r/romantasycirclejerk

✨ Hi fellow book lovers ✨ Has anyone ever had that specific feeling of 'I'd totally read a book with this plot' only to realize it doesn't exist because I haven't written it yet -I mean, because no one has? 🥹😭😭 I'm looking for any 'random' ideas because I'm totally curious!! Are there stories, complex magic systems, or specific spicy tropes you feel really need to be written?? Drop your most detailed ideas below, even the weird ones! Especially the ones with high commercial potential!! I'd love to see what kind of books you wish existed so I can... uh... appreciate your creativity. Please include world-building maps and character arcs if possible. For science!!

In 2013, in a haunted cemetery, a small fluffy dummy ran screaming at me from a hedge. Without preamble (other than the screaming) he climbed up my body and into my arms, where he promptly shut up. I was in a bit of a folklore kick at the time and named him Tam Lin.

Those first years were perfect. Timtam lived up to his name: constantly falling off horses, appearing out of nowhere, forever needing to be rescued, and being generally useless to any and all Janets (I once watched him clock a live mouse in the house, then pointedly lie down with his back to it. Another time, he burned his paw on a candle flame, looked at his paw with bewilderment, then touched the flame again. He did that twice before I realized he would keep going unless I stopped him.)

So imagine how devastating it was for me 3 years later to come across two supposed books about Timbletam. What a lie ACOTAR was! Where is the shape shifting? Where is my beloved, Pro-Choice Janet, throwing her boyfriend down a well? Feyre could never.

But worst of all was the character assassination? Tambulance was not a reticent blonde (ew) hereditary ruler that complained ab the system but refused to pass any reforms. He was a fluffy, anti-monarchical tuxedo baby (handsome despite an ill-advised soulpatch) who toppled anything he didn't like. If he needed you to know something, he screamed until you figured it out. He would never have collaborated with the clergy. He would never have fiddled (real Tams are bongos, don't @ me). He would never have sat quietly next to a woman who forced him to wear a costume! He certainly never let anyone hang out in the bathroom alone.

And let me tell you, if a self-righteous illiterate child left my boy for a 1%er white-savior bat, he would've just re-upped his rabies vax and called it a day.

The only things the real Mr. TL Business, Esq. shared in common with that book man were that:

1)he wasn't nearly as horny as everyone makes him out to be

2. he liked shoving things into bathtubs

3. he did love a border patrol (right legs on the fence rail, left legs on the pickets, high/low style, god he was so weird and dumb)

You can't even imagine the embarrassment and pain of having to explain to vet techs and new friends and baristas and gas leak inspectors that SJM stole my baby name. I came up with the idea of using an existing name as a name first. Plus, if I had been going to name my cat after porn, I would have chosen actual porn like Mr. Popper's Penguins or The Wapentake of Wirral: A History of the Royal Franchise of the Hundred and Hundred Court of Wirral in Cheshire.

There's no way it was a coincidence that my best boy left us in September 2023, the same month SJM confirmed she was working on ACOTAR 6.

Anyway, I need book recs with an aloof MMC with really healthy kidneys where the vibe is neither cat murder nor manorialism.

Why do authors want to write things that will sell, guys? Is it the patriarchy? Do teenagers even read books? I don't know any teenagers so I will make broad assumptions about what they like, which is NOT READING.

Hey, Upper East Snarkers! Gossip Numbers here. Your one and only source into the scandalous lives of the RCJ elite.

Spotted: One Ms. Remington Rivers hiding in the shrubbery at Versailles because she still hasn’t completed the German Fourth Wing buddy read she promised Wild Arugula that she’d do months ago. Arugula followed through, but Rem Rem just couldn’t bring it to completion. What’s she doing instead? Literally anything and everything. Word on the street is that she’s traded German for French. She was last seen fleeing Paris by high speed rail because the ghosts of promises past were getting too close for comfort.

You can run but you can’t hide, Remy. Every train arrives at its destination eventually.

As for me, I’m definitely not in France right now. Who am I? That’s one secret I’ll never tell.

💋

XOXO,

Gossip Numbers

...and it made me thing of y'all on r/romantasycirclejerk

Have a great weekend!

(PS. not spamming. Not even going to tell you the title so it's not self-promo!)

He towered above her, at least thirty feet of malign divinity. The remaining sounds of combat clattered to a halt as all the survivors looked on in awe and terror at the form occupying the centre of the temple. He was largely the same shape as depicted in the statue, but no mason could do justice to the dark, twisted reality of Him. His flesh was a sort of mottled green and black, glistening with a coating of some sort of transparent slime. He seemed thicker, fatter, more muscular than in sculpture, and the detail of his face, the maliciousness, the pure evil...no, the impure evil! Everything about Him was twisted, wrong, unnatural, hideous, and yet...at least to Arissa...so, so sensual, so...darkly desirable.

Her whole body was tingling, throbbing with a deep unholy lust just to look upon Him. And best of all, of course, surmounting his forwards-thrust hips...the enormous, swollen penis and testicles that she herself had helped to sculpt. The sheer male potency of them, the dark aroma of lasciviousness that they gave off...although of course they were far too large to ever possibly enter her, she couldn't help being drawn to them like a moth to a flame. To her, that mighty divine rod was the ultimate lure, the final object of all her desire, and somehow she had to have it! Even in its unwakened state, as it was now, it possessed a certain thick, rubbery turgidity to it, but she could sense it was slowly arousing itself, the bulbous glans just beginning to stretch at the thickly veined foreskin, the whole structure starting to arise. She had to see just how big He could become when fully excited. The prospect of it took her breath away.

It ain’t a dig at them, y’all, I’m just sharing an experience. I’m glad they’ve reached this success!

Do y’all feel like they’re trying just a tad too hard to be the OG numbers? I saw someone say this somewhere and thought it was very fitting. What are y’all’s thoughts, feeling about that? Are you a fan who loves to theorize or just follow the theories? Are you annoyed? Do you feel like it’s too much? Do you think they’re doing it well. It’s all up for a discussion!

For context, my request here stems from my recent read of someone else’s post, and to a lesser extent, my fanfic WIP. I'm looking for any recs that have multiple bullies that eventually have conflict/fight with one another over the FMC, or at a minimum, she ignores the seemingly obvious bad boy love interest and gets together with a girl.

I'm cool with poly, reverse harem, etc. I've been diving into romantasy and loving it, but contemporary is fine too. Many thanks!

It ain’t a dig at the woman, y’all, I’m just sharing an experience. I’m glad she’s reached this success!

Do y’all feel like she’s trying just a tad too hard to be Taylor Swift? I saw someone say this somewhere and thought it was very fitting. What are y’all’s thoughts, feeling about that? Are you a fan who loves to theorize or just follow the theories? Are you annoyed? Do you feel like it’s too much? Do you think she’s doing it well. It’s all up for a discussion!

I need all the recs you have of “X species” MMC falling in love with “A species” of FMC.

There aren’t really any, but I’m going to keep asking and if you suggest a “Y species” of MMC falling in love with “A species” of FMC, I’m not going to be polite, but I’m going to comment and get angry that that is specifically not what I was asking for.

And in no way, is anyone to suggest that this is a fetish or kink of any kind. Like ew gross. 5 spice only please!

Is this the right flair? I don't know.

Due to the banning of Fight Me Friday 🪦, I'm hosting the first ever DTF.

The statement: Misery Lark is a fucking Queen.

Agree? Disagree? Let's go. I want brawling in the comments. I want bloodshed and tears. I want mayhem and carnage.

Supporting evidence:

1. She's surly, pale and doesn't like the sun.
2. She sleeps in a closet.
3. She has the kind of bored internal monologue that I want my actual voice to sound like.
4. She's basically April Ludgate in vampire form.
5. Her maternal instincts give me something to strive for.

She's not the over-powered Chosen One that I've read at least 300000 times.

>Misery Lark? No need to be careful. She’s not particularly dangerous, so feel free to cross her. What is she gonna do? Chuck her lint roller at you?

Why can’t my ladies be morally gray?? I’m tired of the same edgy secret heart of gold male characters. They’re so boring and the FMC always has to be so sweet and soothing to them. I want a FMC that EATS people and slurps down their arteries like noodles. I need a reprehensible bitch. I want the MMC to piss his pants when he figures out what type of eldritch monster is sleeping in his bed. Rant over

Uj/ I am soooo close to writing my own cringe novel just to get my fix of evil women

I am absolutely confused over the order in which I should read the series for the upcoming release of #6. So far I’ve only read the first four books and I have no clue what to continue with😭😵‍💫. Should I read 5 and then 6 and then 7?

I'm so confused.