u/External-Tangelo3523

I’m (M25) in my first relationship (LDR) since 6 months.

I was clear from the start that I wanted a partner who was a virgin and had no children. Two months in, she confessed she had been in a 10-year relationship and has two kids. She recently moved out and lives alone with them now.

​When we started, I wanted to marry her. Since the confession, I’ve mentally checked out and I'm heartbroken. I told her honestly that she doesn't fit my life anymore and that I’m only staying until I find a new partner.

​Despite this, she is obsessed. She says she "hopes I’ll change my mind" and stay forever. She refuses to accept the breakup. Every time I try to go, she cries hysterically and spams me with hundreds of calls and messages until I cave. I’ve come back multiple times because I’m deeply attached and the "withdrawal" feels like an addiction I can't beat.

​​I feel like a terrible person for staying while looking for someone else, but I feel paralyzed by the attachment and her reactions. How do I find the strength to leave for good when I’m this attached to the connection with her, even though I know I'm destroying myself mentally?

Fyi, I'm too attached to her.

Tldr: same as title

reddit.com
u/External-Tangelo3523 — 12 days ago

I’m (M25) in my first relationship (LDR) since 6 months.

I was clear from the start that I wanted a partner who was a virgin and had no children. Two months in, she confessed she had been in a 10-year relationship and has two kids. She recently moved out and lives alone with them now.

​When we started, I wanted to marry her. Since the confession, I’ve mentally checked out and I'm heartbroken. I told her honestly that she doesn't fit my life anymore and that I’m only staying until I find a new partner.

​Despite this, she is obsessed. She says she "hopes I’ll change my mind" and stay forever. She refuses to accept the breakup. Every time I try to go, she cries hysterically and spams me with hundreds of calls and messages until I cave. I’ve come back multiple times because I’m deeply attached and the "withdrawal" feels like an addiction I can't beat.

​​I feel like a terrible person for staying while looking for someone else, but I feel paralyzed by the attachment and her reactions. How do I find the strength to leave for good when I’m this attached to the connection with her, even though I know I'm destroying myself mentally?

Fyi, I'm too attached to her

reddit.com
u/External-Tangelo3523 — 12 days ago

​

I’m (M25) in my first relationship (LDR) since 6 months.

I was clear from the start that I wanted a partner who was a virgin and had no children. Two months in, she confessed she had been in a 10-year relationship and has two kids. She recently moved out and lives alone with them now.

​When we started, I wanted to marry her. Since the confession, I’ve mentally checked out and I'm heartbroken. I told her honestly that she doesn't fit my life anymore and that I’m only staying until I find a new partner.

​Despite this, she is obsessed. She says she "hopes I’ll change my mind" and stay forever. She refuses to accept the breakup. Every time I try to go, she cries hysterically and spams me with hundreds of calls and messages until I cave. I’ve come back multiple times because I’m deeply attached and the "withdrawal" feels like an addiction I can't beat.

​​I feel like a terrible person for staying while looking for someone else, but I feel paralyzed by the attachment and her reactions. How do I find the strength to leave for good when I’m this attached to the connection with her, even though I know I'm destroying myself mentally?

Fyi, I'm too attached to her

reddit.com
u/External-Tangelo3523 — 12 days ago

​

I’m (M25) in my first relationship (LDR) since 6 months.

I was clear from the start that I wanted a partner who was a virgin and had no children. Two months in, she confessed she had been in a 10-year relationship and has two kids. She recently moved out and lives alone with them now.

​When we started, I wanted to marry her. Since the confession, I’ve mentally checked out and I'm heartbroken. I told her honestly that she doesn't fit my life anymore and that I’m only staying until I find a new partner.

​Despite this, she is obsessed. She says she "hopes I’ll change my mind" and stay forever. She refuses to accept the breakup. Every time I try to go, she cries hysterically and spams me with hundreds of calls and messages until I cave. I’ve come back multiple times because I’m deeply attached and the "withdrawal" feels like an addiction I can't beat.

​​I feel like a terrible person for staying while looking for someone else, but I feel paralyzed by the attachment and her reactions. How do I find the strength to leave for good when I’m this attached to the connection with her, even though I know I'm destroying myself mentally?

Fyi, I'm too attached to her

reddit.com
u/External-Tangelo3523 — 12 days ago