I don’t even know where to start..im just exhausted & mentally drained and i need to vent & get any advice i can. Please read everything if you have the time🙏.For a bit of context me ‘f18’ & my boyfriend ‘m25’ have been together for 7 months & he’s became very emotionally abusive, over the smallest of things at that. We started dating in October & the abuse didn’t really start until February but he’s said so many cruel things so frequently that i sometimes feel like im making a mistake by being with someone like him. I stay with him because i love him & unfortunately i love unconditionally, so much to the point of disrespecting my self worth just to stay with a person that makes me feel like shit all because i love them. I wrote this post today because it hasn’t even been a full 4 days & he’s started again. Long story short we were on the phone playing and laughing & he jokingly makes a remark telling me that i need to “learn how to fuck more & nag less“, keep in mind i have somewhat thick skin and we tend to joke a little rough, anyways i replied “you need to learn how to be nicer to me” ( after months of verbal & emotional abuse ) & it’s like his mood did a complete 180 & proved my point. It started with him calling me a bitch telling me to stfu & that i always bring bad energy & bring up bullshit..the fact that he had this reaction stunned me because although my joke had truth to it i wasn’t sad or bitching when i said it, there was no malice or bad intent behind my words. He then goes on to repeatedly yell at me to stfu calling me a bitch & hangs up because i told him i was confused as to why he got so mad & because i started crying because of how he was talking to me, ( i grew up in a toxic family therefore i cry when confronted with yelling or verbal abuse ). Anyways shortly after that I text him letting him know that if he’s going to act this way let me know and ill leave him alone for the day, he tells me i started it & im the reason we can’t have “ a full day of no arguments “, basically being a narcissistic pos playing victim, & yes i have plenty of receipts. When he’s the nice version of himself he’s the best boyfriend ever, we talk 24/7 about anything and everything, we’re always joking and laughing, things are just great overall, however when he gets mad his personality changes completely, he becomes so cruel & narcissist & manipulative, i see the manipulation & narcissism clear as day yet i always fall for it because i love him, but he always denies it claiming he “doesn’t care to manipulate me”. We’ve had an exhausting amount of talks about the way he treats me & he acknowledges that it’s wrong yet he won’t stop..and at first i genuinely believed it was my fault, i talked less, no longer spoke on things i had issues with, walked on eggshells & learned to except being unheard/unseen, became this submissive almost ass kissing girl just so he wouldn’t get mad, im so fucking tired of it. I love him so much but this relationship has made me so fucking depressed, I don’t talk to any friends or family about it because i don’t believe in involving others in your relationship because that can cause problems but im at the point where i just want someone to hear me & give me some sort of advice, that’s why im deciding to anonymously write this post. & for extra context we’ve talked about marriage & kids since we first got together & he wanted that much quicker than me and i agreed because you sacrifice some things when you love someone, but now the thought of being married or pregnant by a man like him makes me so fucking anxious & sad. But when he’s the nice version of himself he’s everything I look for in a partner/future husband. I feel so confused. Ik i love him but idk if i want this relationship the way i once did. Idc where you come from, age religion race etc, im begging for advice, if not that then someone to talk to that maybe experienced the same things. Please.
u/Acrobatic_Match_8923
I don’t even know where to start..im just exhausted & mentally drained and i need to vent & get any advice i can. Please read everything if you have the time🙏.For a bit of context me ‘f18’ & my boyfriend ‘m25’ have been together for 7 months & he’s became very emotionally abusive, over the smallest of things at that. We started dating in October & the abuse didn’t really start until February but he’s said so many cruel things so frequently that i sometimes feel like im making a mistake by being with someone like him. I stay with him because i love him & unfortunately i love unconditionally, so much to the point of disrespecting my self worth just to stay with a person that makes me feel like shit all because i love them. I wrote this post today because it hasn’t even been a full 4 days & he’s started again. Long story short we were on the phone playing and laughing & he jokingly makes a remark telling me that i need to “learn how to fuck more & nag less“, keep in mind i have somewhat thick skin and we tend to joke a little rough, anyways i replied “you need to learn how to be nicer to me” ( after months of verbal & emotional abuse ) & it’s like his mood did a complete 180 & proved my point. It started with him calling me a bitch telling me to stfu & that i always bring bad energy & bring up bullshit..the fact that he had this reaction stunned me because although my joke had truth to it i wasn’t sad or bitching when i said it, there was no malice or bad intent behind my words. He then goes on to repeatedly yell at me to stfu calling me a bitch & hangs up because i told him i was confused as to why he got so mad & because i started crying because of how he was talking to me, ( i grew up in a toxic family therefore i cry when confronted with yelling or verbal abuse ). Anyways shortly after that I text him letting him know that if he’s going to act this way let me know and ill leave him alone for the day, he tells me i started it & im the reason we can’t have “ a full day of no arguments “, basically being a narcissistic pos playing victim, & yes i have plenty of receipts. When he’s the nice version of himself he’s the best boyfriend ever, we talk 24/7 about anything and everything, we’re always joking and laughing, things are just great overall, however when he gets mad his personality changes completely, he becomes so cruel & narcissist & manipulative, i see the manipulation & narcissism clear as day yet i always fall for it because i love him, but he always denies it claiming he “doesn’t care to manipulate me”. We’ve had an exhausting amount of talks about the way he treats me & he acknowledges that it’s wrong yet he won’t stop..and at first i genuinely believed it was my fault, i talked less, no longer spoke on things i had issues with, walked on eggshells & learned to except being unheard/unseen, became this submissive almost ass kissing girl just so he wouldn’t get mad, im so fucking tired of it. I love him so much but this relationship has made me so fucking depressed, I don’t talk to any friends or family about it because i don’t believe in involving others in your relationship because that can cause problems but im at the point where i just want someone to hear me & give me some sort of advice, that’s why im deciding to anonymously write this post. & for extra context we’ve talked about marriage & kids since we first got together & he wanted that much quicker than me and i agreed because you sacrifice some things when you love someone, but now the thought of being married or pregnant by a man like him makes me so fucking anxious & sad. But when he’s the nice version of himself he’s everything I look for in a partner/future husband. I feel so confused. Ik i love him but idk if i want this relationship the way i once did. Idc where you come from, age religion race etc, im begging for advice, if not that then someone to talk to that maybe experienced the same things. Please.
I don’t even know where to start..im just exhausted & mentally drained and i need to vent & get any advice i can. Please read everything if you have the time🙏.For a bit of context me ‘f18’ & my boyfriend ‘m25’ have been together for 7 months & he’s became very emotionally abusive, over the smallest of things at that. We started dating in October & the abuse didn’t really start until February but he’s said so many cruel things so frequently that i sometimes feel like im making a mistake by being with someone like him. I stay with him because i love him & unfortunately i love unconditionally, so much to the point of disrespecting my self worth just to stay with a person that makes me feel like shit all because i love them. I wrote this post today because it hasn’t even been a full 4 days & he’s started again. Long story short we were on the phone playing and laughing & he jokingly makes a remark telling me that i need to “learn how to fuck more & nag less“, keep in mind i have somewhat thick skin and we tend to joke a little rough, anyways i replied “you need to learn how to be nicer to me” ( after months of verbal & emotional abuse ) & it’s like his mood did a complete 180 & proved my point. It started with him calling me a bitch telling me to stfu & that i always bring bad energy & bring up bullshit..the fact that he had this reaction stunned me because although my joke had truth to it i wasn’t sad or bitching when i said it, there was no malice or bad intent behind my words. He then goes on to repeatedly yell at me to stfu calling me a bitch & hangs up because i told him i was confused as to why he got so mad & because i started crying because of how he was talking to me, ( i grew up in a toxic family therefore i cry when confronted with yelling or verbal abuse ). Anyways shortly after that I text him letting him know that if he’s going to act this way let me know and ill leave him alone for the day, he tells me i started it & im the reason we can’t have “ a full day of no arguments “, basically being a narcissistic pos playing victim, & yes i have plenty of receipts. When he’s the nice version of himself he’s the best boyfriend ever, we talk 24/7 about anything and everything, we’re always joking and laughing, things are just great overall, however when he gets mad his personality changes completely, he becomes so cruel & narcissist & manipulative, i see the manipulation & narcissism clear as day yet i always fall for it because i love him, but he always denies it claiming he “doesn’t care to manipulate me”. We’ve had an exhausting amount of talks about the way he treats me & he acknowledges that it’s wrong yet he won’t stop..and at first i genuinely believed it was my fault, i talked less, no longer spoke on things i had issues with, walked on eggshells & learned to except being unheard/unseen, became this submissive almost ass kissing girl just so he wouldn’t get mad, im so fucking tired of it. I love him so much but this relationship has made me so fucking depressed, I don’t talk to any friends or family about it because i don’t believe in involving others in your relationship because that can cause problems but im at the point where i just want someone to hear me & give me some sort of advice, that’s why im deciding to anonymously write this post. & for extra context we’ve talked about marriage & kids since we first got together & he wanted that much quicker than me and i agreed because you sacrifice some things when you love someone, but now the thought of being married or pregnant by a man like him makes me so fucking anxious & sad. But when he’s the nice version of himself he’s everything I look for in a partner/future husband. I feel so confused. Ik i love him but idk if i want this relationship the way i once did. Idc where you come from, age religion race etc, im begging for advice, if not that then someone to talk to that maybe experienced the same things. Please.
I don’t even know where to start..im just exhausted & mentally drained and i need to vent & get any advice i can. Please read everything if you have the time🙏.For a bit of context me ‘f18’ & my boyfriend ‘m25’ have been together for 7 months & he’s became very emotionally abusive, over the smallest of things at that. We started dating in October & the abuse didn’t really start until February but he’s said so many cruel things so frequently that i sometimes feel like im making a mistake by being with someone like him. I stay with him because i love him & unfortunately i love unconditionally, so much to the point of disrespecting my self worth just to stay with a person that makes me feel like shit all because i love them. I wrote this post today because it hasn’t even been a full 4 days & he’s started again. Long story short we were on the phone playing and laughing & he jokingly makes a remark telling me that i need to “learn how to fuck more & nag less“, keep in mind i have somewhat thick skin and we tend to joke a little rough, anyways i replied “you need to learn how to be nicer to me” ( after months of verbal & emotional abuse ) & it’s like his mood did a complete 180 & proved my point. It started with him calling me a bitch telling me to stfu & that i always bring bad energy & bring up bullshit..the fact that he had this reaction stunned me because although my joke had truth to it i wasn’t sad or bitching when i said it, there was no malice or bad intent behind my words. He then goes on to repeatedly yell at me to stfu calling me a bitch & hangs up because i told him i was confused as to why he got so mad & because i started crying because of how he was talking to me, ( i grew up in a toxic family therefore i cry when confronted with yelling or verbal abuse ). Anyways shortly after that I text him letting him know that if he’s going to act this way let me know and ill leave him alone for the day, he tells me i started it & im the reason we can’t have “ a full day of no arguments “, basically being a narcissistic pos playing victim, & yes i have plenty of receipts. When he’s the nice version of himself he’s the best boyfriend ever, we talk 24/7 about anything and everything, we’re always joking and laughing, things are just great overall, however when he gets mad his personality changes completely, he becomes so cruel & narcissist & manipulative, i see the manipulation & narcissism clear as day yet i always fall for it because i love him, but he always denies it claiming he “doesn’t care to manipulate me”. We’ve had an exhausting amount of talks about the way he treats me & he acknowledges that it’s wrong yet he won’t stop..and at first i genuinely believed it was my fault, i talked less, no longer spoke on things i had issues with, walked on eggshells & learned to except being unheard/unseen, became this submissive almost ass kissing girl just so he wouldn’t get mad, im so fucking tired of it. I love him so much but this relationship has made me so fucking depressed, I don’t talk to any friends or family about it because i don’t believe in involving others in your relationship because that can cause problems but im at the point where i just want someone to hear me & give me some sort of advice, that’s why im deciding to anonymously write this post. & for extra context we’ve talked about marriage & kids since we first got together & he wanted that much quicker than me and i agreed because you sacrifice some things when you love someone, but now the thought of being married or pregnant by a man like him makes me so fucking anxious & sad. But when he’s the nice version of himself he’s everything I look for in a partner/future husband. I feel so confused. Ik i love him but idk if i want this relationship the way i once did. Idc where you come from, age religion race etc, im begging for advice, if not that then someone to talk to that maybe experienced the same things. Please.
I don’t even know where to start..im just exhausted & mentally drained and i need to vent & get any advice i can. Please read everything if you have the time🙏.For a bit of context me ‘f18’ & my boyfriend ‘m25’ have been together for 7 months & he’s became very emotionally abusive, over the smallest of things at that. We started dating in October & the abuse didn’t really start until February but he’s said so many cruel things so frequently that i sometimes feel like im making a mistake by being with someone like him. I stay with him because i love him & unfortunately i love unconditionally, so much to the point of disrespecting my self worth just to stay with a person that makes me feel like shit all because i love them. I wrote this post today because it hasn’t even been a full 4 days & he’s started again. Long story short we were on the phone playing and laughing & he jokingly makes a remark telling me that i need to “learn how to fuck more & nag less“, keep in mind i have somewhat thick skin and we tend to joke a little rough, anyways i replied “you need to learn how to be nicer to me” ( after months of verbal & emotional abuse ) & it’s like his mood did a complete 180 & proved my point. It started with him calling me a bitch telling me to stfu & that i always bring bad energy & bring up bullshit..the fact that he had this reaction stunned me because although my joke had truth to it i wasn’t sad or bitching when i said it, there was no malice or bad intent behind my words. He then goes on to repeatedly yell at me to stfu calling me a bitch & hangs up because i told him i was confused as to why he got so mad & because i started crying because of how he was talking to me, ( i grew up in a toxic family therefore i cry when confronted with yelling or verbal abuse ). Anyways shortly after that I text him letting him know that if he’s going to act this way let me know and ill leave him alone for the day, he tells me i started it & im the reason we can’t have “ a full day of no arguments “, basically being a narcissistic pos playing victim, & yes i have plenty of receipts. When he’s the nice version of himself he’s the best boyfriend ever, we talk 24/7 about anything and everything, we’re always joking and laughing, things are just great overall, however when he gets mad his personality changes completely, he becomes so cruel & narcissist & manipulative, i see the manipulation & narcissism clear as day yet i always fall for it because i love him, but he always denies it claiming he “doesn’t care to manipulate me”. We’ve had an exhausting amount of talks about the way he treats me & he acknowledges that it’s wrong yet he won’t stop..and at first i genuinely believed it was my fault, i talked less, no longer spoke on things i had issues with, walked on eggshells & learned to except being unheard/unseen, became this submissive almost ass kissing girl just so he wouldn’t get mad, im so fucking tired of it. I love him so much but this relationship has made me so fucking depressed, I don’t talk to any friends or family about it because i don’t believe in involving others in your relationship because that can cause problems but im at the point where i just want someone to hear me & give me some sort of advice, that’s why im deciding to anonymously write this post. & for extra context we’ve talked about marriage & kids since we first got together & he wanted that much quicker than me and i agreed because you sacrifice some things when you love someone, but now the thought of being married or pregnant by a man like him makes me so fucking anxious & sad. But when he’s the nice version of himself he’s everything I look for in a partner/future husband. I feel so confused. Ik i love him but idk if i want this relationship the way i once did. Idc where you come from, age religion race etc, im begging for advice, if not that then someone to talk to that maybe experienced the same things. Please.