u/Classic-Fix7304

I really want this older guy at my gym to talk to me. I could also talk to him but i psych myself out every time i see him so thats currently not an option. Im pretty confident that he’s into me but just doesn’t want to approach me because im younger and because im a girl and were at the gym.

There have been only a couple of times where we were very close to each other and i thought i saw him start to approach me, but then i ended up Being approached by someone else. I sometimes am catching up with other gym regulars or i am being blatantly hit on but since me and him were already in such close contact, i think hes overheard these conversations ive had Cuz he doesn’t really wear headphones or anything like that either.

conversations are usually pretty short and im friendly to anyone who talks to me unless theyre being creepy which is usually not the case. I would assume that if he overhears me being friendly then he’ll be more inclined to talk to me but at the same time multiple guys approaching me may actually make me seem less approachable. But however there was a single time where he was directly beside me and another guy came up to me. This other guy told me he saw me every single day and thought i was cute. I was rly thrown off and instinctively said “oh I’ve never seen you before” it probably came off as rude but it was rly out of the blue and i panicked. I’m pretty sure he heard me since he was right next to me and he kept looking over at us during our conversation. After that i was obviously very friendly towards him and i hadn’t intended on being rude

now im only asking because at first when guys were approaching me in front of him i thought it was a good thing and hed think ” oh she doesnt mind being approached “ but tbh from my perspective, he doesn’t talk to anyone at the gym and i think i prefer that opposed to him being very friendly with everyone. The other day a girl asked to work in with him and he said literally nothing to her the entire time and i was somewhat relieved that it was that way 🙃 but that could just be personal preference/gender thing. Idk! plz lmk what yall think

i have a crush on an older guy at my gym. I dont feel comfortable going up to him and blatantly introducing myself and i have yet to find an opportunity to ask him about anything workout related so i wanted to come on here and ask what strategy would be good to talk to him. (for context, i do think its reciprocated based off body language, but he does look about 5-10 years older than me)

so a couple months ago, a (different) guy was working out beside me. he was fiddling with his chain for a good minute before he turned to me and asked if i could help put it on for him. of course i said yes and when i finsihed, he started talking to me. it was super friendly he was just saying hello and thank you and since then he always comes up and starts conversation with me at the gym. it’s all platonic. idk if he talked to me just because i was next to him, or if its bc im a girl, or because im a regular at the gym and id seen him many times at this point but nonetheless it got us talking.

i was thinking of doing the same to my gym crush and asking him to help me with my necklace or bracelet since we often end up next to each other when we work out. if he says yes and doesn’t start conversation from there, i dont trust myself to start talking to him like that other guy did with me. i was wondering whats the likelihood of him talking to me after i break the ice, considering im like 99% sure he’s equally attracted to me. and is this a good idea? would it work on you if it happened to you? or is there a better idea that isnt just cold approaching him? please help a girl out

I’ve been crushing on this older guy at my gym for so many months now. I think it’s mutual but i was always waiting for him to talk to me but i was told its never going to happen since im younger and he probably doesnt want to make me uncomfortable or come off as creepy.

i dont see him often usually only once a week on mondays so im hoping i see him today and i can finally talk to him. I probably wont hit on him or anything I’m just trying to break the ice and probably ask to work into one of his work outs but wish me luck or give me advice on what to say to him if i see him😅🙏

context: I’m f22, i think he’s m26-34. it started probably like around a year ago, i noticed him looking at me a lot. at first i wasn’t particularly attracted to him (hes attractive, i just hadn’t developed any feelings towards him) and i only see him once every week or so and tbh i kept forgetting about him until the next time i would see him. randomly idk what flipped but these last couple of months ive been DESPERATE for him. Weve never talked but theres so much eye contact that it feels intentional and theres been other little moments. at first i was waiting for him to approach me but i got told very bluntly that its never going to happen because 1, I’m young and 2, I’m a girl at the gym. so i guess it’s up to me to talk to him

im pretty shy and the only people i talk to at my gym are people who have approached me first. I know everyone is going to tell me “just talk to him idk any man who wouldnt like being approached by a girl!” But thats not my style and i just cant force myself to do that.

my ideal scenario would be that he’s using a machine that i actually intend on Using. I walk up to him and ask how many sets he has left or if i can work in. Problem is i dont really see him much and when i do we aren’t usually hitting the same muscle group. The last time i saw him he was actually using a machine i wanted and when i finished my set i was going to go up to him, but another girl had already gone up to him to work in 🙃 this felt so unlucky because I’ve never seen him talk to anyone before and ofc the one time i decide to, someone else got to it first.

a couple months ago a (different) guy came up to me to ask me to help him put on his necklace. Now idk if he asked me because im a woman, or because i was close by, or just because he recognized me from being a regular at the gym but ever since i helped him, we talk every day at the gym and were pretty chill now :) i was thinking of doing something similar with my gym crush. I was thinking i could tangle my necklaces and ask him to help me untangle them or to struggle putting on my bracelet and ask him for help, but would it be weird for me to go up to *him* for help? Hes an older guy and there are plenty of women at my gym for me to be able to find one to ask for help. He would also have to conveniently be near me for that to work as it’d be kinda strange for me to walk halfway across the gym to ask him to help with my jewelry lol.

i know im overthinking this, but i never know when the next time ill see him is. I really want to talk to him but i dont have the courage to do it without reason so i just really need help with what approach to take.

both f22

earlier this year my friend got into a relationship and stopped hang around me. every time i tried to make plans with her it was like pulling teeth because she refused to commit to anything (probably bc she wouldve rather hung out with her boyfriend). I ended up talking to her about it after months of no hang outs, no texts. I thought it would just be me getting things off my chest, she’d realize how i feel, apologize and we’d move on. thats unfortunately not how it went.

she never apologized and she said she was so busy she wouldn’t be able to hang out with me unless i scheduled it months in advance… i felt a little disrespected because i wasn’t even just texting her to let her know we hadn’t hung out, it was also about the fact that she never reached out via text or call just to check in on me and she just doubled down and said she was too busy to do that.

i decided not to respond because what she said made me so upset. Id thought that if i responded i wouldve made everything worse so i decided to give it time and see if she would reach out, like how i communicated.

its been months and she hasn’t reached out. We still have each others locations and are on each other’s private stories but it’s starting to make me uncomfortable as we aren’t really friends anymore and haven’t spoken in months. I havent even seen her since last year.

i do miss her a lot, but this situation showed a side of her that i can’t really forgive. I keep thinking of what to do. I want to have another talk with her but i feel like my feelings were already well communicated and she disregarded them so i dont want to have to put myself out there. I was also just thinking of just removing her from everything because it does make me uncomfortable that were still sharing locations and things like that…

we were really good friends before all of this went down but ive built up so much anger in my heart for her :/ idk what to do

I have an eye contact relationship with this guy at my gym. I’ve been dying to talk to him but I’m pretty shy and definitely not the type of person to walk up to a stranger, introduce myself, and tell them they’re cute. So i thought taking a more subtle/long game approach would work better. I thought I’d just walk up to him and ask how many sets he has left, something like that. I was hoping that eventually talking to him a couple of times would lead to “oh by the way I’m ___ i always see you working out at this time.” But i feel like thats pretty unlikely As theres so many people at my gym who ive had several surface level interactions like that with and never did we introduce ourselves to each other.

does anyone have a similar experience where they succeeded/failed? id love to hear them so i can get a better sense of reality

I’ve been a pad/tampon user my whole life. about 4 cycles ago i swapped to a diva disc. i thought it was great my first use and slowly it got worse and worse. i was leaking like crazy and staining all my clothes. I’m like 99% sure ive put it in correctly so maybe it just doesn’t fit me very well?

i unfortunately really love the idea of not using disposable products so i dont want to switch back to pads and tampons, so im wondering if i should try a menstrual cup instead of a disc, or if theres a different disc i should try.

the reason i chose the diva disc is because it seemed like a lot of people who have tried a cup and disc preferred the disc. idk what to do and i just started my period today and i dont want to go through another horrible period with my disc

f22, he’s m25-35 lol.

i was sick for the last week and couldn’t go to the gym (therefore did not see my gym crush). i saw him coming back today even though i completely didn’t expect to.

he usually works out in sweats so even though i know he’s strong ive never really seen his muscles or anything like that. He took his sweatshirt off mid workout today and his arms are HUGE😭

hes so fine ugh. I should’ve talked to him today but another day of being too scared

both f22

Every year for the past few years my friend has a birthday dinner. She invites all her friends and we just talk and eat. She obviously cares about it a lot because she arranges it and reminds us about it like every week until the actual day. every year she invited all of her friends but she had a falling out with basically all of them (in her defense, they were pretty toxic) so this year she only invited me and her bf.

now ive been having some problems with this friend that I’ve been keeping to myself and she is unaware of them but i feel its only a matter of time before i lose it and i cant bring myself to feel remotely excited for this dinner.

the last several times we’ve hung Out, she didn’t disclose with me that she didn’t have enough money to pay for the coffee/meal we were getting until we were basically paying so i had to cover hers. While she is grateful that i pay for her, she never offers to pay me back or to cover the next one.

on top of that, she forgot my birthday the last 2 years in a row. 2 years ago when she forgot, she gave me my birthday present like a month later when she finally remembered and last year she texted me a week after my birthday saying her BOYFRIEND reminded her it was my birthday and she had no money to buy me a present. She said when she gets paid she’d take me out and then she never texted me again about it.

honestly im not someone who makes a big deal out of birthdays and presents as ive never grown up with a big group of close friends, but it bothers me that she makes such a big deal of her own birthday, I’m expected to buy her a present, and she can’t even remember mine.

i want to tell her that i wont be attending her birthday dinner but i feel like a horrible friend. if i dont show up then that means no one will be there (besides her bf) and i do care about her enough to not let that happen. on the other hand i feel used and shes honestly drained my pocket so much i dont have it in me to buy her a present. recently when i see her, it feels against my will and i can barely put any energy into our conversations, i couldn’t imagine even feeling happy for her at her birthday dinner.

what should i do

i posted another post about this older guy at my gym who I’m down bad for, on my account (my only other post) if you wanna check it out for further details

I’ve become pretty comfortable at my gym sincei go very consistently and theres many regulars there who i recognize and share friendly conversations with and i have no problem going up to people if i need to, to ask how many sets they have left or anything else like that. i thought if i hyped myself up enough it would be the same with him, especially after everyone told me theres no way in hell he’s approaching me because of the age gap. But that is not the case, i couldn’t muster the courage to even look at him today.

idk if i just got in my head or what but i was going to try smiling at him or breaking the ice FINALLY after months of zero interaction, but every time we made eye contact i looked away immediately and turned away so he wouldn’t want to approach. We were working out beside each other, almost shoulder to Shoulder, for like 45 minutes today. it wouldve been the perfect time to approach him but i pussied out :/

i dont think i have it in me to talk to him anymore 🙃 i see him so occasionally that i just cant feel comfortable going up to him. I know it’s just a mental barrier and we’d probably both be happy if i did just approach. I dont even know what im scared of, because im almost certain he’s into me. I wish he would just talk to me but definitely not after my weird avoidance towards him today😭

i made a post on r/bodylanguage that yall can check out on my page if youd like more detail. It’s my only post. I’m pretty confident that he’s into me but he’s older so I’m not sure he’s ever going to talk to me.

when i made that post i told myself the next time i saw him i’d smile at him or wave or go up to him and talk to him, either about a workout or “i see you here all the time” and it seemed so easy at the time but then i went on to not seeing him around for 2 weeks and all my confidence slipped.

i talk to so many people at the gym and it doesn’t faze me at all. I don get nervous to talk to any of the other gym regulars at my gym except him. And i had SO MANY opportunities to talk to him today.

we got to the gym at the same time. Checked in at the same time. Went to go stretch at the same time. Weight lifted right next to each other for like 45 minutes and i mean RIGHT NEXT to each other. We made eye contact so many times and i just couldn’t talk to him or smile or do anything remotely polite. Tbf there were a couple times where he’d almost approach me, so i did think he was going to come up and talk to me, but he didn’t. probably because i just immediately looked away as soon as i saw him get close.

i could barely even look at him because i was just too embarrassed that he would catch me doing It??? I feel really stupid. I dont see him often enough to take my chances with “I’ll just do it next time“ i see him once or twice every one or two weeks so im pretty disappointed in myself. I probably wont even see him for the rest of this week and now i just gotta live with the fact that i was too scared to talk to him🙃🙃