u/Basic_Bee5372

No one was there for me when it happened and I felt like shit but I'll be there for her now that it's her turn because that's just the way it is. It's fine. Doesn't matter. I don't really matter anyway

I'm sick of setting boundaries and asking for space only for those requests to be ignored. They say they'll do better but then not change and I'm over it. I want my personal space back, physical and mental.

Fucking Noah Kahan. Just as I'm about to leave for college, hoping to leave everyone behind in an attempt to be better and surround myself with better people. And he releases a song about failing to do just that. I hate myself, that's going to be me and I'm actually stupid for thinking things will be better.

My best friend,

At first I thought you did care, I thought it was my fault for not communicating that I wasn't doing okay. I was mad that you didn't notice but still understanding, you have a lot going on as well. I didn't want to be a burden by telling you just how bad I was doing. But I can't seem to control my emotions anymore and now you know I'm doing bad. You don't know just how bad but you know that I'm being eaten from the inside out. And you're still acting the same.

You still aren't there for me. After I was there for you through so much, you're not here for me. You say you are but actions speak louder than words and they're telling me that you couldn't care any less.

I don't know how to forgive you for all of the hurtful things you've said and for all of the hurtful things you've done. I don't know if I can. It's probably better for the both of us if we never speak again but I know that's not happening. At least not anytime soon.

So I will continue to sit here while you hurt me again and again. And I will continue to try to help you only to make things worse. It's what we've always done. It's what we'll always do. We're stuck like this, together, making each other worse and worse until one of us finally breaks and leaves the whole world behind.

- I'm sorry