.
• Wake up in the same place where it all started. Zero Again.

How do I come out of this situation?

• After deciding to move on, I decided on

1. No Contact
2. Deleted Photos
3. Stored all Gifts separately, for now

• When trying to move on, I am trying for traditional dating process.
• I want to speak to someone, and I just end up avoiding the situation.
• After at home, thinking that I did not talk to that person, I feel sad.
• Automatically, my mind starts maladaptive dreaming, thinking what all I spoken.
• Immediatly, I start dreaming and running into fantacies.
• Ends up in porn and mastrubation.
• Mind becomes blank and resets.
• Wake up in the same place where it all started. Zero Again.

How do I come out of this situation?

• After deciding to move on, I decided on

1. No Contact
2. Deleted Photos
3. Stored all Gifts separately, for now

• When trying to move on, I am trying for traditional dating process.
• I want to speak to someone, and I just end up avoiding the situation.
• After at home, thinking that I did not talk to that person, I feel sad.
• Automatically, my mind starts maladaptive dreaming, thinking what all I spoken.
• Immediatly, I start dreaming and running into fantacies.
• Ends up in porn and mastrubation.
• Mind becomes blank and resets.
• Wake up in the same place where it all started. Zero Again.

How do I come out of this situation?

• After deciding to move on, I decided on

1. No Contact
2. Deleted Photos
3. Stored all Gifts separately, for now

• When trying to move on, I am trying for traditional dating process.
• I want to speak to someone, and I just end up avoiding the situation.
• After at home, thinking that I did not talk to that person, I feel sad.
• Automatically, my mind starts maladaptive dreaming, thinking what all I spoken.
• Immediatly, I start dreaming and running into fantacies.
• Ends up in porn and mastrubation.
• Mind becomes blank and resets.
• Wake up in the same place where it all started. Zero Again.

How do I come out of this situation?

• 2 Years love.
• Breakup,
  • When she started deleting her chats on phone. When she started hiding or giving silence as response. When she quickly tells me what she did in her day, and cuts the call. Later realized that she was speaking and having sexual conversations with her jodi, that her family searched for her.
  • As she hid all her past physical connections and breakups. (Revealed when her parents started finding her a match). Still I do not know the details, it cripples me, or makes me feel like I am burning with anger.
• When all these were happening, she never had the guts to close things properly - even say lets breakup, or its over, nothing as such. Till date, she has kept me hanging dry.

---

• I kept No Contact, for 6 years.
• I crawled into depression for a year. Forgot everything, felt grateful that I survived.
• She contacted somehow, in that situation, I just started speaking to her.
• It is been 6 years, was never able to express my feelings to anyone. Huge Resistance inside. She keep contacting me On and Off, sudden ghosting, part by part on questions, she reveals her past as hints, maybe just to keep me on the trip.

---

• I have gone through depression 3 times, I had to leave the company I was working 3 times, (first two times, I absconded).
• All the psychoses, depression, and insecurity, started when I realized, that everyone who spoke to me and asked about to me, where her informants or mouth pieces, she used them to get in touch with me. She also got in touch with some of my colleagues at my work place. Realized that she did similar things back when we were in a relationship
• I realized all these, still it hurts, felt a lot of years got spoilt, and turned to digitally and physically isolate myself, unresponsive to everyone who reach out to me.

---

• I always saw the relationship with a innocence lenses, as it was my first and only till now. I found many opportunities, which could have been a wonderful relationship by now, some kind of resistance, which I have not conquered or crossed yet or come to acceptance.

---

• I reached out for help in therapy.
• I am on medication.
• I am trying to recover and heal.
• Hoping for a better life and relationship.

• 2 Years love.
• Breakup,
  • When she started deleting her chats on phone. When she started hiding or giving silence as response. When she quickly tells me what she did in her day, and cuts the call. Later realized that she was speaking and having sexual conversations with her jodi, that her family searched for her.
  • As she hid all her past physical connections and breakups. (Revealed when her parents started finding her a match). Still I do not know the details, it cripples me, or makes me feel like I am burning with anger.
• When all these were happening, she never had the guts to close things properly - even say lets breakup, or its over, nothing as such. Till date, she has kept me hanging dry.

---

• I kept No Contact, for 6 years.
• I crawled into depression for a year. Forgot everything, felt grateful that I survived.
• She contacted somehow, in that situation, I just started speaking to her.
• It is been 6 years, was never able to express my feelings to anyone. Huge Resistance inside. She keep contacting me On and Off, sudden ghosting, part by part on questions, she reveals her past as hints, maybe just to keep me on the trip.

---

• I have gone through depression 3 times, I had to leave the company I was working 3 times, (first two times, I absconded).
• All the psychoses, depression, and insecurity, started when I realized, that everyone who spoke to me and asked about to me, where her informants or mouth pieces, she used them to get in touch with me. She also got in touch with some of my colleagues at my work place. Realized that she did similar things back when we were in a relationship
• I realized all these, still it hurts, felt a lot of years got spoilt, and turned to digitally and physically isolate myself, unresponsive to everyone who reach out to me.

---

• I always saw the relationship with a innocence lenses, as it was my first and only till now. I found many opportunities, which could have been a wonderful relationship by now, some kind of resistance, which I have not conquered or crossed yet or come to acceptance.

---

• I reached out for help in therapy.
• I am on medication.
• I am trying to recover and heal.
• Hoping for a better life and relationship.

• 2 Years love.
• Breakup,
  • When she started deleting her chats on phone. When she started hiding or giving silence as response. When she quickly tells me what she did in her day, and cuts the call. Later realized that she was speaking and having sexual conversations with her jodi, that her family searched for her.
  • As she hid all her past physical connections and breakups. (Revealed when her parents started finding her a match). Still I do not know the details, it cripples me, or makes me feel like I am burning with anger.
• When all these were happening, she never had the guts to close things properly - even say lets breakup, or its over, nothing as such. Till date, she has kept me hanging dry.

---

• I kept No Contact, for 6 years.
• I crawled into depression for a year. Forgot everything, felt grateful that I survived.
• She contacted somehow, in that situation, I just started speaking to her.
• It is been 6 years, was never able to express my feelings to anyone. Huge Resistance inside. She keep contacting me On and Off, sudden ghosting, part by part on questions, she reveals her past as hints, maybe just to keep me on the trip.

---

• I have gone through depression 3 times, I had to leave the company I was working 3 times, (first two times, I absconded).
• All the psychoses, depression, and insecurity, started when I realized, that everyone who spoke to me and asked about to me, where her informants or mouth pieces, she used them to get in touch with me. She also got in touch with some of my colleagues at my work place. Realized that she did similar things back when we were in a relationship
• I realized all these, still it hurts, felt a lot of years got spoilt, and turned to digitally and physically isolate myself, unresponsive to everyone who reach out to me.

---

• I always saw the relationship with a innocence lenses, as it was my first and only till now. I found many opportunities, which could have been a wonderful relationship by now, some kind of resistance, which I have not conquered or crossed yet or come to acceptance.

---

• I reached out for help in therapy.
• I am on medication.
• I am trying to recover and heal.
• Hoping for a better life and relationship.