hello. i’m in my 20s and still a student. my bf is as well.
my friend recently came to me and said a few things.
- “ITS BARE MINIMUM FOR GUYS TO PAY FOR THEIR GF’S FOOD”
- “THEY SHOULD BE BUYING THEM GIFTS”
- “IM SURE HE WOULDNT WANT U TO PAY FOR HIM. LIKE ITS SO EMBARASSING.”
tbh it made me mad hahaha because personally i don’t believe in her kind of bare minimum la.
and NO i did not ask her for any advice or anything. she said all those things when i casually mentioned that i wanted to treat my bf to a meal. below are just questions out of curiosity based on what she said, that’s all.
which prompts my question to the guys:
1. how do yall feel if a girl or your gf offers to pay for you?
2. do yall actually feel embarassed if a girl or your gf wants for pay for you?
my bf just says he doesn’t want me to spend my money. but same for me i also don’t want him to spend his money…
and my question to the girls:
1. as students(if yall were students), do you really expect guys to always pay for you?
like i said. my bf and i are in our early 20s, and we are students. while i get that some girls want guys to pay for certain things or meals and buy gifts, i’ll have to say that my bf is literally a student. his family is quite well off, but they simply don’t want to give him much allowance, and he has a part time job but it’s hard for him to get shifts. so i especially do not want him to pay for my things or my meals.
for food we usually pay our own share, 50/50, sometimes we pay for each other. sometimes he just asks me to pay first at the counter, but he immediately transfers it to me when we leave the store.
she tells me that my bf shouldn’t let me pay for food. she said
- “so paiseh bro u make a girl pay”
- “if i was working there i will judge the dude bro”.
i just was kinda mad la so i said “why i cannot pay, i pay first he transfer me back mah, is just ppl dont know” then she said “ppl just see like eyer why this guy let the girl pay, but its also weird if he pay first then u go and transfer him back”
how is it weird bro. it’s not like she doesn’t know my bf doesn’t get much allowance and it’s hard for him to get part time shifts. he already gives his availability but still doesn’t get scheduled, it’s not his fault. so he goes and finds random event jobs to do here and there, and honestly i’m proud of him.
then the moment he gets work, he immediately tells me he wants to go out with me more and even lists multiples places he wants to eat at together, and want to do more activities with me. i of course heart pain la, he work so hard then just spend the money with me. so i say i want to treat him to a meal. to me it didn’t seem like he was embarassed or anything…he just turned it around and say i’m not working and he doesn’t want me to spend on him. he say im unnecessary wasting money 😭
then my friend still want to say all these things… like bro, i just want to treat him cannot meh. anyway my bf also agreed to it alr. LOL. tbh my allowance is quite high (i think it’s quite high for a student lah..), higher than my social circle, and sometimes i pay for him, sometimes i buy him stuff. if i can afford and i just want to pay, cannot meh? he gets so excited when i buy surprise him with some small gifts, and honestly his reaction is damn sweet and cute (so lowkey makes me want to buy more just to see his reaction cos I LOVE IT HAHA)
we are still students, so i don’t expect anything monetary from him. just give me your love and be loyal. THATS IT.
for the record, he also likes to buy me random gifts and insists on paying for my meals whenever he manages to get some shifts. even if he doesn’t get many shifts, he still buys for me lor. so idk what’s my friend on about. don’t make me dulan pls.