r/NewMomStuff

I have an 8-month-old baby and I’ve been seeing reports of measles cases in Manhattan, Long Island, and New Jersey. I’m curious how other moms of babies who are too young to be vaccinated are navigating this. I really want to enjoy the summer with my baby, but I’m starting to feel worried about the risk of it spreading. Any advice would be appreciated.

My baby is 9 months old. I am 38, and I am 4’11”. I gained about 40 pounds total during my pregnancy. I also had a c-section. After I had the baby, the first 20 pounds came off pretty quickly. The last 20 pounds stuck hard. I was never a “gym rat” before, but I would workout 2-3 days a week fairly consistently prior to getting pregnant up to my 3rd trimester.
My husband and I both work full time, and my husband works 12 hour shifts. So my day usually looks like: wake up, pack my lunch, get the baby ready, drop her at daycare, work, pick her up, go home, cook dinner. We usually eat at 8pm unfortunately.
I tried joining a HIIT gym near my house, but I have sciatica and my chiropractor said not to go anymore. There’s also a hot yoga gym that I like, but I can only go on the days my husband is off because they don’t have childcare. I struggle to motivate myself to workout at home with videos. I’m considering trying intermittent fasting again.
Has anyone had success with dropping the baby weight?

I’d like to start by saying I think we brought this upon ourselves. We’ve been sleeping since day one and most of the time he goes straight from breast to bed now I’ve noticed he will not sleep unless a booby is in his mouth and once he is asleep if I don’t, trans exaction him quick enough from breast to bed then he will wake up and need to eat all over again. He’s been getting into phases of 2 to 3 wake periods where he’s up for five hours straight just wanting to eat on my boob the whole time. Today has been rough. We’re on our 10 of him being awake. I know he’s just overtired at this point, but he’s just wide awake and I can’t put him down. I don’t know what to do and I’m exhausted and I’m getting no sleep. Any advice helps.

I feel like I haven’t felt myself in a long time. I have a toddler and am currently expecting again. I feel fat and angry all the time. My body just feels in constant pain. My posture is poor which causes constant pain. I am carrying my toddler etc. I am a SAHM for the time being. I do not have help around. My husband helps when he is home from work but it just doesn’t seem to be enough. Everything piles up- laundry, dishes, constant mess and chaos. We don’t live in a huge space as rent is astronomical in our area.

While my husband does a lot as well, we are both tired. I feel he is making me hate myself and I can’t explain it. We are never on the same page. I feel he has made me feel uncomfortable for things I say and do. I don’t feel like myself anymore. I’m sad tired and my clothes don’t fit. I don’t even think I make sense. Just needed to get it out.

One of my closest friends has been married for two years and I just found out she’s pregnant!!!! I am so happy for her and I already asked her if I can make some things for the baby. It’s going to be a boy 🥹 She the first of my friends to have a kid since my friends are all 16-20 and I’m wondering, what should I make her? I’m good at sewing but not so much knitting. My ideas so far include a baby bonnet (though that seems a bit feminine and she’s kind of traditional) a blanket, or a bib? any other ideas?

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Drop a letter or note ✍️ to your baby in the comments like a promise, a fear, something silly, something true. There's no right way.

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sooo today, take 2 mins and leave a social memory for ur baby

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Anybody seeing this… can you please take just a minute to vote for me in the Super Mom Competition? It supports the Children’s Miracle Network which is a non-profit that significantly helps local Children’s Hospitals! Thank you so much!!

My husband, 30, and I, 29, are expecting our second child this summer. Our son is two years old. I’m planning to have our daughter at home, just like I had planned for our son. However, I had to be transferred to the hospital because I wasn’t progressing and eventually had a C-section.

For childcare during labour, we have two options: our son can be present with a dedicated adult, or we can choose not to have him there. Since I’m estranged from my parents and my husband from his dad, my mother-in-law is the only grandparent involved in my son’s life. They have a good relationship, and she babysits him regularly, so she’s our best (and only) choice to watch him during labour, whether it’s at home with us or if she needs to pick him up.

My mother-in-law was present during my last labour, and while she had good intentions, her presence wasn’t a positive addition. She’s a nurse who struggles with anxiety and wasn’t comfortable in a homebirth or midwife setting. She also made some poor judgment calls, like encouraging my husband to sleep through most of my labour or sending a picture of my son to all our extended family while I was still in the OR, even though we specifically told her we wanted to be the ones to announce the birth.

For all these reasons, I haven’t felt comfortable having her there during labour. I would have loved for my son to be present, but my husband and I agreed that it would be best for her to watch him at her house instead.

Last night, we discussed how we’d like our son and daughter to meet, and I suggested a private moment for the four of us. This would mean my husband would need to pick up our son from his mom’s house and bring him here, while she waits until we’re ready to let her come over. My husband agreed it would be ideal, but he worried it wouldn’t be realistic since his mom would want to visit with our son right after I gave birth and then leave again. He felt it would hurt her feelings if we asked her to stay away, and he wasn’t comfortable asking.

I’m concerned that our son might feel rejected or excluded if he visits us and the new baby in his house and then has to leave again. I also worry that his mom’s over-enthusiasm and difficulty respecting boundaries would make the meeting unpleasant. Overall, I think she’d likely try to lead the moment and not do it the way we want.

My husband and I struggled a lot the year after our son was born. He didn’t support me during pregnancy, labour, and postpartum, which was unexpected and not in line with who he is. It was partly due to high external stress. We’ve worked through some of it, and he’s very remorseful and has been making efforts to make up for what happened. However, I’m still not in a place where I trust him to support me through this labour and postpartum, and his concern for his mom’s feelings over what’s best for our family or me has been difficult to accept.

Am I overreacting because of the trauma of the last birth? Should I let my mother-in-law be present when our children meet or even at the birth?

I need an outside perspective. Please help! 🙏🏼

EDIT: I honestly considered deleting this post because I was a bit shocked by how intensely the home VBAC aspect overshadowed the actual topic I was asking about. But I’m choosing to leave it up because I do think these conversations can still be valuable, even when people strongly disagree.

I mentioned the home VBAC for context because part of why my previous birth/postpartum experience was emotionally difficult was that I planned a home birth and ultimately needed a transfer and C-section.

I’m in Canada, where registered midwives are regulated healthcare professionals integrated into the public healthcare system with hospital privileges, emergency training/equipment, and established transfer protocols. This is not an unassisted birth situation, and my medical and surgical history has obviously been thoroughly reviewed.

For those discussing risks: yes, uterine rupture is the primary concern in a VBAC and it is serious. Current Canadian resources generally cite the risk around 0.5% (roughly 1 in 200) for someone with one prior low transverse incision in labour. VBAC success rates are also generally cited around 60–80%, depending on individual factors and labour circumstances. Induction/augmentation can increase rupture risk, which is one reason careful candidate selection and labour management matter.

People are completely entitled to feel those risks are not personally acceptable. Many would never choose a home VBAC, and I fully respect that. But I also hope some nuance can exist in these discussions. There is a difference between saying “I would never make that choice” and implying that women pursuing regulated, informed VBAC care are automatically reckless, deceptive, or indifferent to their children’s safety.

At the very least, maybe these exchanges will encourage some people to look more deeply into how VBAC care is actually handled in different healthcare systems, or help another mother navigating these decisions feel less alone in how emotionally complex they can be.

The original purpose of this post, though, was ultimately about family dynamics, boundaries, and emotional safety after a difficult first birth/postpartum experience.

Hello everyone! I’m a new mom of a premature 3 month old and I’m have a hard time being okay with myself. I only got 2 ounces this last feeding and she normally eats 4 oz. I had to go get similac and I’ve been beating myself up. I pumped for 30 minutes 3 hours prior and when I pumped again I only got 2oz which was enough for the feeding since she had 4oz one hour before. I’m feeling awful about myself because I feel like I could’ve been more proactive on my supply. It hurts my heart knowing it had to get some formula for overnight. I’m still going to pump and continue to give her breastmilk when I can but I just keep beating myself up over this formula. Is it awful of me to switch so early? Is it bad to go back and forth from breastmilk and formula? I feel like I’m overwhelming myself over something so small to others. Any thoughts would be helpful. I just need to know I’m not doing a wrong thing. My fiance is so calm and we talked about what I can do to make myself feel better and do more to help with lactation, but I’m still on the rocks with myself.

Hi everyone :) not a mum myself but my best friend has just given birth to her first baby. I am sooo excited for her and I wanted to come on here and ask for advice on how I can help support her as the best friend I can be! I was hoping for some input on what your friends did for you that helped you out when you were a new mum, or what you wished your friends had done more of? Or less of!

She has very supportive family and partner btw, so this is purely from a friend point of view :)

My LO is 11 months old and super clingy, so I literally have to carry her around all the time, even while cooking. Yesterday I was making egg for myself and put her down near my legs for seconds because I needed both hands. She started crying to be picked up and suddenly some oil splashed onto her face and my legs. 😭 She has tiny first and second degree burns on her face. We rushed to the doctor immediately and got ointments/gels and everything, and they said it should heal.

Thankfully she’s ok. She’s back to her normal self but I honestly cannot stop crying or replaying the moment in my head. I feel so guilty and miserable. I can’t even look at her face without feeling horrible that this happened because of me. I’m struggling mentally and can’t even get myself to sleep properly thinking about it. I keep worrying if she will be left with scars and I can’t stop overthinking it.

I know accidents happen but right now I genuinely can’t forgive myself. Has any other mom gone through something similar with burns or kitchen accidents? Did it heal okay?

I totally hit a breaking point this morning. 4 weeks postpartum and I thought I had things figured out but I woke up today with my breasts feeling like actual literal bricks.

Like skin stretched shiny and it hurts to even breathe. I grabbed my wearables I usually love because they’re so convenient and I sat there for 45 minutes on the highest setting. My nipples were being yanked within an inch of their life but when I looked at the cups there was barely half an ounce. The heaviness and that deep throbbing ache just didnt budge at all.

I ended up down a total rabbit hole of research and frantic calls to a lactation consultant because I was convinced my supply had just dried up or something. Turns out I’ve been doing this all wrong.

My LC explained that stuffing a wearable pump inside a bra when you’re already swollen is like trying to unkink a garden hose by stepping on it. The pressure from the bra and the pump itself was actually pinching my ducts shut and the tiny motors in those things just dont have the vibrational depth to break up that kind of deep congestion.

To make matters worse I’ve been struggling with a slacker boob on the left so I’ve been cranking up the suction to try and get something out of that side but all I did was bruise and blister my good side because the settings arent independent. I’m sitting here with ice packs feeling totally defeated and realizing that if I want to actually build my supply and keep my sanity I need a real hospital grade breast pump.

I’m ready to invest in a heavy duty medical grade desktop pump. I honestly dont care if its bulky or has to stay plugged into the wall at this point. I just need something with a hospital strength motor that actually works. I'm looking for recommendations for a pump that has a dual motor or some kind of independent control so I can stop punishing one side for the other sides laziness. Also if theres a pump that has a soft start or a more gradual suction mode please let me know. My nipples are so sensitized right now that I need something that wont feel like a vacuum cleaner from hell the second I turn it on.

Has anyone made the switch back to a medical grade desktop for the same reason? What actually got your clogs out and helped you build supply without that sharp pain? I’m desperate for a recommendation that balances that deep powerful suction with a gentle enough touch to let me heal.

Looking for some reassurance as a ftm. My husband and I have both had horrific colds. My husband first, with symptoms starting about 12 days ago, then me about 5 days ago. My husband is fully better as of 2 days ago, but I am still dealing with lingering symptoms although much better.

Our 2 month old thankfully has only had some mild congestion, extra sleepiness and has reduced feed volume by about 2 oz. of formula a day for the past 4 days.

I just want reassurance that we're probably in the clear with her as far as getting significantly worse at least from this bout of illness.

I'm so terrified of her developing a fever or getting bad respiratory symptoms, but at this point she's had 4 days of noticeable symptoms and almost 2 weeks of exposure from both of us without getting much worse.

So do you think we lucked out and it'll stay mild? Or are we not out of the woods yet? If we're not, how many more days until I can relax and not feel like a terrible mom for getting my baby sick?

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Hey 😊

Quick question: during the postpartum period (you’re so tired 😅), did you keep your things and the baby’s things all in one place so they’d be within easy reach?

Did that really make your life easier, or not really?

How much did you spend on your nursery/rocking chairs? Did you get rocking or gliding and do you like it? Any recommendations are welcome :)

Hi all! Looking for advice/experiences from anyone who has dealt with suspected CMPA/milk protein intolerance.

My baby started having diarrhea around 1 month old that lasted for about 2 months. He also had poor weight gain (~15th percentile), so our pediatrician referred us to GI. Even though he tested negative for occult blood twice, GI recommended switching from breastmilk to hypoallergenic formula for presumed milk protein allergy/intolerance.

I initially pumped and froze my breastmilk, but he has now been on Nutramigen for the past 3 months. It has honestly been a difficult journey. He had major bottle refusal at first and still struggles with intake. At 6 months, he only takes about 20–24 oz/day, but he is at least growing steadily along his curve now and stools have normalized.

GI continues to recommend holding off on reintroducing my frozen breastmilk for now, and instead potentially introducing it later mixed into solids.

My hesitation is that I never really wanted to stay on Nutramigen long term because:

- he seems to dislike the taste

- feeding has always been a struggle

- I would prefer a “cleaner” or higher quality formula if possible

Before all of this we had used Bobbie and Kendamil. I’ve always wondered whether HIPP HA might have been a better option, but our GI is not familiar with it and advised against switching formulas again since things are currently stable. I’m also confused about whether HIPP HA is partially vs extensively hydrolyzed and whether it would even be appropriate for a baby with suspected CMPA.

At this point I’m scared to “rock the boat” since he is finally doing okay, but we still have another ~6 months of formula feeding ahead and I keep wondering whether I should explore another option.

Would love to hear:

- experience with Nutramigen long term

- experience with HIPP HA

- whether anyone successfully transitioned from Nutramigen to another formula around this age

- experiences reintroducing frozen breastmilk later on

Thank you!!

Hi all - new to this sub. My LO is struggling to latch so i’ve essentially been EP for the last 3.5 weeks. I love my spectra pump but being home alone with baby makes it hard to be able to “plug in” every 2-3hrs, especially since baby always seems to get fussy/wake up the moment i get pumping.

I ordered a wearable so i’d be able to walk over and soothe baby during pump sessions and so i could walk around and tidy while pumping but i dont intend the wearable to be my primary pump.

I researched wearable models for DAYS and got the momcozy S12. The left side has worked fine the two times ive tried it although output is lower than normal pump. However the right side has leaked BOTH times. Im at my wits end. ChatGPT told me to try Paruu brand and i see the wearable is only around $70 so at least it won’t be over $100 wasted if it’s not a quality pump.

My issue is i need flange size 28mm and i noticed a lot of wearables don’t get that large. This Paruu one supposedly fits 28mm.

TLDR: does anyone have Paruu wearable pump? Which model is best? Does it fit 28mm? Do you recommend? Thank you

Hi! My baby is 6.5 months old, she’s always been a great napper and a very good sleeper overnight. We have enjoyed following the moms on call schedule - so she sleeps from 7:45 pm - 7:00 am, then naps from 9:00 am - 10:30 am, naps from 1:00 pm - 2:45 pm, and occasionally has a cat nap from 4:45-5:15 if it seems needed for her. However, the last 3-4 days her naps have been super questionable, she is only napping 30 min, sometimes 45. Sometimes she will even wake up for 20 minutes, then go back to sleep for 45 min - 1 hour. Is this possibly a sleep regression for her? We got lucky and didn’t have any signs of a sleep regression at 4 months, so this is very new for her. I usually let her lay in her crib for 15 - 25 min before getting her up to see if she will go back to sleep. She doesn’t get fussy at all, however she is very sleepy whenever I do get her up. Constantly yawning, rubbing her eyes and will want to lay down earlier sometimes due to not napping well previously.