u/GirlWhoLikesFries

i book my tickets months in advance specifically to get a side lower berth. but literally every single time i board the train, there is an uncle or aunty already sitting on my seat, fully settled in, waiting to ask me to swap for their middle or upper berth.

i get that we should respect elders. but i planned ahead because i just want to look out the window and sleep in peace. plus i have horrible back pain from my desk job and climbing up is a nightmare. today i finally mustered the courage to say no politely to this family, and the sheer amount of guilt tripping and death stares i got was insane. they spent the next few hours loudly complaining to each other about how today's generation has zero respect and no manners.

why do people book upper berths knowing they cant climb them and just assume some young person traveling alone will adjust for them?

how do you guys deal with this without starting a massive argument? am i actually the villain here or does everyone go through this?

Throwaway account. Names have been changed.

I (22M) have been friends with John (22M) for 1.5 years, he isn't my best friend but we are close. John has been friends with Alice (22F) for 7 years. Alice moved to our city last year, that's when I became friends with her, through John. We three hung out a lot together for 3 months.

I developed a strong crush on Alice during those 3 months. I did not know at that point that John liked her too. At some point John told me he did like her few years back, but not currently.

But later after those 3 months, they eventually started dating, and John then told me he liked her all along. Just before the start of their dating, John had asked me if I had started liking Alice too, I denied that as I knew they are about to start dating, knowing it would make everything awkward if I told the truth.

They dated for 6 months, but then John broke up with Alice. John told me it was due to "incompatibility", he didn't think it was sustainable, and he thought better to end it early than later as Alice might be more hurt if he did it after dating for longer. But he also told me many times how it might take a lot of time for him to move on from Alice, he still thinks of her and all.

It's been 2 months since the breakup, Alice completely hates John and they don't talk to each other and maybe never will. I am still good friends with both.

My crush on Alice was suppressed during the time they dated. But I have sort of redeveloped it recently, knowing they are not dating anymore. I am not sure what Alice thinks about me yet, I am unsure if I should even ask out Alice in future. Alice and I always have had a great vibe together from what I feel.

If I ever consider asking Alice out in future, I will definitely tell John first. Currently, John doesn't know about my crush on Alice at all.

Am I wrong for wanting to ask out my friend's ex in this scenario?

Throwaway account. Names have been changed.

I (22M) have been friends with John (22M) for 1.5 years, he isn't my best friend but we are close. John has been friends with Alice (22F) for 7 years. Alice moved to our city last year, that's when I became friends with her, through John. We three hung out a lot together for 3 months.

I developed a strong crush on Alice during those 3 months. I did not know at that point that John liked her too. At some point John told me he did like her few years back, but not currently.

But later after those 3 months, they eventually started dating, and John then told me he liked her all along. Just before the start of their dating, John had asked me if I had started liking Alice too, I denied that as I knew they are about to start dating, knowing it would make everything awkward if I told the truth.

They dated for 6 months, but then John broke up with Alice. John told me it was due to "incompatibility", he didn't think it was sustainable, and he thought better to end it early than later as Alice might be more hurt if he did it after dating for longer. But he also told me many times how it might take a lot of time for him to move on from Alice, he still thinks of her and all.

It's been 2 months since the breakup, Alice completely hates John and they don't talk to each other and maybe never will. I am still good friends with both.

My crush on Alice was suppressed during the time they dated. But I have sort of redeveloped it recently, knowing they are not dating anymore. I am not sure what Alice thinks about me yet, I am unsure if I should even ask out Alice in future. Alice and I always have had a great vibe together from what I feel.

If I ever consider asking Alice out in future, I will definitely tell John first. Currently, John doesn't know about my crush on Alice at all.

Am I wrong for wanting to ask out my friend's ex in this scenario?

Throwaway account. Names have been changed.

I (25M) have been friends with John (24M) for 1.5 years, he isn't my best friend but we are close. John has been friends with Alice (24F) for 7 years. Alice moved to our city last year, that's when I became friends with her, through John. We three hung out a lot together for 3 months.

I developed a strong crush on Alice during those 3 months. I did not know at that point that John liked her too. At some point John told me he did like her few years back, but not currently.

But later after those 3 months, they eventually started dating, and John then told me he liked her all along. Just before the start of their dating, John had asked me if I had started liking Alice too, I denied that as I knew they are about to start dating, knowing it would make everything awkward if I told the truth.

They dated for 6 months, but then John broke up with Alice. John told me it was due to "incompatibility", he didn't think it was sustainable, and he thought better to end it early than later as Alice might be more hurt if he did it after dating for longer. But he also told me many times how it might take a lot of time for him to move on from Alice, he still thinks of her and all.

It's been 2 months since the breakup, Alice completely hates John and they don't talk to each other and maybe never will. I am still good friends with both.

My crush on Alice was suppressed during the time they dated. But I have sort of redeveloped it recently, knowing they are not dating anymore. I am not sure what Alice thinks about me yet, I am unsure if I should even ask out Alice in future. Alice and I always have had a great vibe together from what I feel.

If I ever consider asking Alice out in future, I will definitely tell John first. Currently, John doesn't know about my crush on Alice at all.

Am I wrong for wanting to ask out my friend's ex in this scenario?