u/Strange_Accident_426

I (40F) am currently going through a divorce. I have 3 daughters. My husband is emotionally, physically, and financially abusive. He would scream at me, push, grab, and choke me, wrestle me, block exits, throw things, etc. He removed me from one of our joint bank accounts that was used for groceries and clothing for the family and would not put me back on. We had another account that only my paycheck went into that I was still able to access. He has an alcohol, gambling, and a wandering eye (couldn’t say the actual word on this sub). I caught him on a dating app when we were in couples counseling. My girls witnessed a pretty bad incident of violence last April and I just couldn’t take it anymore. He moved out and we attempted to reconcile but he never changed. I filed this January.
I’m so very sad. I wanted so badly for him to turn this around. He’s already moved on to someone else. My mind also spirals and I wonder what more I could have done. We were married for 19 years and he started hurting me almost immediately after we got married. I wanted so badly to be a wife and I fear I will never have that role again.
Any encouragement out there would be appreciated.

I (40F) am currently going through a divorce. I have 3 daughters. My husband is emotionally, physically, and financially abusive. He would scream at me, push, grab, and choke me, wrestle me, block exits, throw things, etc. He removed me from one of our joint bank accounts that was used for groceries and clothing for the family and would not put me back on. We had another account that only my paycheck went into that I was still able to access. He has an alcohol, gambling, and a wandering eye (couldn’t say the actual word on this sub). I caught him on a dating app when we were in couples counseling. My girls witnessed a pretty bad incident of violence last April and I just couldn’t take it anymore. He moved out and we attempted to reconcile but he never changed. I filed this January.
I’m so very sad. I wanted so badly for him to turn this around. He’s already moved on to someone else. My mind also spirals and I wonder what more I could have done. We were married for 19 years and he started hurting me almost immediately after we got married. I wanted so badly to be a wife and I fear I will never have that role again.
Any encouragement out there would be appreciated.

Are there any men on here that are in relationships with women who were abused by their former partners? I’m (40F) healing after a 19 year abusive marriage. We’ve been separated for about a year and I officially filed in January. I’ve still got a lot of trauma. I have thought about what a date might be like but I’m afraid I guess. If you’ve been with a woman who was abused before, what was the beginning stage like? How did it progress or not progress? What are some things you had to consider or do differently with a woman like this? Was she able to heal and be a good partner to you? All other thoughts welcome.

40 (F) divorcing 41 (M) after 20 years. I have a huge wedding album, other pictures with just the two of us, my wedding ring, etc. I have the urge to just toss it all in the trash. Curious to know what others did with these items.

My daughter (12) told me a couple months ago that she thought her dad, my STBX, was either trying to date or is dating his neighbor. Problem is that he’s also been trying to get me back and telling our daughters how much he loves mom. There’s no chance I’m actually taking him back so him dating the neighbor doesn’t make a difference to me accept it’s really soon so I wish he was being more discrete. Anyway, I took my daughter over there today and she saw the lady outside and rolled her eyes in the lady’s direction. I immediately knew this must be the neighbor she was talking about. Turns out the reason she’s upset is that she thinks he’s been flirting/dating this lady for months while simultaneously trying to get back with me and telling them how much he loves and wants me. I think she feels like he’s being shady, which in a way, he kind of is. Trying to get back with their mom while also having this other lady in the mix is, I think, how she’s seeing this. Should I say something to him or just let it ride? I don’t want him to think I’m saying something because I’m jealous or something. I’m looking forward to the day he leaves me alone to be honest. I just don’t want our daughters to feel confused by his words and actions not lining up.