r/BigAgeGap

I (30F) recently started having sex with (48M). We’re not in a committed relationship yet. He’s well endowed and I don’t have much sexual experience. He often makes comments about his size and since we started having sex..it’s all he talks about. First time we had sex, he inspected my vagina with his finger as if to check whether I’m tight or not. His version of dirty talk is making me say that I love his big penis and often brags about how he’s the largest size I’ve ever taken. Last night he repeated something he once said in passing.. that he’s wrecked me and nobody else will get the chance to enjoy me. I finally called him out on it but he brushed it off as “just guy talk” and that I shouldn’t internalize it. Well.. too late. It’s making me feel insecure. Should I be concerned about this behavior? Is this abuse? A kink? He has other great qualities about him.

I’m 16F!! And can’t seem to find any older men to chat with I’m consenting age for Canada

Im a 20 year old girl, I’m a student and I’ve never ever had a relationship or even held hands with a man. Basically did absolutely nothing romantic or sexual before with anyone.It’s a personal choice because I get hit on a lot but never ever see my type in real life, plus I’m very busy with law school so I see it as a distraction. I don’t despise men I’m just not attracted to most men I see everyday. The few men I find attractive are mostly older men 35-50 but I never tried anything with them because theyre just too old and I kinda find it weird. Just thinking about dating someone a year younger than me repulses me so I don’t know how older men date younger women confidently.

Anyways, 3 weeks ago on my way to uni a 40+ yo good looking man approached me and asked me for my number, said I was extremely pretty and was very honest from the start : said that he wanted nothing serious. (By the way he’s a widower , lost his wife a year ago and has 3 children under 13). I was not phased by this because I’m not looking for a relationship either . I told him I was 20, he said he didn’t mind. I gave him my number and we went on a date later that day at a cafe. It went alright, I’m not very chatty when I first meet someone though. He very explicitly told me what he wanted to do with me so I warned him that I was a virgin. He asked me if I was sure that I wanted to lose my virginity to him, if I didn’t prefer doing it with someone I loved. I said no because I really don’t care and don’t see sex as something sacred. Not gonna lie I’ve wanted to lose it for a hot minute but I wasn’t interest in anyone to genuinely do it.

After the date he wanted me to go to his apartment and I said no, that I didn’t want to do it on the first date. He didn’t take it personally and we ended up going on a little walk around the streets , near my college campus. He kept leading us to deserted little alleys to kiss me and touch me. To be honest I enjoyed it but it felt fucking wrong. The worst is when we encountered people and he let go of my hand as if he knew people would judge him for walking hands in hands with a young woman.

Anyways, later that night he texted me a lot of sensual things and I accepted to see him the day after at his apartment.(i was horny as hell sorry) I only told my sister about him and I didn’t reveal his age but informed her that he was too old for me (she gave me a lecture , I don’t blame her) I showed her his Facebook page, shared his name and shared my location with her the day after because I was supposed to see him again.

He picked me up from uni and we went to his place. At first he wanted me to go in first, so he would join me minutes later. I told him there was no need to do that , his neighbours didn’t know me we didn’t need to hide. (I figured he didn’t want anyone seeing a 20 year old with him). Anyways, we ended up going in together. We mostly did foreplay because he couldn’t get hard because of the condom. He didn’t force me to do anything, made sure that I consented to everything he did to me and that I was comfortable. I really emphasise on that. He didn’t harass me or anything.

After that, we kept texting sensual things and sharing songs that we like. He wanted to see me again but I needed to take a week break to study because my finals are coming soon and everything we did really threw me off. (Because for reminder I was a virgin who never did anything with a guy and within 2 days I had my first kiss and gave/received oral sex with a guy 23 years old older than me. It’s A LOT for me and everything happened so fucking fast)

He didn’t get angry or anything but he started texting me a bit less to give me space i assume. A week later i texted him again . We ended up seeing each other again and that time we really did the devils tango. We talked at lot more on the pillow about life and stuff. I asked about his wife, where he traveled and so on. We really are in different places in life , but we get along. I think we get along because we don’t discuss a lot and I definitely feel that he tries to relate to some of the things I say but he doesn’t really understand them because we’re not from the same generation. I don’t actually care that we’re not that compatible because once again I’m not looking for husband material.
But this situation is completely startling me and I’m very disoriented. Everything happened so , too, quickly.

I have to mention some other things that threw me off . He sometimes has some Freudian slips. He once said “I’m excited to re-watch you” and corrected himself and said “see you again”. I’m absolutely frightened by the idea that he might record us when we do it. If he does I’ll report him without batting an eye I really don’t give a fuck. He also started talking to me about some threesomes and anal and I said uhhhhhhhhh sir,maybe not now????
Once again he’s not forcing me to do anything he’s really testing the waters. And weirdly even though it’s all just sexual I don’t feel taken advantage of, or used, because I’m here for sex too and we’ve been pretty clear about that since the beginning. He’s probably taking advantage of this situation to explore his fantasies but I don’t really care because I am too.

I’m definitely getting attached to him because he’s really sweet .However Im not attached romantically because there’s something in me that stops me from falling for him. Maybe it’s because I’ve never been in love, maybe because it’s way too soon or maybe because HES 43 . I don’t know.I’m just extremely confused.

What do you guys think ?

[ Removed by Reddit on account of violating the content policy. ]

I met my man about 3 or so years ago when I started at new job in another state. I knew of him but it wasnt until the 2nd year he got my number and I drunkenly invited him over to my house.

I have been happy but there has been tough times to handle. His family know of my age and love me as their own but no one apart from them knows about our relationship.

For awhile theres been medical problems on his side and ive been trying my best to support him and his parents despite all the pressure and stress that it has put me under.

He says im the one thing that makes him happy and not depressed. He relies on me a lot emotionally. But I feel like I miss being single and im young/dumb and i want to have fun. Im not sure anymore if I want to be stuck in such a big gap relationship hiding secrets. I miss having my own time and space; I feel bad for being distant but I want to focus on myself.

I also feel like we're at different life stages. Im starting to build my life on my own and hes already doing his life and owns a couple houses. I say I dont want kids but what if in the future I want some?. Im not sure what I want

I know he would take it really badly if we broke up and I would have to see him around work. I want to be there for him still but not in a relationship I guess. He said his previously relationship ended badly when things got tough for him.

I dont know what to do.

Let's chat and see how things go. I'm not looking to rush anything. Tell me about you. I'm open to 40 and older. I think grandpas are sexy too.

Hey :) I'll try not to over explain since I believe the title says everything itself. I'm a 24 year old girl who's into older men and I'd like to talk to someone - I'm not trying to play around or be silly, boys my age are boring and dumb and the fact that they never seem to know what they want (or at least that's what they say) it's annoying, I've always been attracted to older men but as much as I'm attracted to them I also want to experience something genuine and honest, so yeah, I'd love to chat with someone! <3

my gf and i (#wlw) just recently got tgth apr 10th. i turned 18 this may, and she turns 17 in oct. i’ve had a few people tell me it’s fine, and a few tell me that it’s a little risky. i just want more opinions

Open to all ages and love older guys so please let me knows

😘

My older ex used to share me with 3 of his close friends. It felt weird at first and I was nervous, but I started to like it. My ex was in his 50's. His friends were around his age. Now I'm 20. I was thinking about other older men and if they've shared their gfs too.

My friends think it’s weird for me to be attracted to older men? Like 10 years older than me type difference. Is that really that odd? Or is it just not talked about as much?

I think I just like the power dynamic difference, but I’m still not sure. They think it stems from daddy issues, which is a possibility.

Any advice?

Hi, I'm pretty obsessed with the idea of flirting, chatting or dating older men. I'm a 20 year old girl from Europe. I'm chubby, with brown hair, brown eyes and white skin.

I prefer European and American men, over 40 please.

I’m 19 female and he’s 17 male.

Months and months ago a boy reached out to me,

He thought I was attractive and I thought the same of him.

He must have known my age before hand because it was in my bio.

We were getting along and he was the type of person that energy just flowed, it didn’t feel forced and we had similar interests etc then I asked him how old he was.

He said 17 I was shocked because he did look older but that doesn’t justify it, he also said “but I’m really tall” to try make me feel better?😭

It felt more morally incorrect because I knew he was still in school and I wasn’t.

So after expressing I was uncomfortable with it he said could we try again in a year? And I said sure because I just wanted to keep talking to him as we had similar interests and again the conversation was flowing so I thought why not.

But then the thing that makes me feel really guilty now is months after we had the conversation about how I was uncomfortable with it I decided to reach out.

I guess I just wanted to see where things could have gone and I didn’t want to wait the year to find out which I regret now.

He was happy i got back in contact with him and he told me he was planning to message me every month to let me know he’s still waiting on me which is sweet.

We began talking and i ended up getting caught up with my studies and became less and less interactive with him but i still let him know it’s nothing to do with him.

Time went on and we had planned to meet up over the summer but then he just kind of got dry back to me after I’d started texting more frequently.

I brought up how I was feeling and he was like I’ll do better and then left me on delivered for 2 days so I just removed him and we never spoke again, I’m not really sure what happened.

But that’s just some insight into the relationship the main thing I want to ask is was it bad to do the age gap. I felt bad about it and he always tried to reassure me but I just don’t know I feel guilty and definitely not something I’d ever do again because it didn’t feel right on my conscience. I also can’t remember when his birthday was and I removed him on Snapchat so I can’t check and do the maths unfortunately.

I just want an older man so I can fulfill all his desires 😪

I will want to meet & do things in person!

DM me if you're interested or want more details 😌💖

Divorced 9 years ago. Husband wealthy with planes/boats and helicopters. I filed for divorce as he had an affair with a younger woman. It did not last as he did not want to be a step-parent, we have 2 adult children.
He has known his wife since she was 18, put her through grad school and they have married after 7 years of intense travelling and fun. She has made him socially acceptable and he has hundreds on his IG account. They work together. He was a pretty awful husband and father but seems to have won the lottery. Is there anyway I can feel less resentful? I’m the same age as him.

I like to think I offer more than this, but it's a pretty good start for reddit right? Plus we can pretend like our day is a Ted talk and go off the rails a bit. Looking to meet some new people, maybe even an IRL friend or more, or at the least someone to chat with often. I'm happy to lead the conversation if you are not in the mood, all I ask is you like to chat and aren't dry. Open to any gender, age, location, etc. but bonus points if you are in the UK.