u/Mayyounotsuffer123

So in February 2025 I had a burnout cause of very difficult conditions at work.

At the same time, my control OCD started again at work (had been since then 4 years OCD-free).

Talking to my ONLINE psychiatrist (I’ve known him since my OCD started 14 years ago), I asked him why I felt so extremely tired at work and in condition where I felt unable to continue working. I also asked him why did OCD come again. He suggested a medication change, not only for the OCD but also for the burnout. Before the change I took Paroxetine and Depakine (mood stabilizer). He offered to change the two meds with Venlafaxine und Pregabalin because he said Venlafaxine could help me with Noradrenalin and so with the burnout.

I was insecure and tried organizing a second opinion with another psychiatrist but he was sold out. I decided to change meds. I could function for two more weeks but then I collapsed. OCD became huge and I relapsed so badly I had to go in various clinics.

I hate my old psychiatrist for that. I know in the end it was me who decided to change but still: I don’t understand going from SSRI to SNRI when I never tried SNRI’s.

Should I blame my psychiatrist? Or is this my fault?

Hey guys! I don’t even know how to start this.

I’ve been suffering from OCD since 2015 (I’m 28 now). The “funny” thing is that I’ve always treated my OCD with medication and suddenly symptoms got away. Nobody ever told me about CBT or ERP. I’ve had 2-3 relapses cause of medication change but after the change my brain worked again.

In March 2025 I chanced medication with my psichiatrist again and this time it went very bad. I couldn’t recover from it so I went to various clinics. Nothing helped me. In the summer I heard about ERP and CBT so I started it.

After two sessions I interrupted cause my OCD told me I could fall in love with female therapists.

I started then making exposures with a male nurse who got a diploma in ERP. At first my mother tried to stop me from working with the nurse cause she thought exposures weren’t gonna treat my OCD.

So week after week I did my exposures and I thought I was progressing but all the time my mom would make comments about how I was wasting my time and that I should either go work again cause time flies and money is important.

So during my treatment with the nurse I was constantly put under pressure from my mother. Little context: I still live with my 70 years mom who has physical problems and who has a lot of power over me since I struggle showing up for myself cause of my OCD and low self esteem.

Now is April 2026 and I haven’t yet started ERP with a real therapist and think my symptoms are the same as in summer (strong contamination OCD, control OCD, reassurance seeking OCD).

My brain tells me I have wasted an entire year cause I listened to my mother and didn’t take decisions on my own. I wish I had started ERP with a therapist in the summer but my OCD was too strong.

Have you had similar experiences about the thought of having lost time or let your OCD untreated?

The fear of having lost time is killing me and I think about it 24/7 and call during the whole day my family for reassurance all the time.

I’m stuck in my home since 1 year now.

I also often think that my OCD is not treatable.

How do I motivate myself to keep going after a bad relapse that started a year ago? How do I start therapy by being positive and optimistic?

Cause rn I’m very exhausted and pessimistic!

What are your experiences?

Am I the only one whose family stood in my way while I was trying to fight OCD and get treated?

Have you also experienced this kind of problem with family or friends?

Like someone doesen’t believe in you and doesen’t understand your condition and take decisions instead of you cause you’re fragile in that moment.

So in February 2025 I had a burnout cause of very difficult conditions at work.

At the same time, my control OCD started again at work (had been since then 4 years OCD-free).

Talking to my ONLINE psychiatrist, I asked him why I felt so extremely tired at work and in condition where I felt unable to continue working. I also asked him why did OCD come again. He suggested a medication change, not only for the OCD but also for the burnout. Before the change I took Paroxetine and Depakine (mood stabilizer). He offered to change the two meds with Venlafaxine und Pregabalin because he said Venlafaxine could help me with Noradrenalin and so with the burnout.

I was insecure and tried organizing a second opinion with another psychiatrist but he was sold out. I decided to change meds. I could function for two more weeks but then I collapsed. OCD became huge and I relapsed so badly I had to go in various clinics.

I hate my old psychiatrist for that. I know in the end it was me who decided to change but still: I don’t understand going from SSRI to SNRI when I never tried SNRI’s.

Should I blame my psychiatrist? Or is this my fault?

What motivated you to start therapy? Why did you decide to fight OCD?

What did you all stop smoking? What was the reason?