u/Efficient_Sign4717

I used to think that love was sweet.

Love was easy, Love was peace.

I thought two people just looked at one another,

And instantly knew that,

one wanted the other.

I thought love was an instant rush,

A sudden knowing,

A desire to touch.

When I thought of love,

I thought of two people,

Two people happy, united,

Two people side by side.

I thought of hand holding,

passion and lust.

I thought it was validation,

felt in a touch.

I thought trust was unspoken,

support was a given.

I thought of two people,

Who shared a world, where nothing was ever hidden.

I did not think of fear—

I did not think of confusion.

I thought love was clear—

But this was all an illusion.

To love was to be vulnerable.

With love - there came fear.

Love rarely felt reasonable,

Love could be quite unfair.

Love wasn’t so beautiful—

love left me scared.

When it comes to loving,

I don’t think you can ever, truly be prepared.

For love is not linear—

love does not care.

When you love the wrong person,

you’ll be left fighting despair.

As I started healing

And my heart had time to repair,

I was called back to love—to find its true meaning.

Love had made me suffer—

but not without a reason.

Then I started to compare, all my love over the years,

Each was like its own season ,

Each felt more than I could bare.

When thinking about love now—

I had too many feelings.

What was it I believed in?

Deep in introspection—

what had love achieved?

Believing in love had left me feeling,

Lost , alone, deceived.

This had to be a lesson,

So what was it I was failing to see ?

Restitution!

Love was never the problem—

it was how It was perceive,

how we define love, was the hidden deceit.

Love is more than emotion—

Love is bigger than we believe.

Love had been denied in desire and forgotten by compulsion to need.

Love was never the flower—love is always the seed.

Love is the testing journey,

the sacred path,

Back to me.

It is an ancient scripture—too powerful to react.

Love is not just an emotion—

It is a lock and a key.

It’s an energetic connection.

A communion of the divine—

It’s strength in pain that was crafted,

To not leave you the same.

Love is the call to believe, in more than what we can see.

It’s an awakening and a remembrance,

An activation deep within.

It is trusting and a knowing,

Of the divided twin.

It’s where truth that has been hidden,

Acknowledging we are the ancient beings.

I used to think that love was sweet.

Love was easy, Love was peace.

I thought two people just looked at one another,

And instantly knew that,

one wanted the other.

I thought love was an instant rush,

A sudden knowing,

A desire to touch.

When I thought of love,

I thought of two people,

Two people happy, united,

Two people side by side.

I thought of hand holding,

passion and lust.

I thought it was validation,

felt in a touch.

I thought trust was unspoken,

support was a given.

I thought of two people,

Who shared a world, where nothing was ever hidden.

I did not think of fear—

I did not think of confusion.

I thought love was clear—

But this was all an illusion.

To love was to be vulnerable.

With love - there came fear.

Love rarely felt reasonable,

Love could be quite unfair.

Love wasn’t so beautiful—

love left me scared.

When it comes to loving,

I don’t think you can ever, truly be prepared.

For love is not linear—

love does not care.

When you love the wrong person,

you’ll be left fighting despair.

As I started healing

And my heart had time to repair,

I was called back to love—to find its true meaning.

Love had made me suffer—

but not without a reason.

Then I started to compare, all my love over the years,

Each was like its own season ,

Each felt more than I could bare.

When thinking about love now—

I had too many feelings.

What was it I believed in?

Deep in introspection—

what had love achieved?

Believing in love had left me feeling,

Lost , alone, deceived.

This had to be a lesson,

So what was it I was failing to see ?

Restitution!

Love was never the problem—

it was how It was perceive,

how we define love, was the hidden deceit.

Love is more than emotion—

Love is bigger than we believe.

Love had been denied in desire and forgotten by compulsion to need.

Love was never the flower—love is always the seed.

Love is the testing journey,

the sacred path,

Back to me.

It is an ancient scripture—too powerful to react.

Love is not just an emotion—

It is a lock and a key.

It’s an energetic connection.

A communion of the divine—

It’s strength in pain that was crafted,

To not leave you the same.

Love is the call to believe, in more than what we can see.

It’s an awakening and a remembrance,

An activation deep within.

It is trusting and a knowing,

Of the divided twin.

It’s where truth that has been hidden,

Acknowledging we are the ancient beings.

I used to think that love was sweet.

Love was easy, Love was peace.

I thought two people just looked at one another,

And instantly knew that,

one wanted the other.

I thought love was an instant rush,

A sudden knowing,

A desire to touch.

When I thought of love,

I thought of two people,

Two people happy, united,

Two people side by side.

I thought of hand holding,

passion and lust.

I thought it was validation,

felt in a touch.

I thought trust was unspoken,

support was a given.

I thought of two people,

Who shared a world, where nothing was ever hidden.

I did not think of fear—

I did not think of confusion.

I thought love was clear—

But this was all an illusion.

To love was to be vulnerable.

With love - there came fear.

Love rarely felt reasonable,

Love could be quite unfair.

Love wasn’t so beautiful—

love left me scared.

When it comes to loving,

I don’t think you can ever, truly be prepared.

For love is not linear—

love does not care.

When you love the wrong person,

you’ll be left fighting despair.

As I started healing

And my heart had time to repair,

I was called back to love—to find its true meaning.

Love had made me suffer—

but not without a reason.

Then I started to compare, all my love over the years,

Each was like its own season ,

Each felt more than I could bare.

When thinking about love now—

I had too many feelings.

What was it I believed in?

Deep in introspection—

what had love achieved?

Believing in love had left me feeling,

Lost , alone, deceived.

This had to be a lesson,

So what was it I was failing to see ?

Restitution!

Love was never the problem—

it was how It was perceive,

how we define love, was the hidden deceit.

Love is more than emotion—

Love is bigger than we believe.

Love had been denied in desire and forgotten by compulsion to need.

Love was never the flower—love is always the seed.

Love is the testing journey,

the sacred path,

Back to me.

It is an ancient scripture—too powerful to react.

Love is not just an emotion—

It is a lock and a key.

It’s an energetic connection.

A communion of the divine—

It’s strength in pain that was crafted,

To not leave you the same.

Love is the call to believe, in more than what we can see.

It’s an awakening and a remembrance,

An activation deep within.

It is trusting and a knowing,

Of the divided twin.

It’s where truth that has been hidden,

Acknowledging we are the ancient beings.

My heart is heavy, heaving, trying to understand the reason,

Why for you my feelings aren’t feelings fleeting,

But yours are feelings leaving,

Feelings that change quicker than the season.

But more incomprehensible, is it's you who still responsible,

For my heart bruised, the beating undeniable.

Beaten by you who's only liable by consequence of your impetuous and indisputable act of indefinable, soul wrenching treason.

My heart is broken, bleeding, I’m trying to understand the reason.

Because of you I’m left to ponder, how is it I could possibly be fonder,

Of you now than I was just yonder, despite of all that you have done, dear.

I really have to wonder, what kind of black spell it is you have me under,

For your attention is the only cure deemed,

To satisfy this lover's hunger.

Starved, withholding your love, you let me suffer,

Till suddenly I disencumber,

To become the hunter in which you succumb.

What was it you were thinking, dear, when playing this game that you began—

Toy with one's emotions and you’re guaranteed the need to run—

Forgetting or just neglecting the result of your sick idea of fun, is why you will always find yourself, the one to run, hun, from situations ever so dumb.

Again, because of you I am left to ponder,

For you I often have to wonder, why despite all of my love, dear, it is still that you don’t care?

I really feel this to be so unfair how with such ease you can act like I’m not there.

To go on like this I don’t dare, what you inflict is more than one's heart should bear; this my love just might be the last tear.

My heart is heavy, heaving, trying to understand the reason,

Why for you my feelings aren’t feelings fleeting,

But yours are feelings leaving,

Feelings that change quicker than the season.

But more incomprehensible, is it's you who still responsible,

For my heart bruised, the beating undeniable.

Beaten by you who's only liable by consequence of your impetuous and indisputable act of indefinable, soul wrenching treason.

My heart is broken, bleeding, I’m trying to understand the reason.

Because of you I’m left to ponder, how is it I could possibly be fonder,

Of you now than I was just yonder, despite of all that you have done, dear.

I really have to wonder, what kind of black spell it is you have me under,

For your attention is the only cure deemed,

To satisfy this lover's hunger.

Starved, withholding your love, you let me suffer,

Till suddenly I disencumber,

To become the hunter in which you succumb.

What was it you were thinking, dear, when playing this game that you began—

Toy with one's emotions and you’re guaranteed the need to run—

Forgetting or just neglecting the result of your sick idea of fun, is why you will always find yourself, the one to run, hun, from situations ever so dumb.

Again, because of you I am left to ponder,

For you I often have to wonder, why despite all of my love, dear, it is still that you don’t care?

I really feel this to be so unfair how with such ease you can act like I’m not there.

To go on like this I don’t dare, what you inflict is more than one's heart should bear; this my love just might be the last tear.

🐾 Animals

I'm not a bad person.

I’m just easily badly influenced.

Maybe because I was heavily under their influence?

Or the influence?

Or was it just influent?

I've burned a few calories,

Only ate celery,

Done enough for hell most days,

Lived those in a daze,

Know a few different ways,

Navigated through the haze

MeIBURN city.

I no longer burn at the gym,

Though I've possibly burned with a guy named Jim,

Certainly, enjoyed a fair few Gins,

But that was with tonic,

Never with Jim.

Humans are animals.

Some are prey,

Some just pray,

Some will play,

While others hunt their pray.

Some are big and friendly,

Some are big and scary,

Some are small and cute,

Some stay up and they will have a hoot.

Others be weary of as they toot or boot,

Calling with their glass flute.

Quickly go and hide your lute,

Then make sure you give them the boot.

Others are harmless,

While the rest would harm for less,

Then your dignity.

Maybe I’m just trying too hard

To be witty....

You get me?

If not, you don't get me.

But whatever you get me,

Make sure it’s not just to get me

On your meat,

'Coz they've all just out bet me,

Or was it just bets on me?

I bet you’re thinking

Don't tempt me,

'Coz it all sounds pretty tempting.

I wonder if you get me.

I don't know,

I will for now-

Just let it be.

It was all very tempting.

Maybe you deserved me?

Maybe it was just a facade,

A real-life fantasy you had made

To hide what you truly craved.

You can't deny

What's wanted so badly?

Happiness was the trade,

Sacrificed me,

Leaving ever so sadly.

Love is free,

But not without a fee.

People are animals.

Eat or be eaten.

But which ones run in loyal packs

And which ones do loyalty lack?

Out for their own like

DOGS hunting for bones.

Dogs, I tell ya,

They are Dogs.

Their love is selfless,

Selfish,

Shellfish.

Dogs deserve good homes.

30s

What is life like at 30?

Dirty?

Dirty as unclear?

Dirty as covered up,

Or cover up?

Dirty.

Hiding the more that was to be seen?

Regret will shine once clean.

But nothing is as you expect.

I am a surprise that takes a hit.

Too many hits,

Too many ways,

You’ll never know what you'll get.

My life is a game,

It's a gamble,

I've lost all the bets.

But I’ve lived a privileged life.

I was offered everything,

But given nothing.

I know nothing is for nothing.

Something is worth some things,

While others will take everything.

Then there are all the other things,

That can only be bought

With killed hopes and broken dreams.

It will leave you down and drawn out

Like a piece of string,

And yes, you're going to feel it sting.

But I like to work for it,

So, I don’t owe a thing.

As what easy comes in

Will be just as quick leaving.

People are like animals,

But they don't understand the herd,

Or the hurt.

Fuck them all.

It’s all about what's been heard.

Cheeky little tweety bird

Forgot about the pact,

Played full of tack,

and just packed their own,

Leaving the rest without a home.

Today,

We are all alone.

Is this not why the loan wolf is lone?

Pipe dreams, drag queens, drug fiends,

But a friend to lean?

Is it because it makes them too mean?

Or just unstable as they’re too lean?

I don't know,

But it’s all smoke clouds and broken dreams.

Nothing is ever as it seems.

Who knows?

Maybe it’s because they were never keen,

Or maybe it was 'cos they know what I seen.

But one thing’s for sure:

It’s all smoke clouds and you're told it's a dream.

I know the type—

The ones that wake you with your own scream:

"BUT YOU'RE CRAZY!"

You've been too caught up engaged watching the screen.

Or maybe it was just the territory of the crazy fucked up scene.

But I know one thing

that they hadn't seen what I seen.

They don't believe what you hid behind that cheeky once gleam.

Humans are animals,

But I’m not a snitch.

But I have been stitched

Up.

Up a downwards spiral.

But I found my ground,

And it was fucking solid.

I was strong,

While I know a lot that folded,

Yet I’m the one who's holded.

But I’m stronger than them.

I’ve moved boulders.

My conscience remains clear

As I’m getting older.

Still I keep hearing:

"I fucking told her."

Forgetting I am the one alone,

Hurt and cold here.

Don't sweat it,

I'll still grab ya a cold beer.

I've always got time for those

I once did hold dear.

Pantheism

I know who I am.

I am not Sam.

I don't try beating the man.

I’m hated by my fam.

I go off like goddammit:

Baby BAM!

WHAM!

I don't get by

By pleasing the male's ham.

Fuck that!

He can keep using his hand.

Because I have self-respect,

I will take my stance.

And for that, they react

Like I've talked on the stand.

They're just pussies—

I’m more of a man.

I’ve handled myself

Better than they can.

They'd rather give themselves a permanent life ban,

Of the freedom and liberation

That comes with using a helping hand,

Without the expectation

Of the satisfaction

That's got when self-indulging with a hand,

One used for pleasing their ham.

I get my pleasure in knowing

I’ve done all I can,

And I’d do it all again for you.

It's fucked, goddam.

🐾 Animals

I'm not a bad person.

I’m just easily badly influenced.

Maybe because I was heavily under their influence?

Or the influence?

Or was it just influent?

I've burned a few calories,

Only ate celery,

Done enough for hell most days,

Lived those in a daze,

Know a few different ways,

Navigated through the haze

MeIBURN city.

I no longer burn at the gym,

Though I've possibly burned with a guy named Jim,

Certainly, enjoyed a fair few Gins,

But that was with tonic,

Never with Jim.

Humans are animals.

Some are prey,

Some just pray,

Some will play,

While others hunt their pray.

Some are big and friendly,

Some are big and scary,

Some are small and cute,

Some stay up and they will have a hoot.

Others be weary of as they toot or boot,

Calling with their glass flute.

Quickly go and hide your lute,

Then make sure you give them the boot.

Others are harmless,

While the rest would harm for less,

Then your dignity.

Maybe I’m just trying too hard

To be witty....

You get me?

If not, you don't get me.

But whatever you get me,

Make sure it’s not just to get me

On your meat,

'Coz they've all just out bet me,

Or was it just bets on me?

I bet you’re thinking

Don't tempt me,

'Coz it all sounds pretty tempting.

I wonder if you get me.

I don't know,

I will for now-

Just let it be.

It was all very tempting.

Maybe you deserved me?

Maybe it was just a facade,

A real-life fantasy you had made

To hide what you truly craved.

You can't deny

What's wanted so badly?

Happiness was the trade,

Sacrificed me,

Leaving ever so sadly.

Love is free,

But not without a fee.

People are animals.

Eat or be eaten.

But which ones run in loyal packs

And which ones do loyalty lack?

Out for their own like

DOGS hunting for bones.

Dogs, I tell ya,

They are Dogs.

Their love is selfless,

Selfish,

Shellfish.

Dogs deserve good homes.

30s

What is life like at 30?

Dirty?

Dirty as unclear?

Dirty as covered up,

Or cover up?

Dirty.

Hiding the more that was to be seen?

Regret will shine once clean.

But nothing is as you expect.

I am a surprise that takes a hit.

Too many hits,

Too many ways,

You’ll never know what you'll get.

My life is a game,

It's a gamble,

I've lost all the bets.

But I’ve lived a privileged life.

I was offered everything,

But given nothing.

I know nothing is for nothing.

Something is worth some things,

While others will take everything.

Then there are all the other things,

That can only be bought

With killed hopes and broken dreams.

It will leave you down and drawn out

Like a piece of string,

And yes, you're going to feel it sting.

But I like to work for it,

So, I don’t owe a thing.

As what easy comes in

Will be just as quick leaving.

People are like animals,

But they don't understand the herd,

Or the hurt.

Fuck them all.

It’s all about what's been heard.

Cheeky little tweety bird

Forgot about the pact,

Played full of tack,

and just packed their own,

Leaving the rest without a home.

Today,

We are all alone.

Is this not why the loan wolf is lone?

Pipe dreams, drag queens, drug fiends,

But a friend to lean?

Is it because it makes them too mean?

Or just unstable as they’re too lean?

I don't know,

But it’s all smoke clouds and broken dreams.

Nothing is ever as it seems.

Who knows?

Maybe it’s because they were never keen,

Or maybe it was 'cos they know what I seen.

But one thing’s for sure:

It’s all smoke clouds and you're told it's a dream.

I know the type—

The ones that wake you with your own scream:

"BUT YOU'RE CRAZY!"

You've been too caught up engaged watching the screen.

Or maybe it was just the territory of the crazy fucked up scene.

But I know one thing

that they hadn't seen what I seen.

They don't believe what you hid behind that cheeky once gleam.

Humans are animals,

But I’m not a snitch.

But I have been stitched

Up.

Up a downwards spiral.

But I found my ground,

And it was fucking solid.

I was strong,

While I know a lot that folded,

Yet I’m the one who's holded.

But I’m stronger than them.

I’ve moved boulders.

My conscience remains clear

As I’m getting older.

Still I keep hearing:

"I fucking told her."

Forgetting I am the one alone,

Hurt and cold here.

Don't sweat it,

I'll still grab ya a cold beer.

I've always got time for those

I once did hold dear.

Pantheism

I know who I am.

I am not Sam.

I don't try beating the man.

I’m hated by my fam.

I go off like goddammit:

Baby BAM!

WHAM!

I don't get by

By pleasing the male's ham.

Fuck that!

He can keep using his hand.

Because I have self-respect,

I will take my stance.

And for that, they react

Like I've talked on the stand.

They're just pussies—

I’m more of a man.

I’ve handled myself

Better than they can.

They'd rather give themselves a permanent life ban,

Of the freedom and liberation

That comes with using a helping hand,

Without the expectation

Of the satisfaction

That's got when self-indulging with a hand,

One used for pleasing their ham.

I get my pleasure in knowing

I’ve done all I can,

And I’d do it all again for you.

It's fucked, goddam.

🐾 Animals

I'm not a bad person.

I’m just easily badly influenced.

Maybe because I was heavily under their influence?

Or the influence?

Or was it just influent?

I've burned a few calories,

Only ate celery,

Done enough for hell most days,

Lived those in a daze,

Know a few different ways,

Navigated through the haze

MeIBURN city.

I no longer burn at the gym,

Though I've possibly burned with a guy named Jim,

Certainly, enjoyed a fair few Gins,

But that was with tonic,

Never with Jim.

Humans are animals.

Some are prey,

Some just pray,

Some will play,

While others hunt their pray.

Some are big and friendly,

Some are big and scary,

Some are small and cute,

Some stay up and they will have a hoot.

Others be weary of as they toot or boot,

Calling with their glass flute.

Quickly go and hide your lute,

Then make sure you give them the boot.

Others are harmless,

While the rest would harm for less,

Then your dignity.

Maybe I’m just trying too hard

To be witty....

You get me?

If not, you don't get me.

But whatever you get me,

Make sure it’s not just to get me

On your meat,

'Coz they've all just out bet me,

Or was it just bets on me?

I bet you’re thinking

Don't tempt me,

'Coz it all sounds pretty tempting.

I wonder if you get me.

I don't know,

I will for now-

Just let it be.

It was all very tempting.

Maybe you deserved me?

Maybe it was just a facade,

A real-life fantasy you had made

To hide what you truly craved.

You can't deny

What's wanted so badly?

Happiness was the trade,

Sacrificed me,

Leaving ever so sadly.

Love is free,

But not without a fee.

People are animals.

Eat or be eaten.

But which ones run in loyal packs

And which ones do loyalty lack?

Out for their own like

DOGS hunting for bones.

Dogs, I tell ya,

They are Dogs.

Their love is selfless,

Selfish,

Shellfish.

Dogs deserve good homes.

30s

What is life like at 30?

Dirty?

Dirty as unclear?

Dirty as covered up,

Or cover up?

Dirty.

Hiding the more that was to be seen?

Regret will shine once clean.

But nothing is as you expect.

I am a surprise that takes a hit.

Too many hits,

Too many ways,

You’ll never know what you'll get.

My life is a game,

It's a gamble,

I've lost all the bets.

But I’ve lived a privileged life.

I was offered everything,

But given nothing.

I know nothing is for nothing.

Something is worth some things,

While others will take everything.

Then there are all the other things,

That can only be bought

With killed hopes and broken dreams.

It will leave you down and drawn out

Like a piece of string,

And yes, you're going to feel it sting.

But I like to work for it,

So, I don’t owe a thing.

As what easy comes in

Will be just as quick leaving.

People are like animals,

But they don't understand the herd,

Or the hurt.

Fuck them all.

It’s all about what's been heard.

Cheeky little tweety bird

Forgot about the pact,

Played full of tack,

and just packed their own,

Leaving the rest without a home.

Today,

We are all alone.

Is this not why the loan wolf is lone?

Pipe dreams, drag queens, drug fiends,

But a friend to lean?

Is it because it makes them too mean?

Or just unstable as they’re too lean?

I don't know,

But it’s all smoke clouds and broken dreams.

Nothing is ever as it seems.

Who knows?

Maybe it’s because they were never keen,

Or maybe it was 'cos they know what I seen.

But one thing’s for sure:

It’s all smoke clouds and you're told it's a dream.

I know the type—

The ones that wake you with your own scream:

"BUT YOU'RE CRAZY!"

You've been too caught up engaged watching the screen.

Or maybe it was just the territory of the crazy fucked up scene.

But I know one thing

that they hadn't seen what I seen.

They don't believe what you hid behind that cheeky once gleam.

Humans are animals,

But I’m not a snitch.

But I have been stitched

Up.

Up a downwards spiral.

But I found my ground,

And it was fucking solid.

I was strong,

While I know a lot that folded,

Yet I’m the one who's holded.

But I’m stronger than them.

I’ve moved boulders.

My conscience remains clear

As I’m getting older.

Still I keep hearing:

"I fucking told her."

Forgetting I am the one alone,

Hurt and cold here.

Don't sweat it,

I'll still grab ya a cold beer.

I've always got time for those

I once did hold dear.

Pantheism

I know who I am.

I am not Sam.

I don't try beating the man.

I’m hated by my fam.

I go off like goddammit:

Baby BAM!

WHAM!

I don't get by

By pleasing the male's ham.

Fuck that!

He can keep using his hand.

Because I have self-respect,

I will take my stance.

And for that, they react

Like I've talked on the stand.

They're just pussies—

I’m more of a man.

I’ve handled myself

Better than they can.

They'd rather give themselves a permanent life ban,

Of the freedom and liberation

That comes with using a helping hand,

Without the expectation

Of the satisfaction

That's got when self-indulging with a hand,

One used for pleasing their ham.

I get my pleasure in knowing

I’ve done all I can,

And I’d do it all again for you.

It's fucked, goddam.

🐾 Animals

I'm not a bad person.

I’m just easily badly influenced.

Maybe because I was heavily under their influence?

Or the influence?

Or was it just influent?

I've burned a few calories,

Only ate celery,

Done enough for hell most days,

Lived those in a daze,

Know a few different ways,

Navigated through the haze

MeIBURN city.

I no longer burn at the gym,

Though I've possibly burned with a guy named Jim,

Certainly, enjoyed a fair few Gins,

But that was with tonic,

Never with Jim.

Humans are animals.

Some are prey,

Some just pray,

Some will play,

While others hunt their pray.

Some are big and friendly,

Some are big and scary,

Some are small and cute,

Some stay up and they will have a hoot.

Others be weary of as they toot or boot,

Calling with their glass flute.

Quickly go and hide your lute,

Then make sure you give them the boot.

Others are harmless,

While the rest would harm for less,

Then your dignity.

Maybe I’m just trying too hard

To be witty....

You get me?

If not, you don't get me.

But whatever you get me,

Make sure it’s not just to get me

On your meat,

'Coz they've all just out bet me,

Or was it just bets on me?

I bet you’re thinking

Don't tempt me,

'Coz it all sounds pretty tempting.

I wonder if you get me.

I don't know,

I will for now-

Just let it be.

It was all very tempting.

Maybe you deserved me?

Maybe it was just a facade,

A real-life fantasy you had made

To hide what you truly craved.

You can't deny

What's wanted so badly?

Happiness was the trade,

Sacrificed me,

Leaving ever so sadly.

Love is free,

But not without a fee.

People are animals.

Eat or be eaten.

But which ones run in loyal packs

And which ones do loyalty lack?

Out for their own like

DOGS hunting for bones.

Dogs, I tell ya,

They are Dogs.

Their love is selfless,

Selfish,

Shellfish.

Dogs deserve good homes.

30s

What is life like at 30?

Dirty?

Dirty as unclear?

Dirty as covered up,

Or cover up?

Dirty.

Hiding the more that was to be seen?

Regret will shine once clean.

But nothing is as you expect.

I am a surprise that takes a hit.

Too many hits,

Too many ways,

You’ll never know what you'll get.

My life is a game,

It's a gamble,

I've lost all the bets.

But I’ve lived a privileged life.

I was offered everything,

But given nothing.

I know nothing is for nothing.

Something is worth some things,

While others will take everything.

Then there are all the other things,

That can only be bought

With killed hopes and broken dreams.

It will leave you down and drawn out

Like a piece of string,

And yes, you're going to feel it sting.

But I like to work for it,

So, I don’t owe a thing.

As what easy comes in

Will be just as quick leaving.

People are like animals,

But they don't understand the herd,

Or the hurt.

Fuck them all.

It’s all about what's been heard.

Cheeky little tweety bird

Forgot about the pact,

Played full of tack,

and just packed their own,

Leaving the rest without a home.

Today,

We are all alone.

Is this not why the loan wolf is lone?

Pipe dreams, drag queens, drug fiends,

But a friend to lean?

Is it because it makes them too mean?

Or just unstable as they’re too lean?

I don't know,

But it’s all smoke clouds and broken dreams.

Nothing is ever as it seems.

Who knows?

Maybe it’s because they were never keen,

Or maybe it was 'cos they know what I seen.

But one thing’s for sure:

It’s all smoke clouds and you're told it's a dream.

I know the type—

The ones that wake you with your own scream:

"BUT YOU'RE CRAZY!"

You've been too caught up engaged watching the screen.

Or maybe it was just the territory of the crazy fucked up scene.

But I know one thing

that they hadn't seen what I seen.

They don't believe what you hid behind that cheeky once gleam.

Humans are animals,

But I’m not a snitch.

But I have been stitched

Up.

Up a downwards spiral.

But I found my ground,

And it was fucking solid.

I was strong,

While I know a lot that folded,

Yet I’m the one who's holded.

But I’m stronger than them.

I’ve moved boulders.

My conscience remains clear

As I’m getting older.

Still I keep hearing:

"I fucking told her."

Forgetting I am the one alone,

Hurt and cold here.

Don't sweat it,

I'll still grab ya a cold beer.

I've always got time for those

I once did hold dear.

Pantheism

I know who I am.

I am not Sam.

I don't try beating the man.

I’m hated by my fam.

I go off like goddammit:

Baby BAM!

WHAM!

I don't get by

By pleasing the male's ham.

Fuck that!

He can keep using his hand.

Because I have self-respect,

I will take my stance.

And for that, they react

Like I've talked on the stand.

They're just pussies—

I’m more of a man.

I’ve handled myself

Better than they can.

They'd rather give themselves a permanent life ban,

Of the freedom and liberation

That comes with using a helping hand,

Without the expectation

Of the satisfaction

That's got when self-indulging with a hand,

One used for pleasing their ham.

I get my pleasure in knowing

I’ve done all I can,

And I’d do it all again for you.

It's fucked, goddam.