u/Nulitycw

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There’s this girl [F19] I’ve [M21] been talking to for a while, we live in the same dorm and we get along well, joke a lot, normal vibe

A few months back I made it pretty clear that I liked her by flirting a bit and inviting her to a date which she agreed to but ignored at the last minute, so I took it as a no and moved on from that idea

She has also said multiple times that she doesn’t want a relationship and doesn’t want anything with guys right now, so I respected that and stopped pushing anything

What I didn’t expect is that she started reacting to it She began asking why I’m more dry, saying I’ve changed, pointing it out multiple times, she still texts me herself and keeps the conversation going

She also says things like she’s attracted to “narcissists and manipulators”, occasionally calls me a narcissist and a manipulator, and tells me to be careful and think about my behavior, cuz its her weakness

Recently she even asked when I’m going to invite her over, on top of that she pays attention to my mood and asks questions if I seem off

Also for context, on my birthday she gave me a drawing of herself which is 18+ and don't know if I can say it here but you guys get the point and it made things feel even more mixed

So from my side I’m not trying to push anything, I already accepted that she said she doesn’t want a relationship, I’m just confused by the mismatch between what she says and how she acts

It feels like she doesn’t want anything serious but also doesn’t want me to fully pull away either

I’m not trying to overthink it, just want to understand if this is normal friendship behavior or if she’s just keeping me around for attention or is she actually interested in me but scared for some reason? how can I find this out?

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There’s this girl [F19] I’ve [M21] been talking to for a while, we live in the same dorm and we get along well, joke a lot, normal vibe

A few months back I made it pretty clear that I liked her by flirting a bit and inviting her to a date which she agreed to but ignored at the last minute, so I took it as a no and moved on from that idea

She has also said multiple times that she doesn’t want a relationship and doesn’t want anything with guys right now, so I respected that and stopped pushing anything

What I didn’t expect is that she started reacting to it She began asking why I’m more dry, saying I’ve changed, pointing it out multiple times, she still texts me herself and keeps the conversation going

She also says things like she’s attracted to “narcissists and manipulators”, occasionally calls me a narcissist and a manipulator, and tells me to be careful and think about my behavior, cuz its her weakness

Recently she even asked when I’m going to invite her over, on top of that she pays attention to my mood and asks questions if I seem off

Also for context, on my birthday she gave me a drawing of herself which is 18+ and don't know if I can say it here but you guys get the point and it made things feel even more mixed

So from my side I’m not trying to push anything, I already accepted that she said she doesn’t want a relationship, I’m just confused by the mismatch between what she says and how she acts

It feels like she doesn’t want anything serious but also doesn’t want me to fully pull away either

I’m not trying to overthink it, just want to understand if this is normal friendship behavior or if she’s just keeping me around for attention or is she actually interested in me but scared for some reason? how can I find this out?

​

There’s this girl [F19] I’ve [M21] been talking to for a while, we live in the same dorm and we get along well, joke a lot, normal vibe

A few months back I made it pretty clear that I liked her by flirting a bit and inviting her to a date which she agreed to but ignored at the last minute, so I took it as a no and moved on from that idea

She has also said multiple times that she doesn’t want a relationship and doesn’t want anything with guys right now, so I respected that and stopped pushing anything

What I didn’t expect is that she started reacting to it She began asking why I’m more dry, saying I’ve changed, pointing it out multiple times, she still texts me herself and keeps the conversation going

She also says things like she’s attracted to “narcissists and manipulators”, occasionally calls me a narcissist and a manipulator, and tells me to be careful and think about my behavior, cuz its her weakness

Recently she even asked when I’m going to invite her over, on top of that she pays attention to my mood and asks questions if I seem off

Also for context, on my birthday she gave me a drawing of herself which is 18+ and don't know if I can say it here but you guys get the point and it made things feel even more mixed

So from my side I’m not trying to push anything, I already accepted that she said she doesn’t want a relationship, I’m just confused by the mismatch between what she says and how she acts

It feels like she doesn’t want anything serious but also doesn’t want me to fully pull away either

I’m not trying to overthink it, just want to understand if this is normal friendship behavior or if she’s just keeping me around for attention or is she actually interested in me but scared for some reason? how can I find this out?

tldr

Girl [F19] I [M21] used to like said she doesn’t want a relationship, so I backed off, now she’s the one keeping contact, questioning why I’m distant, teasing me (calling me a narcissist/manipulator while saying she’s attracted to that), asked to come over, and gives mixed signals, I’m not pushing anything, just trying to understand if this is normal behavior, attention-seeking, or actual interest

There’s this girl [F19] I’ve [M21] been talking to for a while, we live in the same dorm and we get along well, joke a lot, normal vibe

A few months back I made it pretty clear that I liked her by flirting a bit and inviting her to a date which she agreed to but ignored at the last minute, so I took it as a no and moved on from that idea

She has also said multiple times that she doesn’t want a relationship and doesn’t want anything with guys right now, so I respected that and stopped pushing anything

What I didn’t expect is that she started reacting to it She began asking why I’m more dry, saying I’ve changed, pointing it out multiple times, she still texts me herself and keeps the conversation going

She also says things like she’s attracted to “narcissists and manipulators”, occasionally calls me a narcissist and a manipulator, and tells me to be careful and think about my behavior, cuz its her weakness

Recently she even asked when I’m going to invite her over, on top of that she pays attention to my mood and asks questions if I seem off

Also for context, on my birthday she gave me a drawing of herself which is 18+ and don't know if I can say it here but you guys get the point and it made things feel even more mixed

So from my side I’m not trying to push anything, I already accepted that she said she doesn’t want a relationship, I’m just confused by the mismatch between what she says and how she acts

It feels like she doesn’t want anything serious but also doesn’t want me to fully pull away either

I’m not trying to overthink it, just want to understand if this is normal friendship behavior or if she’s just keeping me around for attention or is she actually interested in me but scared for some reason? how can I find this out?