I have tried a lot of coming out of the ptsd and trauma of the abusive relationship but I can't. I tried therapy and everything possible but now I just want the pain to end at once.I can never get out of the trauma.I get triggered by small things.The abusive voices run in my head.I feel like dying every second.
I was in a 7 years relationship with 4 years of brutual verbal emotional and traumatic abuse and now every body part of me aches.I cannot do things properly.I get shocks at night and suddenly wake up.I try to do things but at everything I do I hear a brutal abuse at that moment in his voice in my head.He is living happily and is happy with every other women.But blamed me and left me even after everything.No I have a surgery of tumour on 14th and even never asked me about my health for once whether asked me for help a few days back in his problem.Kindly guide me.I dont want him back.I want to heal from now on.
I am going for a tumour surgery on 14th and my abuser even did not come in such a critical situation though he took help from me a few days back.He moved on and blamed me abused me slut shammed me but still is enjoying his every moment as if I was a piece of nothing for him.It makes be feel worse.He even happily flirts and behaves good with any other women.
As someone who once thought of giving up my life.This group is helping me a lot.Though I have just started my process of coming out of the abuse.But many of you helped me at my worst.So its just a thank you note for everyone who took a moment to help others or atleast try.
Can someone help me with some teaching to forget abuse damage which wa for a long time.I was constantly abused for 4 years day and night.So my nervous system is broken and I think I have PTSD.Some recommendations to get out of it?
Does anyone have an idea when the forms will be released?I mean when will the counselling process start?
Why do I keep thinking about the person all the time even though he brutally abused me both verbally and emotionally ans called me names.He has kept me block telling how bad I am and that I am a man attracter and that I would love to expose myself to get male attraction as I am ugly.But still after he blocked me.I kept rewinding all the memories and I just cant stop.Why am I stuck in such a pattern?