u/meganlo3

Hello, I hope it’s okay that I post here. Thank you in advance for sharing your thoughts - I’m trying to learn all that I can before I meet with my RE again.

A brief history: TTC on our own led to 3 pregnancies (conceived within 1-2 cycles) and 3 missed miscarriages. We tested the last 2 and found random chromosomal abnormalities (1 from the sperm, 1 from the egg). We moved to IVF for PGT-A. 3 egg retrievals later, we got an expected number of eggs but a lower than expected number of embryos and euploid embryos specifically. Based on what they saw in the lab, they thought the eggs were to blame. I’ve never been given a good answer as to why my eggs are poor quality.

Flash forward - TW - our first transfer worked and resulted in a live birth. We are trying again and my 2nd transfer failed outright. We have 1 embryo left. I don’t know if I have it in me to do more retrievals and I’m concerned that it will be even harder to get euploids this time. I want to make sure we aren’t missing anything. I’m talking to my RE tomorrow. I have a feeling that she’s not going to immediately jump to more testing but I don’t want to waste this embryo. I’m concerned that something like endometriosis could be apart of this picture. I do have heavier periods. I have a long history of anxiety/depression. I am not sure my pain is excessive with menstruation (but how much do we gaslight ourselves about this?) but occasionally I have had terrible bowel movements in the past - especially when pregnant - to the point I think I’m going to pass out. The first time it happened I thought I was having a miscarriage and went to the ER.

Does this seem like a path I should bother going down? I’ve seen that receptiva isn’t reliable, but is it a good place to start? What else should I be thinking about with possible symptoms/testing?

There is an automatic shift in my husband’s behavior and personality when he starts drinking sometimes. It doesn’t even have to be more than one (strong) drink in. It’s the way he speaks and how he carries himself. When he is in that state, it often leads to a fight. He can become emotionally volatile and irrational, and often blames me. I am trying to think of the words to describe to him how I know he is off even if I don’t see him drink. One word that comes to mind is erratic. Do others have helpful ways of describing this?