u/Basic_Travel_149

I really need advice from people who understand this because I feel genuinely overwhelmed and ashamed of how intense my emotions get. When I split or feel rejected/abandoned/angry, it feels like my whole body is on fire and my brain can’t handle it. The emotions get so big so fast that sometimes the only thing that makes it stop for a second is hurting myself, especially hitting or bashing my head against the floor/wall.

I know that’s not healthy and I’m not trying to glorify it at all. I just genuinely don’t know how to regulate emotions that feel this extreme. It feels like my brain goes from 0 to 100 instantly and I can’t think logically once I’m there. Afterwards I usually feel embarrassed, guilty, exhausted, and scared of myself.

I also have ASD which makes emotional overwhelm even harder to process, and sometimes I feel like people don’t understand how physically painful emotions can feel.

Has anyone found things that actually help in those moments before it gets to that point? DBT skills, grounding techniques, medications, distractions, literally anything. I’m tired of feeling controlled by my emotions and I don’t want to keep coping this way.

So this situation has gotten really messy and I honestly don’t know if I’m in the wrong anymore.

I (19F) have been dating my boyfriend for a while, and from pretty early on, his family hasn’t really liked me. I’ve got ASD, so I struggle with food, my bfs sister has worse ASD than me so I thought his mum would understand. I was kicked out of the house due to not eating her soup, (she’s an alcoholic, hoarder and overall disgusting) she told me there was rotten tomatoes and carrots in the soup, so as any human, I didn’t eat it, so I was kicked out of the house and made to look like a villan because i didn’t eat her soup.Besides that, I’ve always felt like I was being judged or excluded, but I still tried to be respectful and polite whenever I was around them.

Recently, something happened (an argument involving my bf), and apparently I was heard in the background getting upset. After that, his mum sent me a long message saying I’ve caused “upheaval” in their family since day one, that no one in their family likes me, and that I basically don’t exist to them. She also told me not to contact her again unless it’s an emergency involving him.

What confused me is that she also said she used to have a “soft spot” for me, but that I ruined it over time. She even brought up her daughter and said I “messed things up there too,” which felt really unnecessary and personal.

I ended up replying, saying that my family has always treated Brock with respect and would never speak to someone the way she just spoke to me. I also said I’d respect her request not to contact her unless it involves him.

Now I’m being made to feel like I’ve caused all this drama, but I genuinely feel like I’ve been treated unfairly and spoken to in a way that crossed a line.

AITA for responding the way I did?