u/Acrobatic_Match_8923

I don’t even know where to start..im just exhausted & mentally drained and i need to vent & get any advice i can. Please read everything if you have the time🙏.For a bit of context me ‘f18’ & my boyfriend ‘m25’ have been together for 7 months & he’s became very emotionally abusive, over the smallest of things at that. We started dating in October & the abuse didn’t really start until February but he’s said so many cruel things so frequently that i sometimes feel like im making a mistake by being with someone like him. I stay with him because i love him & unfortunately i love unconditionally, so much to the point of disrespecting my self worth just to stay with a person that makes me feel like shit all because i love them. I wrote this post today because it hasn’t even been a full 4 days & he’s started again. Long story short we were on the phone playing and laughing & he jokingly makes a remark telling me that i need to “learn how to fuck more & nag less“, keep in mind i have somewhat thick skin and we tend to joke a little rough, anyways i replied “you need to learn how to be nicer to me” ( after months of verbal & emotional abuse ) & it’s like his mood did a complete 180 & proved my point. It started with him calling me a bitch telling me to stfu & that i always bring bad energy & bring up bullshit..the fact that he had this reaction stunned me because although my joke had truth to it i wasn’t sad or bitching when i said it, there was no malice or bad intent behind my words. He then goes on to repeatedly yell at me to stfu calling me a bitch & hangs up because i told him i was confused as to why he got so mad & because i started crying because of how he was talking to me, ( i grew up in a toxic family therefore i cry when confronted with yelling or verbal abuse ). Anyways shortly after that I text him letting him know that if he’s going to act this way let me know and ill leave him alone for the day, he tells me i started it & im the reason we can’t have “ a full day of no arguments “, basically being a narcissistic pos playing victim, & yes i have plenty of receipts. When he’s the nice version of himself he’s the best boyfriend ever, we talk 24/7 about anything and everything, we’re always joking and laughing, things are just great overall, however when he gets mad his personality changes completely, he becomes so cruel & narcissist & manipulative, i see the manipulation & narcissism clear as day yet i always fall for it because i love him, but he always denies it claiming he “doesn’t care to manipulate me”. We’ve had an exhausting amount of talks about the way he treats me & he acknowledges that it’s wrong yet he won’t stop..and at first i genuinely believed it was my fault, i talked less, no longer spoke on things i had issues with, walked on eggshells & learned to except being unheard/unseen, became this submissive almost ass kissing girl just so he wouldn’t get mad, im so fucking tired of it. I love him so much but this relationship has made me so fucking depressed, I don’t talk to any friends or family about it because i don’t believe in involving others in your relationship because that can cause problems but im at the point where i just want someone to hear me & give me some sort of advice, that’s why im deciding to anonymously write this post. & for extra context we’ve talked about marriage & kids since we first got together & he wanted that much quicker than me and i agreed because you sacrifice some things when you love someone, but now the thought of being married or pregnant by a man like him makes me so fucking anxious & sad. But when he’s the nice version of himself he’s everything I look for in a partner/future husband. I feel so confused. Ik i love him but idk if i want this relationship the way i once did. Idc where you come from, age religion race etc, im begging for advice, if not that then someone to talk to that maybe experienced the same things. Please.

reddit.com
u/Acrobatic_Match_8923 — 16 days ago

I don’t even know where to start..im just exhausted & mentally drained and i need to vent & get any advice i can. Please read everything if you have the time🙏.For a bit of context me ‘f18’ & my boyfriend ‘m25’ have been together for 7 months & he’s became very emotionally abusive, over the smallest of things at that. We started dating in October & the abuse didn’t really start until February but he’s said so many cruel things so frequently that i sometimes feel like im making a mistake by being with someone like him. I stay with him because i love him & unfortunately i love unconditionally, so much to the point of disrespecting my self worth just to stay with a person that makes me feel like shit all because i love them. I wrote this post today because it hasn’t even been a full 4 days & he’s started again. Long story short we were on the phone playing and laughing & he jokingly makes a remark telling me that i need to “learn how to fuck more & nag less“, keep in mind i have somewhat thick skin and we tend to joke a little rough, anyways i replied “you need to learn how to be nicer to me” ( after months of verbal & emotional abuse ) & it’s like his mood did a complete 180 & proved my point. It started with him calling me a bitch telling me to stfu & that i always bring bad energy & bring up bullshit..the fact that he had this reaction stunned me because although my joke had truth to it i wasn’t sad or bitching when i said it, there was no malice or bad intent behind my words. He then goes on to repeatedly yell at me to stfu calling me a bitch & hangs up because i told him i was confused as to why he got so mad & because i started crying because of how he was talking to me, ( i grew up in a toxic family therefore i cry when confronted with yelling or verbal abuse ). Anyways shortly after that I text him letting him know that if he’s going to act this way let me know and ill leave him alone for the day, he tells me i started it & im the reason we can’t have “ a full day of no arguments “, basically being a narcissistic pos playing victim, & yes i have plenty of receipts. When he’s the nice version of himself he’s the best boyfriend ever, we talk 24/7 about anything and everything, we’re always joking and laughing, things are just great overall, however when he gets mad his personality changes completely, he becomes so cruel & narcissist & manipulative, i see the manipulation & narcissism clear as day yet i always fall for it because i love him, but he always denies it claiming he “doesn’t care to manipulate me”. We’ve had an exhausting amount of talks about the way he treats me & he acknowledges that it’s wrong yet he won’t stop..and at first i genuinely believed it was my fault, i talked less, no longer spoke on things i had issues with, walked on eggshells & learned to except being unheard/unseen, became this submissive almost ass kissing girl just so he wouldn’t get mad, im so fucking tired of it. I love him so much but this relationship has made me so fucking depressed, I don’t talk to any friends or family about it because i don’t believe in involving others in your relationship because that can cause problems but im at the point where i just want someone to hear me & give me some sort of advice, that’s why im deciding to anonymously write this post. & for extra context we’ve talked about marriage & kids since we first got together & he wanted that much quicker than me and i agreed because you sacrifice some things when you love someone, but now the thought of being married or pregnant by a man like him makes me so fucking anxious & sad. But when he’s the nice version of himself he’s everything I look for in a partner/future husband. I feel so confused. Ik i love him but idk if i want this relationship the way i once did. Idc where you come from, age religion race etc, im begging for advice, if not that then someone to talk to that maybe experienced the same things. Please.

reddit.com
u/Acrobatic_Match_8923 — 16 days ago

I don’t even know where to start..im just exhausted & mentally drained and i need to vent & get any advice i can. Please read everything if you have the time🙏.For a bit of context me ‘f18’ & my boyfriend ‘m25’ have been together for 7 months & he’s became very emotionally abusive, over the smallest of things at that. We started dating in October & the abuse didn’t really start until February but he’s said so many cruel things so frequently that i sometimes feel like im making a mistake by being with someone like him. I stay with him because i love him & unfortunately i love unconditionally, so much to the point of disrespecting my self worth just to stay with a person that makes me feel like shit all because i love them. I wrote this post today because it hasn’t even been a full 4 days & he’s started again. Long story short we were on the phone playing and laughing & he jokingly makes a remark telling me that i need to “learn how to fuck more & nag less“, keep in mind i have somewhat thick skin and we tend to joke a little rough, anyways i replied “you need to learn how to be nicer to me” ( after months of verbal & emotional abuse ) & it’s like his mood did a complete 180 & proved my point. It started with him calling me a bitch telling me to stfu & that i always bring bad energy & bring up bullshit..the fact that he had this reaction stunned me because although my joke had truth to it i wasn’t sad or bitching when i said it, there was no malice or bad intent behind my words. He then goes on to repeatedly yell at me to stfu calling me a bitch & hangs up because i told him i was confused as to why he got so mad & because i started crying because of how he was talking to me, ( i grew up in a toxic family therefore i cry when confronted with yelling or verbal abuse ). Anyways shortly after that I text him letting him know that if he’s going to act this way let me know and ill leave him alone for the day, he tells me i started it & im the reason we can’t have “ a full day of no arguments “, basically being a narcissistic pos playing victim, & yes i have plenty of receipts. When he’s the nice version of himself he’s the best boyfriend ever, we talk 24/7 about anything and everything, we’re always joking and laughing, things are just great overall, however when he gets mad his personality changes completely, he becomes so cruel & narcissist & manipulative, i see the manipulation & narcissism clear as day yet i always fall for it because i love him, but he always denies it claiming he “doesn’t care to manipulate me”. We’ve had an exhausting amount of talks about the way he treats me & he acknowledges that it’s wrong yet he won’t stop..and at first i genuinely believed it was my fault, i talked less, no longer spoke on things i had issues with, walked on eggshells & learned to except being unheard/unseen, became this submissive almost ass kissing girl just so he wouldn’t get mad, im so fucking tired of it. I love him so much but this relationship has made me so fucking depressed, I don’t talk to any friends or family about it because i don’t believe in involving others in your relationship because that can cause problems but im at the point where i just want someone to hear me & give me some sort of advice, that’s why im deciding to anonymously write this post. & for extra context we’ve talked about marriage & kids since we first got together & he wanted that much quicker than me and i agreed because you sacrifice some things when you love someone, but now the thought of being married or pregnant by a man like him makes me so fucking anxious & sad. But when he’s the nice version of himself he’s everything I look for in a partner/future husband. I feel so confused. Ik i love him but idk if i want this relationship the way i once did. Idc where you come from, age religion race etc, im begging for advice, if not that then someone to talk to that maybe experienced the same things. Please.

reddit.com
u/Acrobatic_Match_8923 — 16 days ago

I don’t even know where to start..im just exhausted & mentally drained and i need to vent & get any advice i can. Please read everything if you have the time🙏.For a bit of context me ‘f18’ & my boyfriend ‘m25’ have been together for 7 months & he’s became very emotionally abusive, over the smallest of things at that. We started dating in October & the abuse didn’t really start until February but he’s said so many cruel things so frequently that i sometimes feel like im making a mistake by being with someone like him. I stay with him because i love him & unfortunately i love unconditionally, so much to the point of disrespecting my self worth just to stay with a person that makes me feel like shit all because i love them. I wrote this post today because it hasn’t even been a full 4 days & he’s started again. Long story short we were on the phone playing and laughing & he jokingly makes a remark telling me that i need to “learn how to fuck more & nag less“, keep in mind i have somewhat thick skin and we tend to joke a little rough, anyways i replied “you need to learn how to be nicer to me” ( after months of verbal & emotional abuse ) & it’s like his mood did a complete 180 & proved my point. It started with him calling me a bitch telling me to stfu & that i always bring bad energy & bring up bullshit..the fact that he had this reaction stunned me because although my joke had truth to it i wasn’t sad or bitching when i said it, there was no malice or bad intent behind my words. He then goes on to repeatedly yell at me to stfu calling me a bitch & hangs up because i told him i was confused as to why he got so mad & because i started crying because of how he was talking to me, ( i grew up in a toxic family therefore i cry when confronted with yelling or verbal abuse ). Anyways shortly after that I text him letting him know that if he’s going to act this way let me know and ill leave him alone for the day, he tells me i started it & im the reason we can’t have “ a full day of no arguments “, basically being a narcissistic pos playing victim, & yes i have plenty of receipts. When he’s the nice version of himself he’s the best boyfriend ever, we talk 24/7 about anything and everything, we’re always joking and laughing, things are just great overall, however when he gets mad his personality changes completely, he becomes so cruel & narcissist & manipulative, i see the manipulation & narcissism clear as day yet i always fall for it because i love him, but he always denies it claiming he “doesn’t care to manipulate me”. We’ve had an exhausting amount of talks about the way he treats me & he acknowledges that it’s wrong yet he won’t stop..and at first i genuinely believed it was my fault, i talked less, no longer spoke on things i had issues with, walked on eggshells & learned to except being unheard/unseen, became this submissive almost ass kissing girl just so he wouldn’t get mad, im so fucking tired of it. I love him so much but this relationship has made me so fucking depressed, I don’t talk to any friends or family about it because i don’t believe in involving others in your relationship because that can cause problems but im at the point where i just want someone to hear me & give me some sort of advice, that’s why im deciding to anonymously write this post. & for extra context we’ve talked about marriage & kids since we first got together & he wanted that much quicker than me and i agreed because you sacrifice some things when you love someone, but now the thought of being married or pregnant by a man like him makes me so fucking anxious & sad. But when he’s the nice version of himself he’s everything I look for in a partner/future husband. I feel so confused. Ik i love him but idk if i want this relationship the way i once did. Idc where you come from, age religion race etc, im begging for advice, if not that then someone to talk to that maybe experienced the same things. Please.

reddit.com
u/Acrobatic_Match_8923 — 16 days ago

I don’t even know where to start..im just exhausted & mentally drained and i need to vent & get any advice i can. Please read everything if you have the time🙏.For a bit of context me ‘f18’ & my boyfriend ‘m25’ have been together for 7 months & he’s became very emotionally abusive, over the smallest of things at that. We started dating in October & the abuse didn’t really start until February but he’s said so many cruel things so frequently that i sometimes feel like im making a mistake by being with someone like him. I stay with him because i love him & unfortunately i love unconditionally, so much to the point of disrespecting my self worth just to stay with a person that makes me feel like shit all because i love them. I wrote this post today because it hasn’t even been a full 4 days & he’s started again. Long story short we were on the phone playing and laughing & he jokingly makes a remark telling me that i need to “learn how to fuck more & nag less“, keep in mind i have somewhat thick skin and we tend to joke a little rough, anyways i replied “you need to learn how to be nicer to me” ( after months of verbal & emotional abuse ) & it’s like his mood did a complete 180 & proved my point. It started with him calling me a bitch telling me to stfu & that i always bring bad energy & bring up bullshit..the fact that he had this reaction stunned me because although my joke had truth to it i wasn’t sad or bitching when i said it, there was no malice or bad intent behind my words. He then goes on to repeatedly yell at me to stfu calling me a bitch & hangs up because i told him i was confused as to why he got so mad & because i started crying because of how he was talking to me, ( i grew up in a toxic family therefore i cry when confronted with yelling or verbal abuse ). Anyways shortly after that I text him letting him know that if he’s going to act this way let me know and ill leave him alone for the day, he tells me i started it & im the reason we can’t have “ a full day of no arguments “, basically being a narcissistic pos playing victim, & yes i have plenty of receipts. When he’s the nice version of himself he’s the best boyfriend ever, we talk 24/7 about anything and everything, we’re always joking and laughing, things are just great overall, however when he gets mad his personality changes completely, he becomes so cruel & narcissist & manipulative, i see the manipulation & narcissism clear as day yet i always fall for it because i love him, but he always denies it claiming he “doesn’t care to manipulate me”. We’ve had an exhausting amount of talks about the way he treats me & he acknowledges that it’s wrong yet he won’t stop..and at first i genuinely believed it was my fault, i talked less, no longer spoke on things i had issues with, walked on eggshells & learned to except being unheard/unseen, became this submissive almost ass kissing girl just so he wouldn’t get mad, im so fucking tired of it. I love him so much but this relationship has made me so fucking depressed, I don’t talk to any friends or family about it because i don’t believe in involving others in your relationship because that can cause problems but im at the point where i just want someone to hear me & give me some sort of advice, that’s why im deciding to anonymously write this post. & for extra context we’ve talked about marriage & kids since we first got together & he wanted that much quicker than me and i agreed because you sacrifice some things when you love someone, but now the thought of being married or pregnant by a man like him makes me so fucking anxious & sad. But when he’s the nice version of himself he’s everything I look for in a partner/future husband. I feel so confused. Ik i love him but idk if i want this relationship the way i once did. Idc where you come from, age religion race etc, im begging for advice, if not that then someone to talk to that maybe experienced the same things. Please.

reddit.com
u/Acrobatic_Match_8923 — 16 days ago