u/ladybugsrool

Everything I want to say, but can't.

I love you, more than life, more than time, and there will never be enough time for me to love you how I want to. You let me down, you watched me fall and you can't even pick up the broken pieces, why didn't you glue me back together and hold me close and protect me how you were supposed to? I see no life in which I am happy without you, I see no life where I move on from this pain, for this pain is hell. Having had heaven; I walked through the flowers and felt rain on my skin and saw stars in your eyes, the absence of you is a fiery hell; the flowers all died, the rain got cold and the stars fell down. Hell is loving you when I can't have you. Heaven was once not knowing you, never having felt your skin on mine, never having known your name or the sound of your voice. Having had you, heaven feels impossible, for I can never forget you and Hell is knowing I never want to.

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u/ladybugsrool — 3 days ago

Everything I want to say, but can't.

I love you, more than life, more than time, and there will never be enough time for me to love you how I want to. You let me down, you watched me fall and you can't even pick up the broken pieces, why didn't you glue me back together and hold me close and protect me how you were supposed to? I see no life in which I am happy without you, I see no life where I move on from this pain, for this pain is hell. Having had heaven; I walked through the flowers and felt rain on my skin and saw stars in your eyes, the absence of you is a fiery hell; the flowers all died, the rain got cold and the stars fell down. Hell is loving you when I can't have you. Heaven was once not knowing you, never having felt your skin on mine, never having known your name or the sound of your voice. Having had you, heaven feels impossible, for I can never forget you and Hell is knowing I never want to.

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u/ladybugsrool — 3 days ago
▲ 27 r/Poems

Beautiful Ruin

I shouldn't have loved a poet

they don't hold you, they haunt you.

He didn't touch me,

he understood me

and that was far more dangerous.

I wanted something light,

something I could forget

but he turned every moment

into meaning.

And I hate how his passion

makes me feel seen,

like I'm more than I should be.

Because I know this

even if he loved me,

we were never meant to last.

He would feel too deeply,

and I would believe it

and somewhere between truth

and poetry,

we would lose ourselves.

So I step back,

even when I want to stay

because loving him

feels less like love,

and more like

a beautiful kind of ruin.

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u/ladybugsrool — 4 days ago

What's a very obvious sign that someone is lying to you?

I feel like I have always been good at reading body language, some people make it very very obvious when they're lying, but id love to know your personal experiences and how you know someone's lying to you.

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u/ladybugsrool — 5 days ago

I've been stalked by an unknown person for the past 4 years, and have no idea what to do about it.

Location: Springfield, MA

It started really tame about four years ago, I got a call from a blocked number which I never answered, they then sent me messages almost everyday, basic things like asking about my day, my job, my family. I'd block them and they'd just get a new number.

They started to talk about things like "what's it like being a virgin" and other really provocative things, I never once replied.

I had a suspicion it was my best friend for a long time, didn't have an ex partner at that point so I didn't suspect that. She showed me her phone on command because I wanted to make sure it wasn't her, couldn't have been I'll just say that, never found proof.

It stopped for a while, (3 months or so) but then I started getting messages from them on social media, it turned to bullying very very quickly, I ignored it and blocked them everytime but they made NUMEROUS accounts, it got so bad to the point I thought about throwing my phone away and getting a flip.

Its very obvious that it's been the same person the entire time, just based on their text style and the things they've said in messages.

I met my (now ex) boyfriend 2 years ago, and that's when things got really bad. The "stalker" started threatening to kill him, and themself if I didn't break up with him, I got sent a photo of my front porch once and then installed security cameras and they never showed up again, at least not that I know of. They sent me photos and videos of themself self harming and hitting themself too.

Never been certain whether it is a male or a female.

They would call me daily and then eventually started calling my boyfriend, his sister got sent some messages too.

It's been incessant for 4 years, non stop harrassment.

I've been to the police twice, there is nothing they can really do, from what I've heard, they said they'd investigate but that was over a year ago now.

It has to be someone close to me, they knew my name when they first started messaging, my age, birthday, address and phone number.

I can't even think of a reasonable explanation for why someone would go so far out of their way to harass me.

I've probably missed some details so if you have any questions please ask, I am an open book. Feel free to also share similar experiences and what you did about it, if anything.

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u/ladybugsrool — 6 days ago

I’ve been thinking about posting this here for a while because I honestly don't know how the timelines work out. I was about 9 at the time, and I shared a room with my sister who was only one. She was a pretty difficult baby and would wake up screaming all the time, so my mum coming in to comfort her was a regular thing.

One night I was having a really hard time sleeping. I was having these super weird, vivid dreams, and eventually, I woke up to my sister absolutely losing it. Like, blood-curdling screams. I was in that weird half-awake, half-asleep state where your body feels heavy, and I was facing the wall.

I heard the door open and heard my mum walk in like she always did. She used to sing this lullaby to quiet my sister down. She started to hum.

I finally turned over, she was crouched down on the floor right at the edge of my mattress. She was rocking back and forth with my sister in her arms, but she was looking directly at me.

Just staring. I was so freaked out I couldn't even find my voice to say anything, so I just sat up a bit on my elbows and watched her. I could tell she was crying. Eventually, my sister stopped fussing, and she put her back in the crib and left.

I was so spooked that I kept my light on for the rest of the night.

The next morning, I couldn't find my mum anywhere. It turns out she had killed herself during the night. The part that fucks with me is not knowing whether or not my mum was actually there, if I was having some fucked up dream or if I was hallucinating.

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u/ladybugsrool — 7 days ago

Mines not really unconventional, but my ex boyfriend used to pick his nose and eat it, and for two years I pretended I never saw it happen, not even 100% he knew he was doing it 🤣

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u/ladybugsrool — 7 days ago