u/MaroonFeather

(TW: parental death, child abuse/neglect mention) I’m an international adoptee and hired a PI from my birth country to find my family and she did, but I am saddened by the news. My bio mom died when she was 32 back in 2010. She was extremely ill, bedridden, and had dementia. Her mother was an alcoholic and both of her parents have passed away. Her brother is also dead. There is nobody on my bio mom’s side that is still alive. I was given zero information about my bio father so finding him is impossible. It’s so weird to grieve a family you’ve never met.

A couple years ago I discovered that my adoption was illegal through falsified documents, coercion, and under the table all cash payment. Human trafficking basically. My adoptive mother manipulated her way through the system to adopt me when legally she shouldn’t have been allowed to. My adoptive mother was severely abusive and negligent my whole childhood. Her mental illnesses were so bad that my uncle and aunt almost took me away from her, but my extended family (who all knew she was abusive) chose to do nothing instead.

After finding out my adoption was illegal, I really started wanting to reunite with my biological mom. I fantasized about meeting her and finding out she still loved me and wanted me. I wanted to know what her life was like. I wanted to tell her that despite my hardships I never blamed her for anything bad that happened to me. I never held any grudges for her not wanting me. It sounds like her life was so hard. I wish she was alive. I wish I could hug her.

(Tw: death) I was born in Russia and adopted from an orphanage when I was a year old. I finally hired a PI to find my biological family, and it turns out they’re all gone. My birth mom is dead, her grandparents and her brother are dead. I don’t know what to feel, but I’m sad that I’ll never be able to have a reunion like I’ve always wanted. I just really wanted to meet my mom, ask her about her life, and find out about my medical history.

I always wanted a reunion, but it turns out she died in 2010. Found out from a private investigator. I never got to meet her. I wanted to tell her about my life and hear about hers. Now I’ll never get that. I kind of fantasized that she would love me because I was adopted/raised by a single woman who severely abused and neglected me. I felt so unloved for so long. I’ll never know if my birth mother was curious about me and it sucks. I had so many questions I wanted to ask her.