She wants to put her shoes on herself. Okay, I wait. She struggles. I offer help. “NO.” I back off. She struggles more. Starts getting upset. I try again, still “NO.” Then suddenly she shoves the shoe at me like I’ve been ignoring her this whole time. I swear there’s a 3–4 second window where help is acceptable, and if I miss it, it’s over. Anyone else living in this phase? How are you timing it without losing your mind?
For the longest time, I thought that if I just explained things clearly enough, they’d get it. “We don’t hit because it hurts people.” I’ve said that probably 200 times to my 4 year old. One day I just acted it out instead used his stuffed animals, made it a bit dramatic, and showed what “getting hurt” actually looks like. Something clicked. Haven’t had to repeat that one nearly as much since. Made me realize they probably don’t learn through logic at this age as much as I thought. Curious if others have seen something similar. Does “showing” work better than explaining for your kids?
I recently realized most of the time I try to teach something new is in the evening… when they’re already tired and overstimulated. Tried shifting a few things to the right after nap time instead, and the difference is actually noticeable, way less resistance, more curiosity. Now I’m wondering how much of “this activity didn’t work” was actually just bad timing. Anyone else noticed timing matters more than the activity itself?
Thought I’d be a fun mom and let her “help” with dinner. She was so proud. She stirred things that didn’t need stirring, added salt twice, and dropped an entire handful of penne behind the stove.
The food was somehow fine. The kitchen was not.
But here’s the thing — she talked about it for THREE days. Still tells everyone she made dinner. That kind of engagement? Never happens with any toy we’ve bought her.
Anyone else accidentally discovered that “letting them help” is the most underrated toddler activity?
It’s not that he can’t focus; he clearly can when it’s something he enjoys. But when it comes to things like dinner, it’s a constant struggle. Lately, I’ve been wondering if it’s more about control, like he’s more engaged when it feels like his choice rather than something he has to do. Not sure if I’m overthinking it, but curious if others have noticed something similar? And if yes, have you found a way to use that to your advantage?