r/BenignExistence

Every time I say this people rush to correct me, like I’ve said something incredibly self deprecating but I genuinely do not see that as the case. If people can be extraordinary at anything, it stands to reason that people should be able to be mediocre at things. I love being mediocre!!!!!

I paint. I’m not great, but not terrible, I can paint a pretty landscape and put the colours where I want them. I’m also pretty good at drawing, not the best but definitely good enough for my purposes. I’m not an illustrator but people say nice things when they glance over my shoulder at what I do!

I’m an average student. Not top of the class, not bottom, but always good enough that I pass but with enough to improve on that I never get bored. I’m alright at work, too, I’m not some kind of prodigy but I work in a hospital and patients thank me :)

I’m alright at writing!! I have a little webseries I write, I think it’s a bit cringey at times, people like it, and I like writing it. I probably wouldn’t be so good as an author but hey, I don’t want to be an author.

I have a physical disability, so a lot of sports are off the table, but not all!! My climbing gym has 10 route difficulties, and I’ve been hovering around the 5th one for a while. I can’t throw myself up a wall in 4 seconds flat, but I have lots of fun and I always smile when I leave.

I can cook well enough that I make myself happy. I can’t dance but I do jump up and down with my friends. I can’t sing but I know all the words to my favourite songs. My dexterity isn’t great but I can play some riffs from my favourite songs on the piano.

Passion always beats talent, so I don’t need to worry that I’m not naturally talented at anything. I can work at anything to get better. I’ll never be world-class but I’m pretty camera shy so that’s probably better for everyone. And I never get bored!! :D

Jack of all trades, better than none, but I’m happier than if I was just a jack of one :]

My husband's cat Hobbes (yes he is a large scruffy fluffy orange tomcat named after a certain tiger) is a 'feral' rescue. He was a neighborhood cat that had been living outside our house since was a kitten. Hubby chucked him inside one day and he's very slowly become a housecat.

He has recently been playing with toys, hanging out in the living room with the family instead of the bedroom, and is currently laying on the arm of the couch and my head. We're just proud of him and he seems really happy.

Had about a half hour wait for my train home from Norwich this evening so I treated myself to some saveloy and chips to pass the time. Whilst walking to the station, and elderly lady passing by asked: "excuse me how are those chips?"

"Really good honestly! Only £4.90 with a regular saveloy too!"

"Ooh, are they hot or warm?"

"Warm I'd say, not hot hot but for £4.90 I ain't complaining haha"

"Right I'm off to treat myself then, thank you enjoy your evening!"

"Anytime you too!"

I really love random little interactions like this, they're so human. I'm from a town where people aren't the most social so I always love going somewhere with chatty people.

Edit: Today I've learned from this thread that "whilst" doesn't seem to be used much in American English, I find weirdly fascinating since its an everyday word for me

Stepped out on the back porch last night for a smoke before bed... And watched an almost cartoonishly fluffy black cat walk across my backyard like they owned the place. Looked neither left, nor right, nor at me... Just straight across the yard and into the darkness of the neighbor's yard beyond the reach of my porch light.

The other night I was lying in bed, looking at my phone (Reddit probably), and kitty was under the covers beside me sleeping. He was the "little spoon" in position but in actual fact he's a very long cat who can stand and look over the dining table easily.

In his sleep, he stretched out, and one front paw extended out from under the covers with all his long spidermonkey toes spread wide... collided gently and closed around my nose (no scratches even) and then withdrew back under the covers.

It felt so loving and intentional!

• Bye bye!

• Ricky is going to the school sandpit.

• Ricky is home!

• Ricky tipped some sand.

• Ricky didn't bring a book.

• Ricky will have Squirtle when Ricky goes to work.

• Mummy! Do you know what Squirtle likes to eat?

• When Ricky said 'May I' Ricky did have a grape. When Ricky didn't say 'May I', Daddy had a grape.

I absolutely did not. But I didn't give them to him unless he asked politely.

• Ricky wanting to write the word tractor, hexcavator, dump truck on Daddy's screen!

• Ricky worked upstairs.

• Ricky didn't touch things.

• May I type words on Daddy's screen please!

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm,,,,mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

• M. A lot of M. Wanting to type N. En double yooo.

• Ricky's wanting to type words!

n n nnnnnnnnnn n nn n n n nnnnnwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwv wvcwce;

• Ricky wanting to type more words!

ppppppppppppp ppppppppppppppppppppp

• A lot of P!

hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

• A lot of aitches!

hm,hhhhhhhhhhhhmmhmhmhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyj n c xzscddddcccd bbd

I was at the foodbank last week, had about an hour to wait in line. They let us relax inside of the church and have snacks and drinks, it was a chill time.

At one point, a college-aged looking kid snuck up onto the church's music stage. He sat at the piano for a couple of minutes, looking around nervously. Lifted the lid [is that the word... ?] off of the keys. Made some hand movements above the keys, but didn't hit them.

Finally, he started playing. Moonlight Sonata. I scooted over a few seats from where I was and recorded some of it. When he finished, I clapped and a couple of the church volunteers joined me.

He took a break for a couple of minutes, then played another song. And then another. I didn't recognize these ones; they sounded more modern, so maybe pop songs?

Finally his number was called and he left to get his food.

I did it because I’m going to secretly get her a new phone and give it to her when I drop off McDonald’s for lunch. She already picked out the phone, we talked about getting a new one. She probably figured out what I’m doing, but it will still be a nice surprise.

I also have to outshine every other partner at her work. They apparently think I’m an angel and do too much for her, so obviously it’s competition now and I must win (I’m kidding).

Her phone is a iPhone 12 mini, it gets hot when you think about or look at the phone; it doesn’t charge well; if you bump it wrong, it says there is no SIM card. If you charge and play on it, it get extremely hot. It’s a hazard and she refuses to get a new one.

EDIT: I walked in and showed everyone her McDonald’s bag, and she opened it and was so excited!! I did go ahead and buy a phone case and a screen protector and had the people put the screen on for me. But I put it in the box with the charger and stuff, so she has a nice pretty phone, no fingerprints or anything lol. She apparently complained to some coworkers about her phone but they were super pumped when they saw it. I can post a picture if you guys want lol. I was so giddy when they opened the door for me!

You will probably be able to tell which parts Ricky typed. Some of the quoted comments he made were said during the bit he typed and then I added them.

pdpqttyhggggggggggggt ttttt

• Ricky got a lot of Ts!

• Ricky got only one T!

• Some more Ts!

• Ricky type one more letter.

jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj,j,jjjj,,jj,jjjj,,,,j,jjjjjjjjjj...jj.j.-0poo7543*

• Ricky wanting a lot of Js.

• Ricky type Js this time!

j,nnnv bcvczcadcwqedcfcfqfc2efw1qw`weP

ünnblujukkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkku......................................u.........u,u,uuu,uuuu

• That's many Ks!

• Yoooooooooooo. Ooooooooo.

• Ricky wanting to spell Mummy!

m mummy

• Spell Ricky!

ry

riiiiiiiiiiiiiii

rickyyyyy

• Ricky wanting to make a lawnmower. A lawnmower makes lawns. It cut the grass.

• A little one and a big one.

• Now it a little hexcavator.

No art today. During all of the time we might have done art he was sweeping. Today we unpacked a little broom and dustpan we got for him that's small enough for him to use. He declared: "Ricky is going to do some cleaning."

And then everything was getting swept.

I should note I have no idea how he got the umlaut. There is apparently a way to get an umlauted U in Windows that I don't know.

My boss is an elderly gentleman.
He had just come out of a pretty chaotic meeting. He came out saying his “brain was rigged”. Despite a packed schedule, he still agreed to discuss a project, I’d been pestering him about.

He logged in right after his previous meeting ended, and he had another one an hour later.

Instead of diving into work, he started playing this funny song ... Rasputin 😂 that’s become super popular again. I'm not a big fan and just nodded in disagreement.
He completely ignored me & played the entire thing... nodding his head in tune😂 for a full 3mins. Then he said my brain is refreshed now. Let's start work.

And honestly… he was right.

We discussed the project in ridiculous detail. But the conversation was so easy that I ended up confessing a pretty horrible blunder I’d made recently. I had accidentally sent a WA message meant for him to an entire group from the opposing side.

I was expecting atleast a lecture... eye rolling, some annoyance atleast.

But he simply read it and said, only the last line was a bit too blunt. That's it!!!

By the end of the meeting, he was holding his head in his hands. Probably exhausted by my endless blabbering. I even dared to say... sir, maybe you need to listen to the song once more.🤣😂🤣. He laughed.

I’ve had some rough experiences with bosses in the past. And this one seems almost monk-like. (touch wood)

It’s such a relief working with someone who doesn’t dramatize mistakes.
And so super cool to know that sometimes three minutes of silly music is better than forced productivity.

Good managers really do change your entire experience of work. For me personally, this was an oddly wholesome workplace moment... and I couldn't help but share.

I woke up this morning on the first day of my 3-day weekend. I went to my run club at 5:30 am and received a standing ovation for completing my first 100-mile race last weekend. It was great to see my friends. I went straight to a volunteer commitment I usually do on the first Thursday of the month. We receive pallets of food and distribute it. I met a new friend there. He made sure I was in on the jokes as my
Spanish is pretty bad. Afterwards, he asked me to grab a bite. He bought sandwiches and coffees and we chatted before I headed home to move apartments and deal with a long list of chores. I picked up some moving boxes I found for free in my ‘Buy Nothing’ group on Facebook.

Today, I feel like a part of my community. Everyday, I find reasons to continue believing most people are good. I moved around for a decade before I landed here and I don’t take these moments of connection for granted.

Tonight at the grocery store, as I’m walking past a young family, a small girl is showing her parents that she can count by tens to a hundred. As she finishes I walk by and state “Ma’am you count better than I do!” Her face lit up as did her parents’. Doesn’t take much to find the smiles all around us.

Today I was out reading on the communal patio and the kid came out, shoot some hoops with him.

At a point I was like "yeah let me do a last one before I go for groceries, I'll make it with one hand no big deal" (it was a big deal, I suck)

AND I MADE IT! His face said it all and I finally felt like The Cool Adult TM.

Sometimes life is good.

Edit: this isn't a flex to say I beat a kid, just one of those moments where you look cool in front of a younger person and feel inspirational

Sometimes she'll step on me and her little toe beans are warm. Either way, the feeling of her little feet on my skin makes me very happy.

Yesterday I went to a place called Berney Arms, a tiny little train "station" (or rather, platform) in the middle of the Norfolk Broads (scenic nowhere pretty much). The platform itself is tiny, only half the size of the front carriage.

Anyway I step out and I see flat grasslands/marshes for miles, and as soon as the train leaves it goes dead silent, I was the only one who got off the train.

After photographing the place, I sat down on the bench and start eating a couple pizza slices I saved from last night whilst enjoying the surrounding scenery, I felt so serene. From where I was sitting I could see the old windmill standing proudly, alongside some cows grazing in the distance.

As soon as I finished I set off for the two hour walk to Great Yarmouth along the River Yare.

PS: The area is only accessible by train, boat or walking, even then scheduled trains only stop there 4 times a day between Norwich and Great Yarmouth, although I believe you can request the train to stop there if you speak to the conductor.

• Ricky want some more noodles for Mummy!

• More and more and more noodles!

"If we put in more noodles it might be overflowing."

• singing Ooooverfloooowing...

• pointing Do you know what this word is?

• The Huckle Cat Book went bump and bumped at the pram and doonk at Ricky's face! It went boomp pram! Ricky was holding it.

• A blumboomba and a goonkboonka.

• Do you know what this one is?

• Ricky hold Mummy's steering wheel in Mummy's car!

• Do you know what this is called?

• See the corner goes around the edge of the cards and this goes in and you can put the lid on.

• Do you know what this is called?

So we have these phonics flash cards. He's a little young for them, in theory, but he saw them and loves them. He likes pointing out what the letter and picture on the front is, and then having all the example words read to him. Then he points at individual words and asks if I know what they say.

• We just needing a T! We got a G.

• I not tired!

• Play with the sand!

• Like this we go on Mummy's socks!

• In Daddy's bedroom there's some carpet and Ricky get to roll the balls along the carpet. Ricky play like this, we roll them. Aiming. Roll the ball along the carpet. Ricky rolling towards Daddy and then vrooming them back and then do it again. Vroom! And vrooming them again!

In other things he's too young for but very enthusiastic about: a set of carpet bowls (like lawn bowls, but for carpet) that belonged to my father and now belong to us. I remember playing with them when I was probably no more than four or five, so it's kind of amazing now playing with them with my son.

But, notably, his most successful shot was when he got distracted and slapped one backwards to get it out of his way without even looking.

Whether it's Daddy's bedroom or Mummy's bedroom depends on who was with him when he entered, even if all three of us are playing together. (He loves clambering over pillows and blankets, but he's still young enough that he doesn't get a pillow and sleeps in a sack with no loose covers at all, so he often really likes getting to play on our bed.) It's also the only room in the house with carpet.

I've built myself a tiny garden and bees and hummingbirds visit while I drink my coffee! And I grow things I can eat! If a plant experiment doesn't succeed I can just yeet it over the fence and try something new.

I just saw a man rolling his outdoor trash can down his long driveway. His little dog was riding on top. I don't know who was more thrilled -- myself or the dog.

It is so pristine and pretty. What if I mess it up? So many things are a mess. This beautiful little tome offers the hope for expression, yet I hover in that hope and turn it to anxiety and fear of some imagined failure to meet some imagined standard.