there’s levels to this, it feels like shit but there’s something about waking up & going to sleep that feels awful. at least going to sleep means I don’t get to ruminate and feel the urge to text them, but sometimes I can’t even sleep lol
things ended up pretty bad I felt very frustrated because he blocked me every time things weren’t okay and chose to ignore me or to not let me talk.
we haven’t talked for 2 days but I saw he posted a photo dump (if it matters, with the song bokete from bad bunny lol) and one of the photos is from our first date, a skyline photo we both took.
and he’s been listening to an album I recommended to him a long time ago, which he loved but stopped listening to the moment he found out it was a recommendation from an old friend before I talked to him. even I couldn’t listen to that album so he wouldn’t be upset because it did make him upset. but now he’s been listening to it?
I know this is not healthy and I shouldn’t be checking his socials but it’s been so recent 😔 the last thing I told him is that he’s cruel and was terrible to me along with other things like I hope he does better and doesn’t ruin someone else like he did it with me, I feel very embarrassed because I was upset in the moment. but also I might be forgetting all the bad stuff he did and said to me? idk I’m being so weak and missing him :(
I just got out of a very toxic relationship, and I've been constantly questioning myself, feeling guilty, like everything was my fault and like the relationship took that course because of me, me and just me.
I started therapy because it's been some awful weeks mentally. My therapist made me open my eyes and realize I was in an emotionally abusive relationship, where sometimes I would wonder if I was narcissistic, or abusive, mean, toxic, I would try to really understand everything.
But it seems like my ex doesn't question himself these things? He continues to blame me, and I just wonder if these people ever think about what they did? Do they also feel guilt?
2 days ago he blocked me (something he’s been doing everytime he feels upset or sad) after I told him I’m going to therapy, he starts asking me where’d I get the money from to pay for sessions, why didnt I tell him before that I thought of going, he brought up how I couldn’t go on this day trip with him months ago because I told him I was saving my money before I had to quit my job (which he knew) but I can spend it in other things such as therapy this week or lattes every now and then. He knows i’ve been struggling with money though, he makes 5x my salary I feel likeits unfair to judge the way I spend mine when i’m not splurging, but I get how he could feel like I was spending money in other small things that could’ve added up for the day trip with him.
Anyway, I called him hours after that phone call where he argued with me and he was being very dry/mean. I started crying and said I was just looking for comfort from him, that I didn’t like his attitude and he said “you got a whole ass therapy session you can find comfort somewhere else”, “I don’t know why you calling me when you have a whole therapist”, and when he was about to hang up he said “have fun at your little therapy sessions”.
He blocked me again and the next night he calls me a bunch of times and I didn’t pick up a single call and I haven’t heard from him since then. I feel very guilty and like I should’ve maybe picked up? AIO
*TL;DR* I was crying on the phone after he blocked me, told him I was just looking for comfort from him, that I didn’t like his attitude and he said “you got a whole ass therapy session you can find comfort somewhere else”, “I don’t know why you calling me when you have a whole therapist”, and when he was about to hang up he said “have fun at your little therapy sessions”. Next day I ignored his calls
Edit: just made text shorter; he’s my ex who supposedly wanted to get back with me.
Esto pasó hace meses, ya no andamos, pero mi ex sigue sacando esta situación y me pregunto si fui culera.
Hace meses fuimos a un antro/discoteca para ver a un DJ. Fue en Estados Unidos. Cabe aclarar que el inglés no es mi primer idioma (el de mi ex si), así que a veces me cuesta entender lo que me dicen, especialmente cuando hay mucho ruido. Íbamos pasando por seguridad y el guardia me dijo que vaciara mis bolsas del pantalón, pero no entendí, así que dije “eh?” como dos veces, y luego le pregunté a mi novio qué había dicho el guardia. Vacié mis cosas del pantalón y seguí caminando, y cuando el guardia revisó a mi novio, le dijo algo como “esta medio tonta ella” (en inglés fue “she’s kind of dumb”) pero bien mamón
Él me contó todo esto a la siguiente mañana y dijo: “ayer pasó algo, te vas a enojar”. Cuando le pregunté si dijo algo, me dijo que no. Yo no esperaba que peleara ni nada, solo pensé que tal vez diría algo como “oye, no le digas así” o algo así. Me sentí triste y un poco molesta, así que estuve algo distante, pero sí le expliqué por qué y cómo me sentía. La verdad me estaba aguantando las lágrimas porque sentí feo que me llamaran tonta y no me defendiera
Mi novio se puso triste y se fue a la cama. Yo estaba en la silla y él se tapó con las cobijas. Después de unos minutos, aunque estaba en silencio, me di cuenta de que como que estaba llorando. En ese momento me bloqueé un poco por cómo me sentía, pero también porque al principio no estaba segura si estaba intentando dormir o llorando, como dije, estaba en silencio. Luego se levantó de la cama y me dijo que no podía creer que lo dejé llorando solo y que no le dije nada y estaba decepcionado. Me disculpé muchas veces y le dije que no fue mi intención no estar ahí para él. Lo abracé, le expliqué cómo me sentía, y también le dije que eso no volvería a pasar y que entendía su punto. Inclusive después de ese día seguí validando su sentir y disculpándome. En otras ocasiones el había estado triste o llegó a llorar y siempre estuve para él, eso fue algo de una vez pues.
Desde entonces sentí un cambio en su actitud, dejó de mostrar sus emociones conmigo, y cada vez que se enojaba o era frío conmigo, se justificaba sacando lo que pasó ese día. Dice cosas como “recuerdas cómo me dejaste llorando solo esa vez?”, pero de forma pasivo agresiva… y yo sigo dándole vueltas porque de verdad me siento culpable y me disculpé muchas veces, pero él nunca lo superó y siento que estoy lidiando con las consecuencias de eso. Si fui culera?
I'm talking to a guy and he's a flight attendant so I see him whenever there's a chance for him to be in my city. Met him a year ago but only seen him a couple times and we stopped talking for 6 months (I took some distance).
I'm asking if he's a red flag because it's confusing. He takes days to text back, he's extremely extroverted, he's always going out and meeting new people. Apparently his family is still close to his ex, and he likes every. single. photo. his ex posts. Sometimes he'll mention something random like "oh my ex's cat used to blah blah" "my ex's niece was so sweet".
Now, on the other hand, when he talks to me he's super attentive and sweet, he'll be checking up on me and making plans for next time he's around. I don't really trip about him lagging because I understand his job can be overwhelming and if he's traveling to all these cool places I don't think I'd be on my phone neither but I'm wondering if maybe I'm being delusional lol.
He literally kisses the ground I walk on when we talk and when we're together, he was saying that he's going to try to get me on flights with him so we can spend more time together when there's a chance. But it's sooo confusing how he disappears at times, even for 1-2 weeks. And during those weeks, I notice if his ex posts something, he likes it so he's not like away from his phone.
I met a guy last year, he's a flight attendant and I've seen him a couple times, we're sort of going with the flow but I started wondering if I could be with him like that.
He's extremely social and extroverted, he travels to different cities and countries every week basically, meets new people, every time he has a layover he goes out to party and explore the cities, he's constantly meeting new people. He grew up around a lot of family and friends, he's literally ALWAYS busy, he's very lovely and charming so he's always around people having a good time.
I'm the complete opposite. I'm introverted and a little shy but I do pass as an extrovert sometimes lol. But, I grew up as an only child with my mom, my dad was always busy with work or school. I saw the rest of my family once a year. I grew up very, very shy and I had only like 1-2 friends growing up. I had a very lonely childhood & teenage years and I spent most of my life at home. It was until college that I started having an actual social life and started going out, meeting people, dating, hanging out with friends constantly, traveling, and I really do enjoy that lifestyle, but I'm still an introvert. I need my time to recharge, I enjoy alone time, being quiet, I can't do hangouts with large groups of people, I always function better socially with small groups.
Now, this guy is very charming and romantic, very emotionally intelligent and with a great sense of humor. He describes me as someone fun, smart, lovely, and he enjoys my company, like I said I can pass as someone extroverted at times but he intimidates me. We lived life so differently I don't know if it's possible to have something. He's always hanging out with people and I'm always at home or doing my own things, I see friends maybe once every two weeks.