u/Sulphur_Collective

We're a highly complex system, we have 2 main systems, several smaller mini systems, several nebulas and hundreds of fragments and underdeveloped alters. We've been using obsidian to track it, it's been great fiddling with a template I found but I've been so brainfoggy since starring to do more logging. Our structures and innerworld barely make sense since they're all just concepts and not live-in areas. Our layers and government is so difficult to discern as well, especially due to how much trauma we've stacked without any time to safely process the abuse. Our therapist has been working with us on seeking more specialized treatment and trying to work through the trauma but it's been so hard for us.

Feel free to ask for meanings if you don't know, or if you wanna know more about an identity on here

I've got a lot of issues, namely ocd, autism, agorphobia, and ptsd. I am incapable of forming meaningful relationships with peers. I struggle to understand others true intentions, I just want to be normal or understand others. I'm smart for my age, I have strong morals, capacity for empathy and emotional intelligence. Yet I'm just too tired and mentally damaged to live up to any of my potential. I wish I was born normal, to a normal family. I was abused my entire childhood, I've experienced most forms of abuse too. I won't go in depth with that, but to put it simply, it makes complete sense that I have all of the issues that I do. In fact, it's a surprise I haven't ended up worse.

My sister has given me hope that my only safe space can be remedied, that my room doesn't have to be a hoarder hellspace. That I'm allowed nice things and a nice environment. But until then, I guess I'm stuck trying to advocate for myself and my animals (they're fine and safe dw, I just don't want them to watch me rot my life away)