I need advice regarding a friend of mine.
TL;DR; So I just turned 18, and I’ve been talking to this guy for about six months now. I’m going to keep things a bit vague because he’s somewhat known in the field we’re both involved in, and people could recognize him if I gave too many details.
He’s 34 and works in a position above me in the same industry I’m trying to build a career in (it's a sport). When we first started talking, it was completely professional, we would message occasionally about work-related things. But over time, he started reaching out more and more, and now we talk every day.
What’s making me really uncomfortable is that he’s been in a long-term relationship, and he literally just had a baby less than a month ago. He also posts a lot of pictures with his wife, like a happy family, which honestly makes me feel even worse about the whole situation.
Since I turned 18, his behavior toward me has shifted in a way that doesn’t feel professional anymore. He texts me constantly, calls me pretty, and sends me pictures of himself. At first I tried to brush it off because maybe that alone wouldn’t be that weird, but it’s the frequency and the context that’s starting to get to me. It’s happening every single day, and it feels more and more inappropriate.
The thing that really crossed the line for me was when he sent me a porn video, saying a friend had sent it to him but I genuinely don’t understand why he would then send it to me. After that, he also sent me a TikTok that said “send nudes” and then quickly said it was just a joke, but it didn’t feel like a joke at all. It felt like he was testing how far he could go.
At this point I just feel really uncomfortable, and honestly kind of disgusted. The fact that he just became a father and is acting like this makes it feel even worse to me.
The situation is complicated because people I work with, including my coaches, really look up to him and expect me to collaborate with him again to help promote our academy. They literally freaked out when they found out I know the guy when they've been following him for years... So I feel a lot of pressure to stay on good terms and not create problems professionally, even though this is making me feel really uneasy.
I guess I’m just confused and stressed about what to do. Is this as inappropriate as it feels to me? And how do I handle this situation without hurting my chances in the industry?