r/Sex_Positivity

Ladies I guess, how does a man with a little dick gain confidence out here in today’s society, we’re dealing with social media, porn, etc. and it’s somewhat becoming our reality. And most importantly you all are becoming more honest about the things you want sexually. So for a man who knows his package is small. And who has heard the “perfect size “ bs just to get cheated on with someone who is bigger, how can a man show his confidence? And yeah yall will say oh it’s other factors that attracts a woman or gets a woman nut off but let’s just be real for once please. Cause most importantly yall want a man that confident in the bedroom right?

Obviously the first thought is "ask my partner." But I'm curious what advice you'd have.

I'm straight (m). My partner is bi (f)
We are in a long term relationship and we are committed to that but I know in the past she has had fantasies about being with a woman again.

Are there sex acts we could do together that would be more feminine that would help her feel grounded in that energy? I don't even know if that's a thing because attraction to a woman isn't about the sex act specifically, but I wonder if there's something she could do with me that might scratch the itch in a way too? (I wondered about pegging or fingering instead of penetration, etc?)

I'm 19m and I have been chatting with a guy on Grindr who is 35 and we are planning to hook up some time soon. He's seen my self harm scars and haven't made any comments on them, which is nice. Though, I'm wondering if it's still ok to hook up with him if I recently relapsed. I haven't told him or anything, I don't want to make him uncomfortable as I don't know him that well. Though, I'm afraid that not telling him beforehand will make it worse. We are as well quite kinky, I'm a masochist, he's a sadist. My masochism is very different to self harm as intents differ though. Thank you in advance, sorry if this isn't much information

Burner cus I feel ashamed talking about this on my main.

My girlfriend and I have sex semi regularly maybe 1-2 times a month. I have a fairly thin penis and use 52mm condoms with no lube. It tends to bunch up a bit and sometimes slip off a cm to where the end slightly dangles. One time I saw a small amount liquid sloshing around the shaft area and got worried if it would spill out and go in.

We are both young (legal) but cannot afford to get pregnant. Abortion is also out of the question as her parents would be able to find out.

Other forms of contraceptives like the pill and implants are also not an option due to personal preferences. Other than just using maybe a tighter condom and timing her period, is there anything else we can do? She has irregular periods so even timing that would be difficult.

If we seriously cannot afford pregnancy, should we just abstain until marriage?

I (28F) ended my previous long-term relationship (5 years) because I realised I wasn't attracted to my partner (35M). We would go long periods of time not having sex. When we did have sex, it was often very difficult. There would be pain and frustration from both of us. Any pressure from him was minimal but there was sometimes talk of blue balls and I felt incredibly guilty.

There were many times when I had sex even though I didn't want to, and would experience a mental battle with myself around stopping, persisting, and listening to/ ignoring my desire to stop. Sometimes there would be a 'compensatory' handjob and masturbating together became a sort of 'solution'.

This experience has massively impacted my sex life now. I've started to date a wonderful man who I am super attracted to, but my past is affecting parts of our sex.

For example, if I come first, I enter a different mindset where I am less aroused, even if I am still comfortable it's very triggering because my brain associates the lowered arousal with wanting to stop. I desperately want to feel excited about my partner's orgasm and to be responsible for it but my brain seems to put up a block. It's as though the male orgasm is a threat or a duty or something I must endure.

We've communicated loads about this (and I'm in therapy) and now just wondering what we can do to gently challenge/overcome this mental block (aside from coming together/him coming first as I don't want to avoid the triggering circumstance of me coming first).

It seems like the healthy position is caring about your partner getting off and being comfortable with putting yourself out slightly if that's what's necessary to achieve it. But as someone with this negative sexual experience, the line between that and participating in sex out of duty is very thin.

I actually comment in r/BDSMAdvice under my normal account, but keep things relatively clean since it is more connected to who I am. I figure this needs to have more discretion. I also am posting here just in case it didn't meet the criteria. 😃

OK so I (44 FTM bedroom submissive) was hit on by a nice pleasure dom (65M) about a month ago on fetlife and we saw each other a few weeks ago. For someone who is usually in service to others, having someone make me their focus was a hell of a change and it took me a while to cope. While I didn't get into subspace, I could see it from where I was. 😄 2 hours of foreplay and had a nice orgasm (my first caused by someone else in like... 14 years) and the aftercare was almost as nice. Would have preferred cuddling but the conversation was nice. 😄

He definitely expressed interest in doing this again though I am probably more interested in him to be honest. Very intelligent and very sweet, not the most conventionally handsome (but *definitely* cute), but the talks we had were incredible (though admittedly some were during playtime and I could think of better things he could be doing with his mouth 😄 ). I don't think he has had a lot of responses to any of his requests on fetlife as he is very into a more unusual kink (it had just gone from my hard limit to being green light for most of it and soft limit for some a few months ago and with him it's all green lights and I really enjoyed it).

He ghosted me briefly in fact but he was saying he had not been feeling well, he has stated I am welcome to see him both professionally and playfully. I am not really sure how true that is, but whatever. I still see him active on fetlife though not at the level he was. We are in the same industry (healthcare) so we have loose connections outside of the bedroom. He also indicated he wants to introduce me to a person who could use my healthcare skills for the collection of clinics he helps do staffing for. (I have a very unique skill set as I am a medical hypnotherapist)

He now ignores most messages on Fetlife, has never acknowledge Signal, Kik or Telegram or his play email... BUT YET I have his *normal* direct cell phone and his work email as of a few days ago which he does acknowledge at least sometimes and I am trying to figure out what is going on here. The messages that I send there are clean of course and professional. And he is actually monitoring some health concerns he found out. As in his play exam, found a real issue. (Minor but need addressing, he is trying to find a colleague who can help with the most issue.)

I actually nearly burned out a Hitachi a few days ago thinking of him... then a few hours later had another orgasm (I am not known for multiples) so clearly he has gotten to me.

I am so confused as to what is going on (I am autistic and often easily confused). Am I being friendzoned? Did he get his sex and now is no longer interested? Is he keeping track of my health and wants to wait until I am better? I am very interested in him and he DEFINITELY knows and has stated he wants to play again but is he being polite since he hasn't set a date even before he confirmed the issue? Am I coming on too strong and am too high energy for him? Is he putting me in the colleague zone. I am really bad at figuring things out.

He also has mentioned several times about an adult store that I should stop by and I want to do that and find something just in case we are able to see each other again.

Some girls salivate more than others, and some have drier mouths. Is it a hydration issue?

This is a throwaway account, obviously. I’m not sure where to post this (I plan on cross posting on many subs lol), but I’m having trouble finding info online. I’ve already made an appointment with a gynecologist, but I’m hoping to maybe get some answers beforehand too.

Long story short, I’ve (f) recently started having intercourse for the first time. It’s gotten to the point where penetration doesnt hurt anymore, but the last time, when he started thrusting really fast/deep, I felt this intense pain in my lower back. It kind of felt like a nerve was being hit over and over. I don’t remember feeling pain anywhere else, and it’s my first time experiencing this pain. Also it didn’t happen in every position, mainly just when he was on top.

Has anyone else ever experienced this? Or does anyone know the cause?

Hello i recently founded my toy stash (seethrough plastic box with lid) And im looking for suggestions what to add there

You can suggest Both toys And maintenance/hygienic stuff

Rn i Have a torso Toy, some lubes,towel,cosmetic wipes,wet wipes (nonperfumed) And im looking for suggestions what more to add

Thanks for your suggestions and have a nice day :)

Hello! I [FtM 18] am having a bit of an issue with my jaw lately and I’m looking for advice on possible solutions.

So, for context I’m an extremely tiny person. I’m 4’11 (149cm) and 107lbs (48.64kg) and my boyfriend/dom is 5’8 and he’s also… well endowed lol.

I have been having this issue recently where my jaw has actually been locking up whenever I’m trying to give him head. It never really used to be an issue with me before but recently my jaw has been crunching and cracking a lot and it’s painful when my jaw locks up and i usually have to push it back into place.

It freaks me out when it happens so I’ve been trying to fix it by just pulling off of him occasionally during head to give my jaw a reset but it’s a bit annoying to constantly do this.

Should I maybe see a doctor about this or is there any form of exercise that I could do or am I forever doomed to be the literal saying of “lock jaw”.

Thank you in advance