So context, My mother is 52 and I am 32. We have always had a decent relationship. I am now a mother to a 2 year old boy and baby boy on the way (due in a month). When the first came along, my mother was extremely excited and attentive to the baby. She was always offering to watch him for us, (we have to bring him to their home) buy him clothes or toys and generally just spoils him. She still spoils him with amazon buys (she has a shopping addiction) Now that he is a toddler, she hasn't been so keen on keeping him overnight, we haven't had a date night in month? Has anyone ever had that happen?
The other issue is this; I am responsible for the mental load of planning and executing almost everything when it comes to family time. She lacks any ambition to plan or do things. I have to plan any family events, I have to drive over to their home to visit or do family outings. When we had the second baby shower, I had to find the park shelter, rent it out, order all the food and supplies. She then offered to add on to what we brought.. When we got their to set up, she immediately took to watching the toddler instead of setting up.
Should I try and talk to her about it or let it go and accept that this is how she is? My parents have never been super affectionate or "normal" parents...and I'm trying to decide if this is just pregnancy hormones and I'm feeling overwhelmed with the prospect of little outside help from my mother with two under two.