r/EckhartTolle

I’m curious if others here are going through something similar.

For years I’ve been deeply drawn to spirituality, meditation and presence teachings, especially Eckhart Tolle. Through retreats, inner work, silence and life experiences, something in me slowly started changing. Not in a dramatic “I found the answers” kind of way, but more like layers falling away. I started questioning certain ways of living, social dynamics, ambition, identity, friendships and what truly feels meaningful.

The strange thing is: I don’t actually feel lonely.

I feel very connected to my partner, baby, dog, family, a few close friends, nature, daily life itself. I can genuinely enjoy simple things like walking, cooking, caring for my child or sitting quietly. There’s a lot of peace in my life.

But at the same time, I notice I’m naturally drifting away from many friendships and also rarely feel the pull to develop deeper friendships with most new people I meet. I can connect warmly with people in daily life, but often it feels like the conversations stay on a layer that no longer fully nourishes me.

What I miss sometimes is being able to speak openly about presence, consciousness, inner transformation, spirituality, meaning, stillness… without it feeling forced or abstract.

It almost feels like my inner world changed faster than my outer social world.

I’m wondering:

• Have others experienced this shift too and how did you deal with it?
• How do you navigate friendships and connection during this phase of life?
• Did new aligned people eventually enter your life naturally?

I’ve been reading Eckhart Tolle lately and I genuinely understand the idea of being present instead of constantly living in fear, regret, or mental noise.

But one thing I still struggle with is this:

How do you balance “living in the now” with making major life decisions and planning your future?

For example, career choices, relationships, moving to another city, finances, long-term goals etc. all require thinking ahead. Sometimes it feels impossible to stay present when your future has real consequences.

Where is the line between healthy planning and ego-based overthinking?

And how do people who follow Tolle’s teachings deal with uncertainty without becoming passive or detached from real life responsibilities?

Do children have an ego according to Eckhart Tolle?

Kids seem naturally present and “in the moment,” but they also show things like jealousy, possessiveness, and a need for validation pretty early.

So where does Tolle draw the line between a healthy sense of self and the ego?
What does he say about it?

I followed Eckhart for a few years and a lot of what he says is good. However in retrospect some of what he says can just be more ego. For example here are some quotes by him. 'You are here to enable the divine purpose of the Universe to unfold. That is how important you are!' 'Be the awakened one.' 'Be the buddha' 'you are the body'. 'Be the witness'

I have followed other traditions and yogic teachings. For example the idea that shiva is emptiness. Not to be identified with anything including the body or witnessing presence.

I wonder how to apply Eckharts teachings in case of what I call generalized anxiety, a low-grade state of fear I find myself in quite often. Sometimes it’s linked to some event in the future and I feel I’m gonna fail, and sometimes it just running in the background with seemingly no specific reason.

(About me 23 yo, practising Zen Buddhist meditation in my local sangha but don’t have easy access to any actual teachers)

Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely mindwander, and quite often, the thing is. For me coming back from my thoughts is not a problem, at least if we understand it as ceasing to think. This part is pretty fine in my practice. The issue is the coming back part. I am so frustrated by it because almost all teachings omit this point. You are just simply expected to come back but what is coming back how is it done? After I recognize a thought as a thought I don't continue to think it, but I think the world is kinda not sharp enough, confusing and strange. Being present feels strange and often I just get intensely focussed on a point in space or sensation and everything else kinda fades away then, so when I try to invite some peripheral awareness in, I feel dizzy (not physically more like mentally). There is this feeling of heaviness after coming back
If I have some negative thoughts and I let them go my general state of aversion does not go away. So you may say that I should allow it to be. Fine but what if it makes me behave ugly towards my boyfriend or be mean to him, or be rude to someone at the store. I may not do it, and nowadays I almost never actually do any of this stuff but I feel the need. So I sit with my bf and we are watching TV and I feel like every comment he’s making about it is making me mad (but I also find them funny, and intelligent, so feeling mad is totally unconnected to anything) But I do not become ugly to him, buuuut I am spending the time that could be relaxing feeling what I am feeling at this moment
I also often just feel that I am, like really I can observe a lot but do very little and when I try to do something I get overwhelmed feeling not well enough in doing the thing. So I can be peeling potatoes and get this feeling that I am not doing this good enough and just stop kinda freeze there thinking about how to be more present but it is more like straining “come on do this” rather than thinking actual words.
So my question is how to deal with something like this, like this blockade that stops a lot of things that I do very quickly after I’ve started doing anything? Where to put my attention how to do it? 

[supprimé]

Hi everyone,

I got into spirituality in 2020 when I came across Eckhart’s work. It definitely changed my life. I realized more about life and myself. A few years later I got more into it because of personal issues. Now I’m out of a few years of really contemplating this work and I feel like I’m not where I thought I’d be. I do have mental health professionals who help, and I’m figuring out career as a young person, but something just feels amiss. Im wondering if I need to reframe my thinking about identity and ego- because I always thought that Eckhart said to transcend ego, but now I feel I need to embrace it and deal with my life as it really is.

I feel like I’ve had issues around gender and what not. I know this isn’t the sub for it, but I just don’t think people would understand my dilemma anywhere else- balancing Eckhart’s view of the ego with actual real life issues. It feels like he’s saying nothing actually matters and it’s all in the head. I’m not sure if I’m getting it right. I’m starting a meditation program soon so hopefully I’ll better understand. Any advice would be appreciated.

Hello to all the reditors, so I started practicing the law and my use for technique is the most ancient and realistic technique thought by Neville SATS.

i started practicing the law/technique more often now and seriously as I have encountered few success in the past using this technique. i am bad doing this technique in night when going to sleep although I am trying my best to do it daily practice but I feel that I do it easily during the day when doing a meditation.

Now, after starting the practice for my current particular manifestation. what I am experiencing is the opposite dream of my desire when I sleep. for whatever I am practicing the law I do dream opposite when I sleep. and it's a bit of not daily but frequent dream I am experienced.

Now, what is that's mean someone please tell. is that mean my dream will not come true, or is it showing me my past reprogramming of my desire or something else!

and what should I do in this situation although I am pretty consistent by ignoring whatever I experienced in my dreams to prove Neville's words that IMAGINATION CREATES REALITY.

PLEASE SHARE YOUR OPINION.

THANK YOU.

Either I used to be completely unaware of these feelings or they have truly finally emerged from suppression. Regardless,I do recently experience quite intense reactions of fearful sort especially when interacting to other people in daily life and I am trying to not show it.

I am aware of these thoughts and feelings as they come more or less and am not fully identified with them. But I wonder what to do, how to handle this situation let's say while I talk to a coworker or manager or a customer? How to handle this moment without freaking them out and freaking myself out more? And also about more intimate connections? I don't want others to think it's their fault or something and dont want to push them away and also don't really want to exactly open up about whats going on too deeply, which actually I might not even fully understand myself. So what to do ? I really feel it might be helpful for me to limit my social interactions, until I work this out a bit more. But even then, with the remaining social interactions, what to do when this fear comes up?

Thank you for any help with this!

Hi, I recently started reading Eckhart Tolle and it made me think about something I’ve honestly never really questioned before: do dogs actually have an ego?

Not “ego” in the everyday sense of arrogance, but in the way Tolle describes it. This constant mental self-story humans seem to live inside of all the time. Thinking about the past, worrying about the future, comparing ourselves to others, building identities around suffering, success, appearance, status, relationships etc.

And when I look at dogs, they obviously have emotions, instincts, attachment, fear, territorial behavior and distinct personalities. But they don’t seem psychologically trapped in their own minds the way humans are. A dog might react aggressively or anxiously in a moment, but it doesn’t feel like they sit there thinking “I’m a failure” or replaying something embarrassing from three years ago.

They seem much more immediate somehow. More present. Not “spiritually enlightened”, just less mentally split.

Honestly, I think that might even be part of why people find dogs so calming to be around. Especially calm, grounded breeds. There’s something very direct and non-performative about them. No social masks, no weird passive aggression, no endless self-analysis. Just a kind of steady presence.

At the same time I also don’t want to romanticize animals too much. Dogs clearly have social hierarchies, competition, possessiveness and complex behavioral patterns. So maybe they do have some form of self-concept, just not this highly narrative, psychologically layered ego humans have.

I’m curious what people think about this from philosophical, psychological or biological perspectives. Do animals have an ego in any meaningful sense, or only a basic sense of self?

A dear friend of mine got spiritually awakened during the pandemic and found her calling. I was always intrigued by the stories she told, even though sometimes it sounded a little preachy, so I decided to start my own journey. That’s how I found Eckhart.

I read/listened to most of his books and lectures and genuinely started feeling great. I was kind of living in the present without constantly thinking about the past or future, and a lot of my anxiety and fears almost disappeared. I started accepting situations for what they were instead of trying to control or correct everything.

But over the last couple of months, I feel like I’ve completely lost that path. I don’t know if it’s the ego Eckhart talks about, laziness, or something else, but something feels missing and I can’t seem to get back to that mindset. My anxiety and fears have come back, I constantly overthink my future, and I struggle to accept the present as it is.

I also tried being around other spiritually awakened people like Eckhart suggests and joined the same spiritual organization my friend did, but honestly it started feeling like the same religious stuff I’ve been trying to get away from my whole life “our god is the greatest,” “the world is ending,” “our god will take over,” etc.

I know this turned into a bit of a rant, but my brain will not stop overthinking right now. I’d really appreciate any suggestions on how to get back on track without feeling like I’m forcing myself into something unnatural.

Any advice would be appreciated!

after reading the power of now the first time, I immediately understood that I needed to dis identify from the mind, and I started doing that. But then, after reading through it a third time, I just realized that you also dis identify from the pain body. so anytime you have a negative physical reaction, like anxiety in your shoulders, or something like that, then you say “the pain body is feeling x.” feel it, don’t judge it. same as “the mind is saying x.” without judgement. is this the best way to approach it?

and before I used to think being the “silent watcher” meant watching your mind, but watching what is going on around you being present. Then I realized this time through that being the silent watcher means watching everything that’s going on INSIDE of you, both in the mind and pain body.

I need a senior quote for my yearbook and I’m looking for something short (around 10 words, more or less).

I really like quotes about mindset, perspective, presence, and the way thoughts shape experience. Stuff similar to Eckhart Tolle, Alan Watts, stoicism, etc. Not too edgy or overly motivational — more simple, meaningful, and timeless.

Some quotes/vibes I already like:

“The end was never the point.”

“This moment is the only place life ever happens.”

“Perspective changes everything.”

“The way you see changes what you experience.”

And my favorite quote overall is: “The primary cause of unhappiness is not the situation you're in but your thoughts about it.”

Anyone got quotes with that kind of vibe

Around a year ago I went to travel 1000km on my own for a festival. I found real intense and pure love there and decided to stay there with my love.

I felt so light, happy and in the now when I decided to read the Power of Now, and everything I read there made sense, I felt it. It became clear to me that the feeling I was feeling was described as being enlightened by Eckhart Tolle. I was in this state for around 10 months. During that time I learned so much about myself and spirituality and I feel like I grew so much spiritually.

After about 9 months of being in that relationship I saw that the relationship was not healthy for me anymore and we broke up and I traveled back to my home country in the same day.

When I came home after the breakup I traveled again, for 10.000 km this time to stay somewhere for a month and learn more about spirituality inside of me. I continued to grow spiritually during that time and learned so much more about myself.

Now it's around a year later since my first travel I described here and I feel like I'm struggling with being in the now as much as before. I feel like I'm thinking more again and my head and body are more with my friends and family than with spirituality. I am less in touch with my body and spirituality. I don't know if I feel enlightened anymore.

I really want to continue to grow spiritually and I know that it shouldn't be tied to a person or environment. Still it feels hard to grow spiritually here or be in the now here and I don't know what I can do. I would love some advice. If anyone has any questions, please feel free to ask. And thank you so much for taking the time to read this <3 :)