u/Financial_Crazy_4568

I feel like I might be doing something wrong, and I just need to get it off my chest.

I (18F) reconnected with my ex best friend’s ex boyfriend, and now I think I like him.

Me and this girl (18F) haven’t been close for over 2 years, but we used to be inseparable. Back then, she dated this guy (21M). The complicated part is that I actually knew him before she did, we were really close friends, completely platonic.

When they were together, she told me everything about their relationship. After they broke up, he told me his side too, and it sounded messy. There was a lot of drinking, and he felt like she sometimes took advantage of him when he wasn’t sober. For example: She used to take his card and spend like 100 dollars because drunk or high Johnnie said yes. Johnnie never slept with her. She just kind of used him to say, "Hey I got a boyfriend that gives me money and stuff." Johnnie didn't care at the time cause he loved her. He told me this all and showed me the screenshots of what happened. So I obviously I believe him, but when she told me he was a terrible person, I didn’t want to be in the middle of it, so I cut him off. I still feel guilty about that.

About a month ago, I added him on Snapchat and to my surprise he added me back and we instantly clicked again. It felt like no time had passed. We started hanging out, and at a party we both got drunk and ended up hooking up.

Now it’s not just that anymore.

We keep talking and spending time together, and I’m starting to realize I actually have feelings for him. I don’t know if we’ll date, but it feels like it could go there.

And that’s what’s bothering me.

It’s been over 2 years since I was friends with her, but I still feel like I’m crossing some kind of line. At the same time, she’s not in my life anymore, so I don’t know if I even owe her that kind of loyalty.

I don’t even feel guilty about liking him because I don't really give a shit what other people think but I haven't told anyone that we might be dating but who knows maybe someone caught us hooking up so now I just need to know if anyone has been in the same situation as me maybe relatable?

I don’t know. I just needed to say it somewhere.

EDIT: I thought I added ages! They dated when she was 13 and he was 16 and then move forward a bit he was 17 and she was 14 when they broke it off he didn't want to be in trouble or date someone under 18!

I feel like I might be doing something wrong, and I just need to get it off my chest.

I (18F) reconnected with my ex best friend’s ex boyfriend, and now I think I like him.

Me and this girl (18F) haven’t been close for over 2 years, but we used to be inseparable. Back then, she dated this guy (21M). The complicated part is that I actually knew him before she did, we were really close friends, completely platonic.

When they were together, she told me everything about their relationship. After they broke up, he told me his side too, and it sounded messy. There was a lot of drinking, and he felt like she sometimes took advantage of him when he wasn’t sober. For example: She used to take his card and spend like 100 dollars because drunk or high Johnnie said yes. Johnnie never slept with her. She just kind of used him to say, "Hey I got a boyfriend that gives me money and stuff." Johnnie didn't care at the time cause he loved her. He told me this all and showed me the screenshots of what happened. So I obviously I believe him, but when she told me he was a terrible person, I didn’t want to be in the middle of it, so I cut him off. I still feel guilty about that.

About a month ago, I added him on Snapchat and to my surprise he added me back and we instantly clicked again. It felt like no time had passed. We started hanging out, and at a party we both got drunk and ended up hooking up.

Now it’s not just that anymore.

We keep talking and spending time together, and I’m starting to realize I actually have feelings for him. I don’t know if we’ll date, but it feels like it could go there.

And that’s what’s bothering me.

It’s been over 2 years since I was friends with her, but I still feel like I’m crossing some kind of line. At the same time, she’s not in my life anymore, so I don’t know if I even owe her that kind of loyalty.

I don’t even feel guilty about liking him because I don't really give a shit what other people think but I haven't told anyone that we might be dating but who knows maybe someone caught us hooking up so now I just need to know if anyone has been in the same situation as me maybe relatable?

I don’t know. I just needed to say it somewhere.

I (18F) need to know if I’m overthinking this or if my feelings are valid, because I honestly can’t tell if I’m being self-centered or not.

When I was 13, I became close with a girl let’s call her Autumn. she is my age. We were very close for about a year. I told her a lot about myself and my life, and I also introduced her to my friend group. She already knew one of my friends (let’s call her Lori), and I added another girl into the group (let’s call her Harley).

There was a lot of drama in the group over time. Another girl (let’s call her Kelly) didn’t get along with a girl I was close with Autumn. There were accusations, rumors, and arguments, and eventually things got messy. Autumn ended up turning harley against me, and I eventually stopped being friends with her and Harley when I was around 16.

After that, Kelly and I stayed in contact and talked a lot, but eventually just grew apart naturally with no real fallout.

In 2026, Harley and I became best friends again after reconnecting.

Here’s where I’m confused:

I feel like Autumn has started copying parts of my life. For example:

• I had a dog named Max who passed away in 2023, and I still post about him sometimes. Autumn recently got a dog of the exact same breed, even though she used to say she didn’t like that breed.
• She also got a truck that is the same brand as mine, even though she didn’t seem interested in it before. Mine is lifted, and she’s now saying she wants to “build hers up” too.

On top of that, she’s made comments before that felt like she was trying to compete with me or compare herself.

I asked Harley about it like the copying and she said and I quote autumn would say something along the lines of “no, I have my own life” and something also along the lines of that she is “better” because she has horses.”

I don’t know if I’m being delusional or self-centered for thinking she’s copying me, or if I’m just noticing patterns that are actually there.

AITA for thinking that this girl is copying me and being “self centered”?