u/Citruslor

i am pregnant and my parents have forgotten everything that happened in our lives and they want to come ”help” me now and want to share this happiness with me. Okay I do believe that they are happy and want to share it.

but I have realized I don’t want them to see me at this vulnerable stage where I am fully emotionally and trying to transition into a new chapter of my life. They have not been supportive to me in any of such low phases and rather criticized me or said they already expected that I wouldn’t be successful.

My mother want to help me breastfeed and dress me when I m in pain but she will make comments about my body how I didn’t get her genetics because she was so “thin“ during her pregnancy and postpartum that no one knew she was pregnant or that she had such high pain tolerance that she never even complained about her contractions. 😑

my parents also shamed my sis in law for having to undergo an emergency C sec and said to me that she could have tried not to. Now how can I trust them to be okay with whatever i go through!!!? No way.

So I read a few posts and comments that Santa Monica DMV is difficult to pass.

I have driving anxiety and I am in my 30’s. I did not grow up in the US and never drove before so driving is a big deal for me.

I was really worried if I ll ever pass.

I failed in my first test but most were minor mistakes. yes the examiners aren’t super lenient but I felt they were sweet and encouraging after the test. They were also fair, I did do those mistakes.

I practiced and retested in 2 weeks and passed.

only comment I got was I drive too slow and LA drivers get frustrated if I do this lol.

but if someone is anxious to take test in Santa Monica, please don’t. driving was my Everest and I could do it!

Good luck to anyone taking

This is a rant!

I am currently pregnant.

my parents live in a diff country and they visited me only once a few years ago. I visit them every 2 years or so.

Context:

when I moved away from them I decided I needed to figure out life by myself because they threatened to disown me all my life and said I am making their life miserable.

they say what all they have done for me like how much they struggled and how I am ungratefu. they never once put me first and supported me when I was low and rather criticize or pretend I dont exist.

my mother several times said I would fail in life and I can’t come running back to her. she said she wouldn’t feel bad if I am dead and just tell people how bad of a child I was.

I don’t remember ever being homesick!!

present:

I am very happy with where I am rn, I love my husband and we have built a beautiful life togethe.

now that I am pregnant (first time). they call me and shower love and tell me they want to come “help” and share this happiness with me as I am their daughter. in our culture a girl is pregnant, her parents take full incharge of her health and help her recover blah blah.

I don’t trust them and their love. I don’t think they will bring a calm into my new phase. they will bring chaos. I don’t want them to be here when I am at a vulnerable state of having a child and after. my husband and I want to have our own experience and then slowly invite family members into our kid’s life.

even if I was a rebellious kid my sibling who’s the most obedient and loyal child has encountered parental heartbreak and they haven’t spoken with love since then. I am more mad for how they made HIM too feel resentful!!!

Rory in season 1 was not at all like Lorelai as in she wasn‘t fast talking super witty but the opposite, she was more calm, yes a bit witty but not like lorelai witty. Infact in season 1 only lorelai talked fast and most town folks are just normal pace talking.

They try to make Rory more and more like Lorelai after she met Logan and more during her dropped out of Yale and worked at the DAR. I hate every interaction she had organizing that event and people at the DAR.

is it just me or does it comes off as Rory didn’t have much of her own personality in later seasons but just shes going through events of her life.

Omg I feel like I climbed my Mt Everest today. 😭

I am 35 F. I grew in a very chaotic country and city where people drive horribly and I always thought if i drive I might definitely die.

My first driving experience was 10 years ago in North Carolina when I had a driving instructor who was so sweet but to take me to the test, the driving school guy came who was very rude and frustrated to wake up that early lol. with the way he treated me I couldn't don’t do anything and failed my test.

Then my Boyfriend (now husband) started teaching me. I was terribly anxious and never understood anything I am supposed to do.

we then moved to a city that’s so walkable and we didn’t own a car as well.

After moving again to a car dependent city I have finally decided I should climb this mountain now!

last year in Sep I gave my test for permit and I practiced a lottttt! I think I am a bit wiser and older so I could easily understand some things I couldnt 10 years ago.

Gave my test 2 weeks ago first and made some small mistakes that led me to not pass. But I was still happy I came this far and wasn’t scared anymore.

Today I retested and finally passed 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉

if you read to this end. Also fun fact I am now in my second trimester of pregnancy 😭🙏 I can finally drive my baby as well by myself!

Whoever is anxious please know this, if I got it you got it. ❤️❤️❤️

I would like any and every suggestion to keep my house clean and clutter free (as much as possible) for some peace and quiet.

I am trying to have some good habits to avoid chaos in life at this point.

What are your best practices?

I was wondering, they either marry the girls off and depending on the matches they can go to colonies as wives or a high ranking commander.

they usually make someone a handmaid that’s from outside Gilead right?

do they make next generations also handmaids?

Siblings tho peraganI vallu how was your childhood and now your life as an adult?

ante evaranna unte bagundu anipistundha or no sharing enduku we are happy antara?

me parents meku Entha attention icharu and overall what’s your opinion now about being a single child?

Edit: wow thank you for so many great answers!

I am planning to have a postpartum doula. I wanted to know how trustable are they and how helpful? and when should I start interviewing them? I am almost the end of first trimester

I had people in and out since 3 days doing some repairs and then cleaning. I secured all my belongings. But I think My AirPods were in my night stand drawer. I wasn't using them much. I am pregnant and nauseous all day when the work was happening and stepped out at one point because I couldn't take the smell of it.

This morning tried to find them and saw location was in some place I have never been updated 5 min ago and still updating.

I filed a report already. Called the companies I hired to verify if it is their employees. what else can I do?

I do not want go to some location and confront anyone. I m afraid of that.

Thanks!

I don’t know what flair to add here.

ok I dreamt that I was in Gilead, but this was also some program where people outside Gilead can go to school and then by the end of the day some back out. No phones allowed obviously and outsiders won’t know your whereabouts. So all the school teenagers also secretly built their internet inside, own social media.

so there was an incident and I couldnt get out of Gilead in time. After a lot of time passed I finally did.

lol here’s comes the most random cross over:

as soon as I got out I saw, Dexter (from the tv show) was a care taker for me and he tried to find me. end! (Any Dexter fans)?

lol sorry if this was super random. But I now want to see Dexter a part of mayday!!

hello, I am 12 weeks pregnant and my friend is due in May.

whenever we talk, she kept referring to vaginal delivery as “normal” and how we can achieve it.

I don’t want to initiate a discussion with her as I don’t think it’s my business, so I didn't say anything.

But I once told her my parents shamed my sister in law when she had to go through a C section, and that’s why I am not comfortable having them around whether I have it or not. My friend kind of defended them and said I should give them another chance.

It frustrates me so much that a friend I admired since we were is now thinking this. it shattered my illusion of hers.