post is from @/celestetrianon on instagram, a prominent treal trans activist. there has been no other reporting on this that i can find, please share any sources youre aware of
It took a long time to come to terms with being trans and not every single moment thinking “am I being feminine enough.” Always makeup, always done to the nines.
One day I realized being trans has nothing to do with how I look or am I stealth. I mean ya who wouldn’t want to look like Bosco✨, but it’s not going to be a reality for many of us, and it’s no reason to think you can’t transition. It’s all about accepting who you are. You have to do that for you, never mind everyone else accepting you, do you accept you, all of you just as you are staring at yourself in the mirror after your shower? Do you accept her for who she is, or are you picking her apart and hiding because you don’t look the part in your head?
I know. I was there too. I almost gave up a couple times.
The changes happen, slowly. The money may come for surgeries or it may not. I know that is a dream for me for FFS and breast aug, but it may never happen or it will. Regardless I am more than enough just as I am right here, right now.
You have to love yourself first💋
just what title says. getting mixed info.
Tl~dr - why are "elder" (45+) trans people talking about "completeness" of transition as the be-all-and-end-all of transition more than our younger trans siblings? (Please read the whole post for full context, though 🥰)
For context, the first photo was my first peek into the world under the guise of "dressing in drag for Halloween". It was one night just after turning 34 and I put her back in the closet for another 11 years but notice how happy I look! 2-6 are from a timeline post I made this year for TDoV and the last is unfiltered, no makeup, sweaty and at the gym pic.
A theme I often find in posts and comments in the TransLater Sub, especially from people 45+, is the idea of "completeness" of transition. I also subscribed (past tense) to this mindset, earlier on in my journey, that transition is a set of goals and that if I didn't complete all the goals, I wasn't "woman enough" or "trans enough" but I've realized, for myself at least, that transition isn't a destination, it's a journey. I recognize that even that first peek of my womanhood into the world at 34 was a step in my transition.
Habitual survival instincts forced me back into the closet for 11 years but I was always there, waiting; complete in myself but unexplored. Yes, I included some extremely clocky pics and that was on purpose. In those moments and times, I felt just as much me as I do now, only with more insecurities. I still feel clocky and gross sometimes. I'm still self-conscious of whatever small bulge there is showing in my pelvic area. I had an orchi done about two months before the 5th pic in '24. That was one more step towards my aesthetic transition and a huge step in my medical transition. It meant that there's no "going back". No escape plan
Here's the deal, though; I've accepted that at each stage and in every physical change in my transition, it is complete. That doesn't mean there aren't future transition stages coming, it just means that I accept where I'm at now, physically, and look forward to where my future transition will take me. Am I fine with surgeries? Most likely not. I'm actively planning to have a vaginoplasty but I want it on my terms with the aesthetic and functionality that I want, not what the system dictates. That likely means I'll be paying out-of-pocket and that will take some time to save up for but until that time, I don't consider my transition incomplete. It's complete, for now.
If you got this far and wish to talk about what complete means for your transition, that's why I made this post.
could’ve posted this anywhere + ik posting this is pointless given how dire the job market is + i’ve been applying literally everywhere for about 2 months now and i’m yet to hear from any of them but i’m currently looking for work ! just as i was about to move out bc that’s the only time i’ll b able to start hrt, i was laid off by my former work. i have a bunch of money saved up but it’s not enough bc i need to pay a bunch of my bills + my mom’s bills off . also i need to pay for therapy just so i could get my shit together. if anyone of u guys know someone around ottawa who’s looking for an employee who can do both part time nd full time work, then please dm me !!!!! i can send my resume if need be. it feels humiliating having to post this but i need to transition nd i cant do that if i dont have money .
Hi! My friend and I are travelling to Montréal for their top surgery appointment soon. Was there a security deposit amount for the hotel, and if so, how much?
Thank you!
can I use my retired physicians letter for my sex change request? or do I have to get a new one written my my replacement physician?
I have really bad bottom dysphoria and there’s nothing I can do about it because I’m so mentally ill I can’t even string together six months of stability. The longest I’ve been stable was 11 months. I did everything right, I got on HRT young, I waited the year on hormone therapy. Just to be told I can’t get it because I’m not stable enough, and with waiting for funding and waiting for the hospital to actually do the surgery I’d have to remain “stable” for at least like 5 years and that just seems impossible when i have a personality disorder and a severe mood disorder. My bottom dysphoria is so bad I hear about other people in other countries getting it and I want to be happy for them but i honestly feel so jealous. I’m at the point where I’ve almost given up on ever having it. Yes, I know it’ll cause a dip in my mental health once I get it, but living like this forever will also cause my mental health to decline but nobody recognizes that.
I’m still looking at probably a few months still on the waitlist (I’ve been on it about a year now), but I’d like to be prepared for when the time comes.
Because I have auditory processing issues and can freeze up in medical appointments, so the more I know going in, the better (especially in settings where they do it a lot so it’s kind of routine and quick for them).
I’m not worried about what, if any, physical exam stuff is going to happen, just about what they’ll talk about - especially what they’ll ask me.
So, if you had an intake at Gracemed recently, I’d love to hear what it entailed when it comes to any information I’ll need to give and/or decisions I’ll have to make.
In particular:
-Will they want specifics about what I want for my ideal end result, or do they just sort of tell you what’s possible based on your body?
-would it help for me to know about the different types of techniques and options beforehand?
-Will I have to make any decisions regarding surgery stuff at that first appointment?
TIA
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Im a trans girl Finishing my first semester of college which has been really hard for me. have been working on a group assignment with a student in my class for the past week. The students behavior is extremely unstable and I suspect bipolar so after noticing strange things I stayed away.They already have lashed out randomly at other students who they felt were being too noisy and nothing has been done about her behavior. I had to work on a group assignment with her and I already felt apprehensive but wanted to get it out of the way. When I was on my way to class I texted the group that I would be late and she proceeded to antagonize me about it in the WhatsApp group anatognizing me like I was her kid. I showed up 15mins before our presentation so there was plenty of time. Right before we presented the assignment, the student strategically started getting confrontational with me. I tried to avoid them but the more I did the more they became enraged and just screamed out that im a backstabbing b#tch infront of the whole class. I felt completely humiliated as everyone gasped then laughed. The teacher said our presentation was cancelled then later on told us we need to prove what we worked on for the assignment because this girl is claiming I did absolutely nothing on it. (Which isn't true and I had evidence to show that) It doesn't seem like anything was done to penalize this student for treating me this way and it doesn't seem fair. If this were highschool she would have needed to at least go to the principles office. Its like she consistently has used her white cud privilege to get away with murder. This just happened yesterday,I would like to get advice on what I could do about this situation in terms of making sure she is held responsible for what she did to me.
Hi friends! So I have my Monarch file open with GRS Montreal and had my pre-op phone call with them yesterday! I was told that for my surgery that I would need to book two post-op appointments. One to change the dressing, and the second to remove the drains.
Maybe a silly question but am I meant to just call up my family doctor to ask if that is something he'd be comfortable doing? Or...??
I’m a 22 year old trans femme from the USA. I just got back from Canada, and suddenly realized I might want to move there. I’m thinking of applying for International Explore Canada for a year. I do have a supportive brother, who has helped me with asking the hard questions. It’s hard to be sure if I want to do this. I only have an associates from my community college, and don’t know what I want to do with my life. I only have a part time job back home at a grocery store.
For those that immigrated from the U.S. to Canada, what was the whole process like? I’m curious about how hard it is learning about healthcare, laws, getting a driver license, etc. Anything is appreciated.
Hi, I'm Lorelei, I had a vaginoplasty done by Dr Belanger at GRS Montreal about 4 years ago. I had no major complications, but I have some internal hair growth and had some hyper granulation that was treated with silver nitrate. The scar tissue also is very prominent, and there's no clitoral hood at all; aesthetically it's something I think I want to get revised. What are the chances that I could a revision covered by OHIP? Thanks!
hi folks, thought i'd share since i looked at everyone else's timelines constantly while i was waiting and it helped me a lot.
i will edit to update when i have the documents in my hand. this was an name change as well as sex marker change to X. it was like 12-13 weeks between mailing and credit card charge. i can highly recommend turning on credit card charge notifications on your phone if you payed by card, such dopamine!
I dropped off my application on Tues January 13 2026 @ 930am. I received my birth certificate and name change certificate on Thurs. Apr. 16th 2026.
Total weeks=13. I was in shock and disbelief it came so soon because initially they told me 21 to 24 weeks.
ETA I am not trans but I just wanted to give my timeline.
i am not volunteering im just reposting since it's not up here yet :) check out the ottawatranslibrary insta for more info
just wanted to make a celebratory post :)
yesterday I booked my top surgery with dr Hontscharuk for June 19th. im so fucking excited. I feel this sense to live that ive never felt before. like so hungry and excited and grateful for each day.
Hontscharuk and Barbara the patient coordinator are soooo so sweet, Barbara especially. it didn't hit me probs, bc im autistic and take ages to process things, until I got home that night in the shower. couldn't stop crying about how happy I am that I trusted myself and listened to that little boy I once was. (knew I was trans as an extremely young child, then forcibly made myself christian, hyper femme, transphobic, anorexic up until just 2 years ago I finally accepted my childhood truth.)
what a blessing and privilege it is to be able to transition and have it go so well. its so scary but its so WORTH IT. I want to thank my community endlessly.
when I was convincing myself I was cis and I was so transphobic, I would tell myself the trans community is all brainwashed etc and horrible things. but in reality its the most loving, kind, knowledgeable community ever, and I appreciate everyone so much who has helped me. yes being cis would be amazing but I do think I was made a transman for a reason.
im not sure if it is allowed to be posted in this sub but I do need to fundraise thousands for my top surgery and I have a go fund me but idk if Im allowed to link it
thanks for reading <3
I feel like I am trans but I feel a small bit of hesitation with me mistaking it for something else. I‘be been feeling that for a little and I wanna know if that’s a normal thing?
Hey everyone,
I'm looking to sublet to someone for 4-12 months for $600/month plus utilities. It's one of three bedrooms with a shared bathroom, kitchen, and living/dining room.
Why is this here? We're trans, and ideally we'd like to make the housing search for other trans people a little less anxious.
Ideal for students at Carleton University.
For privacy reasons I'd prefer to keep further details to DM, so feel free to reach out if you're interested!