u/yeeboixD

24M here from the Philippines. I’ve realized I’ve been stuck in a cycle where I keep entertaining multiple women at the same time because I genuinely like different things about each of them, and they also genuinely seem to like me back. That’s what makes it harder for me to choose or let anyone go completely.

The problem is I also know it’s unfair because I can’t fully commit either. Here in the Philippines, exclusivity is a big deal for most girls and we obviously don’t practice polygamy, so I know continuing this setup long term will eventually hurt someone or make me lose all of them.

I think part of me likes keeping my options open because I’m afraid of choosing the wrong person or feeling like I missed out on someone better. But at the same time, I know this mindset is probably preventing me from building something deeper and more genuine with one person.

Has anyone here gone through the same phase before?

How did you eventually become more decisive or learn how to commit without feeling like you were losing everything else?

24M here from the Philippines. I’ve realized I’ve been stuck in a cycle where I keep entertaining multiple women at the same time because I genuinely like different things about each of them, and they also genuinely seem to like me back. That’s what makes it harder for me to choose or let anyone go completely.

The problem is I also know it’s unfair because I can’t fully commit either. Here in the Philippines, exclusivity is a big deal for most girls and we obviously don’t practice polygamy, so I know continuing this setup long term will eventually hurt someone or make me lose all of them.

I think part of me likes keeping my options open because I’m afraid of choosing the wrong person or feeling like I missed out on someone better. But at the same time, I know this mindset is probably preventing me from building something deeper and more genuine with one person.

Has anyone here gone through the same phase before?

How did you eventually become more decisive or learn how to commit without feeling like you were losing everything else?

24M here from the Philippines. I’ve realized I’ve been stuck in a cycle where I keep entertaining multiple women at the same time because I genuinely like different things about each of them, and they also genuinely seem to like me back. That’s what makes it harder for me to choose or let anyone go completely. The problem is I also know it’s unfair because I can’t fully commit either. Here in the Philippines, exclusivity is a big deal for most girls and we obviously don’t practice polygamy, so I know continuing this setup long term will eventually hurt someone or make me lose all of them. I think part of me likes keeping my options open because I’m afraid of choosing the wrong person or feeling like I missed out on someone better. But at the same time, I know this mindset is probably preventing me from building something deeper and more genuine with one person. Has anyone here gone through the same phase before? How did you eventually become more decisive or learn how to commit without feeling like you were losing everything else?

Thanks sa lahat ng nagbigay ng insights and advice. After reading your comments, I decided na i-pursue muna yung Network Engineer path.

Feeling ko mas magandang foundation siya long term especially if gusto ko eventually mag cloud or DevOps in the future.

For context:

- 24 yrs old

- Around 1 year as IT Helpdesk Engineer

- Currently earning around 40k

I’ll actually be the first Network Engineer for our PH office and ako hahawak ng local infra namin.

Question lang, magkano kaya reasonable na salary increase na pwede ko i-negotiate for this internal move considering malaking increase din siya in responsibility?

Would appreciate your thoughts. Thanks ulit guys 🙏

Thanks sa lahat ng nagbigay ng insights and advice. After reading your comments, I decided na i-pursue muna yung Network Engineer path.

Feeling ko mas magandang foundation siya long term especially if gusto ko eventually mag cloud or DevOps in the future.

For context:

- 24 yrs old

- Around 1 year as IT Helpdesk Engineer

- Currently earning around 40k

I’ll actually be the first Network Engineer for our PH office and ako hahawak ng local infra namin.

Question lang, magkano kaya reasonable na salary increase na pwede ko i-negotiate for this internal move considering malaking increase din siya in responsibility?

Would appreciate your thoughts. Thanks ulit guys 🙏

Guys, pa-help naman. Medyo magulo isip ko ngayon regarding sa career move ko.

​Helpdesk Engineer ako for 1 year na. Bale by June, lipat na dapat ako sa Tech Ops as Network Engineer—as in settled na dapat 'to. Kaso, naging close ko yung Software Engr Manager namin, tapos nabanggit niya na naghahanap sila ng internal hire for DevOps galing sa Helpdesk. Sabi niya okay lang kahit zero experience basta internal.

​Honestly, hindi ko naman "dream job" yung DevOps. Alam ko malaki sahod dun, pero mas leaning talaga ako sa Networking. Ang iniisip ko lang, baka manghinayang ako sa opportunity or sa potential salary growth kung tatanggihan ko yung DevOps offer.

​On the other hand, yung Network Engr role, andyan na sa harap ko at gusto ko talaga yung ginagawa dun.

​Worth it ba na subukan yung DevOps kahit 'di ko naman passion just for the career boost? O mas okay na mag-Network Engr muna ako since yun talaga yung interest ko, tapos tsaka na lang mag-isip kung mag-dedevops ako in the future?

​Hirap mag-decide baka kasi ma-miss out ko yung opportunity, pero ayaw ko rin namang ma-burnout sa trabahong 'di ko gusto. Ano tingin niyo? Salamat!

Guys, pa-help naman. Medyo magulo isip ko ngayon regarding sa career move ko.

​Helpdesk Engineer ako for 1 year na. Bale by June, lipat na dapat ako sa Tech Ops as Network Engineer—as in settled na dapat 'to. Kaso, naging close ko yung Software Engr Manager namin, tapos nabanggit niya na naghahanap sila ng internal hire for DevOps galing sa Helpdesk. Sabi niya okay lang kahit zero experience basta internal.

​Honestly, hindi ko naman "dream job" yung DevOps. Alam ko malaki sahod dun, pero mas leaning talaga ako sa Networking. Ang iniisip ko lang, baka manghinayang ako sa opportunity or sa potential salary growth kung tatanggihan ko yung DevOps offer.

​On the other hand, yung Network Engr role, andyan na sa harap ko at gusto ko talaga yung ginagawa dun.

​Worth it ba na subukan yung DevOps kahit 'di ko naman passion just for the career boost? O mas okay na mag-Network Engr muna ako since yun talaga yung interest ko, tapos tsaka na lang mag-isip kung mag-dedevops ako in the future?

​Hirap mag-decide baka kasi ma-miss out ko yung opportunity, pero ayaw ko rin namang ma-burnout sa trabahong 'di ko gusto. Ano tingin niyo? Salamat!

Guys, pa-help naman. Medyo magulo isip ko ngayon regarding sa career move ko.

​Helpdesk Engineer ako for 1 year na. Bale by June, lipat na dapat ako sa Tech Ops as Network Engineer—as in settled na dapat 'to. Kaso, naging close ko yung Software Engr Manager namin, tapos nabanggit niya na naghahanap sila ng internal hire for DevOps galing sa Helpdesk. Sabi niya okay lang kahit zero experience basta internal.

​Honestly, hindi ko naman "dream job" yung DevOps. Alam ko malaki sahod dun, pero mas leaning talaga ako sa Networking. Ang iniisip ko lang, baka manghinayang ako sa opportunity or sa potential salary growth kung tatanggihan ko yung DevOps offer.

​On the other hand, yung Network Engr role, andyan na sa harap ko at gusto ko talaga yung ginagawa dun.

​Worth it ba na subukan yung DevOps kahit 'di ko naman passion just for the career boost? O mas okay na mag-Network Engr muna ako since yun talaga yung interest ko, tapos tsaka na lang mag-isip kung mag-dedevops ako in the future?

​Hirap mag-decide baka kasi ma-miss out ko yung opportunity, pero ayaw ko rin namang ma-burnout sa trabahong 'di ko gusto. Ano tingin niyo? Salamat!

Guys, pa-help naman. Medyo magulo isip ko ngayon regarding sa career move ko.

​Helpdesk Engineer ako for 1 year na. Bale by June, lipat na dapat ako sa Tech Ops as Network Engineer—as in settled na dapat 'to. Kaso, naging close ko yung Software Engr Manager namin, tapos nabanggit niya na naghahanap sila ng internal hire for DevOps galing sa Helpdesk. Sabi niya okay lang kahit zero experience basta internal.

​Honestly, hindi ko naman "dream job" yung DevOps. Alam ko malaki sahod dun, pero mas leaning talaga ako sa Networking. Ang iniisip ko lang, baka manghinayang ako sa opportunity or sa potential salary growth kung tatanggihan ko yung DevOps offer.

​On the other hand, yung Network Engr role, andyan na sa harap ko at gusto ko talaga yung ginagawa dun.

​Worth it ba na subukan yung DevOps kahit 'di ko naman passion just for the career boost? O mas okay na mag-Network Engr muna ako since yun talaga yung interest ko, tapos tsaka na lang mag-isip kung mag-dedevops ako in the future?

​Hirap mag-decide baka kasi ma-miss out ko yung opportunity, pero ayaw ko rin namang ma-burnout sa trabahong 'di ko gusto. Ano tingin niyo? Salamat!

Guys, pa-help naman. Medyo magulo isip ko ngayon regarding sa career move ko.

​Helpdesk Engineer ako for 1 year na. Bale by June, lipat na dapat ako sa Tech Ops as Network Engineer—as in settled na dapat 'to. Kaso, naging close ko yung Software Engr Manager namin, tapos nabanggit niya na naghahanap sila ng internal hire for DevOps galing sa Helpdesk. Sabi niya okay lang kahit zero experience basta internal.

​Honestly, hindi ko naman "dream job" yung DevOps. Alam ko malaki sahod dun, pero mas leaning talaga ako sa Networking. Ang iniisip ko lang, baka manghinayang ako sa opportunity or sa potential salary growth kung tatanggihan ko yung DevOps offer.

​On the other hand, yung Network Engr role, andyan na sa harap ko at gusto ko talaga yung ginagawa dun.

​Worth it ba na subukan yung DevOps kahit 'di ko naman passion just for the career boost? O mas okay na mag-Network Engr muna ako since yun talaga yung interest ko, tapos tsaka na lang mag-isip kung mag-dedevops ako in the future?

​Hirap mag-decide baka kasi ma-miss out ko yung opportunity, pero ayaw ko rin namang ma-burnout sa trabahong 'di ko gusto. Ano tingin niyo? Salamat!

Need honest opinion.

Currently 1 year pa lang ako as Helpdesk Engineer and approved na internal movement ko to Network Engineer. Wala pa akong CCNA, kaya iniisip ko kung tama ba na lumipat na agad ako now for career growth, or mas okay sana kung nag stay muna ako sa Helpdesk since malaki chance ko ma-promote as Specialist, and sooner or later possible maging Team Lead or Assistant Manager sa department.

Medyo napapaisip din ako kasi nalungkot senior manager at manager ko sa paglipat ko, which I really appreciate.

Kayo ba, mas pipiliin niyo ba yung promotion path sa current department or lilipat agad sa mas aligned na role kahit maaga pa?