i dont know whether im an isfp or infp
its could be something different but these r the ones i find most likely
well.. its been shoved down my throat that im not very likeable or easy to get along with. I don’t like being told what to do and value autonomy and freedom over everything, even opting to do things people dont like to prove a point, so yeah.. i get into arguments and fights alot. I js like playing devils advocate i guess? and find drama fun \^\^
i dont like being vulnerable or the cold, i dont like when people grab or drag me around like some doll or say meaningless compliments ik theyre only saying cuz its what i wanna hear like bleh. I find it hard to give or receive affection and usually push people away quickly. The cold is kinda random but its one thing i cant stand, i js like being curled up with blankets.
i kind if flip between logical and emotional i guess? im pretty clever and aware id say, usually noticing small signs about peoples body language bit i usually dont say much + yk i do good in school. I get jealous and pissed easily, even with things that probably dont even have correlation tbh, it sucks since i tend to cry easily when i get emotional and i hate that nobody takes me seriously cuz of it.
kinda expanding on the last thing, i usually keep track of details about people usually js to avoid them or not have to deal with them. I tend to be in my head alot since most people ik r dicks. I tend to mess and tease myself over my mental issues, and usually dont take them seriously and i save way too many pictures and quotes on my phones photos and notes app.
ik i sound like such a narc but sapiosexual i guess? + im like 90% sure i have bpd, im prob never gonna get tested for it tho, like i kinda said earlier my emotions flip like theyre on a dial among other stuff.
i sound soo prissy but i love to romanticise alcohol, hookups, smoking, double suicides etc. Whaa? its hot.
i make bad habits of somehow forgetting peoples faces/names yet remembering codes and where i hid my things etc.
im apparently a smartass? i dont really care for grades that much, i js like being better than people tbh.
i hate when being ignore me or abandon me, i want people to yell at me so it atleast shows they gave a shit. If people start to ignore me, i sometimes start pissing them off on purpose to talk to them.
my biggest fear is loss of autonomy or control, i hate being withheld in anyway or like i cant move my arms or legs, it freaks me out so im lucky ive had no sleep paralysis \^\^
im a brat apparently? prob the hissing and pawing with my sleeve i guess, so i guess im mature mentally but tend to act immature in my actions
i hate being wrong and i cant handle losing at stuff, i used to be heavily praised and now its like idk what im doing
i suck at trusting people and it takes a long time for me to open up, like literal months and i might js ghost u if i feel like i said too much
id say i daydream/romanticise things alot but i usually deny it, tbf i usually deny everything no matter what.
i find it hard to express my emotions, and dont know how to deal with stress that well, causing me to lash out at people.
i enjoy drama but to a certain extent, if im getting ganged up on, i feel lost and kinda freeze or run off when theres too much expected of me.
speaking of i dont like being smart, people always force expectations on me and it stresses me out, i dont strive for much anymore cuz of it.
I freakin love music, playing or listening to it and drawing sketches. I adore dressing up and doing cosplay, find it fun to dress up androgynously and be a different person for a day its why i like the internet.
I get jealous and possessive easily, i can ten to be clingy apparently and like attention solely on me
i love wrapping my arms and body arpund stuff, usually using a chair or w pillow to hold and rest my chin on
i get red in the face and embarassed easily amd start denying things rapid fire, i hate it and always try covering it up