u/eviljanie

Before i start, i am not diagnosed with an eating disorder but i am 100% sure i do have anorexia and bulimia. Since age 8 i have been starving to lose weight due to relentless bullying. Ive never been overweight but average and not skinny. For about 2 years now its been at its peak. I gained a bunch of weight from steroids for a disease, so my weight fluctuates pretty frequently. If im not starving, the food i eat has to be EXACTLY on my terms. (If my mum orders it and not me i cry and scream.) i dont know why im like this. She knows i starve and probably has realised i purge. I get no help whatsoever. She even praises me sometimes and says “idk how u do it!”. Its not even healthy food i order it is junk food because i feel like if i eat someone low cal them it doesnt even matter and i might as well not eat at all.

Hi, for about 3 years now i have been relying on people entirely. When im not, i feel empty. I cant hold hobbies for some reason, and ive decided i want to stop being so emotionally dependent on my boyfriend. But i have no clue how, i want to tell him every little thing about my day but he doesn’t care, when i dont, i feel bad. When i do and he doesn’t answer, i feel even worse. I really want to just become a better person and a person i like (not clingy, annoying etc.) any advice is greatly appreciated!

I love my boyfriend more than anything. I dont know what i would do without him, but sometimes he just doesn’t want to do things with me. Which really upsets me because id do anything for him at any time of the day, today i was really exhausted and low on sleep but the day before he said we would do something so i got ready, asked if he was going out and he said no. Now i feel as if my whole day is ruined. I dont have any hobbies and i have tried before but nothing interests me. I just cant understand why he doesn’t want to do things with me? I get being alone is nice but he could have his own time when he comes back? I just dont get it. It makes me so upset and want to do something stupid for attention.

when i was around 10 i discovered about sex and told my childhood best friend about it. From then, she obsessed over it. For reference we were both very mature, we were dating at the time and acted like adults. She would constantly ask to watch porn and say she wouldn’t come over if I didn’t watch it. One night, when we were 11, i was asleep when she started groping me. I remember i was half asleep and very scared. I didnt say stop or anything at all because i didnt want to embarrass her and i was scared she’d ghost me afterwards. The next morning i remember feeling so dissociative and confused, i didnt realise it was sa until last year. I am 14 now, and this childhood friend and i havent spoken in a while since she broke contact which still affects me to this day. I just feel like i cant be mad at her but how can i not when something like this affects me daily?

I was having a very shit day after school (my mum couldnt pick me up so i had to walk home by myself for 40 mins in the rain). On the way back these older people by about a year turned around and giggled. Im slightly alternative and have dyed hair and bold makeup, and different style than my peers, so i thought nothing much of it since im used to it. But then when i overtook them they started throwing trash at me, and one boy was trying to put a plant on me so he came up behind me and touched my back so i turned around and lost it at them, saying that i didnt even know them and that i dont want shit thrown at me especially from dickheads like yous. Of course the girls were like oh no it was just the boys as if they werent giggling aswell. I basically shouldnt of said anything because i let my emotions get the best of me. Nevertheless, why is everyone so mean? Im very polite and respectful to everyone no matter what, yet everyone seems to disregard me completely?

Im 14female and i recently drank alot of vodka (yesterday.) i barely remember alot, but i remember tryjng to walk to my bfs school and then not being able to stand up and my phone was dead. I went to his house and opened the door and collapsed and started screaming and crying. He phoned my mum and took me outside, where alot of his neighbours tried to help me, one of the neighbours was my boyfriends friend who hates me because im alternative. He saw everything. I said so much shit to people on the streets asking for help etc. i struggle with self esteem and all i can think about is me on the floor looking ugly. My boyfriend doesn’t seem to care about me, refusing to see me today. My whole family knows what happened, as they took care of me. I am so ashamed and embarrassed. I dont know what to do, i feel like my boyfriend hates me. Its making me really anxious and depressed. I dont know what to do anymore