u/Firm_Web4272

hello there.

I am currently in 10th grade. I'm currently in sem 2 (ontario canada btw), and I find my my situation quite perplexing. I find that I understand and am very fundamentally strong at math, but whenever tests come up, I just bomb the frick outta them and am performing quite bad tbh. I'm not sure though, it seems impossible to improve. I've gotten too many people saying to do contest questions or high amounts of practice. Well, I've been doing that, but no results seem to come. It's even more frustrating given that i had to work my ahh off to pull up a comeback in my later years of middle school, as I wasn't naturally studious. Ib has truly been a reality check. I also want to pursue engineering in the future, and it seems like a huge gamble that I took real ib next year, and I'm extremely scared and nervous. Has anyone else gone through a similar situation? Thanks so much.

hello there.

I am currently in 10th grade. I'm currently in sem 2 (ontario canada btw), and I find my my situation quite perplexing. I find that I understand and am very fundamentally strong at math, but whenever tests come up, I just bomb the frick outta them and am performing quite bad tbh. I'm not sure though, it seems impossible to improve. I've gotten too many people saying to do contest questions or high amounts of practice. Well, I've been doing that, but no results seem to come. It's even more frustrating given that i had to work my ahh off to pull up a comeback in my later years of middle school, as I wasn't naturally studious. Ib has truly been a reality check. I also want to pursue engineering in the future, and it seems like a huge gamble that I took real ib next year, and I'm extremely scared and nervous. Has anyone else gone through a similar situation? Thanks so much.

I find myself always having a conflict between internal expectations and what my actions are. I want to progressively turn into someone who is respected and doesn't do bs all the time. Yet, when I go to school, I turn towards my social nature and start acting like a goofy dick who no one takes seriously.

I become too social, rowdy at times, and just someone who gives too many fucks about others and what they think. I chase social approval asf, and I've become super far from what I want to be. I accept that change should come from within and from my mindset, but I'm not able to totally ingrain this into my mind, and once I start my goofy sh again, I fall into the loop.

The thing is, this has been bothering me for a while because I know I want more for myself. I want to be someone disciplined, respected, and taken seriously, but my actions don't really line up with that. It's like I know the type of person I want to become, but when I'm actually around people, especially at school, I switch up and become this overly social, attention-seeking version of myself. Then when school's done, I regret it and think, “why did I act like that again?”

I also started to read Mark Manson's Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k, and I find the stories quite amusing. While his points are valid, my nature prefers being a social goofball and acting like a clown or something to get attention. It may seem like I'm not trying, but I'm honestly really confused and regret being too social once school's done.

Part of me wonders if I'm trying too hard to get validation or if I've just built habits that are hard to break. I don't want to completely kill my personality or become some emotionless robot either, but I do want to stop acting in ways I regret and actually become more aligned with who I want to be.

I'm not sure how to change this. Any tips? Thanks.

I find myself always having a conflict between internal expectations and what my actions are. I want to progressively turn into someone who is respected and doesn't do bs all the time. Yet, when I go to school, I turn towards my social nature and start acting like a goofy dick who no one takes seriously.

I become too social, rowdy at times, and just someone who gives too many fucks about others and what they think. I chase social approval asf, and I've become super far from what I want to be. I accept that change should come from within and from my mindset, but I'm not able to totally ingrain this into my mind, and once I start my goofy sh again, I fall into the loop.

i'm not sure how to change this. any tips? thanks

I find myself always having a conflict between internal expectations and what my actions are. I want to progressively turn into someone who is respected and doesn't do bs all the time. Yet, when I go to school, I turn towards my social nature and start acting like a goofy dick who no one takes seriously.

I become too social, rowdy at times, and just someone who gives too many fucks about others and what they think. I chase social approval asf, and I've become super far from what I want to be. I accept that change should come from within and from my mindset, but I'm not able to totally ingrain this into my mind, and once I start my goofy sh again, I fall into the loop.

i'm not sure how to change this. any tips? thanks

hello there.

I am currently in 10th grade. I'm currently in sem 2 (ontario canada btw), and I find my my situation quite perplexing. I find that I understand and am very fundamentally strong at math, but whenever tests come up, I just bomb the frick outta them and am performing quite bad tbh. I'm not sure though, it seems impossible to improve. I've gotten too many people saying to do contest questions or high amounts of practice. Well, I've been doing that, but no results seem to come. It's even more frustrating given that i had to work my ahh off to pull up a comeback in my later years of middle school, as I wasn't naturally studious. Ib has truly been a reality check. I also want to pursue engineering in the future, and it seems like a huge gamble that I took real ib next year, and I'm extremely scared and nervous. Has anyone else gone through a similar situation? Thanks so much.If pre-ib seems difficult, is ib going to be any good

hello there.

I am currently in 10th grade. I'm currently in sem 2 (ontario canada btw), and I find my my situation quite perplexing. I find that I understand and am very fundamentally strong at math, but whenever tests come up, I just bomb the frick outta them and am performing quite bad tbh. I'm not sure though, it seems impossible to improve. I've gotten too many people saying to do contest questions or high amounts of practice. Well, I've been doing that, but no results seem to come. It's even more frustrating given that i had to work my ahh off to pull up a comeback in my later years of middle school, as I wasn't naturally studious. Ib has truly been a reality check. I also want to pursue engineering in the future, and it seems like a huge gamble that I took real ib next year, and I'm extremely scared and nervous. Has anyone else gone through a similar situation? Thanks so much.

hey there.

I'm currently in high school, and it's honestly been one of the most turbulent times of my life. from experience high school life, drastic academic changes (took ib, its been a huge reality check), and getting into things like self-improvement and business, I honestly am really confused about my life right now. but one thing's for sure. I will 100% run a business in the future, specifically something regarding ai/engineering areas as it is something I used to be passionate about and potentially my best bet for a business as doing something random will make me 10x less likely to follow through.

I do have a few huge problems though

My first business videography + editing which I started in grade 9 was a total joke. I went to around 10 businesses within 2 months, pitched to them on how I'll record and create reels for them for free. I got a total of 10 rejections, and the only real projects came from my other friends who had a real business with real clients, where I also did a mid job. My videos weren't really uploaded. Following that, I'm seeing many of my friends create their own businesses with impressive dedication, and I'm honestly kinda demotivated. For example, a couple have a marketing agency, another built an AI study app, and now made an ai which deploys web-based applications, and these guys blow my mind. They were all quite supportive and gave me opportunities to contribute or to build my own business, but I ended up feeling like I'm dragging myself to do shit and I heavily lack action/commitment. I soon came to the realization that video editing might be a good introductory experience, but it is far from my goals and results that I would like. unless I get time in the future, its just going to be a race of beginner video battling their asses off on freelancing websites. I want to offer a real service with real clients, and AI will i believe give me a really good chance at that.

the issue with me is that I compare a lot. next, i have a very limited skill base and am honestly lost with where to start. I keep on getting bs advice on "finding your passion", but due to school and how stupidly demanding ib is, I have limited time to build on anything or find what I think I can fuck with and pour my blood sweat and tears (and live with crippling debt and power through with brute force).

so honestly I'm just lost. people are too ahead. I'm burntout due to comparing too much. don't have any real skills, (I don't have the skills to manage 10 businesses nor do I know how to create a simple rock-paper-scissors program using python), and I don't have substantial knowledge in any particular sector. I can probably make time and really follow through, but I'm looking to see if anyone might've been as lost as me or took the leap of faith and invested themselves into honing a new skill which ended up being very beneficial. also mb for writing a whole fucking rant.

hey there.

I'm currently in high school, and it's honestly been one of the most turbulent times of my life. from experience high school life, drastic academic changes (took ib, its been a huge reality check), and getting into things like self-improvement and business, I honestly am really confused about my life right now. but one thing's for sure. I will 100% run a business in the future, specifically something regarding ai/engineering areas as it is something I used to be passionate about and potentially my best bet for a business as doing something random will make me 10x less likely to follow through.

I do have a few huge problems though

My first business videography + editing which I started in grade 9 was a total joke. I went to around 10 businesses within 2 months, pitched to them on how I'll record and create reels for them for free. I got a total of 10 rejections, and the only real projects came from my other friends who had a real business with real clients, where I also did a mid job. My videos weren't really uploaded. Following that, I'm seeing many of my friends create their own businesses with impressive dedication, and I'm honestly kinda demotivated. For example, a couple have a marketing agency, another built an AI study app, and now made an ai which deploys web-based applications, and these guys blow my mind. They were all quite supportive and gave me opportunities to contribute or to build my own business, but I ended up feeling like I'm dragging myself to do shit and I heavily lack action/commitment. I soon came to the realization that video editing might be a good introductory experience, but it is far from my goals and results that I would like. unless I get time in the future, its just going to be a race of beginner video battling their asses off on freelancing websites. I want to offer a real service with real clients, and AI will i believe give me a really good chance at that.

the issue with me is that I compare a lot. next, i have a very limited skill base and am honestly lost with where to start. I keep on getting bs advice on "finding your passion", but due to school and how stupidly demanding ib is, I have limited time to build on anything or find what I think I can fuck with and pour my blood sweat and tears (and live with crippling debt and power through with brute force).

so honestly I'm just lost. people are too ahead. I'm burntout due to comparing too much. don't have any real skills, (I don't have the skills to manage 10 businesses nor do I know how to create a simple rock-paper-scissors program using python), and I don't have substantial knowledge in any particular sector. I can probably make time and really follow through, but I'm looking to see if anyone might've been as lost as me or took the leap of faith and invested themselves into honing a new skill which ended up being very beneficial. also mb for writing a whole fucking rant.