u/Cute_Stay9640

Hi! I need some advice on whether my insecurities are getting the best of me or this situation is just a disaster waiting to happen. This relationship is new.

Like the title says my 35 year old bf has a 22 year old female roommate. I initially thought the age gap itself was a red flag. And after meeting her and knowing more about their dynamic I feel even more weird. I’ll give a list of details of their dynamic that makes me feel weird just to sum it up.

-They watch a movie together every night. And it doesn’t matter if I am there. He never cancels on her and we’ve never watched a movie just the two of us. (They don’t have tv’s in their bedrooms)

-They are super close. He has 12 different nicknames for her. They do a lot of activities together. They have a lot of the same hobbies and are more similar than him and I are. And they just know everything about each other

-They make very strong eye contact when talking and will sometimes just stare at each other.

-They have a very “teasy” friendship and sometimes I feel like the 3rd wheel during movies because they have so many inside jokes and half the time and I don’t even understand what they’re talking about.

-Also if we’re out late on a date he almost seems anxious to get back home to watch a movie with his roommate.

-He brings her up A LOT.

I’ve been cheated on a lot in the past and I do have trust issues. I’m not sure if I’m being unreasonable with this situation. I have brought it up before about how I’m a bit uncomfortable with it. And he’s just said “I think it’s healthy to have opposite sex friendships” and I fully agree to that. I don’t feel weird about any of his other female friends. But the roommate puts a knot in my stomach. I do really like him. I wish he could see how weird the dynamic is. They’re like bestfriends and I don’t want to put a wedge in their friendship if I’m just being insecure. I haven’t said much else about it except that one time and I just need some help. Would anyone else be uncomfortable in this situation?

UPDATE: I broke up with him so he can be with his wife in peace 😭

Was seeing this amazing guy for 2 months. The chemistry was off the charts and it was just such a good time and he treated me with such respect and made me feel seen. But he wanted to move. Not sure if that’s the actual reason he ended things but ngl I was in love with him. We ended things in December and I still cry every other day about it. Wish I could move on. I started a business discovering I was really good at a new hobby. Business is going well so theres that l!! I would do anything to get him back but I know that won’t happen. Idk if he even moved yet but I can’t let go.