u/Beneficial-Corgi-288

I don't want to spend most of my waking hours at a job just so that I can pay the bills to continue living a life I don't even get joy from. All while society is collapsing all around me.

I'm so bored of being alive. It's so dull that it's painful. There's nothing worth filling my outside of work hours with. I don't like myself, I don't like my life, and I'm so tired of doing the grind every day just to get absolutely nothing out of it. I come home from work and cry until my head hurts a lot of the time. I have no goals or hobbies that I'm passionate about. I'm just passing the time and waiting until I can go to sleep. I wish I had something to care about, but I just feel empty.

I have no idea how people without depression enjoy any of this. Being alive feels like eating cardboard every day. It all just sucks and I'm so tired.

A while ago I planned a weekend overnight trip with my friend. However, I'm incredibly stressed out right now because I'm getting ready to move back to my home country. It's been really hard both in terms of logistics but also emotionally as I'm saying goodbye to my current life forever. I've been having lots of chest pain and crying a lot and my patience with others is basically 0. I feel like a volcano on the verge of erupting.

It maybe wasn't a great idea to plan "one last trip," but it's too late to back out now. Are there any strategies I can do to calm myself down in my head so that it doesn't show visibly? I'm worried that I'm going to make it a bad trip by saying something mean and I really don't want to.

I've been ugly my entire life. When I was in middle school, boys used to dare each other to ask me out as a joke. I was so ugly that the thought of someone wanting to date me was funny to them.

Now that I'm an adult, people aren't childishly mean anymore, but I'm basically invisible. I never get the attention some other girls get. If I go somewhere with friends, everyone will talk to my pretty friends but not me.

I'm so jealous of other women I know. They can go on dates and people are nicer to them. I don't think I could ever find a relationship because even if someone gave me a chance, I think someone seeing my body without clothes would make them change their mind. At best, someone would settle for me, but I'd never be the love of their life.

And even if I ignored what everyone else thought about me, I still can't like myself. When I see my body in a bathroom mirror, it makes me so sad. I have an apple shape that makes me look like an eraser with toothpick legs. One of my ears sticks out more than the other and I have weird baby hands. I'm nearing 25 and I still get acne like a teenager. Sometimes I'm having an okay day, but then I see myself and it ruins it. Even if I wear an outfit that looks cute in my head, it looks bad on me. I think I would be really into fashion if I didn't look this way.

I wish I could wake up and be in another body. Anything but this one.

I'm considering getting the bergamote 22 shampoo because I really liked the perfume sample I tried, but I don't think I want to commit to a bottle right now. The shampoo is like half the price of the 15ml bottle, so I'm considering doing that instead. But does the scent last a decent amount of time on your hair? Or does it basically wash out right away after you rinse your hair out? I'm curious if anyone has tried these shampoos and what you think about them.

I'm going to school to be a teacher, but I'm a little worried about the fact that I'm gay causing problems. I've been a teaching assistant for a while and it's never been an issue because I've always been single, but now that I'm making a big leap into the education field by going to graduate school, I'm starting to get nervous about what my future will look like if I ever get married.

Sure, I can avoid wearing a wedding ring and never bring it up, but I fear what might happen if someone sees me in public with my hypothetical future spouse. Or if someone from my personal life accidently tells someone they shouldn't (I love my parents, but they have accidently outed me to many people). I'm worried that students' parents will ask to have their kids removed from my class or worse, that it might be a reason why I get non renewed before I can get tenured.

I'm from the Cleveland area which is fairly progressive, but still not everyone is accepting. Am I totally worried over nothing, or do things like this still happen often in 2026?

I have hobbies, I've lived abroad, I've learned how to speak another language, I'm going to start a master's degree soon, I'm going to go hang out with my friends later today. I'm doing all the things that people tell me to fill my time with to "be happy single." Sure those things keep me busy, but they don't fill the specific void in my heart.

I can have fun all day, but at the end of the day when I'm lying in my bed, I'm still going to think about how I wish I too could feel that butterflies in your stomach feeling that everyone else gets to feel. I'm still going to wish that someone thought I looked beautiful in my favorite dress. I'm still going to feel broken because most people my age are dating someone or married and I'm not. I'm still going to be upset when my parents ask me why I'm still single.

It doesn't matter how I spend my time, that piece of my life is still missing and I can't just shove some more hobbies in there to make it better.

I'm so tired of hearing about the newest war or how people today are lonelier than ever or the 10,000 new ways that the environment is being destroyed every day. I'm tired of living in a world where all anyone cares about is money. Humanity is so evil and selfish. The world is collapsing so there's no point in caring about anything.

My antidepressants aren't enough to fix it. It's too big of a problem to fix on an individual level. I can't be okay if my environment is constant cruelty and injustice and destruction.

I never asked to be born into this. I often wish that I wasn't. Most people seem to handle it just fine, but I can't. It's too much for me.