u/Flashy_Cobbler5329

i don't know what's going on.

i got forced into recovery about this time last year. ever since, i've been very anxious whenever i think about food. i'm either maintaining, which makes me feel so very guilty, or gaining because of overeating episodes. my whole day revolves around food: getting scared i'll lose control, procrastinating doing things and eating instead, losing focus because all i think about is food.. its crazy, genuinely. i cannot seem to focus on school AT ALL. i focused 101% better when i was restricting. the more i eat, the worse i feel. i've eaten, so, so much today (mostly carbs) and yet i feel completely out of energy. i stand up and my heart starts beating incredibly fast, i get dizzy JUST sitting down – mind you, this only happens WHEN I EAT MORE. food is genuinely ruining my life. i wanna do other things like people my age. i feel i have no personality and no hobbies outside of food. i have been, at the very least, maintaining my weight for a year, even gaining from my lowest. but the gains have been due to emotional eating/stress eating. i don't know how to manage difficult times, i now resort to food to soothe my anxiousness. i am a very anxious person. so this just drags me into a neverending loop of anxiety.. life brings me anxiety, i panic, i eat, i panic about eating, i cry, i panic about my life and eat more, panic about eating... it never ends. this is true inferno.

i don't know what to do. i feel so ashamed. i cannot even stand to look at my body. i cant go out out in anything thats not baggy. i struggle with showering because i'd rather die than see my body. i feel gross, i feel disgusting, unproductive, uncapable and anxious. so, so anxious.

hello. i'm in recovery and have been for around a year now.

i struggle a LOT. to summarize, my intake fluctuates drastically from day to day and it's exhausting.

my issue is that when i eat more than usual, i feel absolutely terrible. i get so sleepy, brain foggy, i get dizzy AS I LAY DOWN and my heart rate skyrockets whenever i get up. i feel completely out of energy.. why does this happen? does anyone have any advice?

i don't know what's going on.

i got forced into recovery about this time last year. ever since, i've been very anxious whenever i think about food. i'm either maintaining, which makes me feel so very guilty, or gaining because of overeating episodes. my whole day revolves around food: getting scared i'll lose control, procrastinating doing things and eating instead, losing focus because all i think about is food.. its crazy, genuinely. i cannot seem to focus on school AT ALL. i focused 101% betrer when i was restricting. the more i eat, the worse i feel. i've eaten, so, so much today (mostly carbs) and yet i feel completely out of energy. i stand up and my heart starts beating incredibly fast, i get dizzy JUST sitting down – mind you, this only happens WHEN I EAT MORE. food is genuinely ruining my life. i wanna do other things like people my age. i feel i have no personality and no hobbies outside of food. i have been, at the very least, maintaining my weight for a year, even gaining from my lowest. but the gains have been due to emotional eating/stress eating. i don't know how to manage difficult times, i now resort to food to soothe my anxiousness. i am a very anxious person. so this just drags me into a neverending loop of anxiety.. life brings me anxiety, i panic, i eat, i panic about eating, i cry, i panic about my life and eat more, panic about eating... it never ends. this is true inferno.

i don't know what to do. i feel so ashamed. i cannot even stand to look at my body. i cant go out out in anything thats not baggy. i struggle with showering because i'd rather die than see my body. i feel gross, i feel disgusting, unproductive, uncapable and anxious. so, so anxious.

i bought some nori snacks and right after finishing them, i found literal oil on the bottom of the little plastic tray. i believe there were about 8ish? little seaweed sheets.. did i mess things up?

i've been struggling with my mental health a LOT due to seasonal depression, but i can feel myself getting better. still, i'd like some positivity! cute pets, quotes, funny jokes, songs you like, random facts.. anything is ok :-) if it makes you happy, it makes me happy