Weirdly, when I see photos of other peoples dermatillomania, it’s mainly their faces, and I was wondering if it’s just me who picks their hands and feet, I just wanted to know if it’s just me who picks their hands and feet this bad!
For context I’m a first year uni student living away from home. I’m alone and I have been stressed out with all my exams. I’m on ADHD meds which I’ve learnt makes this all a bit worse. Besides that, I had an exam I was procrastinating and spent like 6 hrs just picking at my legs. The next day I woke up with it being tender and I noticed some had pus marks. I put savalon over it and pimple patches but I popped it first. The pimple patches didn’t hold and more infected like pimples almost keep appearing where I picked my legs. I’ve got at least 20 and some are really red and warm to touch. I’m worried about it but nothing is working. I don’t have a lot of money to buy anything crazy special but I just don’t know how to get them to heal faster. Any advice helps!
I have struggled with this condition as long as I can remember, and now after spending close to 2 months actively trying to recover I think I can finally say that I am no longer a skin picker!! I will share everything I've tried and what worked vs what didn't. (DISCLAIMER: I am not a medical professional or a psychiatrist and what worked for me might not work the same way for everyone!!)
What didn't work:
- Skin icing. It's a helpful tool and really helps to soothe skin that has been picked, but it doesn't address the root problem. I would just pick again the next day.
- Fake nails. Also helpful, but only temporary. As soon as those nails came off, I was right back to where I started, if not worse.
- Tracking streaks. This only made me feel bad when I broke the streak, especially since I would try to get a higher streak every time. I remember breaking a 5 day streak and instantly giving up because beating that felt like an insurmountable task.
The ONLY THING that worked was changing my mindset. I tried the shortcuts and the hacks but unfortunately, I learned the hard way that you can't solve a mental issue with a physical solution. So here's how I changed the way I viewed my skin.
- I changed my identity. We all have different words and phrases we use to describe ourselves, and if you're a member of this subreddit, chances are one of those phrases for you is "skin picker" (girl, same). But I eventually realized, if I wanted to shift my identity from "skin picker" to "person with healthy skin," that had to start someday. And I couldn't just wait for my skin to magically heal before I adopted that identity switch. I realized that even if I had just demolished my face 20 minutes ago, I still had the authority and the agency to decide that enough was enough. Someone with healthy skin wouldn't do that, and if I ever wanted to become that person, I had to do it even when it wouldn't be instantly rewarding.
- Current trajectory over current results (if you don't recognize this quote, PLEASE read atomic habits! It really helped me on this journey). When you look in the mirror and notice the scabs that still cover your skin, just remember that you are HEALING. It doesn't matter whether or not you're already healed as long as that's the direction you're headed in!! Be kind to yourself and understand that it's about the process, not the destination.
- It's not about getting clear skin. This kinda ties in with my previous point but this is SUPER important to get drilled into your head. If you're anything like me and struggle with picking at acne, you will notice pretty quickly that your acne gets drastically better when you give your skin a break from your pesky fingers for a while. You might get excited and start daydreaming about what youll look like with clear skin. DON'T!!!!!! JUST. DON'T. Think about it. When you were a skin picker, you would poke and prod at every blemish because your skin just HAD to be smooth. You couldn't stand the bumps and imperfections and that's what got you here. So next time you're scrolling social media and you see a model with "perfect" skin and start to feel inadequate, just remember that is the same mindset that left you covered with scabs and dreading the shower because the hot water would hurt. Never again. You're worth more than that.
I really hope this can at least help one person. If this is worded weirdly please let me know so I can clarify or edit my post. Thanks for reading!!
(btw no AI was used in creating this post)
I've been buying these things for like two years now. The cheap Amazon ones stop spinning after a month. The Etsy ones look nice but the texture doesn't really match what I'm actually trying to replace, if that makes sense? Like I need something that gives my fingers the same kind of feedback as picking, but without the damage.
Has anyone found one that actually works long-term? Or am I just chasing something that doesn't exist lol. I'm getting kind of tired of spending money on rings that end up in a drawer.
Also — do you guys wear them on your picking hand or the other hand? I can never decide.
I dig my nails into my hands when the stress gets too much.
Not enough to bleed. Just enough pain to snap back. To stay present when everything else is pulling me under.
I work in finance. Long hours. Weeks away from my family. The anxiety doesn't ask permission. It just shows up.
And when it does, my hands find their way to each other. Without me even noticing.
I spent years thinking something was wrong with me.
Hi, I will not tell my age, but I am in middle school and I struggle with picking the skin on my arms, face, and hairline. My arms are the worst and I can’t wear tank tops anymore because people are disgusted by them. I also have eczema and I have keratosis pilaris on my arms which is the main trigger. I find myself constantly pausing to check my arms and find something to pick, and every time I go to my bathroom I scan my face and pick even though I barely have any acne. All my mother does is snap her fingers at me when she sees me picking and tells me to stop. She tells me that I will have scars and says she will take me to the doctor or a therapist if I don’t stop. Everyone else in my family either ignores it or tells me to stop and that it grosses people out. Every time someone tells me to just stop it makes me want to pick more out of spite. I know it’s terrible and my arms look terrible but I just can’t stop and I don’t know how. I have adhd but my mother doesn’t want me to go on medication. I likely am on the spectrum and I probably have contamination ocd. It’s a struggle and if I don’t stop now it will get worse.
Só queria desabafar um pouco. Às vezes, pesquiso coisas relacionadas a isso porque me ajuda a me acalmar, mas ao mesmo tempo me sinto muito perdida.
Nunca fui diagnosticada porque nunca procurei tratamento, mas lido com isso desde os 14 anos — e não tive um único dia de folga. Sinto que não sei como cuidar de mim mesma, física ou mentalmente. Também nunca tive muito apoio da minha família nesse sentido.
Com o tempo, as coisas pioraram. Acabo cutucando meu próprio corpo repetidamente — dedos das mãos, dedos dos pés, lábios, costas, estômago. Cheguei a um ponto em que não vejo mais pessoas falando sobre isso nesse nível, o que me faz sentir ainda mais isolada e estranha.
Um exemplo extremo: basicamente destruí algumas das minhas unhas dos pés ao longo dos anos e, mesmo agora, aos 22, ainda não consigo parar. Nessas áreas, quase não sinto mais dor, então mesmo quando estou machucada, continuo. Parece um ciclo do qual não consigo sair.
O que torna tudo mais difícil é ouvir comentários de familiares ou amigos sobre a aparência dos meus pés. Isso me afeta mais do que eles provavelmente imaginam — me faz sentir envergonhada, como se houvesse algo errado comigo.
Há outra parte disso que me confunde ainda mais.
Eu realmente não sei o que há de errado comigo, mas não se trata apenas do meu próprio corpo. Às vezes, se eu toco em uma "imperfeição física" em outra pessoa, sinto uma forte vontade de cutucá-la também. Isso me assusta, porque me deixa ansiosa para interagir com outras pessoas.
E não para por aí. Também acontece com objetos. Qualquer coisa emborrachada ou com algum tipo de textura irregular — sinto essa necessidade quase automática de mexer nela até que pareça "certa". O problema é que não consigo parar no meio do caminho — só paro depois de basicamente destruir tudo.
Isso me faz sentir muito mal, porque parece que não tenho controle. É como se minha mente se fixasse nisso até que esteja "consertado", mesmo quando sei que estou piorando as coisas.
Honestamente, parece desesperador...
Sorry about my English, I'm terrible at it
I’m thinking of just constantly wearing gloves during the day with Aquaphor and/or jojoba oil to heal the open wounds and stop the biting. Any thoughts?
In the past couple months I've developed a round bald patch. It's at the back of my head, not the top where I'd expect, and its not the most common place I'd touch or scratch. In fact its pretty smooth, no obvious signs of a problem or sadly any soon to return hair.
I brought it up with my doctor, currently waiting for test results.
Hormones and stress are likely culprits in my case, but immune response is another possible cause. It occurs to me as I've been pretty rough on my skin the past couple days that I'm probably giving my immune system a run for its money.
Anyone have any experience or connections with this? It's tough to find info because it mostly comes up with Trichotillomania, which is not my case.
i’ve been skin picking for atleast 5 years. it gets better sometimes but right now it’s bad. i go to school every day and im around people a lot, so no i cant wear gloves or finger coverings. i can only manage a few bandaids when ive relapsed really badly. this is the time where i need to stop it so it doesnt keep affecting me later in life
I’ve been picking at the skin on my chin and the sides of my face for around 3 years and have a lot of dark brown, pink scars on my face. I just want to get some hope and see if anyones been able to get rid of their scars and with what methods? My doctor has suggested tretanoin but i’ve seen some people say only laser will work!
I know it’s horrible, but sometimes I like when it gets worse. Part of me likes when I’m limping around after an episode because it’s almost as if I’m being punished for having no control over my impulses. It’s like a strange form of justice. Of course there is a lot of distress there too, but it’s a complicated thing. I like it and I hate it.
I've started wearing a bonnet to try and keep myself from picking. I feel through the bonnet and just confirm that the scabs are there or how big they are, and then I have to force myself to put my hands away. I've managed to leave the big ones alone for 2 days because I gave myself a fever a few times, and because I was genuinely going to lance the bubbles so I could inspect the fluid inside.
This is so difficult. The infection on my head and my incessant picking all over my body spread the infection to my leg and now it's swollen and hot, and I'm avoiding picking it for 2 days now, too, since my fever hit around 102.
I hope I can keep this up. The infection is spreading to my forehead. It's puffy and hot and painful to the touch. I'm so tired of my head hurting.
I’ve been picking my lips and scalp for 18 years. If I wear acrylic nails I will stop picking my scalp. But I have never managed to stop picking my lips.. until now! I haven’t touched them for a month thanks to a lot of willpower and Vaseline. But it’s like the skin won’t grow back. The outer layer just falls of after a day. I try to cut loose skin of with a nail tool so I won’t pick it of.
Does anyone have advice on something that will help the skin heal properly? My doctor wants to help me, but don’t know of anything.
I’m so proud of myself, but it feels kind of hopeless. Every hour of every day feels like a battle..
I have so many pick marks and wounds completely covering my chest, shoulders, arms, and legs. I absolutely hate it and it makes me so self conscious but I have no idea how to stop, I try to stop everyday and fail.
I just hate that most likely this is going to be another summer where it’s 100+ degrees and I’m still wearing long sleeves, jackets and sweatshirts, and long pants. I so badly want to wear adorable tops, and shorts, and cute dresses, etc, but I just can’t with my skin looking the way it does.
Well, I mean I know technically I CAN, but I just don’t want to, I can’t stand the stares and people commenting on it. I’ve had someone ask if I was on meth one time that I tried to wear a t-shirt in public.
This disorder just freaking sucks, I miss when I was a kid and I could wear whatever I wanted and didn’t have a single blemish on my skin to worry about.
I haven’t worn a tank top or shorts in probably 10 years. I always wanted to get some tattoos to cover up the scars left behind from picking but to do that I’d have to actually, you know…stop.
21f, i have been picking my skin for years now and want to put an end to it. my skin looks nasty af, and covering it up with bandaids look weird. i am forced to wear long sleeves and pants even during hot weather because of this. this has also affected how i look at myself. i often end up feeling that i wont be loved because of how i look. i have even decided to maybe cover these marks up with tats in future but i gotta stop picking my skin to begin with .
the worst part is that i still end up doing it even when i am well aware that i should be avoiding it. will consulting a psychiatrist help , are there any medications for this?
been picking for as long as I can remember, also have severe eczema. they go hand in hand in making my life harder.
I feel like I'm getting more obsessive. Every little imperfection, every scab I can feel, normal skin even. I do it when I'm bored, when I'm stressed, I do it so often I don't even realize.
I've bled all over everything. At my bfs family's house. In public. On the couch. Even with his (bfs) constant support and corrections, it feels like it hasn't been helping. It's deeply personal and so hard to accept any help. I've had severe infections, scarring everywhere, body-horroresque moments dating all the way back to the ages of four or five. Frequently feel childish and stubborn for resisting help when I do it over and over.
Recently saw a dermatologist, who had hope they could relieve the worst of my eczema, but I fear I won't ever be able to control myself skin picking wise. any words of kindness are very appreciated .
As a 30 year old female, I have been picking my skin for about 17 years. My main focus is on pimples/blackheads/skin texture, and pick at my face, arms, legs, neck, back, scalp and chest. I cannot seem to stop, no matter how much I try to tell myself not to. The smallest bump on my skin or a very tiny darkened pore is enough to make me pick for hours. I feel like the only way to get the gunk out of a pore is by squeezing it, as it doesn’t seem like products have helped much. While picking has damaged my skin, I also can’t help but feel like it’s the only way to get stuff out of my skin (whether I pick with my fingers or a tool). I unconsciously do it at home and work, feeling my arms and shoulders for any slight bump or blemish. My pick at one dry flaky spot on my scalp and have for years, and obviously has no healed. I’ve gotten rid of a close-up mirror, but I still seem to manage to pick no matter what situation I’m in or what I try to do or take away. I wear a hat to cover my forehead which then makes spots worse, and therefore makes picking worse. I’ve spent literally thousands of dollars on skin care products and treatments. I DO NOT KNOW WHAT TO DO ANYMORE. I feel like this issue is bigger than me. There doesn’t seem to be any counsellors around that deal with this specific issue. My skin feels ruined.
Ok so I have ripped out all my lashes in middle school then went to my skin then my hair then my fingers and now my lips. I am a nursing student now and I am constantly picking my lips mindlessly or when I’m bored or stressed until my fingers get all bloody. It doesn’t even matter if I’m currently bleeding until continue to pick despite the pain. I’m afraid I’ll look ugly and I’m tired of kissing hurting and I want to stop but I don’t know how. I like have nooooooo bottom lip. I need something to replace the hand to mouth motion and the picking action but I don’t know what to replace it with.
This speeds up the healing so much. After this routine I can apply makeup over it the next day and all of the craters and wounds I’ve left in my face 95% healed and flat in 2 days max.
what makes the biggest difference to my skin healing without super crusty raised scabs is applying tattoo healing ointment like bepathen. when I’ve come to my senses and stopped hacking away at my face, I cleanse my skin and apply a thin layer. this keeps the skin moist and is made to reduce scabbing, scarring and inflammation as it’s super occlusive and basically acts as a liquid bandage to the skin. I believe bepanthen also contains 5% vit b5 which is probably why it’s so effective at healing broken skin.
on top of this I will apply a THICK opaque layer of Nivea cream in from the blue tin. It’s so rich and forms a barrier, preventing the spots from getting dry, flaky, and scabbing. it’s also great since it’s so opaque and smoothing so it stops me from looking at my skin or grazing over it. ( I do this even when I haven’t picked at my skin to prevent a picking session and it’s SO helpful).
now these are probably my most controversial and extreme measures to get my face right especially if I have something coming up where I don’t want to look like I’ve ripped my face apart lol.
once the wound is closed over (normally the next morning) I will SPARINGLY apply 1% hydrocortisone cream to reduce the inflammation and swelling. however I do this once a month MAXIMUM and will go super light handed.
if I picked really really badly at my skin I’ll take an oral antibiotic to prevent infection and further reduce inflammation.
anyways, take this with a grain of salt. im NOT a medical professional im just a girl i who obsesses over her skin way too much.